The Girl Who Loved
by Darth Drafter
Summary: Sirius is dead. The Headmaster reveals to Harry what he believes the power Voldemort knows not is supposed to be. Not just 'love' but a specific kind of love. Harry disagrees. He reacts with an 8 timezone apparition to the Pools of Sorrow in China. Multicross of HP, SM and Ranma 1/2. Harry/Usagi SailorMoon
1. Pear Shaped

Insert standard legal disclaimer here. Mr. Hollywood, Mr. Writer's Layer, I'd rather not lose everything and be kicked to the curb. I don't own these characters nor will I get one red cent from their use. Currently, Harry Potter, Ranma ½, and Sailor Moon are being borrowed. More to come. Probably.

**Chapter One: Pear Shaped**

July 31st, 1996

A small line of smoke drifted up from a hut on the edge of a valley in the Bayankala mountain range in the Qinghai province of China.

It was a crisp, clear morning. It was the kind of morning where you could see clear across to the other side of the valley floor, clear enough that you could see every one of the hundreds of natural pools littering the valley floor. You could even count each and every bamboo pole jutting out of those natural springs, assuming you didn't lose count due to the somewhat heated argument being carried on by a rather portly local man and a young woman. The man appeared to be in his forties and wore a Maoist outfit. Not unusual for this part of the world. The woman looked to be in her twenties, she was quite buxom and wore some loose tangs under her rather unusual red hair; well, the hair was unusual for these parts at least. Did you notice her hair? No? Stop looking at her tits. Perhaps her dad was a western serviceman... that or she had fallen in one of the pools at some point in the past. Why would falling into a natural spring that have anything to bust size? Well just this once it does, but never mind that now.

About one hundred meters into the field of springs on the valley floor, something truly odd happened.

_-Crack-_

And with that noise, a very irate and overwhelmed boy appeared in the grass between two springs. He was crouching low with that thousand yard stare in his eyes and he didn't seem to notice that his situation just went from Very Bad to Maybe Just As Bad. That could happen when you consider that intent is one of the key factors in magic. One could say that intent was the main factor in all incidents of accidental magic. Even non-magical people have been known to tap into this force when their need, their intent, was great enough. For one who could repel a large cloud of dementors and still have power to spare, well, intent can trump long held rules and beliefs about the limits of magic.

This boy -sorry, _young man_- had intent like nobody's business. His whole life had just gone to shite in a serious way. It didn't even register in his mind that he had just apparated about thirteen thousand kilometers and eight time zones.

He doesn't know how to apparate, you say? That didn't stop him from apparating onto the school roof when he was being chased by that bully of a cousin some years before. You could even say he shot himself into the future considering he went from eleven PM-_ish_ to seven AM-_ish_ and he went from the night before his birthday to the morning of his birthday. Now, control was sadly lacking or he may have gone somewhere full of happiness and sunshine. Lacking that, he may have popped into a warehouse full of military grade ordinance, grabbed some, and popped right back where he had come from to Settle Things.

'Happy _sodding_ Birthday.' The teen thought to himself. 'Not bad enough that my godfather fell through the Veil less than two months ago. Not bad enough that I have a bloody prophecy written about me and He-Who-Shits-On-My-Future. Not bad enough that I have to go back to my uncle's house and get unending abuse heaped onto me for another month. Noooooooooo...'

His ruminations hid the fact that the ground under him wasn't very stable. A small twist of his tape covered trainer on the exposed soil began a small shift in balance. He moved towards one of the pools without really noticing. Just as his balance changed the arguing pair buy the hut took notice of the newcomer.

'The-Headmaster-Which-Is-Infallible has just given me a reason to think that, yes, I can in fact sink deeper into depression than I ever ha-' The boy would have loved to continue angsting but he was interrupted.

"Yamero! Ugokuna!" Barked out the redhead.

At the same time, her companion called out in a different language, "Mr. Customer! Very bad you fall in spring!"

Now, hearing these words shouted from a hundred meters away didn't really upset the teen, but it did cause him to look up. His footing shifted again.

Not good.

"Where am SHITE!"

_- SPLASH -_

_"Oh, too bad. He fall in Spring-Of-Drowned-I'm-Not-Sure-Who-She-Was."_ The portly man commented in Japanese as he and his companion waited for the boy to come back up for air.

_"That one's new to me. How old, then?"_ The redhead inquired. Both seemed to settle on English as it was clear that Mr. Customer spoke it right before he went for a swim.

_"Just last year. I thinking she from Nippon like you but she have yellow hair and blue eyes. She have school ID with her for Tsukino Usagi but she wearing silly dress and not looking just same and I not thinking ID really hers. Amazons paying much gold for her headband and ear rings. They say it very magical."_

Floating at the bottom of the pool, the poor teen had just rebooted his brain to the point of wanting to get back out. Feet digging into the mud at the bottom, he gave a kick and managed to get back to the surface. With a few kicks, the edge of the pool was in reach. A hand reached out, five fingers dug into the rich soil. A second hand came up but as there was something in it, those fingers could not find purchase. He was about to drop the 'root' he seemed to have picked up from the pool bottom when he looked at it. He noticed how un-rootlike and how girly and shiny it looked. Maybe it was worth something? Better just to hold on to it, whatever it was, in recompense for the dunking he just endured.

He moved to stick the shiny rod into his belt like one would a toy sword when he noticed that his clothes were not just big and wet. No. They were now so big on his frame that his shoulders nearly slid through the neck hole of his hand-me-down-from-a-beached-whale t-shirt. And the water was cold too. He's never felt quite so tingly up top before. And come to think of it, down below doesn't feel quite... right... 'ohhh no no no no no...'

He wasn't a he anymore. The bits were all wrong for that now. He was a she. She didn't have short black hair anymore. Her hair was now very long and very blonde.

_"Been there, done that. No t-shirts on sale to show for it. I'll go get her."_ The young woman called to her companion before leaping, _yes leaping_, from her point of origin.

Her leap was superhuman, crossing dozens of meters before she came to rest on the top of a bamboo pole and leapt away again. She hit two bamboo pole tops on her trip before landing gently next to the blonde haired blue eyed girl who seems to have checked out for now. A slender arm wrapped around the Blonde-Who-Lived and held on tight as the redhead leapt back the way she came with Miss Harry Potter in tow.

Both girls soon appeared in front of the man.

"Oh, where you find that!" The guide was both excited at the fact that Miss Potter had pulled another magical item from the new pool and sad that clearly she was going to keep it.

It was time for the speech.

"Mr. Customer, so sorry I not welcoming you proper to Pools of Sorrow, we call them Jusenkyo. That in China. Much magic here, and each pool have own tragic story. You fall in pool, you get curse."

No response from the new girl just yet.

"You fall in Spring-Of-Drowned-I'm-Not-Sure-Who-She-Was. We still working on name for this one. One year ago a girl fall from sky and drown in pool. Now, whoever fall in pool take form of girl when hit with cold water. Simple undo curse though. Just hit with hot water. We show you."

Still no response.

The redhead stepped in front of Mr.- or rather Miss Customer and waited for the man to get some hot water. It only took a minute… hot water was always a useful resource out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by cursed pools. One splash later and there was a bigger fit looking black haired boy where the girl was.

He still looked pretty dazed by his experience. Not that they blamed him one bit. They'd seen it all before.

_-SPLASH-_

"Ow! That's hot you prat!" Finally!

"You're welcome! Welcome to China. I'm Ranma and this here is the Jusenkyo Guide. Still won't tell me his name, go figure. What's your name? Come to think of it, how did you get into the valley without us seeing your approach?"

"Errrrrr..." 'I can't go around telling muggles how I got here. Then again, are they muggles? And where am I? HEY, he said these springs are cursed. Maybe they're not muggles...' "Ranma? You wouldn't happen to believe in.. er.. magic, would you?" 'China?'

"Hello? Aquatransexual here. Just add water and -POOF- titties! Just like you now for that matter. Hell yes magic is real. Gods only know how much my life has been messed with due to curses and magic doodads. Let me tell you, water will actually travel uphill to get to you now. You remember logic? Forget it. Doesn't exist for you anymore."

Ranma seemed to be speaking from experience, and it didn't hurt that Harry already agreed with him on the magic-logic schism. Harry tried his best to pay attention as he worried over his predicament.

'I'm in China? Really?' Okay, so they know about magic. I should still say as little as possible. No matter... They don't need to know that I'll be killing a Dark Lord in the next few years.' Harry, by focusing on the crushing weight of being told that he is a custom made Dark Lord Exterminator, was actually escaping the other crushing weights of Tragic Death and Magic Sex Change. Oh, and why he really blind apparated one third of the circumference of the frickin' planet in the first place. That-Reason-Which-Shall-Not-Be-Named. "Well, my name is Harry Potter. I'm from England and I kind of used magic to get here. You see, I'm a wizard, and I can... kind of... move by magic. Sort of dissapear and reappear somewhere else if I do it right. Not that I know how I got here, exactly. Where am I again?"

Ranma looked a little closer at Harry. He tilted his head, squinted and really focused. His eyes seemed to look at and around Harry. He looked at the treasure Harry pulled out of the water and then down by Harry's waist. That last glance, Harry noted, was right at where his holly and phoenix feather wand rested in a pocket.

"China. You're in China. You're really close to Tibet but pretty far from Beijing or the coast. Mind tellin' me why you chose to use your magic to come here?"

"Well I didn't really. Choose to, that is. I was really upset and absolutely had to get away from where I was. I kind of thought 'anywhere but here' you see." Harry really didn't want to say more about that. He put his hand on the... wand? scepter? In his belt. A vision of soft, round orbs flitted through his mind, but not in a good way. He wasn't supposed to see them from that angle or feel them from the inside like that. "That really happened right? I'll turn into a girl again?"

"I'm sorry to say, but yes, Harry. I won't be splashin' you on purpose, but you may want to get used to bein' blonde soon. I denied my girl side for years and it brought nuthin' but misery to do so. These days I can hardly tell the difference, 'cept in a fight or when dealing with other people. Oh, and bath time. Oh, there's that time of the... look Harry. There's some things you gotta know 'bout bein' a girl part time, but we can save that for latter. You look a bit worn down."

Come to think of it, Harry was a bit knackered. His body still thought it was the middle of the night. 'Perhaps a nap to noon or so. Then... well shite. Where to go now? These two are nice enough, but China? I can't stay here.' Harry started to yawn.

"Look Mr. Customer, you go rest now. In hut, you find two bed. You use smaller one. It no use now my daughter go to Xining for school. She want go to big city. I say, 'You promise not join amazons, you can go to city.' Anyway, you rest now, I wake you for lunch, yes?"

"Yes please. You've been a great help. I'll just have a kip then. I've just got to settle down a bit and maybe things will start to make sense after some sleep." With a quick nod to both the Guide and to Ranma, Harry went into the hut, found the right bed, and got some rest. The other two switched languages and seemed to restart their earlier discussion at twice the speed of their English conversation. They occasionally spared a glance back to the hut. Shortly before lunch was to be prepared, the two made a pact. The other locals… particularly the amazons… were not to know anything about anything. Even if that shiny girlish stick could fetch a high price to the amazons, they were more trouble than they were worth. That and nobody wants an angry wizard.

* * *

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was not a happy Chief Warlock sitting in his office at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. No, his efforts towards the Greater Good were being held back by a petulant child. A child that clearly needed to be reined in further still. It would seem that having the Dursleys as his caretakers clearly wasn't enough. Telling Severus that the boy was spoiled and needed some softening up before he'd be ready for their plan to work wasn't enough. Having the Weasley boy keep all hope of romance away from young Harry and monopolizing his friendship along with Miss Granger wasn't enough. To be honest, Miss Granger wasn't part of the plan, but she was the one lifeline the Headmaster had been willing to let Mr. Potter keep. She kept him alive and in line when it wasn't convenient for Albus to do it himself. She was also very devoted to authority figures, and while that tool Fudge had shaken her beliefs, she still held the opinion that the Headmaster's discharge didn't stink.

'No let him keep Miss Granger as a friend for now. Though he'll have to say goodby to his broom... and his friends from that club of theirs. Oh, and goodbye to Hedwig. Perhaps if Severus needed some potion ingredients from a snowy owl... yes. That would be a fitting gift to apologize for running out on his duties.'

_Flashback_

_July 30th, 1996_

_Harry read, for the umpteenth time, through the parchment that the Headmaster's phoenix had delivered just one hour previous. He knew what day it was; tomorrow was his birthday. Surely rotting in Durskaban for a whole month with no-one to talk to and nothing productive to do was penance enough for his sins. His friends had contacted him... sort of... but the lack of useful information about what Voldemort was up to or how he could use this supposed power-he-knows-not was turning Harry into a total Emo. This letter from Dumbledore was his one ray of hope. Maybe he would actually get out of here tonight. Maybe he would have a decent night's sleep with no dreams of death and torture. Harry would much rather spend the rest of the summer at the Burrow. At this point, even Malfoy Manor was starting to look like a good option._

_Letter reading number umpteen plus one:_

_Harry, My Boy,_ _I trust that you have been able to recover from your recent ordeals and are now ready to plan for the future. I shall be visiting you this evening. Please be ready for travel._

_Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore_ _Headmaster, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry_ _Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorcerer, Chief Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confederation of Wizards_

_Uncle Vernon had grabbed Harry's trunk as soon as they had arrived and locked it in the cupboard under the stairs during a heated rant about freaks and propriety. There were no bruises involved but he had a face full of uncle spittle by the end of it. Had he bothered to wipe it off then that act of defiance would have invited the pounding. Harry informed his uncle of the Headmaster's message only to be told that his freak stuff would be released when Harry left for good and not one second before._

_Harry had been waiting impatiently through the evening meal. It was a meal he prepared not that he would be allowed to taste any of it. For whatever hateful reason his aunt and uncle were trying to starve the freakishness out of him yet again. He waited impatiently through cleaning the dishes, alone, and then waited impatiently as the Dursleys went to bed in turn. He could hear Vernon muttering about freaks not delivering on promises as the enormous man walked through the upstairs hall._

_Harry had almost fallen asleep when he heard a knock at the door. _

_'Please God, don't let it end like this.' Even Harry was not pleased that he would have visitors at this time of night, so he silently opened his mouth to yell along with his uncle's response._

"_Freak! You will see who is at the door and then you will watch as I crush your freak things and burn them one at a time!" _

_If Dumbledore weren't the Leader of the Light, Harry would swear that the Headmaster must have done this to him on purpose._

_He stumbled down the stairs as quickly as his sleep addled mind would allow. Opening the door, he saw Headmaster Dumbledore standing there on the porch, wearing his usual tacky robes and a smile. 'No one should be that happy at this time of night.' thought Harry. 'Let's see him smile when uncle Vernon gives him a proper greeting.'_

"_Harry, my boy. I trust you are ready to go?" The Headmaster looked to Harry's feet for signs of a trunk only to be disappointed._

_There was a bit more excitement after that, Harry was sure of it, but the dull ache of a head wound mixing with the slight tingle of recently cast healing magic seemed to dull his memories. 'Did Vernon hit me?'_

_Harry looked down at his open trunk sitting by his feet, wand in hand. His feet were on the front porch at the moment. He placed his wand in his pocket and closed the trunk. He looked to the Headmaster, ready to ask about how they got outside. _

_Twinkling eyes bored into his own._"_A delightful man, your uncle. He cares about you very much." _

_Yes well… maybe his uncle wasn't such a bad bloke after all. The Headmaster could be trusted about such things, right? Harry desperately wanted to please the Headmaster. He would know what to do. He was the grandfather that Harry never knew._

_As the Headmaster turned away to summon his familiar, Harry's thought process ground to a halt. 'Wait, what?' Harry turned his back to Albus and sat on his trunk. He had to get his head clear._

"_Headmaster, where are we going?" Please say the Burrow, pretty please with snitches on top._

"_We have urgent business to attend to. Now is the time to fully embrace the power Voldemort knows not. Surely you must be eager to strike a blow against Voldemort after the school year you just experienced, yes?"_

"_Of course, sir."_

"_We will go to Professor Snape's home, which is where you will be spending the rest of your summer." _

_Fawkes appeared about thirty yards off in a puff of flames and began to circle the two wizards._

_'Snape's home? Now? How am I supposed to embrace love in the greasy git's home. How am I supposed to live through to sunrise for that matter?' "Sir, I don't understand. How am I to embrace that power with the one man who hates me more than Voldemort?"_

"_He doesn't hate you Harry. Far from it in fact. I dare say that he sees some of your mother in you."_

_'I dare say you are mentally handicapped.' Harry knelt forward and stared at the ground. He didn't want to open himself up to legilimency… if that is indeed what had clouded his mind just a minute before._

"_You see, Harry, I have taken it upon myself as your Magical Guardian to prepare a betrothal contract. It will be through marriage that you learn to love and finally bring Voldemort to heel."_

_"M__arried! You picked my _wife_ for me?" Through his shock, Harry briefly wondered which witch had been chosen by the Headmaster for this sacrifice. If it were Ginny or even Hermione then maybe this could work. Or Susan... even Luna… but wasn't dating and courtship and free will supposed to be part of marriage? This contract better not be for Pansy Parkinson._

"_Not quite, Harry. I believe Tom has been intimate with Mrs. Lestrange, perhaps with the wives of a few of his more loyal followers as well." The old man paused and scratched at his beard for a moment. "As the prophesy states, Harry, we are to employ the power he knows _not_ meaning that love between a man and a woman may not qualify. You, Harry, are to bond with Severus. You shall take his name as the subordinate member of the union. We have been brewing a rare and rather remarkable potion which will allow you to bear an heir to the Snape line. Yes, I'm quite sure that Tom has done nothing remotely like this." Fawkes landed on the Headmasters shoulder. "Now Harry, come to me so that we can move you to your new home. There we can finalize the contract and provide you with the potions necessary to ease your transition. Do this, young man, and I assure you that your parents' deaths will soon be avenged."_

_-snap-_

_That was the sound of the Boy-Who-Lived snapping. Depression flooded his frame. Anger poured through every artery and vein. Intent. The overwhelming intent to _just go. _To go far, far away. Chanting 'anywhere but slytherin' had worked once before and now his very soul rebelled against the sheer horror of becoming Mrs. Harry Snape._

_Headmaster Dumbledore noticed that Harry had gone still. This was not a good thing in his estimation. No, this had to be dealt with before the boy could think for himself. He began to close the distance between the two wizards and force the issue when, with a soft -pop-, his mark had up and left._

"_Not happy. I'm not happy at all." 'Bugger, how could Harry refuse his destiny?_

_End Flashback_

"Mr. Potter, I am afraid that I cannot allow you to run from your destiny, from your husband-to-be." The Headmaster began to put ink to paper, writing a letter and also filling each line with enchantment after charm after compulsion. "Yes. That should do it. Hmmmm... Mr. Potter, you will do this for the Greater Good, and I am confident that, in time, you will thank me for my efforts. Everyone does, in time." He stood, drying the ink with a simple wandless charm, and made the note ready for transport.

"Fawkes!"

**End Chapter**

REV 7/2012


	2. Turn Around Bright Eyes

**Chapter Two: Turn Around Bright Eyes**

July 31st, 1996, Lunchtime

Harry Potter woke up to the smell of simple food. He could tell that there was fish involved but there was no trace of any seasonings that he could identify. Clearly this was not the Dursley's house. What else could could he determine without opening his eyes? He was in an unfamiliar bed and he had morning wood. That first bit was disturbing and that second bit was... not something he cared to deal with right now. What _else_ could he determine without opening his eyes? Was that the sound of birds chirping? That was certainly not something that he heard much of on Privet Drive. Not locked away inside, anyway.

Maybe it was just a dream. Maybe he was waking up in another magical household like the Weasley's home. Well, no use in putting it off any longer. He opened his eyes.

'Crap, China. Not a dream.'

He got up, ran his fingers through his hair, and glanced about for a water closet.

'Crap, _rural _China. How does one use the loo here?'

He walked past a male Ranma, who seemed to be tending to lunch over a simple stove, and stepped outside. Outside into a light drizzle. She stopped. She briefly considered holding it in until becoming male again but apparently _she _couldn't hold water as well as _he _could. And just what did you pinch shut as a girl anyway? And this outfit just didn't cut it outside of 4 Privet Drive. Harry looked around for a clue as to how it was done out in the middle of nowhere, Qinghai, China. The guide seemed to divine the witch's need and pointed to a trail off to the side of the hut.

Fine, whatever. 'I may look like a prissy princess but I've dealt with worse.'

Ten minutes later, Miss Potter returned to the hut shivering from the cool rain. Her skin was pale and as her shirt was not hiding anything.

'Um, no. I have not dealt with worse. I have only dealt with Just-As-Bad-In-Another-Way. I was really looking and I still don't know where the urine came out from.'

Some Gryffindor, too afraid to touch his... her own bits. Purely for scientific purposes, really.

"Umm, Ranma?" Harry called out.

"Sumimasen." Ranma was a bit preoccupied with the last dish. Harry clearly didn't know enough Chinese to get by unless he was ordering take-away for the Dursleys.

"Mandarin or Cantonese?"

"Ara? Er.. Sorry?"

"My mistake. Are you speaking in Mandarin or Cantonese. I'm afraid I don't know much about the area." Harry was surethat if he focused on the whole 'I'm in China' issue, then he – she – could pretend her other problems didn't exist. For a little while, at least.

"Neither. That was Japanese. I'm from Nippon, what you call Japan."

"Oh, sorry."

"When you hear me and the guide, that will likely be some Mandarin, plus some local dialects mixed in for fun. The locals are really a diverse lot."

And with that, lunch was served. Harry hadn't eaten with chopsticks before, but he'd seen it on telly once or twice, so with a little help he figured it out. Harry was actually impressed with the food. Local fish fresh from the nearby stream, rice, vegetables, water. That was it. She felt... good. 'Oh! I should ask about clothes.'

"Ranma?"

"Yes?"

"I don't suppose you could lend me a change of clothes? What I came in with just isn't working what with the curse and me being in China and all of that." She held out the collar of her shirt temporarily pulling the fabric off her... nipples... and hiding them from view. Dropping the collar, a small but noticeable amount of cleavage made itself known. The nipples showed up again too.

"Sure! I got a set that should be just about your-"

_-FWOOOSH-_

Fawkes had arrived.

Not only that, but Fawkes just flamed in from nowhere just behind the guide's head in full view of Harry and Ranma. Harry jumped up in surprise. Ranma jumped up in righteous furry.

"Twice Damned Phoenixes! Burn in the Hell of the Horny Dragon!"

And with that proclamation, he whipped both hands out causing a pair of clear pressure waves to shoot through the air between him and the magical bird. Both hit the unfortunate familiar and cleanly quadrisected the immortal avian. Fawkes burst into flame, burning through the parchment he had been carrying, and left six to eight feathers which floated down to the floor of the hut.

"H- how?" Harry stammered.

Ranma looked between his young guest and the red-gold feathers fluttering to the ground.

"That's a Saotome Family martial arts technique. Very high end of course. I use my ki to form vacuum blades in the air. Those things are crazy sharp."

The advanced martial arts technique might as well have been magic for all Harry knew, but damned if it wasn't effective.

"Score! You should pick up those feathers, Ranma. Phoenix feathers make for good wand cores. My wand actually has a feather core from that same phoenix you just chopped into bits. See?" With that, Harry pulled the wand out of her pocket and showed her new new friends the wand that has saved her life on more than one occasion.

Harry eventually did ask Ranma about his adverse reaction to immortal birds. Seems the martial artist has bad memories involving a group of phoenix people and their God-king. Seems they were real pricks... drowned Ranma's girlfriend (implied, not stated) even though the girl seemed to recover. Then the bastards tried to kill the same girl again. Ranma changed the subject before they got too far down that path.

* * *

In his office in a tower at Hogwarts, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, who loved his many titles even more than he loved his potion laced candies, sat and brooded. On a perch off to the side, his much diminished familiar stared in his direction as Albus stared right back at him.

"Yes, but I don't see him in your memory, Fawkes. You _are _sure he was there?"

Said phoenix still didn't have the strength to sing, let alone bark single note answers. He just continued to stare.

"Well it would serve the boy right if Tom went and found him first. Maybe Harry will pull off yet another miraculous escape? Merlin knows he can't win outright until I have all the pieces in place."

The bird seemed to drop it's shoulders and look away.

"I'm very sorry Fawkes. I would have thought that Asians would have given you a better reception than that."

More silence from the bird.

"Well, you'll be feeling better soon. What say you go flash over to Miss Chang when she comes back to Hogwarts and dump her into Black Lake when nobody's looking?"

Fawkes actually seemed to like the idea. Phoenixes may be beings of the Light, but they've been known to be spiteful before and have long memories.

* * *

The rain stopped. Excellent.

A male Harry Potter stepped out of the hut wearing a slightly worn white tang and black drawstring pant outfit finished out with his repaired trainers. Ranma had gotten bored inside and took Harry's shoes for some Anything Goes Leatherwork practice. They still looked ratty but they were now quite comfy and the soles were first rate. And the tape was pulled free too. The shoes looked like real shoes.

"Say, Ranma, where can I learn that wandless ki magic fighting you pulled against the phoenix? I've got a bit of a Dark Wizard problem back home." 'I really hope that is something I can learn before going back. Almost nobody does anything wandless back home and I can imagine what an advantage that would be in a fight.'

"So sorry to disappoint, but that was not magic. I channeled my ki into a physical attack. And before you ask, ki is... well many things but for now we will simply call it life force."

"Is ki your soul then?"

"Well, your soul may be made of ki I suppose, but you can generate ki and release it. We all do it all the time, but I am not building and breaking my soul in doing so."

Harry had a light bulb go off over his head. That was followed closely by a second one related to the odds that when a pureblood English wizard has an idea, a lumos was probably cast over his head. But back to the first idea. "You're a martial artist then. You're not a wizard at all?"

"Bingo! Magic loves to piss in my ricebowl, but I've never had active control over the stuff. Now, after all my run-ins with magic, I can feel the stuff from a distance. Almost smell it really. The pools are bathed in it. You stand out. Your wand has some soaked into the wood grain. And that sparkly toy you pulled out of the water... well that thing just screams power even more than the pools themselves."

Harry pulled the object in question back out of his belt where he'd held it like a toy sword. It was a rod, or maybe a scepter, longer than any wand he's seen to date. It was vaguely sword like, if a three to five year old girl were allowed to design one. At least his holly and phoenix feather cored wand looked manly enough. Well, a wizard would think his wand was manly. A muggle would see it and still think him a poof for even having a wand no matter how finely crafted it was. The scepter had a jewel and wing theme to it with lots of pink and gold bits. The wings pointed up and away from the cross guard and the cross guard curved down to connect back to the pommel. Instead of a blade, there was a sparkly crystal shaft. A separate jewel setting sat where the sword point would be. Well, a little girl would think this a fearsome weapon indeed but Malfoy would only risk his death of laughter.

But then, Ranma did say it screams power.

Harry pulled out a matchstick, set it on the table, and then reviewed his very first transfiguration lesson with Professor McGonagall. 'No. No change at all. How about a fire spell?'

_-fwoosh-_

'Ahhhh... transfiguration is a no, but charms could work.' He walked outside to the edge of the forest, followed by Ranma. He saw a tree stump twenty meters away.

"Reducto!"

Magic did launch itself at the tree stump, but it wasn't nearly what his own wand could do to the same target.

"Oh well, better clean my mess." One last jab at the stump. "Reparo."

Well damn! The stump went and grew a whole new tree! Okay, so maybe the stump probably belonged to a monster of a tree back in the day, but a twelve foot sapling is nothing to laugh at.

"This thing really could come in handy some day. I'll have to play with it some more later. But we got off track, Ranma, my point was going to be that maybe you could train me up a bit. I know I'm not going to be a black belt any time soon, but surely anyone who can cut up a fire-bird without touching it has advice worth listening to."

"I doubt you would want to go through what I've been through to get where I am, Harry."

Harry couldn't hold back a snort after that one. He saw Ranma arch an eyebrow in challenge. "You don't know how many times I've thought that about the prats that want my life."

"Can you see a game of 'my scar's bigger than your scar' coming?"

Harry nodded back.

"Game on then... Okay, when I was four or five, Baka Oyagi, or Idiot Dad to you, took me away from my mother and began a ten year training trip. By the end of it I nearly forgot I had a Mom."

"Yeah? Well, when I was just a babe in diapers, a Dark Lord killed my Dad, killed Mum as I watched and then bounced a killing curse off my head."

"I'm not near done, Harry. Next, our training trip skipped all of the 'soft' dojos. If it wasn't over the top, lethal, immoral, illegal or all of the above, Oyaji didn't bother with such weak luxury. If I couldn't beat him in a dinner time battle, I didn't eat."

"I spent from one to eleven in the cupboard under my uncle's staircase being worked like a slave by him, my equally hateful aunt and their spoiled son. Prats hated magic, hated my parents and hated me." 'Beat that.'

"Growing bigger wasn't enough either, Oyaji cheated like others breathe. And there's how we got the food in the first place. He taught me a game where I took food from strangers. If they caught and beat me, then I lost that round and he punished me. If I got away then I won."

"Are you eleven years old yet?" Harry felt a guilty pleasure in knowing that someone else had a suck ass childhood. It wasn't just him.

"Nope." 'I'm just getting' started kid.' "Well I'll keep this part short. Between six and sixteen, while beating me flat pretty much every day, Oyaji manages to incur great debt in my name, I get no long term friends, he collects not less than a dozen marriage contracts in my name, get us both wanted by authorities in at least 5 countries and enrages several noble clans and Yakuza families. You'd like and example, right?"

Another nod.

"Let me teach you about the Neko-ken. When I was six, Oyaji used this _wonderful _training technique in which the student, that's me, gets tied up in foods that cats would like and chucked bodily into a pit full of starving cats. It's supposed to unlock this ultimate warrior inside you or something. Didn't work the first time. Or the next few either. Finally, I snap one of those times getting all mauled and eaten, and sorta... _become_ a cat. On the plus side, when I go cat, it's like a super boost of speed and I can cut through steel like it was paper. But that don't beat the negatives. I got a bad fear of cats, and when I do use the technique, I got zero control of my actions. All instinct. Damn. I feel bad just rememberin' that." Maybe this wasn't such a fun game after all.

Harry's turn. "I'm it then? Right. I first learned I was a wizard just after my eleventh birthday. I was invited to attend a school of magic, the same one my parents went to. 'But wait', I say. 'I thought my parents were jobless freaks who died while driving drunk one night.' 'No,' the half-giant sent to get me replies, 'you're parents were killed by a Dark Lord. They were magical and all around good people.' Not only that, but seeing as how the Dark Tosser's spell bounced off me and got him instead, the Magical World worships me like I was royalty. Well, the ones that weren't dark families anyway. But as you seem to know, Ranma, Fate is a fickle bitch. The leader of the light decides that I'll be safe from retribution if I live with family because of special magics from Mums' blood and sacrifice. Not that it protects me from my magic hating relatives. Anyway, despite being a really famous eleven year old, I almost die at least three times during that first year of school. It's the last one which is the worst. A professor tries to kill me, but I end up killing him instead. Sadly that's not the first time I kill, though usually it's evil beasties and not people, even if they are dark bastards."

Ranma couldn't leave the 'kill somebody' card unplayed, even if this game was too heavy to continue much longer. Looks like it was time to add a bit more to his earlier story about why he hated phoenixes.

"Saffron was the God-King of Phoenix Mountain. Ruler of the Phoenix tribe, half bird, half man and all trouble. I didn't want to kill anyone. Really. He just, he killed the girl I loved. Well that's not completely true. She was close enough to dead that I couldn't tell the difference. I cut him up like I did that flaming chicken earlier. Akane, that's her name... Akane comes back to the land of the living. Yay me. Then Saffron does too. Turns out he's got enough phoenix in him that the whole dying and getting reborn thing happens to him like clockwork."

Harry doesn't recognize the names, but the feeling is something he knows from his own past. "We both won the lottery for happy childhoods, didn't we?"

"You got that right. Okoay! Enough of this depressing male bonding crap for now! Lunch! And then... Jusenkyo curses. Not in general, just gonna teach you bout you're hot sexy girl bod. You are going to learn more about girls than any man should ever know. Even doctors. And then there's the water part of the curse, can't forget that."

"Aguamenti." Harry called, sparkle stick in hand.

The shaft of water hit Ranma dead on. Instant redhead sexpot.

"Very funny Harry. But don't think you'll escape my wrath."

Harry didn't like the look in Ranma's eyes. A good shield spell may come in handy.

"Protego!" Harry smiled.

Ranma snorts.

"It took you almost a whole second to do that. Two seconds if you count raising the stick. I'm not impressed Mister Wizard." Ranma began to draw some ki into her open palm. In less time than it took for Harry to cast his shield, a baseball sized glowing blue orb shot from her hand past Harry to strike a tree about ten feet behind him.

"Ha! Your aim could use some work."

"Not so, kid."

It was then that all of the water shaken free from the branches above thundered down onto the two of them. The protego failed to stop the brief torrent just as Ranma expected. All hail Jusenkyo.

The soaked blonde looked over to her red headed companion and said, "Right, what's for lunch then?"

Lunch was more fish, rice and veggies. No complaints there. Compared to the Dursley's house, this was a gourmet buffet of the highest order. And Ranma could really pack it in too. Harry didn't believe the 'growing girl' line even if those puppy dog eyes were formidable.

As nobody felt like continuing the angst fest so soon after lunch, Ranma began to fill Harry in on the joys of womanhood. Luckily, Harry's Weird-Shit-O-Meter spiked so long ago that feminine hygiene didn't freak him out nearly as much as it did Ranma back in the day. Sure, it was icky, but he'd get used to it. A boy his age needed some exposure to girl-germs anyway. As lunch comes to a close, Ranma ends his 'girls are not icky when they are you' speech, he closes with a parting shot at PMS.

"Really, after living with the curse for about seven years now, the only part of the curse that still feels like a curse is my monthly visitor."

Above Harry's head, a glowing light bulb and a lumos'd wand fight for dominance. "I know a Curse Breaker with loads of experience dealing with things like mummies and pyramids and the like. I could ask him to check up on this Valley and see if he can figure Jusenkyo out. Bill's supposed to be good at his job."

There was a bitter edge to Ranma's smile. "The greatest lesson I have learned since Jusenkyo is that you cannot escape the magic of the curse. Accept that you are now part girl, Harry."

Ranma's blue-gray eyes began to bore into Harry's curse altered crystal blue eyes.

She half whispered the rest, "I can't prove it, not yet anyway, but I have come to believe that Jusenkyo's purpose is to provide balance to those who lack it. I was raised to believe that girls were weak, taught that they were to be subservient to men. I was gonna make my father proud and be a man-among-men. Then we got to Jusenkyo. I went from being almost good enough for Father to being an eternal failure not even good enough to return to Mother."

The bitterness disappeared but a flat, defeated look took it's place.

"I learned the hard way, spent years looking for every cure I heard even the smallest rumor about. I saw magics you could never imagine even more powerful than that rainbow sparkly toy you got there. But it never worked. No cure ever worked for me. If I used the cure it failed. If a cure was guaranteed to work it was snatched from my fingers by the barest of margins. Worse, I could have been cured once, but had to blow the damn cure to pieces to keep Akane from joining me on the boy side of things. Karma can be an evil bitch at times."

Ranma looked to Harry for any visible reaction.

"Sorry, I'm not makin' much sense, am I?" The cursed redhead asked.

Harry thought about it for a minute. What could she come up with in her life that was balanced?

The blonde responded. "My life is seriously out of balance. Even if you forget that I'm nearly miserable enough to just up and kill myself on a bad night, I've got no control over my life and no idea about girls and love and all of that. So I pop myself clear across the biggest land mass on our planet to the very spot you think forces people into balance. And what do you know? I fall in to a magic pool which gives me boobies. It gives me good reason to learn about girls and also gives me a shiny magic stick of power. Oh, and I meet you, someone who has been cursed long enough to keep me from melting under the sheer weirdness. You make sure I don't run off into the wilderness thinking I'll never get my wedding tackle back. Even being here is helping keep my mind off other things... damn. Just reminded my self what was so bad I had to come here in the first place. Bad Harry."

Ranma knew how to get your mind off of things better than anyone alive. Intense physical training.

"Enough of this shit!" She got up, chest bouncing and capturing Harry's attention for a moment. Luckily, Ranma looked away and didn't see the slip. "Let's burn off lunch before I get my mother's hips!" A quick wink to Harry and Ranma was off like a bullet. Harry thought she was fit... for all of three minutes. Two hours later she was hacking out a lung and nearly dead on her feet. She stumbled up to Ranma who finally stopped zipping around like a deranged cricket. As Harry put her hands on her knees, Ranma grabbed Harry firmly about the waist, picked the younger girl up and tossed her into a pool of water.

"Oh, fu-"

_-Sploooosshhh-_

Harry came out of his shock shortly after righting himself in the pool. No knee length blonde hair. No bouncy top or mysterious lower bits. He was in a hot water spring. Nice.

"I find," Ranma started as she dropped into the pool and became a he, "that the best way to end a short hike in the woods is to relax in a hot spring. Wouldn't you agree?"

'Thank any God listening.' Mused Harry as he started to recover from his manic sprinting and the abrupt stop. "I was beginning to worry that I'd be a girl most of the time I was here in the valley.'

Later, there was a filling dinner followed by more story time. Both Harry and Ranma were careful to stay on topic, dragons, without going too dark. Harry elected to ignore the Basilisk due to it's being a bloody great snake and therefore not a dragon. The Hungarian Horntail was good enough to match Ranma's Orochi episode. Ranma was even impressed by the nonviolent victory. Maybe infusing ki into an object, like a broom, could give him a way to fly around. Something to think about after his current project.

Lord Voldemort tried to fill Harry's dreams with pain and misery that night. Maybe if he had been 10,000 km closer and had tried eight hours earlier he could have gotten somewhere. Oh, well. At least he had minions to punish.

**End Chapter**

REV 7/2012


	3. Towing the Company Line

**Chapter Three: Towing the Company Line**

July 31, 1996

Severus Snape was not a happy wizard.

Not that anyone could ever claim to seeing him be happy but he expected to achieve that emotion on this very night. He was supposed to be hurling insults at Potter. He was supposed to be forcing vile and exotic potions down the brat's throat. He was supposed to be breaking the will of the Boy-Who-Lived. And yet, no Potter. Funny, they were in stock not twenty-four hours ago.

Albus was not known for breaking promises. Sure, he broke promises whenever it served his needs but he wasn't known for it. Severus knew the Headmaster would break his promises when he sent the Potters into hiding. Dumbledore knew that as well. There were two possible choices for who could be the boy of prophecy, and they both had to be within striking distance of the enemy in order for one of them to actually trigger the prophecy.

Severus himself watched Ablus as he stood eye to eye with James Potter and promised the greatest protection possible for his family. Albus promised Lily 'She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Referred-To-By-Her-Married-Name' Evans that he would stand between Voldmort and her family if they ever were found out. He even got down on his tetradecagenarian knees and promised _the Insufferable Bra_t, 'Young Harry, you will know great happiness after these dark times have passed us.'

Even with all that, Albus never broke the important promises. Ones to Snape. And Albus had promised to hand Potter over this very night.

It didn't happen. Snape's glorious victory over the thrice cursed Potter males didn't happen as it was promised.

Severus understood that the Headmaster was not dark to twist his words and to lead others to their doom. Severus knew what the Greater Good was. He also knew that the old fool was getting along in years and set in his ways. His Greater Good was a utopia of love and forgiveness, but Magical Britain had yet to achieve this utopia and in order for such a utopia to exist many, many pawns would have to be sacrificed to bring about the right end game.

Pawns were meant to be sacrificed by the king, after all. That was their purpose. You can't expect the king to sacrifice himself and still have your side win the game.

Dumbledore sought to direct his pawns by example, always giving his opponents a chance to 'turn to the light' no matter how dark they were. It just so happened that Dumbledore was better at avoiding a horrific painful death than just about anyone else and as such could not really see the problems inherent in an evil catch-and-release program.

Dumbledore also believed that Death Eaters victims were mostly of the light. That meant that their suffering on this earth would be rewarded in the next Great Adventure. In his mind, it was justifiable to let dozens of souls get an early trip to a happier place if that meant he had a chance to remove the stain of darkness from one or two others. Even if that early trip was not asked for and even if it were not painless. Since Dumbledore would willingly sacrifice just about any light asset to turn dark wizards, Severus could name his terms. Haven't you ever heard a child say 'If only I had a kitty, I'd sleep in my own bed, Mummy?' Guess who didn't sleep in their own bed even after getting a kitty.

Albus would let the Potter men die. Voldemort would let Lily live. It was the perfect plan. After making sure that Albus knew Voldmort knew part of the prophecy, he fully harnessed his Slytherin cunning and insinuated, in front of Black, that no respectable Death Eater would bother with Pettigrew, the little pest, thus helping ensure that the secret would get out.

But even with all that, Snape was left with no Potter to abuse tonight.

"Albus! Where in Merlin's name did that little snot run off to? I should be showing him his proper place in this world at this very moment!"

"Calm yourself Severus," Albus was on his third lemon drop inside of one hour and beginning to feel the potion get over his tolerances for Calming Draught. "His unfortunate accidental magic has put him out of reach for now, but he will soon see that he needs us."

"You promised me! You promised me the boy and everything that belongs to him!"

"And I will make good on those promises. I always have made good on my promises to you, you know." Dumbledore reached into his robes and brought out the Betrothal Contract. He then opened a drawer in his desk and brought out a crystal inkwell filled with red 'ink'. "Mr. Potter has been kind enough to find his way into Madam Pomfrey's care so often that he never really seemed to notice the blood that went missing from his veins on occasion."

With that, the Headmaster signed a credible likeness of Harry's signature in blood on the contract. He would go to Gringott's tomorrow to have the Potter and Black vaults signed over to Severus. It was, in his humble opinion, a small price to pay for keeping a formerly dark wizard in the light where he was destined to be.

* * *

August 1, 1996

Harry woke up to the smell of pork. 'I wonder if they would let me cook one morning. I need to earn my keep if this trip to China is going continue.'

Breakfast was filling and soon the guide left to get supplies from a few of the local towns.

As Ranma began heating up some water for tea, Harry pulled out his wand to cast Scourgify and Evanesco on the dishes. This was good practice and also great fun as the Dursley's had never allowed him to clean their kitchen the freak way. It was very relaxing to be able to just cast magic without doing so for class and without worrying about ministry owls winging in with notices of doom. As the water heated up Ranma watched the magic show, clearly interested in magic that dids not make his life miserable. When Harry finished levitating the clean dishes onto a shelf, Ranma lets curiosity get the better of him.

"Does the magic start in you, or in the wand?"

"It's in me. The wand is just a focus for my magic. It gives me control."

"Do you really need one then? Can't magic be done without a wand?"

"Well, you can do magic without a wand, but not as much, and only the greatest witches and wizards can do anything of use without their wand." With that intro, Harry launches into a much abridged lesson of magical theory for Ranma. They keep up the lesson through cleanup and a walk out to the edge of the Pools. After a brief Q&A session, Ranma has a basic understanding of what they both agree to call Western Magic. He also learns of Harry's progress after seeing a few charms, hexes and other transfigurations being cast on the way outside.

Ranma was deep in thought what he'd just heard . Harry was removed from the 'potential threat' list soon after he got here but now that he's here... "Harry. I've got a challenge for you."

"Brilliant! My wand is at your service."

"Well... the guide and I have been going back and forth over the last year or so trying to figure out the How of Jusenkyo curses. Remember, we're pretty sure the Why is clear. Others may not agree with me on the Why but then they haven't really been able to accept their curses like I have."

"Oh? What's holding the others back then?"

"I may get leered at or groped after I change but some victims have to be careful not to get served up as lunch."

"Lunch?"

"A human-to-human curse is actually kinda rare compared to the other ones. There's spring-of-drowned-cat, pig, duck and so on. Chuck enough people into the springs and you've got a whole zoo plus a full stock of farm animals."

"Sucks to be them."

"Indeed. Count yourself lucky that not only do you still have hands when you change, but you can talk. Ol' P-chan would get angry as hell and then oink up a storm at me." Ranma chuckled some. "That never got old."

Ranma seemed to drift off for a moment. Harry didn't mind really. It was a nice day today and nobody was trying to kill him.

"Yeah, so anyway... we were working on how Jusenkyo does what it does and I thought a genuine wizard might be able to shed some light as to how magic works. Maybe you could help me in an experiment or two."

"Of course. That actually sounds kind of fun." Harry was really liking this. He'd get to do some magic for a good cause. Maybe that's what the Department of Mysteries is actually for. Harry briefly lost himself in a daydream about reversing the Veil and seeing Sirius again.

Harry immediately snapped back to attention when she became the first experiment of the day. Pulling her blonde hair away from her face, she looked over to the smug face of Ranma holding a bucket against his chest.

"Test One: ordinary water on cursed victim. Results: as expected. You see Harry, we have to figure out a number of things about Jusenkyo's magic as opposed to your magic. To do that, you always start with a test base. That's what a scientist I met back home said anyway. Smart guy, even if his daughter freaked me out. I thought normal catgirls were creepy until I met Nuku Nuku. Crazy catgirl android..."

Ranma was mumbling by the end of that line.

"Mind telling me why you are doing this research in the first place? Not that I want out, mind you! I'd just like to know what I'm getting myself into."

"I don't blame you. Maybe after lunch we can do some more story time. I'll show you mine if you show me yours and all that."

"Deal."

"Okay. Short answer: Everyone I know says everything is all my fault. Logically – or what passes for logic for them anyway - I have to fix everything. So that's why I'm here. To learn how to fix everything."

"But, but you said when I asked about the curse breaking that Jusenkyo can't be undone, right? That's what they blame you for, curses right?"

"It's more complicated than that, but yes. And I know that I can't do what they want me to do. If I go back to Japan, to my parents house without a genuine working cure in hand, I'll get booted out of the clan at the very least. Maybe killed outright. I've been zipping back and forth between Japan and China and the America's for years now and still no closer to finding a way to fix things. And before you ask, I'm not giving up. Not even when I know I'm on a fools errand. Honor will not allow it."

"Honor?" Harry once heard some of her primary school classmates talking about ninjas and samurai. Honor was in there but it was more of a 'you have dishonored me and now you must die!' playground game kind of way.

"I know how it must sound to you. I was raised believing in the traditional views of honor. I see the trap for what is is now but honor is hard to abandon when it's all you have."

That hit fairly close to home. "God help me but I know what you mean. It's not honor that ties me though... It's prophecy. There's a Dark Lord back home and damned if I'm not the only living being with the power to defeat him. I thought Divination was rubbish before but now I absolutely loath the subject."

"Divination? Fortune tellers 'n shit?" Ranma looked amused. "I've never liked them either. Anyway, back to how you can help. Me and the guide may know about as much as anyone alive about the Jusenkyo magic, but that doesn't mean much as we can't play with magic ourselves. We've boiled down the spring water and gotten what's called 'curse powder'. The guide sells the stuff to fund his smoking habit. The powders work, but only once per dose and it's not permanent. Now, I know I told you on the first day here to chuck logic, but maybe if we use some here we can learn a few things."

"I got it. Well, you say the powders work only once. So they don't catch all the magic in the water then?"

"That's what I think. I've also tried cooling off the steam to see if the magic stayed with any of the boiled off water. Nope. Just water at that point. Short answer: the minerals which don't get boiled away keep a small amount of the magic and we lose a lot of magic in the process. And that's where we are right now. Guide and me have only been going at it for the past couple of months though. I spent years looking for pre-made cures and you already know how that turned out."

"So how much of this powder do you have?"

Ranma shrugged. "Not much really. There's a lot of time and effort for little gain, really. We have to boil down a lot of water to get even a little bit of the good stuff. You've seen those restaurant salt packets, right? Boil down one barrel of water to fill one of those. That's a lot of water for only a single use curse. Now, the right curse powder sells for big money. You know, like my curse or yours. 'lota perverts in the world."

Harry flinched. It was hard enough for her to deal with her new body without having to think of the likes of Dean or Seamus trying to get her into a broom cupboard. "I can believe that. So, that's how the guide gets supplies? He sells off the powder?"

"Him and every guide before him. Job doesn't officially pay anything but someone has to do it. The locals really don't want Jusenkyo to be forgotten and become even more of a deathtrap then it already is so they help him out sometimes."

"So we need more powder to play with. And maybe we can transfigure some things and toss them in pools." Harry thought that this experiment could end up being pretty entertaining as well as another good opportunity to practice magic in a way that counts in real life rather than in the classroom.

"What for? Why transfigure something first?"

"Well, what happens if you throw a rock in a pool?"

"Still a rock."

"So what happens if you transfigure a rock into a porcupine and chuck the porcupine in?"

Ranma didn't know. That, of course, was the whole point. "Ahhhhhh. Let's try that."

Ranma grabed a porcupine sized rock and set it at Harry's feet. Harry swished and swooshed and said the incantation taught to him.. her.. whatever... by Professor McGonagall a few years back. Just as intended the rock changed into the desired animal. After so many years of hard conditioning Ranma grabbed the critter, heedless of the quills, and with one sharp flick of the wrist sent the mammalian airborne.

_-sploosh-_

"So, which spring did you throw him into?"

"Spring of Drowned Snake"

"Really? Cool." The water, which was beginning to still, began to move again. "Check it out. Still a porcupine."

"Very interesting. Try turning it back into a rock."

Harry reversed the transfiguration and the rock returned to it's natural state. "Okay. Assuming we can do that again, what does it tell us?"

"First, that there is more to Jusenkyo then just falling in. You have to be _alive _when you fall in. Have ki inside of you. It knew the difference between a real living porcupine and a fake non-living one."

"Second," Harry took her turn, subconsciously competing for house points, "Jusenkyo knows the difference between life and magic. That wasn't some muggle robot. That was a magically transfigured animated fake porcupine. If you'd cut it up, it should have kept going before reverting to a rock."

If Ranma noted the word muggle, he didn't show it. "Pity you said you haven't covered human-to-animal transfiguration yet. We could have had you magic my male form and then hit me with some cold water to see if I still changed."

Harry transfigured another porcupine. Ranma chucked it in. Tortoises came next followed by bats, birds and several other fake living things. It always worked the same way. Harry never tried to transfigure Ranma. Too risky. That one experiment would have to wait for another wizard or would have to wait for an older Harry to try again after she had more control and experience.

Then they tried something different. Two something differents, actually. Ranma picked up a rock, but ignored Harry. He charged ki into the rock much like he and his old rivals infused ki into weapons. That technique was a mainstay of his old rivals' fighting styles back when he stayed with the Tendos in Tokyo. He chucked the rock in.

"Bloody brilliant!" They were both more than a little impressed when a rock-snake-thing wiggled up to the edge of the pool. They both stared for a few minutes as the movements slowly died down and the thing slowly lost it's snakishness. After about five minutes, there was a rock at the edge of the pool with no snakishness at all.

"Do it again!"

So they did. Ranma repeated the experiment several more times, each time changing the amount of ki added or the spring that the rock was thrown into. Every single time a creature emerged from the depths of the pools, it looked like a mix between rock and cursed animal. More ki meant a more lifelike creature and a longer life. Still, they all 'died' in the end.

After Harry and Ranma were both sure that the basic rules were consistent, they took it to the next level and started over again. Ranma picked up a rock and charged it with ki. Harry transfigured it into a tortoise. Ranma chucked mini-Gamera into a pool. They should have picked a better pool. Both Ranma and Harry were more than a little shocked when a rock-girl stepped out of the pool and stared at them. She didn't seem to do much, but then how self aware could a rock-tortoise-girl be?

Oh, and she was naked. She had hair the color of the local clay. Her hair color was natural, of course. Her eyes, nails and teeth all had the darker shades of the rock Ranma had chosen while her skin seemed to take on the lighter shades. Yeah, still looking at them, still naked.

"Creepy." Harry was more than a little uncomfortable at being a party to making a naked girl with magic. He tried to transfigure it back into a rock early. He failed. "How much ki did you put in her, compared to the others?"

"Highest level so far but I didn't stress myself. She'll be gone in five or ten minutes."

"I vote we ignore her and go have lunch."

"Seconded."

"Motion carries."

Lunch was a very quiet affair. Rock Girl followed them halfway back to the hut before she slowed and then stopped. They both snuck glances at Rock Girl until she finally disappeared.

They learned two important things from that exercise. One, Jusenkyo magic trumps normal transfiguration. Two, rock girls are majorly creepy.

* * *

Breakfast at the Burrow was not a quiet organized affair. It was disorganized. It was organic. Highly illogical. But then, what would one expect from a purely magical family.

Hermione Granger wanted to lecture Mrs. Weasley on proper organization and efficiency yet she held her tongue. It was one thing for Hermione to lecture Ron and Harry on the illogical and ludicrous things that the boys got into but quite another to lecture an adult... even if they are doing everything bass ackwards without rhyme or reason.

Misses Weasley had apparently could not find the time to read the selection of tomes on time management Hermione had intentionally left open at strategic locations.

Breakfast was made more disorganized than usual due to a part-veela guest, the Beauxbatons Tri-Wizard Champion. Fleur Delacour had somehow become romantically linked to the eldest Weasley son Bill. From the outset, Hermoine was horrified that the only female champion was following such a traditional life path. Surely such a part-veela champion with her popularity could do great things to advance the cause of witches in the backwards world of magical Europe. But, no. Just out of school, she appeared to have found herself a successful older man that she could lie back and make babies for. 'Honestly. Well, what do you expect from the French?'

Headmaster Dumbledore poped in through the floo.

'If only that one were one hundred and thirty years younger.' Hermione thought to herself. Were the Headmaster-Supreme Mugwump-Chief Warlock young enough, Hermoine might have been willing to follow the part-veela's example. Nope, no hypocrisy there. The Know-It-All of Gryffindor does not have an authority fetish so stop asking.

Maybe he has a great-great-grandson? She should look into that.

Harry and Ron were on both right on the edge of 'something more' until Hermione could get a positive ID of the next Albus Dumbledore. Really if Harry would just take her side over Ron just once when it really mattered, she'd be all over him. The Headmaster is clearly grooming her close friend but Harry continued to ignore good advice and kept slipping ever further down Ron's path of mediocrity. If only something would happen to shake Harry free of his current path...

And then there was Ron 'emotional-range-of-a-teaspoon' Weasley. Every evening she logically separated him from her future before settling in for sleep. Bother if he doesn't always find his way back into her thought process by sunup. It must have been the Harry connection. Please Merlin don't let her be attracted to the prat.

The Headmaster stepped through the chaos that is the Weasley breakfast rush and, after a few greetings to the side, came right to Miss I'll-Be-A-Good-Head-Girl-I-Promise. Her back straightened as he approached.

"Miss Granger, I trust your morning has been a pleasant one?"

"Yes, Headmaster. Thank you ever so much for asking. Will we be going to get Harry today? Surely he's done grieving in private by now? I have been reading quite a lot this summer about psychology and End of Life issues and I'm quite certain that he needs time with close friends."

Albus just allowed his eyes to twinkle in her direction. He knew her better than to think she were finished.

"That's assuming we can get past his anger at being left alone in the first place. Honestly, he goes into isolation every summer with relatives that don't treat him at all well and well after last summer... after last summer he's not likely to be happy with being left in the dark again and I can only tell him that his headmaster knows best only so often before it becomes a negative emotional trigger even if you do know whats best, sir."

"Thank you for caring so much about young Mr. Potter, Miss Granger." The Headmaster returned.

You didn't need to know legilimency to see that the compliment was doing exactly what it intended to do. Hermione was practically glowing red and looking at the floor. Before she could get over her approval induced euphoria and start another logic train, the Headmaster chose to take charge.

"Miss Granger, I have need of your intimate knowledge of Harry's way of thinking, as he's done something rather impetuous."

The Chief Warlock needs _her_ help. The affect on her was better than sex. Well, she assumed it was better than sex... she hadn't actually had sex to compare them yet, now, had she? His words, while not replacing every conversation at the breakfast table, did get attention.

"I'd love to help, Sir. What has Harry done? Did he not come with you today?"

"No, Dear." A personal endearment from Albus Dumbledore. She experienced nirvana.

"I went to his aunt's house the evening before his birthday in order to move him to a different location. One where he could finally grow into the role he is to play in the Dark Lord's downfall which would also ensure his future in a post-Voldemort world."

Hermione had the sign she'd been waiting for. She saw the future. Mrs. Hermione Jane Potter worked for her. Their monogrammed towels would have the same letters. Perfect. Operation Potter 03: Bench Weasley could be pulled out of mothballs and revised in as little as three days.

Albus almost didn't want to do this to the poor girl in public but the information had to be obtained and her face would be priceless.

"If you were Harry, and your godfather recently passed away in your presence, and your Headmaster informed you that you would be spending the rest of the summer in Professor Snape's care, and you chose to apparate somewhere rather than listen to your elders, where would you go?"

Hermione froze solid. There was no sound in the house. Behind her, the youngest two redheads turned white as all of the blood drained from their faces. "Oh, Bother."

The noise returned with a vengeance as everyone save the broken girl voiced their opinions on Harry's disappearance and Harry's future lodging. Ten minutes later, the Headmaster stopped waiting for Hermione to come around and just pulled all the useful information he could find from her mind. It was a disappointing list; he already knew most of her better ideas on where to search and just didn't care how Harry looked in his... wait, Harry does look rather fetching in his boxers after a shower. Albus was going to keep that one.

Otherwise, oh bother indeed.

Before heading off to Gringotts, Albus warned the house residents not to go spreading the news about Harry around. Not that his waring would keep them from talking. He knew Severus would be telling Tom a version of their tale soon enough.

The Headmaster had also completely ignored any entreaty to send Harry to the Burrow or to Grimmauld Place or even back to Privet Drive. No, he would be heading to Snape's home for the Greater Good. They didn't need to know Harry had crossed whole continents upon being told _why_ he was going there in particular. Albus could admit to himself that even mentioning the reason to Harry was a bad idea and this whole episode could have been avoided if he had just kept quiet until Harry was safely in Severus's clutche- er, care.

This was exactly why Albus always kept all his plans carefully hidden lest the common wizard and witch decide that they didn't like what he had planned for them. Just this once Albus thought that there was no way young Harry would be able to get away... and he so wanted to see the look on the boy's face before actually going to Snape's home... and so he let the kneazle out of the bag too soon and Mister Potter had to spoil everything.

Having Miss Granger and the Weasleys know that Harry disobeyed his Headmaster was enough for now. Miss Granger would be a force to be reckoned with when Mister Potter finally showed himself.

Smashing all her dreams like that. Bad Harry.

* * *

A blonde and a redhead sat together at the edge of the Pools of Sorrow, ready for the next experiment.

Ranma continued ki infusing rocks and assorted material for Harry to transfigure before giving it all a magical swimming lesson and the results continued to follow Rock Girl's lead. Afterwards they started re-infusing and re-transfiguring items which had already been cursed. Oddly anything that had been cursed before remembered the old curse and still had it.

After another stretch of experimentation, the two took a short break. Of course, taking a break by Ranma's standards meant doing a few relaxing aerial kata while Harry pulled out the Scepter of Prissiness to play around with it. She started working through her spells, first year then second and so on. Like before, the crystal shaft had no talent for transfiguration. Charms were back to normal strength though. Maybe being a girl had something to do with it.

Then she pointed the scepter once again at her mess in the clearing and incanted, "Reparo."

Oh. My. God.

Ranma was half-way through a thirty meter jump when she suddenly impacted a tree that wasn't there before. A twenty meter tree in a forest of twenty meter trees that simply weren't here not half a second ago. The tree-to-the-head still did not mask the huge wave of _something _that just blew by her position.

Ranma quickly bounded over to Harry's last known location to see what in Hades just occurred. The red head found the blonde staring distractedly into the new forest while loosely swinging the scepter off one pinky.

"What did you do?" Ranma asked.

Harry didn't move for a minute. Then she slowly brought the scepter up to look at it. She reoriented towards a patch of old stumps and diseased trees and did it again. "Reparo."

"Holy shit, Harry!" Holy shit indeed. It worked. Again.

"I hardly felt that."

And she hadn't. She really hadn't put much power into that at all.

"I don't understand... I mean... there are legendary enchanted items back in the Wizarding World but I think I would have heard about a crystal wand that could raise forests from stumps..."

"Well, why don't we think about that during a little run, then?"

Physical effort always seemed to be Ranma's answer to a good logic puzzle. It was the redhead's way to get her thoughts together. Harry was so out of it that she nodded her head and fell in behind Ranma for a bit of exercise. They stuck to physical training for the rest of the day to allow that feat of raw power to properly settle in their minds.

Not far away, important people in three local kingdoms stayed up to the early morning hours discussing what that Power they felt was, where it was and what to do about it.

In the island nation of Japan, a green haired woman ignored her dinner guests for a moment to look off to the west. She knew this would happen. She wasn't needed yet, but she would be ready. Soon.

* * *

At Gringott's, Albus Dumbledore was not getting what he wanted. He was welcomed properly. They went back to a private office, per his request. Greetings were exchanged not that Albus particularly cared as he didn't view the Goblins with half the respect that Harry gave them. Still, that meant he did care about them a bit more than the average wizard, who for the most part would rather the warrior-bankers not exist. Then he pulled out the 'Betrothal Contract'. They looked it over. Then they did a few scans. Then they looked at it some more.

Dumbledore may not have particularly cared for Goblins but he did wait patiently. He was no fool.

"We cannot accept this contract." The head Goblin announced and promptly tore the document in half.

"What?" Albus barely kept the anger from reaching his face. "Was the wording not correct? Was it signed in the wrong way?"

"Look, Wizard." The next Goblin in line responded. "We can tell the difference between blood taken unknowingly and blood willing given. Didn't think we Goblins had that kind of magic, did you? This 'contract' is worth less than the parchment it's written on, and I do believe that the next time Mr. Potter enters our bank he will be informed of this meeting."

"This is a mistake. I am the boy's legal magical guardian and the contract is valid. The replacement contract I bring tomorrow will be accepted." Albus allowed some of his magical strength to slip free and fill the room. That should cow them.

Sadly for him, it did not.

"No, Headmaster, we will accept no such replacement document. You buried the Potter Will in the Wizarding legal system, but Goblin's were present when the document was signed into magical law. Whatever you say or do outside of these doors, we have no say over. But you do NOT tell us what to do inside of our own business! Good Day Sir!" This was a Good Day Sir backed by the growl of a guard and the barest hint of live steel.

"Very well then. I shall take this issue up in the Wizengamot." Albus had many legal avenues to pursue. Many illegal ones too.

"You do that."

* * *

There was much back and forth at that night's Order of the Phoenix meeting. It being one of the first that George and Fred were allowed to attend did in part contribute to this as Molly had a lot to say about her babies becoming members. The excitable woman attempted to add a rule into the Order's regulations limiting the maximum number of Weasley family members that could serve to two. Needless to say, she was shot down on any motion she introduced. The Order needed fresh blood.

The real fireworks didn't start until Dumbledore began to outline what happened to Harry. Or, it would be better to say, when he began to outline what he wanted them think happened to Harry. Dumbledore's presentation ignored the whole 'Harry has to catch for Snape and get preggers' angle. Dumbledore was still working is 'I really didn't know that was going to happen' angle along with a 'he completely misread my intentions' defence.

Honestly, Albus didn't know how Harry could refuse such a hot piece of man meat like Professor Snape. He's got both the Dark and the Professor things working for him. If only Albus were one hundred and twenty years younger, he'd so go there, so what was Harry's problem?

Albus almost had hope for himself with Miss Granger until he read her mind. Too old indeed. Perhaps some creative polyjuice usage was in order. After all, Molly still thought Arthur was her first and only. Thanks to polyjuice she would never know that her whole marriage was based on an encounter with a Headmaster who had just gone through a very tough week and needed to release some stress by dabbling in potions-play.

And with magic what it was, he was not acting in any way out of line with the Wizarding World as a whole either. If the truth didn't please you then swish and flick and a new truth replaced it double quick. Albus knew of several British magical marriages that were based on sexual encounters that never happened. By using the school spying enchantments Albus had even been keeping a list of how many students and professors were intimate with each other. Not only was it fun to watch but the blackmail and manipulation opportunities were limitless. Pity that Lockhart had the memory wipe. Dumbledore had more blackmail material on him than any three other professors combined. Lockhart even outperformed Aurora who was more into student teacher relationships than her studious persona would have one believe. It was always the quiet ones, after all. The pensive memories Dumbledore had pulled from a few of her students were some of his favorite recreational viewing.

The Headmaster spent the rest of the meeting weaving his preferred view of what Harry did into the discussion. Yes, his initial apparition was free of influence, but what could have happened when Harry met foreign magicals, two of them very sexually appealing for a wizard his age? What an immature uncooperative boy he is. Anyway, Harry is a prat and if he comes back to England you should scold him soundly after alerting the Headmaster. Dismissed.

Shortly after dinner, Gred and Forge held court with the other teens in their old bedroom at the Burrow.

"So your saying that Harry was kidnapped?" Hermione queried. It didn't quite match what the Headmaster told her earlier.

"Dumbles didn't come out and say it..."

"... he left everyone to make their own conclusions."

Ron didn't seem to see Hermione's point. "What can we do about it if he's in China anyway?"

"Well, our dear fire-bird friend tried and failed to get Harry back.. "

".. and didn't give the old man enough information to setup a portkey."

"Not that anybody's ever tried to portkey between here and China anyway."

"And those two witches _were _wicked hot."

"And how do you know what they look like anyway?" Hermione asked the twins after their rapid-fire speak.

"It's a little known fact that cameras can be taken into pensieves. How else do you think Playwizard gets all of those pictorial essays?" Fred, or was it George, answered.

"I hadn't heard that. Really?"

"No. Nymphadora's a metamorph, so the Headmaster took her into his pensive for a closer look and she comes out posing as the wizard and witches in turn."

Hermione scowled at the joke. "That doesn't sound any better but at least I know Tonks can do it."

"Tonksie didn't get starkers like we begged, but even wearing her clothes they were quite the little hotties. Red had curves better than Lavender and the blonde had the face of an angel."

"Are you insinuating that our Harry went to China for sex? He could have gotten that here!" Hermione shouted heatedly.

Ron looked up for a minute. "Here 'England' or here 'this room'?"

Oops.

Both Ginny and Hermione were fighting back blushes but Ginny's next comment got things going again.

"Of course she meant England, prat. Even when he was considered to be the Heir of Slytherin... and only twelve... I heard more than one group of witches plotting to deflower the boy." She wasn't about to say that she led one of those groups, "Really, if you and Hermione here didn't keep such a tight leash on him, I dare say he'd be a father several times over already."

The girls were still too preoccupied with their blushes to notice Ron's self satisfied smirk. The twins both saw it but elected not to act now in front of the girls.

"Back to the Order meeting.."

"none of the Order members have the time or contacts to go..."

"prancing about in the wilds of China, so the only thing that Dumbledore can do is work his ICW contacts about it."

Hermione saw that there really was nothing that they could do considering the sheer distance involved unless Fawkes healed up from whatever that one witch pulled on him.

"Well, I need to get some books." There was a lot of snickering at this, and knuts did change hands. "With any luck, Harry can keep himself healthy long enough to either get rescued or do something amazingly stupid yet successful."

"Like get the witches in a three-way!"

"Fred!"

"No, I'm Fred!"

"George!"

"We're cheering for you Harry!"

"Honestly!"

* * *

Voldemort's inner sanctum was a very dark and foreboding place. It was dark no matter what time of day you happened to come upon it.

Unless you were an inner circle Death Eater, or were summoned by Him or His inner circle, then to know this much was a death sentence, if you were lucky. It was a promise of weeks of torture before death if you somehow had the misfortune to appear there against your will.

"Severus, report."

"Yes, milord."

"Crucio. It's two words. Two words, not one."

After a few seconds of thrashing, it stoped. "Yes... My Lord."

"Better. Continue."

"The Potter brat has apparently found his way into China somehow. The Headmaster sent Fawkes to bring him back but Fawkes was attacked and now the Headmaster has no easy way to reach the boy."

"China? So far?"

"Potter seems to have met a few Asian magicals after a bout of accidental apparition. We don't know how they got him to cooperate, but Dumbledore is sure that the boy is out of the country."

"Maybe... yes. Return to Hogwarts, Snape. I can think of a couple of acquaintances that have a debt to work off."

Severus bowed low and left the chambers. He had potions to brew and secrets to betray... and in a month's time he would have students to teach. Serving two masters was never easy. Truly, there was no rest for the wicked.

**End Chapter**

REV 7/2012


	4. Breathing Room

**Chapter Four: Breathing Room**

August 2nd, 1996

The next morning began with a quick, hearty meal and some exercise.

Harry's new body came with its own natural balance and reach instincts, but it didn't come with the years of experience necessary to move gracefully as a girl. This morning, Harry has already spilled hot tea on 'herself' three times. The nature of the curse caused her to 'find' cold water just as often but in the kitchen the blonde seemed as unnaturally attracted to hot liquids as male Harry had become the target of cold ones. Watching her in action would give one the impression that she was a klutz. To a premier martial artist like Ranma, this simply would not do.

She had to be trained.

Harry didn't know it yet but as long as he/she stayed in the valley he/she would have his/her own fanatical personal trainer. Poor Harry. Of course, one's mind tends to wonder when they are practically dying from the pains of his... her... first exercise which included some short sprints and a light spar spar.

'Oh, God! Please kill me now. This ruthless bitch is going to crush me into little bits that even Wormtail could nibble on in his rat body.'

On the plus side, Harry has been getting much closer looks at girl parts than he used to get. It's one thing to focus on a girl like Cho and wonder what she might look like starkers. It's another to dump cold water over your head and get starkers yourself. Not that Harry did anything pervy... well maybe... okay, so she did... wouldn't you? It was a bit weird, true but the hinted benefits eventually lured her to the Pervy Side.

There was also the fact that Ranma always set the pace. Harry therefore spent a good bit of time staring and the hot red head's backside. Yes, yes, there is a boy in there but just look at that camouflage. It's brilliant. Of course, with Harry's gut about to come up out of her mouth do to the shear torture involved, Harry's concentration did wonder off once or thrice.

'Pitty such a nice arse is covered in such threadbare pants. Ranma can't get much in the way of new clothes way out in the middle of nowhere, even if a lot of muggle clothing is made in China… I bet Moody knows what Cho looks like starkers. I bet Moody knows what every girl in school looks like starkers! New Life's Goal: Get awesome magical eye…'

As the run continued on, everything Harry carried seemed to get heavier and heavier. Especially that scepter that she pulled out of the pool with hi-

'hold on a minute... that thing looks pretty valuable. Not that I'll be getting rid of such a powerful magic stick, but if I found that thing so easily, maybe there's more stuff in those pools.'

Harry had a new line of thought to carry her to the end of the run. Buried treasure.

"Hey, Ranma!"

Said redhead was performing her cooldown routine while Harry lay bonelessly panting on the ground.

"Yes?"

"So, how old are these pools again?"

"Well, I don't know the oldest, but 'my' pool was fifteen hundred years old when I fell in. 'Course, some of them are quite a bit younger, such as yours, Blondie."

Handstand, push off into a double back-flip. Blondie was still inert save her heaving bosom.

"Laugh it up, Red. Anyway, I was thinking about how there was a shiny magic stick at the bottom of my pool, yeah? And so... maybe some of the other pools have things just sitting in the mud at the bottom waiting to be discovered." In Harry's mind, the clouds above took the form of a Spanish treasure fleet coming back from the Americas.

"I don't doubt it for a minute, Blondie, but who's dumb enough to go digging around for it. The Pools of Sorrow tend to earn their name."

"I got an idea. Just let me be not about to die and we can try it."

Half an hour later, after a light meal with tea and sex-change, the two boys found themselves once again gazing over the pools. Ranma grabbed a stone and skipped it across the tops of a few different pools.

"So, we're here. What's your idea for how to not horribly mix curses by falling into lots of pools?" Ranma asked.

"Magic." Came Harry's simple reply.

"Magic?"

"Yeah."

"Fine then. Show me."

"Accio buried treasure!" Nothing seemed to happen. Ranma snickers.

"Right. Accio gold!"

Several somethings happened. The surfaces of at least a dozen pools erupted in small showers as a cloud of shiny things zipped towards Harry with frightening speed.

"Bugg" _- THWAP- _

Harry's foul language was cut off along with his consciousness as the shiny swarm reached its summoner. Harry took a heavy golden chalice right between the eyes.

"Idiot. Well at least you didn't yell 'accio weapons' or something." Ranma muttered.

Harry woke to the feel of a cold compress on her forehead. Her current caretaker, Ranma, seemed to be rather amused if the grin on his face was anything to go by. Harry tried to hide her embarrassment, which failed, so she tried to distract herself instead.

She looked over at the table near her bed… and the giant pile of shiny threatening to spill onto the floor. Ranma followed Harry's line of sight to the table and grinned.

"Stupid… your actions were really stupid… but you're also lucky as hell." Ranma said.

Damn. That pile o' gold was almost exactly what Harry wanted to find even if his method of finding it left much to be desired. The table was covered in coins, bracelets, necklaces and other assorted items that were gold or had some gold on them. A museum threw up at them. Some of that stuff looked really old.

"Wicked!" Harry got up so that she could check out the booty.

"Yer damn right. But..." It's like someone said 'red light' in front of a muggle kid.

"But?" Why was Ranma hesitating?

"If you been around Jusenkyo as long as I have, you tend to learn that some things are not for touching." Ranma intoned.

Harry lit up in understanding. "Ohhhhh. You think some of it could be cursed? That makes sense."

Harry pulled out her wand and cast the few detection spells she had learned due to months of frantic Triwizard Tournament training and defense club preparation. Magic worked over the pile and lit up different pieces with different colors and patterns.

"Some of it _is_ magical." Harry declared. "And some of the magical stuff _is_ cursed. Going to have to separate it and check them over one at a time."

"And we're going to have to wait for the Amazons to come say hi."

Ranma couldn't say that and not get a question in return. "And just who are the Amazons?"

"The amazons, or the Joketsuzoku, are one of the three local tribes that share this valley. They have a long history with the Pools of Sorrow. They are a society of warrior women who dominate their men and have some pretty strange laws. Please don't agree to fight one."

"What if I have to defend myself?"

Harry kept working with the treasure pile as the two talked. She began with separating coins from the pile one at a time and check them.

"Try to let me take care of it. There are generally two outcomes to a foreigner's fight with an amazon."

"I give, what are they?" Three coins clean, one cursed, one of unknown magical nature.

"If you win, you either get married or die. If you lose, you die." 'Wait, what?'

"Details please?" Harry squeaked.

She'd have to start the coins earlier. This was the new What-The-Fuck of the Day.

"Ni hao."

Too late.

Harry look over to the door to see a _gorgeous_ young woman with long purple hair and soft brown eyes. And a pair of round huge ass battle maces. Spectacular T&A actually offset the battle maces rather nicely as if she had chosen those weapons for their sex appeal enhancement qualities. New wanking material: check.

Ranma and the new girl suddenly had a rapid fire conversation in what sounded like Chinese to Harry, not that she was any better at picking it out after her initial failure upon first meeting Ranma. This new girl was local? Purple hair and all? Harry then had to admit that he really didn't know what a local looked like other than the guide who was not a totally shag-worthy hottie. Not even when they had bits that interlocked the right way. Unless the guide also had a hot girl curse but Harry was sure she'd have seen it by now if that were the case.

Back to the conversation which seems to have stopped. Yeah, maybe the new girl doesn't like it when other women openly check her out. Oops.

"Errr, sorry?"

Red and Purple verbally spar for another minute or two. Luckily they both seem to get a little more relaxed by the end of it. Purple ends it with a wink to Harry, a kiss blown at Ranma and a 'Baibai' to whomever could hear it as she sauntered back outside.

"Sooooo..." Harry said hopefully.

"I think that went well. Maybe."

"Maybe? Let's try the whole 'details please' thing again."

And so Ranma did provide details. Details about a girl who was on a log. Won a tournament too. Then he went into the whole 'hey that's mine' 'sorry' 'fight me' 'okay' and so on and so on. She's aggressive, hot, brutal, hot, cursed, hot, a pain-in-the-ass-psycho-killer, hot, In Love, hot, a pain-in-the-ass-stalker, hot, a good cook, hot, a good fighter, hot, just-friends-with-an-option-for-more-later, hot and hot. She has a great-grandmother who is very not hot. Granny is strong in the ways of whoop-ass, so don't piss her off. Please. Really. 'cause in a day or two, Granny was gonna come say 'hi' herself. With friends.

Lunch. Yummy. Let's follow that with some more magic practice then, shall we? Harry looked out over the pools.

"Let's not use 'accio' on the pools again, Harry. The next item to hit you in the head may be sharp and/or pointy." Ranma drawled.

"Right. Well, I could do with a bit more wand practice as a girl. No hot tea for lunch, eh? Not that I'm complaining mind you but, well, I like having my bits where they're supposed to be." Harry snarked back.

"If you're gonna whine like a girl, you can stay one. And, like you said, you need to get used to doing your magic with those things bouncing on your chest all tender like. Let me tell you how bad it was to retrain as a martial artist with these jugs. Not easy. I had to do it anyway, 'cause Shampoo was in her 'pain-in-the-ass-psycho-killer-hot' phase and if I couldn't fight with tits, then I'd be a stain on the forest floor in no time."

For a couple of hours, Harry combed her memory to cast just about every spell she could recall to get an idea of what changed and what didn't. Then she realized what an idiot she'd been up till now. As Ron would say on occasion, 'are you a wizard or not?' Well maybe the word witch should be used this time. Harry transfigured a cup, magically filled the cup with water and then magically heated the water and quickly dumped it on her head.

"Bloody hell, that's hot!"

Well, at least he was a he again.

Ranma wondered to himself how long it would take for Harry to master heating the water to a comfortable warm temperature for the change. Knowing Jusenkyo's influence like he did, he figured Harry would get lots of practice. Ranma laughed a little too loud to remain discreet.

"Entertained, are you? You thought me being burned was funny?"

"It's happened enough to me to say that... yes, it is funny. Especially when it happens to someone else."

"Well I think you'll be the one whining like a girl soon enough."

And so Harry opened a barrage of aguamenti's and other water related spells to punish Ranma. 'Finally, I can train myself to defend against a new style! Even if it isn't a martial art!' Ranma actually had fun evading and taunting Harry for the next three hours. By the end of it, both of them were wet, muddy, dirty girls.

The next two days actually settled down into a routine. A freaky martial arts vs. magic cross-training spectacle of skill and power, but still a routine. Ranma began to notice that they sometimes had an audience, if a hidden one. While he was tempted to pound on a spy or two, they always fled as soon as he made any aggressive moves away from Harry. On the bright side, the spies were surely going to report what they see and provide Ranma with some almost acceptable sparring partners in the very near future.

A bare fisted fight was sure to come their way. Ahhhh, good times.

During the same time, little happened to any of Harry's usual acquaintances save on two occasions.

* * *

Voldemort's inner sanctum was just as dark and foreboding as it was last time when Severus Snape became uncomfortably intimate with Voldemort's wand. Not that one you perv, the yew and phoenix feather one. A cruel arrogant asshole knelt before his master.

"My Lord" Snape came forward and kissed the hem of his master's robes.

"Report, Severus."

"Yes my Lord." He stood just a bit more rigidly than before and got right to it. "Potter has been detected practicing magic somewhere in the vicinity of China. The Order of the Phoenix is not equipped to send anyone after him so far away now that Dumbledore's phoenix is resting from the last attempt to get Potter. The Headmaster has been busy making discrete contacts within the ICW to try to get one or two of his foreign allies to look for the boy."

"I want to be notified when and where the boy's underage magic trial will be. We should remind him that he is not outside of my reach."

"It's not the Ministry's limited detection equipment that is picking up the Brat's rule breaking ways. Rather, it's the Headmaster's own special tools. His office is littered with devices calibrated to Potter and to his wand. If they weren't so valuable for tracking 'The-Boy-Who-Lived' and if they weren't proof of Blood Magic use by the Headmaster, then I'm sure Albus would have used them to provide support in his campaign to prove your resurrection much earlier than it was finally made public."

"Enough. I'll arrange for someone expendable to take a trip overseas. We should remind the boy that my influence goes beyond that of his protectors."

"Yes, my Lord."

* * *

Not too far away in time and location, Molly Weasley handed a key to a goblin inside of Gringott's to make a withdrawal.

The goblin was not amused.

Molly was surprised, "What do you mean, 'no'?"

Sneer. "It's simple, Madam. This account has been frozen due to suspected fraud against our client. This is not your key. Therefore, you can't get in the vault and we keep the key."

If this had been one of her children, Molly would have scourgified their mouth for such disrespect. Still, she is a very stubborn witch and there were never any problems before.

"You don't know what you're talking about. I've every right to that key. Harry knows I've got it. You can't give such responsibility to someone so young anyway. And... and with these dark times, I just won't have my babies out in the open where dark wizards can do Merlin knows what to them. No. You'll apologize to me and take me down to the vault immediately. Harry needs his things and I need to get school supplies for him and my two youngest as well so stop this nonsense and take me to the vault."

Angry sneer. "Madam. You didn't even show me a second key. Oh, that's right! The Weasley vault is nearly empty, isn't it?"

"I have no idea what you mean, you filthy little beast! I'll not explain my spending to the likes of you. Stop this charade and take me to the vault."

More sneering. "Your business here is over, unless you'll be making a withdrawal from some _other_ vault. And if you are so keen on getting Potter's key returned, bring Mister Potter with you next time. Good. Day."

The goblin took Harry's vault key and slipped it into a desk drawer with dramatic flair.

Molly was about to press the issue yet again, when she noticed that there were several goblins on her side of the teller desk that usually couldn't be found there. They were mean looking goblins carrying a variety of pointy things.

The other customers were really trying to pretend nothing was going on. A few customers wimpered in fear.

Maybe she could wait a day or two. Arthur's next deposit would be in by then.

* * *

In another part of the world, while Ranma and Harry ate their dinner and Ron Weasley ate his second or third lunch, a group of girls gathered in an ancient shrine within the urban sprawl of Tokyo. Several of these girls appeared to be high school juniors or seniors. Two looked to be several years younger and two others looked college age. The lot of them were all chatting about this movie or that boy, or that girl, or this movie or yadda yadda yadda.

It wasn't all that unusual to find girls gather to talk and things in Tokyo. It was unusual, however, to have a room full of mahou shojo a.k.a. magical girls gather to talk.

A rather stunning woman with long green hair paused at the threshold of the room. In the past, this would have been her cue to really get the magical girl meeting going by sneaking up behind the girl sometimes known as Sailor Moon and scaring the shit out of her in front of everyone. Sadly, she couldn't do that this time.

Things have been different this past year. Sailor Moon… the Moon Princess… Tsukino Usagi died in a twist of fate completely unbecoming her Magical Girl Royalty status. It was a complete accident. One in a trillion odds. She and the girls were on a class trip to a set of old shrines. It was just one of those things that all Japanese school students did on occasion. Who could have known that hidden on a side path on a hill overlooking the shrine was a bit of magic that was as old as Sailor Pluto's memory. No one. This lost relic turned out to be a dormant magical gate once designed to transport students of magic and the fighting arts between various training grounds the world over. Usagi walked directly over the buried gate just as countless others had done before her… only she was the first person in a _very_ long time to pass the gate while thinking about how wonderful her utopia would be once Crystal Tokyo was established. This thought process kept her magic just under the surface, hidden from view of her fellow teens but not from the magical gate's sensors. Ancient power wells opened and buried runes activated with enough of a magical release that Usagi vanished in thin air. Her closest friends watched in horror as their princess was taken from them. Having now exhausted its reserves, the gate made no attempt to send anyone after her. Her friends, both Senshi and normal, were frantic to find her again. It was hopeless. None of the search parties be they police or Senshi would find any clues that would point to the missing girl's location. Miss Tsukino would not be found.

Usagi arguably had the worse of it.

After battling demons and dark beasts of every shape and color, Usagi performed as well as could be expected after being caught unawares. She transformed into Sailor Moon even while undergoing surprise magical travel. By the time the gate released its human cargo Sailor Moon was ready for anything… or so she thought. Apparently the gate wasn't as accurate as it used to be or the girl would have been dropped off in front of the Jusenkyo guide's hut. Instead, she fell into one of the nearby pools. As her head went under, she still didn't know that the rest of her life would be measured in seconds. She didn't know that unclaimed pools would not let go no matter how strong the victim was. After all, the pools took monsters, gods and demons long before this Senshi went for a swim. Sailor Moon fought all she could, but all the effort just made her need for air worse. Her last conscious thought before darkness claimed her was about how her friends would never stop teasing her for surviving alien and demonic invasions only to drown in a stupid pool of water.

The Time Gates had shown Sailor Pluto what happened but only after the fact.

Funny, they never once hinted that such things could happen in the first place. At first, Pluto had nearly wet herself in panic. Without the Moon Princess, there was no Crystal Tokyo. Without Crystal Tokyo, there was no life, no future for mankind. Bad, bad, bad. She checked the gates subconsciously while wondering what the fuck she going to do next after such epic failure. What did she see? Miracle of miracles, Crystal Tokyo was still there, Queen and all. Pluto spent three months at the gate answering the question: What the fuck? Then she went back to Ami Mizuno a.k.a. Sailor Mercury and Makoto Kino a.k.a. Sailor Jupiter just seconds after their friend and leader disappeared not two paces in front of them. She had to run damage control. First, the girls had to know that Usagi would come back eventually. True, they still had to act concerned for the adults but that was easy since they were still plenty concerned. The girls would end up telling the authorities that Usagi had walked off alone to find a restroom and just never came back. In a Senshi meeting later that week, Pluto informed all of the Sailor Scouts that Usagi had really died. After the shouts and screaming died down, she explained. 'Really, you girls die all the time.' Their leader would come back. Except for Chibi-Usa who was Sailor Moon's daughter visiting from the future, no one got the full story. Being from the future and everything, Chibi-Usa knew something about this but even then she was still a little too young to really understand. She would cry on and off for weeks. They all would. Usagi may have been a flighty ditz but she was the Moon Princess; her infinite love and strength of will supported all of the other Senshi when they felt too weak to fight on alone. She was gone and they all grieved at the loss.

As information about the last year flashed through Setsuna Meioh a.k.a. Sailor Pluto's thoughts, the 'Outer' Scouts Neptune and Uranus spotted her at the door.

_"Hey, you're finally here. Last one as usual. So, what's this all about?"_ Haruka Tenoh, or Sailor Uranus to her enemies, was not known for being patient.

Setsuna drew up what confidence she could, and called up her first misdirection of the evening. "We'll be seeing our princess soon."

There was a round of applause. Chibi-Usa was still sad. She wanted her Momma back, like, now.

_"Listen carefully girls. Our princess will be in Japan in just a few days. I want all of you to do everything you can to support her upon her return."_

_"You make it sound like we wouldn't__,__"_ Grumbled Rei Hino, a.k.a. Sailor Mars.

_"You might not."_ Setsuna replied.

_"Explain."_

Simple and to the point. Just what you would expect from Ami. She was the smart one, the one that didn't waist too much time or thought on baseless speculation.

_"Princess Serenity will arrive looking just like the Usagi Tsukino you all knew and loved, but there will be a difference. It won't really be Usagi."_

_"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"_ Makoto shouted.

Makoto had been kicked out of a lot of schools before meeting the other 'Inner' Senshi and settling down. With Usagi gone, her old habits were coming back up and she was in trouble with her teachers again. She needed Usagi, if for no other reason than to find peace again.

Setsuna explained_. __"Usagi ran afoul of a relic from the early times back when Queen Serenity was still__ building her empire. __Through no fault of her own, she activated__ a gate that could teleport people around the world. Unfortunately this gate reacted to her magic and __came to life__ long enough to take Usagi to an ancient combat training ground found in an inland Chinese province. Th__is__ training gro__und was known then and is still known now for being challenging dangerous terrain__. __She fell into a natural spring from which she could not escape__. __The locals retrieved her body from the well and buried it-"_

There were gasps and hisses at that point. Setsuna continued.

"_They buried the 'strange girl who fell from nowhere'__ yet h__er spirit stayed in Jusenkyo in __the__ spring until just a couple of days ago when anot__her visitor to the springs, a young British __w__izard, fell into the same spring she d__rowned in and released Usagi's spirit__.__With his happy accident and her release, the two are now tied together by fate in a way that would not have been possible without __Jusenkyo__'s influence__.__"_

Makoto finally had to interrupt at this point. Something really important was just mentioned.

_"Wait, wait, wait... okay, first. Wizards are real? Second. Is he cute?"_

_"What about Mamoru?__ Is __Usagi__ still going to marry him__?__"_ Minako Aino, the blonde known at times as Sailor Venus, was more than ready to embrace Makoto's idea. _"A love triangle! Only True Love will win out in the end!"_

_"First, wizards. Yes, they are real. You may have noticed that we Senshi are not the only magically capable people on this planet. Almost every continent supports its own magical world, each a little different from the others. While you girls make public appearances, there are actually laws against magicals going public in most countries. For the record, you girls are not breaking any such laws. On the other hand, your public battles have almost gotten you arrested about a dozen times in the past on grounds of destruction of private property."_

Setsuna allowed the girls to take that in for a moment.

_"Second, his name is Harry Potter, he is sixteen, English, has unruly black hair, pretty green eyes, fame among his own kind and money."_

_"Go Usagi!" "But what about Mamoru?" "That gold digging slut!"_

There were, of course, varied reactions upon hearing that Usagi had gotten herself another man.

_"Quiet!"_ The hormonal teens shut up. Thank God. _"Mister Potter relea__sed her spirit, but she is still dead. You'll just have to trust me that you will get Usagi back if you can just wait. The first time you see her, she won't__ even__ remember who any of you are, she won't remember how she got her Moon Kingdom powers, she won't even__ speak Japanese."_

_"__But what you say makes no sense. Why won't she be able to speak Japanese? How can we prepare for her return without any details? When and where will we see her next?__"_ Ami wanted to see her friend and princess again but she also wanted assurances that things would all work out in the end.

_"Now, where would the fun in that be?"_ Setsuna called upon her power as Sailor Pluto and vanished.

The girls all felt short changed. That green haired bitch hadn't even explained the romance angle or where Usagi's future husband Mamoru fit in this.

_"Crap."_

_"Language Haruka!"_

_"Sorry Michiru."_

**End Chapter**

REV 7/2012


	5. The Phoenix and the Musk

Disclaimer addendum: Currently, Harry Potter, Ranma ½, and Sailor Moon are being literarily violated. Avatar, Naruto, Devil Hunter Yohko and others will be referenced but have no speaking characters. Yet. I still don't own any of them.

**Chapter Five: The Phoenix and the Musk**

August 5th, 1996

Harry shivered a little as she returned from her breakfast fishing expedition. It was a crisp morning with a low fog covering most of the valley. It would take about half an hour for the sun to actually reach the valley floor and a good hour after that for most of the fog to burn off. She shivered again, almost dropping the levitation charm holding up the modest fish she'd... he'd accio'd before falling in. Now she had her fish, but she was wet and cold as hell.

'Stop. Wait, what am I missing here?'

Harry once again had to use the invisible Ron on her shoulder to make a connection that her muggle upbringing just kept ignoring.

'Are you a wizard or not?'

And she'd just been practicing all those spells for the past few days. She dropped the levitation charm she'd been controlling the fish with and used the hot-air-charm on herself to dry off and get some warmth back. Another round of goblet/water/heat spells and Harry was back to a bloke. Recasting the levitation charm on the fish was old hat now and Harry managed to make it all the way to the hut before some condensation dropped from the thatch roof and the Titty Fairy visited her new best friend.

She handed off the fish to the guide, who had come back yesterday with fresh supplies. He was quite happy to see the golden bounty that Harry pulled from the depths of Jusenkyo and the three had agreed this morning to finish going through the uncursed loot and split it three ways. Last night, the cursed loot was unceremoniously tossed back into random pools and promptly forgotten. All three agreed that the young wizard would get all of the uncursed magical items in exchange for a much smaller share of the non-magical gold.

Breakfast became a time to recap to the guide what the 'girls' had been doing while he was gone.

"So I now having two new fields of trees? And gold from pools. I not feeling sorrow of pools for next few seasons I think." The older man mused aloud.

"True, it's always nice to have a little spending money." Ranma agreed. "Give me and Harry here a few more days like the last, and we'll have a new scroll on magical theory to add to your archives. It's a shame that almost nobody ever stays around after they get their curses."

Ranma let out a little belch. After quickly wolfing down everything on her plate, she admired her sparkly-ness. Ranma couldn't resist wearing some elaborate jeweled pieces that may have originated in the Spring of Drowned Ashura if the design were anything to go by. The high number of bracelets with only one matching necklace and one tiara was also a good indicator. Shiny.

The guide spoke up about his trip. "In last village I visit, they is talking of Amazons being more moving and talking. I thinking they seeing you soon. Maybe Mr. Wizard should be leaving so he not become husband of warrior womans?"

"Well, Shampoo's already been by-" Ranma said… until the guide cussed up a storm.

Ranma argued with him for a minute or two in a dialect that Harry couldn't follow.

'What I wouldn't give for some kind of translation spell or something.'

Pity Harry couldn't tell _what_ enchantments were on his treasures just yet, or he'd put on the universal translator ring that was first crafted by a Vietnamese Royal Wizard about twelve hundred years ago. The ring became a treasure of Jusenkyo when the fierce dark wizard fell into the Spring of Drowned Chicken, ending up on a local villager's dinner table the next night. Eleven herbs and spices were involved.

Ranma had finished her argument with the guide. "Look, Harry. We'll stick it out long enough to trade knowledge with the Amazon Elders and get some good traveling supplies. Shamps said that they'd be back in a few days after scouting out who else may have sensed your magical outbursts of the last few days."

"Outbursts?" Harry asked, suddenly nervous that either Voldemort or Dumbledore might be able to track him down even here.

Ranma answered. "Word has it that to those who are sensitive to the spirits, you've been lighting this valley up like a Christmas Tree."

Harry flinched.

"Didn't know they had Christmas Trees here." Harry added with a bit of snark. He wasn't in the best of moods right now.

Ranma wasn't taking any shit though. "I could have said 'like the Fourth of July' just to piss your British ass off."

"Sorry." 'Must be her time of the... oh bloody hell, I could have one of those now, too.'

Harry cleaned her gold leaf trimmed porcelain plate and stepped outside. It had only taken another minute or two for the guide and Ranma to finish splitting the gold to everyone's satisfaction. Ranma joined Harry outside free of jewelry to kick off another training round.

The redhead called to the blonde. "Okay! Good, you chose to start the day a girl. Perfect for our plans. Pull out that magic sparkle stick and get magic-ing!"

Ranma started her warm up katas to get in the mood for heavy ki use later.

Harry started her day slow and easy. While she had cast some magic with her 'sparkle stick' before, they got a little distracted by the whole 'instant forest' trick. This time, there would be no distractions and no stopping. Failure. Failure. Success. Success. Failure. From her first year up, every single spell was cast through the scepter. Harry felt like there was some rule that the scepter had to follow, some natural strength or focus... and then she happened on her biggest success of the day.

The cursed girl thought of her happiest memory and called, "Expecto Patronum!"

The scepter's crystaline shaft visibly flared like a lighting strike. Almost immediately that light burst forth in the form of stags and does. She had called forth a herd of nearly solid deer and every one of them as strong as the best patronus Harry had ever cast. This had to mean something.

Ranma touched down on the earth next to Harry. "I wanna hear about this one..."

* * *

"But I don't want to hear about it Hermione! It's bloody two in the morning and we need our beauty sleep!"

Ginny threw a pillow which missed the older witch's unkempt hair.

Said older witch went silent and slid back into her own bed. She was going to amaze them with her presentation on Eastern Magic tomorrow. They just didn't know what they were missing. As much respect as she had for the accrued tenure of Professor Binns, he didn't present a wide survey of the subject. His specialization in the Goblin Wars was beginning to chafe.

'Maybe the headmaster will let me present my findings to the Order!' Dreams of extra credit and a happy, affectionate Harry giving her a foot rub filled the night. She really wanted to show him that book on magic massage techniques she found in the Black Library too... Damned if Ginny didn't run off with that 'fertility' magic tome they found in Molly's cast-off pile. The Weasleys probably already had a sex magic tome with their numbers.

Of course, that would be a point in Ron's favor... 'But do I want to be the next Molly Weasley?' With a shudder, Hermione's dreams went from pleasant and happy to dark and cold in one vile thought.

No. It wouldn't matter how good the Weasley family grimoire collection was, if there were one. She would not entertain the notion of joining that family by marriage any longer.

* * *

The Patroni were not going away. They were grazing. A few of them were actually beginning to mate with each other.

"So these deer are the result of a really strong happy thought then." Ranma mused.

"Yeah, that's it."

Harry had started the explanation with her unfortunate third year train ride and her need to learn the Patronus Charm to fend off dementors. They just would not leave her alone, going even so far as to try to take her soul in the middle of a quidditch match. If she ever figured out how to get rid of them, she'd purify the whole world!

Ranma had made some odd comment about a crazy, obsessive bitch named Kodachi, something about black rose petals and drugs, but didn't offer more background on the supposed human dementor.

Harry left out the 'worst memory' bit. Ranma didn't need to know about his memories of the night his parents died. Besides, it's not like Ranma would ever come face to face with a dementor, right?

"The way I see it," Ranma started, "this is a branch of magic that runs really close to my ki techniques."

"What do you mean? How does you shooting life force about resemble magic? We know from our little experiments that they operate independent of each other."

This was something Harry would have known years back if she'd just been paying attention to those magical theory lessons from Professors Flitwick and McGonagall. Too bad Hermione wasn't around to help with the research they've been doing. She'd have been in research heaven.

Hermione sneezed in her sleep.

"There's a lot of discipline and control, but more than that, what rules your spell is emotion. It's the same thing in many mid-level ki techniques. Confidence, calm, anger, love, depression, fear... these emotions allow martial artists who have some control over their ki to release serious power. Only a ki master can achieve anything close without such an emotional focus."

"Love? Are you saying magic can be powered by love?"

"Surely that Patronus spell of yours isn't the only example. Come on, tell me another love based spell. I'm sure at least one of the others you know uses it."

Harry did know another love based magic. He owed his very life to it. Still, he wasn't ready to own up to this in front of Ranma.

"Well..." Ranma could tell Harry was uneasy, but she knew that the younger boy-turned-girl would open up at her own pace. Ranma still felt her own scars plenty good enough to tell when someone shared the same kind of pain. "Well... there is a shield. One powered by love. I can't tell you its name or anything. Just that I know about it. It's wicked strong."

After a few minutes of silence, Red and Blondie got up and sought out stress relief by way of practice. Harry still had two more years of spells to work through. Ranma sought out inspiration for a new kata. Her skills at ki manipulation had risen steadily since the last time she had to do the whole 'save the damsel in distress' thing back when she was a teenager and some of her new power could only be expressed properly in original techniques and kata.

Ranma spent many a sleepless night over the years pondering her past battles with Prince Herb of the Musk and Saffron, the God-King of Phoenix Mountain. Both of those fights involved opponents who seemed all-powerful. Both fights required Ranma to use her true talent for adaptation. In the years since, Ranma worked hard at achieving mastery over ki without any emotional focus. The results were impressive in training but since that time Saffron angered her to the point of her killing the bastard, she hadn't found any opponents which called for that highest level of her art. Saffron had been reborn, true, but was still no-where near fighting form. Ranma had hoped Herb would show his ass and demand a rematch. Maybe she was just advanced enough that the only real way to go is training an heir.

Ranma briefly looked over to Harry. Well… the Brit had the heart and rough past to be a good fit but she clearly had no martial training and she had plenty on her plate learning magic as it was. No. Better to get an heir the traditional way…

She'd have to make one for that to work. Better use hot water first. Otherwise, ewwww... Ranma sorta looked forward to being a father one day but the idea of being a mother just gave her horrible nightmares. Not the giving birth part even if that was pretty squicky… no, it was the 'how girls get pregnant' part she had a huge problem with when she imagined herself in the girl side of the equation. Tits or no, Ranma was dead set on being the man in the relationship when it came to having kids.

She absently gazed in the direction of the Joketsuzoku village further down the valley.

As Ranma looked towards the village of woman warriors, a detachment of elders and warriors set out to visit the Pools of Sorrow. Though it would only take their party a few hours to reach the pools other visitors would finish their journey much sooner.

Ranma would not be denied her sparring partners much longer.

Lunch was fish, rice and two pickles per person. Harry moaned. Not for the food quality, mind you. It was the story he'd just heard.

"So you look this girl in the face and tell her she's cute and.. and.. that's all it took? Love? I am so glad I'm a bloke. I mean, even if I was going girl right now that's still plain wrong." Harry told Ranma after a story about a girl named Ukyo, a stolen cooking cart and a martial arts food battle.

Lunch was a good opportunity to go guy for a while. The weather was good and Harry had finished his five year spell review with the Scepter of Prissiness. Talking about how deranged their love lives were was a good way to let the magical test results settle for a while before the boys analyzed everything.

"Like Ginny was any better. She loved you years before you ever knew her!" Ranma stopped for a second. "She's the one you're worried about, right?"

"Right. Her older brothers are afraid Ginny might start messing around with love potions… they know for a fact their mum used them on their dad once back in their school days. Normally Fred and George would be behind their family one hundred percent but they felt it only fair to give me a warning since I've done so much for the family already. They figure I've done more than enough for them to give me a helpful warning about Ginny. They figure she's a bit too in love. Like she thinks we belong together and that I already belong to her or something. I keep catching her with these other blokes but Neville figures she wants me to get jealous, and I think he's right."

"And you say she's good with her hexes too. She's a regular Amazon then. God, I lost track of all the potions and pills that Shampoo tried to stuff down my throat over the years. In between the viscious beatings, that is."

"She didn't seem so bad the other day."

"She's grown up a lot in the past few years." Ranma seemed thoughtful. "When I came back to China, she swore on her honor that she'd put her old ways behind her."

"I'll say she's grown up." And out. Ranma seemed to catch Harry's meaning too.

"She was always curvy. Damn. If only she hadn't spent the first two months of our relationship trying to murder my in my sleep I would have been all over that, wedding ceremony or not."

Ranma looked back at the mistakes, both hers and others, in her life. It wasn't hard as there were quite a lot of them. 'Stupid Pops. Stupid wedding agreements. Stupid Amazon Law. Stupid me.'

"Living in Hogwarts, you see a few love potions gone bad almost like clockwork, maybe twice a year, somebody up and declares their undying love to the most unlikely person. You can tell in the 'recipients' face if it was planned or not. And they don't really get punished for that. Funny. Why-ever not?"

Ranma wasn't about to mention the Koi Rod Incident. One of Ranma's old rivals mistakenly landed a love enchantment on Ranma because of a magical fishing rod. Magic made Ranma fall deeply in love with the boy until the enchantment was lifted. If Ryoga had been any less innocent then than Ranma was at the time, and if Ryoga hadn't considered Ranma his arch-enemy at the time, he could have used the love forced on Ranma to deflower the redhead. It was memories like this one that gave Ranma nightmares about being the girl in a physical relationship. The thought that they could have… that for a day or two 'she' would have let him… Ranma slammed that memory back in the steel vault in his mind and welded the door shut.

"So! No good prospects for you in school, just like me." Ranma was glad someone else's love life sucked as bad as his did.

"Not yet anyway. Can't really trust most of 'em. The whole 'Boy-Who-Lived' thing and all. Looks like I won't be finding Miss Right anytime soon."

Harry's attention seemed to wander off for a second and a stupid grin formed on his face before he could wipe it off. Too bad for him Ranma saw that.

"Maybe not Miss Right, but it looks like you met Miss Right Now." Ranma added a bit of a teasing tone and pointed a pickle at Harry.

"Some little witch ride your broom?" Harry went Weasley red and stared at the ground. "Polish your wand?"

A bit of fish fell from Harry's sagging jaw and hit the ground.

Ranma jumped at the reaction, "Oh, come on... tell me! This sucks. You got laid years before I did."

"Promise to tell your story too."

Even through the embarrassment, this was the first time Harry felt comfortable enough with someone to tell the tale. It helped that she doubted Ranma would ever meet someone from Hogwarts he/she could spread gossip to.

Ranma only wavered a moment before a determined look entered her eyes. "Fine."

"Fine. Right. You see, I don't rightly know who they were-"

"What? 'They'?" Ranma interrupted. "Lucky little shit."

"Hey!" Harry's gaze wasn't coming up off the ground by his feet any time soon.

"Sorry, I'll shut up now."

"Right. Well I was sneaking back to Gryffindor tower after a defense club meeting when I get hit in the back with a stunning spell. Woke up blindfolded and tied to a bed. For a minute, I was sure I'd been abducted by those Junior Death Eaters I told you about before, Mafloy, Crabbe and Goyle. But I was wrong. As I'm starting to struggle a bit, I hear some giggling off to the side. There was two girls. I got my first clue that I wasn't about to die horribly when I heard each girl cast a contraception charm. They didn't say anything else the whole time. Just the giggling and the moaning after that. God I hope they were old enough. I don't need that on my conscience too. Must have been Slytherin girls. You know, I always expected to be ambushed by Slytherins but in a 'I'm-gonna-really-hurt-you' way and not a 'sit-on-your-face' kind of way."

Ranma snorted. "A 'sit-on-your-face' kind of way? Like I said, you lucky little shit."

"Bite me." Harry grouched back.

"Not even with cold water." Ranma shifted a little and looked off into the distance. "Anyway. My first time was a couple of years ago. I had come up dry on Jusenkyo cures from one end of Japan to the other and had decided to follow up a lead on some kind of magic fountain I heard about in America."

"What, the Fountain of Youth?" Harry had heard of a fountain in the States. A tourist trap and shoddy piece of work, or so it looked from the telly program on Florida.

"That's the one! It was supposed to be the one... water tastes and smells like rotten eggs. Don't ever swim in it." Ranma bestowed his sage advice.

"I wouldn't dare." Harry promised.

"Good. Back to the dirty story. I had been training for a bit and had to enter this tournament to earn some extra cash. Went girl as they had all the guys they wanted. It was some fighting tournament where you beat the shit out of each other and pin each other to the ground in submission holds. Sorry, it was supposed to be. I had already competed in the Dead or Alive tournament the year before, but we 'girls' got sent to an island so some rich asshole could drool at our hot bodies. But hey, the money was good and I got to work on my Anything-Goes Volleyball technique. One girl wanted a private re-match after I trounced her publicly. So Tina... that's her name... so Tina makes it a drinking game. One shot for every point. That was one messed up volleyball game. She couldn't play as well as I could, but she could sure hold her liquor. I still don't remember when she started kissing me, just that we were playing ball one minute and groping each other the next."

"And you're still a girl?"

"Yup. Well until she spilled hot tea on us both. Thought she was gonna kill me for a minute there. I choked out the story of my curse and asked if she was gonna snap my neck or knife me in the gut. And then she gets this shit-eating grin on her face and suggests sex with 'both of me' as a way of making it up to her for the deception. I was wasted and horny as hell, so I went for it. She could tell I was a virgin and she thought she'd won the lottery for being able to pop the same cherry twice. I was so embarrassed I couldn't look her in the face for the rest of the tournament. Lost a match because of it too… forty thousand yet gone just like that…"

"So, to recap. There was two of them for me, but there was two of you for Tina. Right?"

"Right." Ranma nodded.

"We just don't do normal, do we?"

"No."

Harry caught sight of something over the treeline behind Ranma.

"We have guests. Winged flying guests."

Lunchtime was over. Emissaries of the Phoenix Tribe had arrived.

Three phoenix warriors swooped in low over the forest edge, landing gracefully ten meters distant from Ranma and Harry's outdoor lunch table. There was one female with two males, guards by the look of them. Ranma's eyes narrowed and she stood up. She knew the female. Kiima. Now there was someone who Ranma really had a problem with. The bird woman once had Ranma's fiancée Akane tossed into a fresh Jusenkyo pool to make a 'Spring of Drowned Akane'. On purpose. Akane was lucky enough to live through the experience, something few other spring making victims could ever claim. Ranma really had no desire to ever see Kiima again. Kiima's Lord Saffron had also used Akane as a sacrifice to regain his full powers until Ranma put a stop to it. Near the end, Ranma thought that Akane was really dead and reacted by dismembering Saffron in rage.

It didn't matter that Akane and Saffron both returned to the land of the living. Ranma would much prefer never to see another phoenix or Phoenix Tribesman ever again.

"Kiima." Ranma addressed their visitor bluntly. The winged woman flinched before gathering her resolve and slowly walking forward. Seeing Ranma's attitude, Harry was content to stay out of this one.

Once again, Harry had to sit back and watch Ranma meet and greet the locals. Too bad. Harry really wanted to have more of an idea of what these people were like. Kiima looked over to Harry and then past him as if expecting to find someone else. She then settled back on Harry unable to find what she was looking for.

"Greetings traveler. I am Kiima, Seneschal of the Phoenix King Saffron." Thank Merlin so many locals ended up knowing English.

"Hello, Kiima. I am Harry Potter from England. Pleased to meet you." A few of the patroni had detached from the main herd to sniff out Kiima and her guards. While the patroni weren't going away, they also weren't being aggressive. For their part, the winged trio were able to show almost no reaction to the patroni. Kiima was out on official business, so a minor distraction like a herd of glowing magic deer could be ignored for a minute or three.

Harry started to get up now that Kiima had taken an interest in him. Started to, until he bumped the water jug he had been drinking from. Harry changed forms causing Kiima's eyes to widen for a second. After Harry finished standing up, Kiima plainly saw the scepter stuck into Harry's belt. Harry could see it in her eyes. She had found who she was looking for after all.

Kiima's posture deserted the open fight-or-flight stance from moments before to one of stiff formality. "Please forgive my rudeness, Child of the Moon. I bring greetings and a gift from King Saffron, who is your kin."

'Kin? This drowned girl was related to these people?' Harry didn't see the connection and Ranma's patience with the woman who had caused him so much pain in the past was wearing thin.

"Cut the crap, Kiima. Deliver your message and leave me and my friends alone!" Harry felt a lot better hearing Ranma admit their odd friendship. She didn't have enough friends in her opinion.

Kiima didn't want to return to the mountain a failure after coming so close to the girl that triggered so many of their heirloom treasures. She had to make her offer quickly.

Kiima bent low at the waist while holding a small hand carved wooden case before her.

"Please allow me to present Lady Potter with a token of my King's respect." She held the case out further. "This is but a small token, one of many Royal Treasures which reacted with light and magic when Lady Potter cast her spells upon the valley. My Lord has requested that I present this treasure to you as a sign of His loyalty to family."

"We ain't going to see him it that's what he wants!"

Ranma was getting pissed. Kiima was staying around too long and she was not fighting. A lose-lose scenario for Ranma.

Kiima for her part looked to be near panic in the face of the one who killed her Lord. This wasn't going well for her. "Please listen. We would not make demands on either of you. My Lord asks nothing in return. Lady Potter may dismiss us as soon as she reviews the gift."

Harry eyed the box warily. It's decorations did vaguely resemble details on her scepter. "Just how are we supposed to be related anyway?"

"Our Lord Saffron's parents left this world many thousands years ago, but we have many of their possessions and Saffron himself retells the oral history to his people at a great feast once a year. Long before our tribe came to be, Lady Tranquility, who was kin to the Moon Empress, gave her heart to a noble immortal bird. The First Phoenix could assume human form and do great magics, much as his Lady could, and so they set out to find land for their own kingdom here on Earth. After much magic and great feats of strength, Phoenix Mountain became a fortress home to our people and we praised our rulers. In time, their only son Saffron grew to be strong and powerful much as his parents were. Then there came a great war, one that spread across the Earth and Sky, and our King and Queen departed to the Heavens to do battle with dark beings. Lord Saffron was left to defend his people and await his parents return. Sadly, the war was great and terrible, and most of the peoples of this world and several others were put to the sword. It is said that when she saw her husband die in battle, Queen Tranquility fell once more to Earth, falling deep inside of Phoenix Mountain and it is her tears which fill the magical pools of Jusenkyo."

"That's a nice enough story, but you still haven't answered the question." Harry was beginning to wonder if he'd fallen into the Spring-of-Drowned-Magical-Alien-Royalty. Anything seemed possible now.

"Queen Tranquility's personal jewels and symbols of station were left behind in our Royal Treasury. It is these items which would react to her family magics, and they did react to magics cast near the pools these past several days. And I can see that you carry a sign of station upon your person. That scepter is not unlike Lady Tranquility's possessions. Please, even if you do not accept the origins of our people, I humbly beg you, take this gift that I may tell our King that his token was received." Once more, she extended the delicate carved box in the palms of her hands.

Clearly, Ranma was still against it. Harry, however, decided to test the gift. She pulled out her wand and cast the same detection charms used on the windfall from the pools. While the box was clearly heavily enchanted, there did not seem to be any trace of dark magic or other curses involved. Fortune favors the Gryffindor and all that...

Harry took the box from a very relieved Kiima and openned it. Delicately resting on blue silk, Harry found a crystal crescent moon pendant on a thin gold chain. As soon as she placed her wand tip against the pendant, it disappeared. At the same time, harry felt a weight against her skin. Shocked that the pendant could transfer itself over to her neck, she desperately wondered how to get it off. The crescent immediately showed up back in the open box.

'Well, that's not so bad.' She touched it again and it reappeared on her neck.

Ranma had enough, and while Harry continued to contemplate her new shiny thing, the red head sent Kiima and her escort away with a few rough words.

"Please any God listening," Ranma intoned, "Send me someone that's not afraid to get roughed up a little."

Wish Granted.

* * *

Breakfast at the Burrow was tense. This morning's tension had nothing to do with the French part-Veela flitting about making the other women of the house feel less worthy and more rabid, though that sure didn't help. No, this morning's tension was all Hermione. She was nearly bursting at the seams with excitement. Ginny already hit her with a carefully concealed calming charm just to keep the witch from going mental and taking everyone else along for the ride.

Ginny took Mum's wand to avoid the underage wand trace not knowing that there really was no such thing. Not at the Ministry level anyway. The Ministry tracked such things by location and there was too much of-age spellcasting in a magical household to spot such offenses. Purebloods knew better anyway, right? They could use the honor system couldn't they? It was that kind of reasoning that ensured that muggle raised and muggleborn children got the shaft.

Calming charm or not, breakfast was nearly over so Hermione took it as her cue to start her summer history class. She waited until Ron had one last large mouthful of sausage and scrambled eggs before launching into her dissertation. A quick scan of the room showed that Ginny, the twins and perhaps a few others were present and would be able to hear what she said. Luna and Neville would just have to wait.

"You will not believe how different magic is in the Far East. It's just brilliant what I've found out. I really hope Harry appreciates what he's getting to experience on his little trip. I'm definitely going to have to get him to tell us everything."

Ron's already heard more than he wanted to hear. "How does it concern us here when he's way over there, 'Mione?"

Miss Granger knew that there was one thing she could say early to ensure the prat's attention. "Well, in Japan, a magical girl can't access her powers until she activates them with what's commonly referred to as a 'naked whirly light show'."

Half of the sausage fell out of Ron's mouth. Yes, she had his attention. "It's sad just how predictable the boy can be."

"That's any boy, Hermione." Ginny added. The twins seemed very interested as well.

"Right Ginny. Anyway, the last time Ancient China had wizards and witches in the same numbers that we have in Europe today was about three thousand years ago. The Shang Dynasty actually used dark wizard clans to great effect to keep the commoners enslaved for centuries. Then, in 1046 BC, Zhou Wu Wang was able to tear down the Shangs and kill their king Di Xin by enlisting elite martial warriors known as 'ki adepts', who use life energy to make their attacks more powerful. The Zhou Dynasty set about hunting down the dark wizarding families with the help of these ki adepts and managed to kill off almost all of them. What remains of the once great wizarding clans is just a handful of poorly trained wizards and witches along with a rather large squib population. Luckily, this extermination didn't do anything to the magical plants and animals of China or the ancient written histories and magical scrolls. The conquering warriors were quite happy to keep those records as proof of their bloody slaughter."

"While this is better than our normal goblin rebellion lesson, I want to hear about the naked light shows." Ron said.

"Here, here!" "Seconded!"

"Boys! I'm getting to it! Honestly..." Hermione huffed.

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Don't worry, Hermione. I estimate you've got another ninety seconds before they go hex crazy."

"Thanks, Ginny. Where was I... the Zhou Dynasty. Anyway, the ki adepts had some differences of opinion with the Zhou's and went their own ways. This formed the tribes of Chinese Amazons. Completely outside of this conflict was another powerful group of lesser nations who controlled elemental forces. Their skilled warriors were known as 'benders' for their ability to bend an element to their will. Sadly, much of their histories were lost after the Fire Nation sparked a war with the other nations causing mass destruction and the deaths of nearly every living elemental master."

"Mioneeeeeee." She was about to lose Ron. Surprisingly, her audience had gotten a few heads bigger.

"Almost there! Honestly! On to Japan. There are rumors of a large island just southeast of Hokkaido which is hidden to muggles. This island maintains an ancient lifestyle and honors the warrior tradition of Ninjutsu. While even muggles have heard of the ninja shadow warriors, they don't know about the use of 'chakra' a mental energy that the Black Library really has no good definition for. Finally on to the 'Mahou Shoujo' or Japanese Magical Girls."

"Finally!"

Hermione continued her lecture. "Quite. These girls only rarely come from maternal or paternal lines. Of those that do, usually they are dedicated Devil Hunters."

This got Ginny's attention. "What, like horns and flesh eating and virgin raping demons?"

"Exactly that. These families tend to be rather small since girls that don't measure up get raped and eaten by demons."

Ginny turned to her mother. "Mum, thanks for giving birth to me in a country where my chances of being raped and eaten by demons are quite low."

"Anything for you, Ginny dear." Mrs. Weasley patted her daughter's head, an action that Ginny allowed this time.

"Thanks Mum."

Hermione retook control. "Now, these devil hunters are not the only kind of magical girl in Japan. Another group consists of planetary avatars, also known as Senshi, who call on the power of celestial bodies to fight beasts from other dimensions as well as the occasional alien invader. Without exception all mahou shoujo call on their magic by using a focus of some sort. This focus is usually wand or scepter like in appearance. When not using their magic, these girls live the lives of ordinary muggles. They only call on their magic to fight evil or to magically aid worthy muggles or to communicate with each other. So far, every avatar and devil hunter I've researched has had to undergo a magical wardrobe change in order to battle their chosen enemy in the proper magical uniform."

"But what do these uniforms look like?" Ron wanted to know. He really, really wanted to know.

"Yes, oh Queen of Research..." "..surely you have visual aides to help boost your grade today?"

Hermione scrunched up her nose at this. She knew they'd want a visual payoff. Unfortunately for her, her research came through. She moved her plate and silverware over to make room for a couple of books. She carefully opened the first tome to a marked page.

OOOOOOOOooooooo. AAAaaahhhhhhh.

"Gentlemen, and I use the term loosely, meet Devil Hunter Yohko."

"That dress is brilliant!"

"What dress, it's like she's wearing a tight shirt and no shorts! I can see her knickers!" Ginny hissed.

Hermione flipped open the other book, blocking Miss Yohko from perving eyes.

"This next one is a rare wizarding photo of Sailor Moon and Sailor Mars fighting Youma in a Tokyo shopping district."

It was a quick and shaky shot. Luckily for the boys looking on, Moon fell in front of the camera after taking a hit from the Youma and gave everyone a nice look at her ass.

"Full marks to Hermione on this one Gred!" "Right you are Forge."

"Honestly. Of course, this is all I could do with just the Black Library. Given access to Hogwarts or Flourish and Blott's," Hermione threw a glare at Molly, "I'm sure to have been more thorough."

* * *

Prince Herb reached the Pools of Sorrow shortly before the Phoenix delegation flew in but had settled in about half a kilometer out to observe this 'sorceress' himself. His loyal warriors stayed nearby ready to follow whatever orders he may give.

At first, he simply watched as his former enemy ate outdoors with an outsider male. A weak looking one at that. Then the Phoenix made their entry and this foreign male revealed his Jusenkyo curse. The Prince scowled. Why couldn't the sorceress have been born female? On the other hand, breaking this one to his will would be a more satisfying challenge than had she been naturally born female. And look at the respect given by those damned birds! The scorceress may just be a perfect mate after all, if for no other reason than to insult those flying menaces.

As Kiima and her escort finished their business and became specks on the horizon, Herb signaled his men. _Move._

Ranma's head jerked up and she looked into the tree line.

"Harry, that sparkle stick made your shield spells bad-ass, right?"

"Yes, some of them, why?"

Ranma began to walk between Harry and the tree line. "Get out between some of those pools and throw up any defense you got that might repel physical attack."

Harry's eyes went wide. "Out there?"

Ranma nodded sharply. "It's not ideal, but that's the only way to slow down these guys coming in from the forest. We can always hope they ignore you for me."

Harry jogged out to and then past the first pool. She quickly transfigured a wooden plank path in front of her when the grass between pools is too narrow and dispelled the path behind her. Harry had barely made it past the second pool when a group of seven rather fierce looking men cleared the forest edge. Ranma turned her back to the pools and sized them up.

"And Harry?"

"Yes?"

"No weak stuff. These guys like to play rough." Harry went from thinking about dealing with class rivals to thinking about dealing with Death Eaters. Thank Merlin he and Hermione had started hitting the restricted section more often after the Tri-Wizard Tournament's First Task. Dragons had been a real wake-up call for the boy. This magic shit could kill you if you didn't prepare for it.

Ranma scanned the new arrivals. Herb, check. The half-dragon prince gained some muscle since last time, but then so did Ranma. Considering Herb's ki mastery last time they fought, it's hard to see him improving there though what he does with his talents could have changed.

Lime and Mint, check. These two may be socially backwards, but their teamwork was solid last time and should be a good challenge this time too. 'I doubt flashing titties at them will cause them to freeze up like last time.' There were also two more pairs of Musk warriors in their line and they didn't look any less formidable than Mint and Lime.

The patronus herd was beginning to move closer. The Musk warriors surveyed the spectral deer for a moment before discounting them as a threat.

Harry heard the one in the middle start to yell at Ranma. Well, looks like these guys didn't care to speak English around guests like that Phoenix woman did. How rude.

Harry put five pools between her and them. Time for some defensive magic. Pity she didn't bring her invisibility cloak to China with her. Harry cast a weak muggle repelling charm and a notice-me-not charm and one of the lackeys on the end seemed to react to her spells by looking around more. Harry decided to slowly pick her way deeper into the pools just in case they remembered where she disappeared from.

_"Dammit, Herb, why can__'__t you just chuck a tiger into the Drowned-Girl spring and be done with it. That's how you Musk idiots normally get laid anyway."_

Ranma was somewhat concerned. She knew her own abilities but just couldn't tell how well Harry's magic would do against the Musk after only a few days of cross training. On the plus side, she was about to get her first chance to go all out in a long while.

_"When you are the son of a dragon, other animal blood lines lose their appeal. But by taking that girl, my children will have magic. I will soon be the King of the Musk, and my son will reign over the Joketsuzoku and the Phoenix as well. Get out of my way or I will allow my warriors to violate what's left of your body after I have broken your spirit!"_

Ranma considered those fighting words. She had some for him too. _"Die in a fire."_

Herb leapt towards Ranma who chose to meet him halfway. The other six Musk warriors ran for the pools. Herb and Ranma both ignored the traditional exchange of fists and feet in favor of ki-formed weapons. Their forms blurred over the grass, yellow-gold light following behind Herb's ki sword while a bright blue trail followed every move of Ranma's ki claws. Overcoming her old Cat-Fist training and its subsequent fear of cats had been a major bonus for her advanced ki mastery. And the foot long glowing claws were cool as hell.

After a furious exchange on the ground, Herb went airborn expecting Ranma to be stuck on the ground just like last time. 'Sucker.' Ranma leapt after him. Even before Ranma mastered ki manipulation, her Family School had always been based on aerial combat. Now, Ranma used quick bursts of ki in her feet, infusing ki into the local air just enough to create an invisible stepping stone.

As the two ki masters traded one lethal strike after another, Harry lead a unique game of Hide and Seek with the other Musk warriors. The muggle-repeller and notice-me-not both seemed to be working though she could tell that the hunters had quickly followed her steps and scent as far as where she cast those charms. They were having trouble past that. They soon spread out in a radial pattern and appeared to be checking every bit of exposed ground for invisible people. Her patronus herd was attempting to interfere by crowding around each Musk warrior whenever they stood still long enough. Pity that patroni couldn't actually touch living beings even when made by a crystal scepter that, if the Phoenix were to be believed, was not only magical but from the Moon.

Ranma and Herb were leaping and sprinting over ground and through the air, but neither one felt inclined to drift too far from the pools. Both had an interest in how the Hide and Seek game turned out.

Herb was beginning to worry about his warriors. Why didn't they have the bitch already? He could sense her and yet all six men were in a search they normally used to hunt for spies and assassins. If they didn't get her soon he'd just have to do it himself.

Ranma was actually just as surprised as Herb that Harry hadn't needed to use any of her shields or hexes yet. Like Herb she knew exactly where Harry was. Neither one realized that this was the difference between a ki master and an otherwise normal if elite warrior. Harry wasn't hiding her ki at all, just masking her presence in the physical world.

Harry was starting to get antsy. A warrior was on the opposite bank of the same pool she was next to. She'd already tried to apparate once after remembering how she got to China in the first place but just couldn't seem to do it. The warrior knelt down and seemed to be examining one of her foot impressions.

Think quick Harry.

Her hand brushed over one of her pockets, so she re-examined what she had with her. Wand... pull it out. Jeweled choker... leave it there. No telling what that thing would do if she actually put it on. Then there was... ah ha! A Canary Cream! She slowly lowered the pranking product to the ground and slipped further away.

Ranma had worked up a good sweat by now. And she'd gotten a few scratches too. Maybe a bruised rib or two as well but damn was this ever fun! She hadn't been near this good last time she and Herb fought and time made all the difference. She even tried to flash her chest at Herb once to see if he still had such an easy weak spot to exploit. He didn't even notice except to remark offhand that he'd be more than willing to 'give Ranma what she wanted' after breaking her arms and legs. Arrogant shit must not be a virgin anymore. Poor girl, whoever she was.

Both masters began trading ki projectiles after the blade duel ended in a draw. The guide's hut was missing a corner, the forest was on fire and one old spring had been blown to hell. Two new imprintable springs would be replacing it in a few days once the water level evened out. Due to the curse waters mixing, if anyone fell in the next spring over in the next few days, they'd get the Ashura-hamster curse. Freaky.

Back by Harry, the nearest warrior found the Weasley prank candy. As he picked it up and smelled it, another warrior leapt over to his side.

'Bloody hell! I can't jump like that!'

Harry got ready to cast her physical shield spell with the scepter. After the second warrior sniffed at the candy, he put it back on the ground. Bollocks!' Harry's stalkers were only ten meters away. They were now too close for comfort. She cast the shield spell.

All six warriors saw the translucent yellow-white dome snap into place over a section of ground maybe 5 meters in diameter. The two closer warriors tried to force their way into the shield by raw muscle power and failed. The other four had quickly closed to form a loose circle where only one pool separated each man from the girl they were trying to subdue.

Harry was tired of being playing the coy damsel. She knew that this shield would keep itself up and it would allow hexes to pass right through as it was a shield against physical attacks rather than magical ones. She traded the scepter for her wand, carefully targeted the closest warrior and incanted -

"Stupefy!"

The monster of a man who looked to be over two meters tall caught it in the chest. He didn't fall unconscious but he did lose his balance.

**-SPLASH-**

That one was Spring-of-Drowned-Wolf-Spider if the eight legged furball climbing out of the water was any indication. Hairy bastards, Ron would have really freaked out.

The other warriors each eye'd the local terrain looking for ways to dodge.

Hermione was particularly proud of this next one as it appeared indirectly in the old movie _Wizard of Oz_. "Avis Simianus Fecalis!"

And lo, monkeys did fly out of the warrior's arse. The fearsome Flying Shit-monkey Hex wherein turds pulled themselves from your bowels in the form of winged monkeys, flied about your head and flung themselves at you. Ginny would be so jealous of that one. The warrior in the middle of a flock of shit-monkeys chose to retreat two pools back and regroup.

A cloud of poisoned darts impacted the side of Harry's shield without getting through. She began hurling stunners and Reducto's out of the shield hoping to get some room and to scare them away.

Herb had had enough. He maneuvered his battle with Ranma onto the edge of the pools and made a sharp whistle. Before Ranma could take advantage of the minor break, all four Musk warriors who were either not a spider or in need of clean armor had touched down between Herb and Ranma. All four of them launched a coordinated pattern against the red headed ki master while Herb jumped right at Harry's shield in one massive leap.

What Harry wouldn't have given for a good broom at any time during this cock up. She was a sitting duck and she knew it. Were it not for her Scepter of Prissiness and it's incredible shield spells, she would have been taken prisoner already. Suddenly all four of her attackers disappeared. She didn't have a good feeling about suddenly being alone in the middle of these bloody magic pools. Wait, what was that blur?

Ranma was doing pretty good, but still hadn't landed a critical hit on his opponent. Herb had insanely deep wells of ki to draw from and while Ranma estimated that she was more than half-way through her own stores, she had come up with two possible ways of putting the Musk Prince down for good if only she could satisfy the opening requirements. Then the Musk went and changed the rules on her. Lime, Mint and the other two she didn't recognize appeared before her and Herb took off like a blur for Harry's position. Not good. Ranma's subconscious began to calculate ambush options for the most likely routes back to Musk lands as she beat through the screen of warriors.

Harry's first clue that things had gone to shit were the bright flaring of her shield and the thick fingers grasping her throat. She didn't even notice that she'd been pushed back so that one foot dangled over a cursed pool. Herb pulled her back to land and roughly shoved Harry to her knees. Harry was starting to miss the oxygen she had taken for granted not ten seconds ago. She brought up her holly and phoenix feather wand, hoping that it would save her once more. Herb snatched it out of her grasp and stuck the wand behind her right ear. If not for the Chinese warrior squeezing life out of her, Harry thought that she would look like a close cousin to Luna Lovegood right about now what with her blond hair and a wand behind her ear. Herb stared at the crystal pendant resting atop Harry's cleavage and growled something in his own dialect. She imagined that those words might have well been 'shut up and do as you're told'.

Ranma touched down one spring distant from where Herb was busy crushing Harry's windpipe. _"Let her go, Herb!"_

Herb, having cowed the sorceress to his satisfaction, looked over to Ranma in triumph. _"One more step, Ranma. One more move from you and I snap her neck. Then you will take her place in my bed tonight."_

As the ki masters stared at each other looking for some kind of weakness, Harry's left hand grasped the handle of her scepter, which was still hanging from her belt. Her brain was being deprived of oxygen and all higher level thought was slipping away.

One desperate last thought echoed through her mind, 'HELP!'

The crystal shaft at Harry's waist and the crystal crescent above her bust flared together. A half second later the surface of a particular pool bubbled and hissed as a recently ensnared spirit broke free from her prison.

The spirit of Usagi Tsukino, aka Sailor Moon, Moon Princess and Meatball Head, was pissed. There was NO WAY that smelly, dirty, rough barbarian was touching her perfect body any more than he already had. That poor boy who fell in her spring was blacking out. Perfect. She floated right behind the boy-turned-girl-turned-victim and slipped into the body she had worn for eighteen years.

Both ki masters looked over to Harry when a bright gold light flare on her forehead. The light formed an upturned crescent moon.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!"

Herb never had a girl undergo a naked whirly light show wardrobe change in his grasp before. Ranma, being in and out of Tokyo for years knew exactly what he was seeing. _"No fucking way!"_

Sailor Moon's position wasn't much better than Harry's before she possessed the struggling witch. Luckily, Herb had been struck dumb by the short yet erotic strip tease he'd just witnessed. With only seconds to act before she too would pass out, Moon held the Kaleidomoon Scope, or Scepter of Prissiness to the boys, right under Herb's chin and released a pure burst of her power without the use of any attack phrase.

Herb went sailing to the far side of the Pools of Sorrow and splashed down in a random pool. Ranma almost wished Akane's greedy older sister was around so he could place a bet on Herb's new cursed form. New as in he already had one, of course. While Herb hadn't changed during the fight, Ranma knew that Herb had the same curse she had; a girl curse. Ironic considering that Herb was the worst male chauvinist pig Ranma's ever known. She should know too, as she had grown up with the traditional Japanese sexist views herself until her own visit with the Titty Fairy of Jusenkyo. Ranma Saotome had been a real man among men until he became a woman part time.

When Herb finally did emerge from the cursed spring, Ranma knew karma had struck yet again. Princess Herb was a delightfully curvy bunny-girl. Must have been Spring-of-Drowned-Rabbit that she fell in and mixed with his girl curse. Herb's escort, those that were still standing at least, began to look at her as predators would prey. Bunnies are not known for being deadly creatures after all.

As Herb made a hasty exit followed by the amorous Musk warriors, Ranma turned back to Harry. Harry was Harry again, not Sailor Moon. She was also out cold while a ghost who could be her twin looked down on her with concern. The ghost then looked up at Ranma with confusion clearly written on her spectral face. Ranma did what she always does when she was nervous. She reached behind her head and began to play with her long red braid.

_"I'm Ranma Saotome. Sorry about this."_

**End Chapter**

REV 7/2012


	6. So Long and Thanks For All the Fish

**Chapter Six: So Long and Thanks For All the Fish**

Still August 5th, 1996

Severus Snape stalked into the Headmaster's office. It was early, too early even to interrupt breakfast service, when the Potions Master was urgently summoned to the Headmaster. Severus would have loved to be elsewhere were it not for his three duties. One duty to Dumbledore, one duty to Voldemort and duty one to the Potter brat much as he would like his freedom from all three. Alas, he was not free to do as he wished.

"You asked for me, Headmaster?"

Albus Dumbledore turned from the twisting, spinning and smoking silver contraptions on his desk before him to look at his close confidant.

"Ah, good morning. Yes, Severus, I did indeed send word for you. You see, I have detected young Mister Potter casting with his wand again. From his spell selection, I suspect we may soon be in for a show."

Severus raised one eyebrow and chose to answer the unasked question. "I was not made aware of any attempts by the Dark Lord's followers to attack today. As before, Lucius was sent with a few new recruits to bribe a Chinese wizard or two that he has had dealings with. I suspect they are close to finding him, as they have moved from the comfort of a bordello in Hong Kong to an inland magical village."

"Well if they have yet to locate Harry then perhaps his location might be revealed in a moment of weakness?" Albus returned his gaze to the devices. Harry had just cast a stupefy and then a hex unlike any from his previous practice sessions. "Oh, my. That one has Miss Granger's signature all over it."

"I will be sure to let My Lord know exactly what secrets 'that doddering old fool' has let slip this time."

Severus also began to watch as the blood based wand tracer continued to describe a rather hectic pace of stunners and blasting curses, telling one side of a duel of some sort.

"I'm not impressed Albus. He casts no shield and those curses are too close to be cast on the move. Against any decent Death Eater, he'd be singing for the Cruciatus curse right about now. Thirty points from Gryffindor."

"Now, now Severus, you can't take points during the summer break."

"Then I shall catch him as soon as he enters the castle, assuming the little cockroach still breathes come September first." Potions Master Snape did not seem to think this was likely. He made to leave, but the Headmaster seemed to have something else on his mind.

"One moment more, if you please." Snape looked again to the Headmaster. "Have you seen to my request?"

"Yes Albus. Six timed Lesser Amorentia doses, stepped in dosage. Polyjuice, a wizard's dozen. Confusing Concoction, a wizard's dozen." Severus showed no outward emotion yet he was intrigued. "Headmaster, I must ask... who is the lucky witch?"

Albus _almost _blushed. "I have finally found a witch bright enough to take one of life's greater gambles on. Yes, yes... seeing how well she has kept Mister Potter alive and in line these past few years deserves a reward. And though I may be old I still remember enough about my once youthful appearance to know who can be tricked into being the 'father' until my child is ready to learn the truth."

Snape's brow rose slightly. "You're going to force Weasley on Granger? After you take her yourself?"

Something evil happened. Snape became happy. He laughed. This was a sad day in the history of Wizarding Britain. Slowly, Snape calmed down so that he could once again speak without coughing.

"Please Headmaster, if that is a reward, I want only to be punished in the future."

"As you wish." Albus answered, eyes twinkling in the early morning light.

Severus Snape accepted his dismissal and left the Headmaster's office whistling a nearly jaunty funeral dirge. Snape was sure his hated Marauder rivals would have never appreciated the beauty of this prank. It would be as if James Bloody Potter had been forced to raise the child of Lily and Severus. Well, it would be if Potter were a knutless, unpopular fool. Severus wanted to know if the Little Miss Know-It-All could escape becoming the next Molly Weasley. Oh, next year was going to be so delightful.

* * *

Voldemort sat on his throne.

This morning he was alone save for a dying human. He? She? One could be forgiven for not knowing if it were male or female due to the mutilations bestowed upon this miserable soul. The Dark Lord always thought that the breaking-up stage of a relationship was the best part and this last 'girlfriend' had the honor of entertaining him for five weeks straight. A new record. Perhaps her sister could do better... no matter, for a new game had made itself known to him. He had successfully been able to use his playtime constructively and channel his skill and his substantial magical power to find Potter's mind.

"So the rumors are true." He muttered to the room in general. His one guest would not be giving away his secrets. She would be dead soon. "He is somewhere in Asia. Fish, rice and pickles, eh? Enjoy one of your last meals Potter.'

Voldemort continued to simply watch, content to wait for useful information to present itself. It wouldn't do to let the little shit know he has a visitor, lest he try to evict Voldemort again. As he watched, a trio of odd winged beings landed before Harry.

'Well. I should have expected to see people such as these after first learning of the Veela. I'll have to get a couple and figure out how their wings work. Do they scream or squawk?'

The winged woman appeared to be talking, but the Dark Lord's vision did not clear up enough to hear distinct words. Soon the half-breeds left, and Harry and this red headed woman appeared to go their separate ways; Harry stepping into an odd collection of springs. Such an innocent looking place. Pathetic.

The almost corpse on the floor made a weak moan. Voldemort briefly focused on his newest Ex for one last exchange of heartfelt emotion.

"Crucio!" Her moan got a little louder before cresting and then sliding into that final Last Breath. Voldemort did not make a habit of smiling but his face did show satisfaction in a job well done. Back to Harry.

'Oh, ho! I do so love a good fight. Look at these lowborn freaks dodging his spell fire. Pathetic. They even look afraid to get a little wet.' Voldemort's mouth fell open when a man seemed to appear in Harry's view and grab the Potter Shit by his neck.

'Foolish boy. How could you let him get so close, Harry? It's really a miracle you lived so lo- AAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Voldemort's scream echoed off the cold stone walls as an incredible pain seared both his forehead and his black soul. A blinding light burst forth from his skull for a brief second before the Dark Lord collapsed back into his throne. A small patch of skin shaped like an upturned crescent moon in the center of his forehead had been turned to char. As he lost consciousness, he couldn't help the feeling that he was somehow smaller, less than he had been just moments before.

* * *

None of the greater magical communities anywhere in China escaped the Ki Adept sweeps of Zhou Wu Wang's allies, but a lone outpost or two managed to survive the countless centuries with their warding intact. It was in one of these truly ancient lodges that Lucius Malfoy rested with a handful of his fellow blood purists and bathed in their own hypocrisy.

"Look at this filth." He gestured around himself, catching the attention of his 'brothers'. "This is supposed to be a magical house? Where are the house elves? Where are the porcelain plates and gold finery? And I thought this was supposed to be a pureblood house. Even blood traitors like Weasley live better than this."

Their host had servant girls seeing to his guests every need but it was not good enough for a Malfoy. At least that was Lucius's opinion. The girls did not clean as well as a house elf, nor were they as curvy as the average British halfblood prostitute. Malfoy ignored the fact that he still took the girl who had been assigned to care for him and she did not complain. Maybe that was the problem... no challenge, no resistance. No victory. Would he have understood the irony of knowing her own blood status?

While the Malfoys and their 'pure' allies could trace their magical lineage back three to five centuries easily, they had nothing on Mei of the Shang Family. Being born a girl in a traditional house was what sentenced her to this life of subservience, but her blood was far more 'pure' than Malfoy could boast. If she had been born a male, Mei would have been one of the most respected magicals in China. Her family lines extended over three millennia. Her ancestors looked down on emperors. Still she was a girl and her brothers were not. That is why they learned what magic was still taught in China and Mei was sold to another magical family now seeing to Malfoy's _every _need. She also understood English very well. She had wondered why the non-magical people she lived near were so hateful of light skinned men. Now that Mei has met one she's become a true believer in the notion of racial hatred.

Mei left Malfoy's side to refresh the tea service. Were it not for her sense of family honor, she would have poisoned the tea and rid her Master's house of these foul beasts. And yet, Master had invited them.

"Honorable Sir, I have found the child you seek." Her Master had entered with good news. "My cousin near the Mongolian border has found you're wayward heir."

The Death Eaters and their host spent an hour discussing where the 'heir' had been spotted and how best to retrieve him. It would take some hours to acquire and use the necessary portkeys and be ready to confront Harry. At the earliest, it would be two in the morning. A surprise night assault. Perfect.

Mei saw the gold Malfoy gave to her Master for services rendered but she felt no better. As the light skinned men left, Mei went to the Family shrine, honored her ancestors, and prayed for those men to live Interesting lives. Pity, she would not learn of Malfoy's upcoming adventure in her lifetime. She would have approved.

* * *

A pair of blue eyes opened to see another pair of blue eyes not half a meter away. "Welcome back, Your Worshipfulness!"

Harry had to think for a moment. She'd heard that one before, she was sure of it. Ah! "I am not a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission from Alderan. I'm quite sure that happened in a galaxy far, far away and not on our very own Moon."

The Boy-Who-Lived was sure that Luke Skywalker had a better childhood than he did. At least the Jedi didn't have a prophecy about him. "What time is it?"

Harry finally took notice of his surroundings. It helped that Ranma had been kind enough to set Harry's glasses back on her face. It was getting dark outside, from what Harry could see through the door. Correction, from what she could see of the door behind Shampoo, another woman with a sword over her back, and a positively ancient looking woman no taller than Dobby who seemed to be enjoying tea with her soup. The living mummy chose to get things going again.

"Geetings young wizard. I am Cologne, an Elder of Joketsuzoku. I believe you have met Shampoo, my great-granddaughter, and Kotex is guarding the door. Allow me to apologize to you for not arriving early enough to assist you in declining the Musk Prince's rather indecent proposal." Cologne sat down her tea and looked at the accidental blonde.

Harry answered her. "Well, perhaps I could join you for dinner? I could eat a troll just about now."

Harry got out of the Guide's bed and staggered over to the table. Not that it was very far, they were in a hut after all. Ranma set himself a bowl next to Harry and began to retrieve portions of a hearty local soup out of a larger serving dish. Harry and Ranma both got a few spoonfuls of soup in before Harry noticed that she hadn't been very polite since waking up. She put down her spoon and briefly bowed to the elder.

"Please excuse my rudeness Elder. I have had an unusual week."

Cologne nodded back and let a small grin show. "Think nothing of it, young man. Why there was a time when this uncivilized brute next to you would have sooner kicked me than bowed to me."

"And that time can come again any time you want a rematch, Granny! **-BONK- **Ow!" Ranma had just received the dreaded Stick-to-the-Head. A technique not unlike the somewhat better known Boot-to-the-Head. "I let you do that..."

Harry giggled. 'Oh, shit! I just giggled like a girl! The curse must be really getting to me!' The others at the table saw how Harry abruptly stopped giggling like a girl and held her hands over her mouth with a panicked look in her eyes.

This one Ranma could handle… as soon as he stopped rubbing the fresh knot on his head.

"You are not 'going girl' Harry. Our curses don't work that way."

"Really?" Harry answered uncertainly.

"Really. I thought it was happening to me once or twice. Almost fell apart when my curse got locked for nearly a month straight once, but I realized that the few small things that can change never change who I am inside."

"But how are you sure? I've seen enough magic to know that you don't always know when you've gone mental."

Ranma thought for a moment. "Okay. I have a simple test that can tell if you are going girl. Ready?"

"Ready." Harry managed to say though it was a blatant lie.

Harry was sure she'd be knitting sweaters with Mrs. Weasley in no time up in her mental panic room. The Amazons stayed quiet, as it appeared Ranma was showing signs of maturity and they didn't want to interfere in such a rare display.

"One: What do you see when you look at me now."

"I see a good friend who can kick serious ass. You must meet Malfoy one day. Honestly, it must happen."

"I promise it will happen. Back to the test. Two: What do you see when you look at me and I have read hair?"

"Tits and ass... and then I remember that there is a bloke in there and that stops my perving."

"Is that always what you see when I have red hair and yours is blonde?"

"Yeah."

Ranma looked briefly around the room before settling on the next question. "You're a girl right now Harry. If you thought you could bed Shampoo and not have to worry about it in the future, would you?"

Harry took a long lecherous look at the purple haired vixen. "Bloody hells, yes! I'd shag her rotten."

Shampoo playfully winked at Harry and Ranma. She knew she was good looking and she knew others wanted what she had. She also saw Ranma pause a moment at the blonde's honest answer. 'Was that a bit of jealousy I saw?' She didn't say anything, but kept her gaze firmly on the young ki master.

Ranma pulled himself together. "I believe we've gone far enough. The point is, you don't change mentally. The curse makes you look different. The curse changes how you sound. It can even change your stance, poise and walk. These are all physical things. You get some instincts too, enough to keep your new body working, but those instincts go away when you change back. It does not make you think like a real girl. I would have noticed years ago if it did. And gods forbid you ever fall in one but there really are personality changing pools. Would you rather have fallen in the Spring-of-Drowned-Blushing-Bride?"

Harry shuddered. Had she fallen in that one and not met Ranma, she no doubt would have already become Mrs. Snape by now. And then Mrs. Snape would have murdered her husband and killed herself the minute that she found hot water and became a he again.

Shampoo saw the young wizard-turned-witch's reaction to the bride spring and thought it time to change topics. "You two done talking about how much you'd like to 'shag' me, yes?" The 'boys' looked down and blushed.

Harry's gaze went anywhere but towards the people she had been talking to. She idly thanked whatever god chose to dump her in China for picking an area that had a remarkable number of English speakers. She had gotten a hint of how much travel was involved in martial arts training and therefore how important being multi-lingual was. Once again he wished he had some magic up to the task. The universal translator ring continued to sit in a bag and do nothing. Harry started to look at the detailing of the soup pot as Cologne sought to set the conversation back on track.

"You children can discuss mating with each other later. For now, I am quite curious to hear of your feud with the Musk warriors after lunch." She looked over to Ranma. "I have heard from this hooligan about how his fight with the Musk Prince went. Ranma also described what he saw of you from a distance and the end of the engagement. I would love to hear your side of things as well as the Spirit's story."

Harry had seen a pot like that before, but where. She'd never been to China before so – now just wait one bleedin' minute. What spirit? "Wait. What spirit?"

"The one behind you. A Miss Tsukino, I believe?" Harry could put the soup dish on hold for a minute. She turned around.

Usagi had been bored, bored, bored. Floating about outside was no fun, so she had opted to hang out with the living people. When the girl, sorry boy, with her body woke up, she... he... whatever, went straight to the table and completely missed her. Then Usagi had to sit through them all speaking English. Bummer. She had barely gotten her English scores above a failing grade right before she took a swim in that damned spring. All she could do was look at her body and admire how good she looked as someone else. Wait... ewwwww, that's like wanting to do it with your twin or your sister or something. Stop it, brain. Could ghosts use bleach on their brains to burn out certain thoughts? Suddenly, the extra her turned around and stared at Usagi. She wanted to make a good first impression, so she put on her best smile, politely bowed and greeted this 'Harry'.

"Konbanwa, Haa-reee-san! Watashi wa Tsukino Usagi desu!"

'So, to summarize. I practiced magic as a girl today. I giggled like a girl today. I fought as a witch and got strangled by a man who looked like he wanted to make me a woman. I passed out like a damsel in distress. I wake up hungry and light headed and get introduced to a dead girl who I recognize now sometimes when I look in the mirror. I fell in the Spring-of-Drowned-HER. I've seen her starkers. Hey, why can't I see anymore?'

Harry fainted like a, well, like girls used to when they wore those damn tight corsets all the time. Some English purebloods still do.

Harry wouldn't have understood what she said next, but he would have got the tone of it. _"Hey, you can't just faint in my body! Did you break my nose? You better not have broken my nose! Quit bleeding on my hair, you jerk!"_

Harry woke to pain stemming from her... no, wait.. his nose. There seemed to be a mildly fragrant ointment spread on the bridge of his nose. That ointment was now on his fingers too as he just had to scratch an itch. He opened his eyes to see a greenish yellow paste covering parts of his face and hands. Harry fought back the urge to taste it even though it did smell a lot better than anything that Madam Pomfrey pushed at him in the Hogwarts Hospital wing.

Ranma placed another bowl of soup on Harry's lap in bed. "Please finish your dinner before you faint on us again, Princess."

Harry gave Ranma a two fingered salute before finishing off the hearty meal in short order. Once his bowl was empty, Ranma took the bowl and placed it back on the table. Harry then rolled into a sitting position. He was still a little light headed but felt pretty good otherwise.

Cologne and Shampoo re-entered the hut. It was now dark outside. If it weren't for his hunger and their guests, Harry would have just slept on until morning.

Cologne spoke up. "We have a guard posted. I assure you that you are now safe from Prince Herb and his Musk warriors. In fact, I dare say Herb may be too busy escaping his own men to be any risk to us. Still, we Amazons do not temp fate if we can avoid it."

"Thank you Elder." Harry bowed from her position in bed.

Cologne smiled kindly before asking a question. "Would you be so kind as to explain the recent battle from your perspective? Ranma is as thorough as ever yet he is as curious as I am about how you were able to hold off the Musk warriors for as long as you did."

Cologne looked over Harry's shoulder. Harry followed her gaze and saw that his ghost-twin was sitting shyly behind him looking a bit confused. Maybe she couldn't speak English then?

The elder continued. "I suspect you will also want to hear Miss Tsukino's story. I do too, for that matter. We rarely get to meet a spring's first victim."

Harry began to tell his tale. He started with lunch and then Kiima. Ranma was kind enough to translate for Usagi, who was just as interested in his tale as anyone. Harry was cute, after all. As soon as Harry explained the origins of the Phoenix tribe, Usagi was hooked. This boy was talking about the Moon Kingdom! A pendant that belonged to an Aunt Usagi didn't even remember? Awesome! Oh, my god! Hey! Ranma!

Harry stopped his story when the ghost girl behind him started squealing and doing that high-speed talking thing that only teenage girls were any good at. Ranma had apparently told her to slow her down twice, as she did try ease off near the end of her squealing. Whatever she said, the Amazons seemed to have taken note of it.

"Harry," Cologne started, "Would you mind pulling out that necklace that Kiima presented you with? Miss Tsukino seems to know some of the history of this ancient battle and would like to see your new crystal pendant."

Almost without thought, Harry dipped his.. her hands into a water pitcher she recognized from lunch and called the pendant to her. It obeyed her will and appeared around her neck much to the amazement of the Amazons and the ghost. Usagi seemed to go mental. Ranma and Cologne had to calm the ghost down before her gibbering even remotely sounded like the rapid speaking she used before. After about three minutes they finally got her to stop, though Harry could tell that Usagi was just bursting at the seams.

"It looks like the spring you fell into, Mister Potter, was far more rare and unusual than most. However, you have a story to finish before we can deal with this very special spirit. Please continue."

So Harry did. She told them of her spellcasting with wand and scepter. Usagi's eyes bugged out when Harry pulled out the scepter and showed it off like a new toy. She talked about leading the warriors around and about the failed trap. After talking about her offensive and her sudden lack of air due to strangulation, she ended with her desperate wish for help and blacking out.

After Harry finished her tale, Ranma translating for Usagi the whole time, Usagi knew it was her turn. This time Ranma translated back into English. She started with being 'totally grossed out' at seeing that 'dirty filthy brute' touching Harry's cursed form. The others seemed to understand when she identified herself as 'Sailor Moon' not that it meant anything to him. She talked about blasting the Musk Prince clear across the pools and seeing the Musk bunny-girl flee.

"But why didn't they try again?" That ended a little too quickly in Harry's opinion.

Cologne again took up the explanation so that Ranma could continue translating. "It must have been a shock to Herb to be thrown so easily, but one he could have recovered from. No, it was the new curse which turned the tables. You see, Herb is the not just a Prince in a kingdom where women are merely breeding stock and bed warmers. He is also the son of a dragon that was tossed into the Spring-of-Drowned-Girl and permanently locked into that form. This gives Herb great strength and natural talents that make him a formidable opponent. He was strong enough to keep his position even after falling into a cursed pool and becoming a girl part-time like you and Ranma. This all changed the minute Herb landed in another spring and his curse changed. Rabbits are about as far from dragons as you can get on the power scale. Herb's cursed form now screams 'prey' to the instincts of the other Musk warriors and instincts trump orders in their poorly developed minds. They follow the strong and the powerful. Herb as a bunny-girl is neither. They may suffer his displeasure when he finds more hot water, but until then she may as well carry a sign that says 'take me' so long as 'she' is in the presence of other Musk."

"So that's the last we'll see of him?" Harry could still feel the fingers around her throat. Not fun.

"We set up a guard as I said, but I doubt we will hear from him before you are ready to leave the valley. Until then, you have my promise as an Amazon Elder that we will aid you should he show himself again."

As dark as it had become, Harry begged off demonstrations of her magic for tomorrow and the unique group meeting in the Jusenkyo guide's hut made camp for the night.

* * *

Usagi couldn't go to sleep.

'Duh, I'm, like, a ghost.'

Instead of just watching the British boy who looked just like her sleep all night long, she started floating about to get a better above water view of this place that swallowed her whole. Tree. Tree. Water. Tree. Masked Bad Man. Tree. Wait a second. Who was that masked bad man and what was a 'kuru-shi-oh'?

The Death Eaters had portkeyed within two hundred yards of the hut and had been stalking up the edge of the pools towards their objective. The Amazon picket spotted them immediately, but chose to report rather than attack. Now the four wizards had come across a wandering ghost. She seemed to look past them for a moment and the English wizards had enough experience with wandering ghosts to ignore them.

Then she seemed to stop and look at them again.

Lucius knew that this girl could do nothing to harm them and she shouldn't really know enough about them to raise any kind of alarm. Unfortunately for Lucius, his fellow purebloods were not all as intelligent as he was and set about proving the 'bad' in 'masked bad man'.

"Crucio!"

The unforgivable passed right through the ghost as Lucius knew it would. If the Death Eaters were lucky, then those sleeping inside the Hut would still be caught unawares when Malfoy breached any wards they may have set up. Unfortunately for Lucius and his friends, they didn't even consider it possible for Harry to be staying with muggles and therefore they never cast any muggle repelling charms or notice-me-not's.

Before Lucius could cuff the dim thug next to him, the young man went silent. It could have something to do with the three arrows sticking out of his chest. Make that five. Nine arrows.

Lucius drew his wand and threw himself to the side. Lucius cast a severing charm behind Thug Number Two just as two shiny steel blades emerged from his stomach, twisted and slid behind him again. At least he got the bitch judging by the higher pitched grunt at impact. That was his last thought before blacking out from a pressure point strike to the neck.

Harry woke to the sounds of yelling outside. He saw the reflection of a colored light flashing in the distance.

'Was that a diffindo? Shite.'

She rolled out of bed and grabbed her wand. She was not keen on discovering if the scepter could cast a shield capable of blocking unforgivables. She ran outside leaving only the guide snoring behind her. By the time she reached the site of all of the yelling, the conflict was over and only the wounded, prisoners and the dead were left to deal with.

Usagi floated right in front of Harry and started gabbering at an insane rate. "Ranma! I need a translator if you have the time!"

"Usagi wants you to heal the wounded Amazon." Ranma grabbed Harry's wrist and pulled her over to a middle aged woman who had a wicked gash splitting her right hip and thigh open clear to the bone. "She wants you to pull out the scepter and fix that wound."

Harry looked at it and froze. Could she heal that? Could the Healers at St. Mungo's? Would muggle medicine be better? Surely they didn't think Harry could fix _that_. Ranma must have seen her face.

"Or... you could let Usagi back in and she'll do it."

"But I don't know how she got in the first time! Ask her how I do the spell then."

There was a brief exchange in Japanese. "You focus all your love of life and mankind and push it into the wound. She says there are no words, just your need to heal."

'Sounds simple enough. I made two forests without even trying' Harry walked up to the woman on the ground and pulled out her scepter. Three Amazons backed off upon seeing the Wizard draw her scepter, figuring they were about to see some magic. Shampoo remained holding the worst of the injury closed. "Shampoo. Please wait until you see my magic start working before moving back. I'm not sure how quickly this is going to happen."

Harry saw the Amazon nod. She got down on her knees before the injured woman and pointed the scepter directly at the wound. She began to concentrate. Love. Health. This woman will die if I don't fix this.

Usagi began to coach Harry through Ranma's translating skills. "Think of this woman running and laughing. Think of her giving birth. She is a warrior. Close your eyes and watch her fight. She's teaching her own children to kick and to punch."

Harry concentrated on the images that Ranma brought up. The woman kicking, punching, going about daily life with a smile on her face. Harry wanted that to be real. Harry knew almost nothing about love, but she wanted to learn. She wanted to know love and life and she wanted a life beyond these damn dark wizards. Harry was going to have her happy ending and so was this woman! Now, Get Better Damn You!

The other Amazons were a bit apprehensive when the foreign girl got on her knees and pointed that sparkling rod at their sister. After ten or fifteen seconds went by with no change in their Sister's condition, they began to think that this was a bad idea. Suddenly, there was a bright flare from within the crystal shaft and everyone not on picket duty heard Harry's magic words.

"Get better, damn you!"

And the injured warrior did. As Shampoo leapt out of the way the gaping wound pulled closed as if it were zipped shut. It left no scar behind. Apparently, that alone did not satisfy the spell parameters as the Amazon kept getting better. As a middle aged warrior, Dove had collected quite a number of scars, calluses and other ailments typical to the hard fighting hard drinking warrior woman's lifestyle. Scars disappeared. Calluses faded. Her liver wasn't about to fail anymore. That chronic cough that had plagued Dove for four years was gone.

"Get better, damn you?" Ranma snorted. "Really, Blondie. What stupid kind of spell is 'get better, damn you'?" Ranma translated the 'spell' for Usagi and the ghost girl started to roll around giggling.

Harry blushed. That did sound kind of lame when you put it that way.

The patient got up and started checking her joints and range of motion. When Dove started commenting on how she felt to her Amazon sisters more then one got a feral look in her eyes when re-examining the girl they knew to be a Jusenkyo cursed boy. True, 'he' was no warrior and his muscles were unimpressive but surely his children would have magic like his, right? Picking a fight and losing to might be worth it to take this foreigner for a husband.

Harry saw some of those looks and became very uncomfortable. And he she was really knackered too. She made her excuses and turned in.

On the way back to bed, Ranma had one last thing to say to the unsteady blonde. "Remember Harry, don't fight any of these women tomorrow. Not for any reason. I'm pretty sure they'll lose on purpose now after that demonstration."

"Bloody wonderful." Well, it may have translated to 'good night' in the United States or Australia or some where for all she knew.

Harry went unconscious. Again.

* * *

"One moment, Arthur dear." Molly called.

Arthur had been about to leave the table. Dinner was finished and all of her 'babies' were off to their rooms or in the yard or whatever it is children do when they aren't allowed to leave the property because of the threat of dark wizards.

Molly had to do _something_. Hermione was driving everyone mental with the lack of new reading material in the Burrow.

"Have you put your wages in the vault for this month?"

"Yes Molly, Love. I told you it was a mistake to go off to Gringotts early didn't I?" Arthur answered.

"I just wanted to keep the children safe... and with Harry off Merlin knows where how is he supposed to be ready for Hogwarts again at the end of the month?"

She began levitating the last scraps of dessert over to the sink where the charms could take care of any remaining bits before Ron was tempted to clean the plates with his tongue. Well, it was only that one time when he was seven. And then again at twelve. And then twice yesterday...

"We'll just have to tell the Headmaster about Harry's key. Though I do wonder why they took it in the first place. You'd pulled some galleons from his account before. It's not like a young boy can be trusted with the responsibility of a vault key." Arthur offered.

Molly huffed. "The nerve... suggesting I'd steal from Harry. He's like one of my own! And it wouldn't be so hectic around here if they all had their supplies for next year. Hermione, angel that she is, wouldn't drive Ronald batty if she had another book or two to draw her interest."

"Merlin, that is one young witch who could use Grandad's old pipe blend." Arthur picked up a copy of Popular Mechanics. Not that he could understand any of what was discussed, but he tried so hard.

"I thought you didn't want her to know about that mix. You know the muggles don't approve of it."

"Muggle-made drugs do far worse." Arthur answered. "How can they think so poorly of such a useful herb."

"Perhaps I'll make some special cauldron cakes for her tomorrow night then. I'll use your Grandmother's recipe. Calm the poor dear right down, it will."

* * *

August 6th, 1996

Today was not a good day to wake up in the loving embrace of Joketsuzoku guards. Lucius Malfoy and his last remaining toady were now learning that lesson the hard way.

_"Wake up worm!"_**-SPLASH-**

_"You too, jackass!" _**-SPLASH-**

The Elder's curiosity had been piqued when Harry described Herb's new curse and she just had to see it for herself. Before waking her prisoners, she and her sisters had collected Drowned Girl and Drowned Rabbit water and made a seventy-thirty mix. They felt that any more Rabbit water and the 'girls' may not be able to use human speech. They wanted prisoners, not Pokemon.

Both newly christened bunny-girls shrank a good thirty centimeters shorter than they normally were. If they extended their new ears straight up, only then could they make up the lost height. Each girl now sported a full body fur coat under their robes. The robes were otherwise empty as the Amazons did not want their captives magic-ing themselves away like the Old Histories describe. While each girl was still groggy, the guards revised and tightened their bindings to ensure that there would be no escape. Priceless Amazon artifacts which Dumbledore could have told you were magic suppression bracelets were put on each girl's arm.

For the next half hour, Cologne allowed the guards to soften up the Death Eaters. Dove made sure to let Lucius know how much she appreciated their little spat last night. Let's ignore the fact that her skin hadn't been this soft in fifteen years.

Shampoo woke to the sweet sound of interrogation. Truly, the Amazons embraced schadenfreude. They knew as Conan the Barbarian once claimed that what was best in life was to crush your enemies, see them driven before you and to hear the lamentation of their women. Even in female dominated societies, it was only the women who lamented properly. With the Death Eater attack last night and this morning's prisoners, Christmas had come early this year. This is why she never looked elsewhere for love. This shit never happened unless you were close to Ranma.

It would be sunrise soon. Better get to work on those prisoners so that Cologne can digest their answers over breakfast. It's a shame that Shampoo couldn't let Ranma catch her getting out of his sleepy embrace from last night. He never felt her get into his cot in the first place, and that hard round bum-warmer felt so nice too.

Harry woke up to the distant sounds of a muted argument. Or something. Whatever, she needed breakfast.

Harry got out of her cot and proceeded to make her now habitual trip down to the river for fresh fish. She changed into a he and back twice before finally getting back to the hut with a good catch and his man-parts intact. By the time Harry was fed and refreshed, the noises outside had stopped. Ranma and Cologne were mumbling to each other in the local dialect over tea.

"Harry, do the names Joseph Murray or Lucius Malfoy mean anything to you?"

Harry's face lit up. "Malfoy? We got Malfoy last night? Brilliant! That bloody shite is a stain on Britain's honor. If that is a pure blood icon, then Magically Pure Britain can burn for all I care."

Cologne was glad to see they got someone who made young Harry react so openly.

Harry turned to Ranma. "Ranma, the Malfoy I was talking about earlier is this twat's son. Looks like you'll just have to meet both of them."

"My pleasure. A martial artist's duty is to defend the weak. A martial artist's _pleasure_ is to bust open twat face. The Amazons have a similar creed, do they not, Cologne?" Ranma looked over to the Elder. Harry followed suit.

Cologne nodded in affirmation. "Our warriors do protect the innocent from harm. Unfortunately, there are times in war where it can be hard to tell who is innocent and who is not in a pitched battle, but we do not slaughter needlessly. Those who prove themselves innocent or of value can join us or earn our protection in many ways."

"What of Malfoy and... Murray, was it?" Harry wondered what plans the amazons had for their captives.

Ranma kept the discussion on track, "The Amazons will deal with them later. First, you should know that the Death Eaters have been looking for your magic use here in China even if your own government hasn't been. Apparently there are some local wizard families that can tell when a foreign wizard is waving his wand about."

Cologne chose to interrupt. "This is an interesting development. We once thought that so few wizarding families were left in China that they could not keep tabs on us here in our valley. I shall put it to a vote at the village council that we should relieve these families of their unappreciated wives and daughters. Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer and all that."

"Anyway, our uninvited guests were supposed to take Harry away from what they thought were two Chinese witches. They seem to have been informed that you were in the company of a redhead and a blonde. They did not know you were the blonde. Even had they caught you, you would have had a chance to get away before they figured out who you were."

"Harry, I'm not sure it's safe for you in the valley any longer." Ranma had been having great fun since his introduction to the British boy, but safety was getting to be a concern. "We were attacked twice in one day. True, we stomped their asses, but now they know where we are and Herb may have some idea of what you can do. It's not a good idea to let your enemies get the initiative, Harry. Let's move first this time."

Harry seemed to think about it. Jusenkyo had been fun, all weirdness aside. Still, Ranma was right and Harry didn't want to lead his new friends into a trap the same way he had led his English friends into the Department of Mysteries.

Harry sighed before answering, "I see your point. I still need to figure out where to go and how to get there, though."

Ranma could see Harry getting depressed. Time for his favorite distraction technique. Hard exercise.

"Come on, Harry. Time for our run. Shall we ask Shampoo to lead this morning so that we both have a hot ass to stare at?"

"Shampoo be too-too happy give boy types eye candy!" Laying it on thick was always fun. She stretched a bit for her audience when the boys spun around to see her walking up to them. Shampoo ensured that most of her posing was more for Ranma than Harry; the jealousy angle could cut both ways and she didn't want to cause trouble between these two. After spending a few minutes collecting water for the run, they set off. Harry kept forgetting that he could provide for them with magic, but the extra weight just made for more exercise. Usagi floated along behind them. She didn't get any workout benefits, of course. She was just following two cute boys around. Shampoo wasn't bad looking either.

The Amazons did deal with 'them' later. Amazons deal with enemies like these Death Eaters the same way they deal with obstacles.

As the old Amazon saying goes, 'Obstacles are for killing.'

* * *

With lunch nearly over, Ranma and Harry had some time to give a short explanation of Harry's trip to Jusenkyo to the Amazon Elder. "The potion was supposed to do _what_?"

"Make it so that I could get pregnant. Not make me a girl, just a pregnant boy."

Cologne tried to hold her laughter in. She really tried.

"Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha _-hick-_ ha-ha-ha-ha _-hick-_ ha-ha!"

Harry pointed green eyes to the table and pouted.

"I'm sorry dear, but any Amazon could tell you that such concoctions are true myths. It does not matter that Jusenkyo can twist male and female so easily; the pools may help you become a pregnant girl, but not a pregnant boy. Such foolishness."

Harry was shocked. Elder Cologne was saying that the Headmaster's plan would have been an epic cock-up from the very beginning. "B-but how do you know for sure?"

"Oh, Sonny. The male-centric ruling class of Imperial China tried forever to get rid of women's one undeniably vital role in life so they could make a society comprised solely of men. If other men could bear children then some families would have disowned every woman to get rid of the 'lesser' beings." Cologne lost her humor at the explanation. "Believe me Mister Potter, they worked hard at their goal for millennia. Ironically, many promising first sons lost their fertility and many more lost their lives. All for the Greater Good of China of course."

Ranma piped up, "Isn't that what your Headmaster keeps preaching about? The 'Greater Good'?"

"That's it, exactly. Err, sorry to interrupt, but why are you serving lunch out of a pensieve?"

"A what, young man?" Cologne had heard that word in English before, but not used that way.

"A pensieve. Headmaster Dumbledore has one just like that and he keeps his memories in it, not his soup." Harry knew he'd recognized the etched patterns somewhere. The bowl appeared to be jade and the decorative work was clearly oriental but the etched runes were cut in the same pattern he'd seen on the pensive in Dumbledore's office.

"You mean to tell me that my soup bowl is enchanted in some way? If I had known that I wouldn't have eaten out of it so often."

Cologne took a closer look at the runes. She always knew they meant something but never had the needed knowledge to decode the runic message.

"If you would be willing to let me give it a good cleaning, I can use this to show you a bit more about my life. If for nothing else, then you can learn more about Death Eaters now that you have had the displeasure of meeting some of them."

Ranma, Usagi and the Amazons were all curious. They could both see magic and learn more of Harry's past at the same time. Harry pulled out his wand and proceeded to banish the soup and scourgify the pensive twice for effect. Usagi and the Amazons were all quite interested to see magic at work in common day to day tasks. Usagi wondered why she never tried to clean the dishes at home as Sailor Moon. Could she have done that too?

Then Harry put his wand up next to his temple and closed his eyes for a moment.

He spoke, "I'm going to do a test of sorts first. Let me put this memory in and see if I get everything right."

As they all watched, Harry pulled a long glowing strand of something out of his head and dropped it into the bowl. Everyone else was really impressed with this trick. 'Ha! They haven't seen anything yet!'

"Just let me check it out first... and don't be alarmed if I disappear for a minute or two."

They all watched Harry stoop over the glowing mists and promptly vanish. It's good that he warned everybody that this would happen or the Amazons probably would have immediately set up a search pattern.

Thirty seconds later, Harry popped back into position right where he was last time.

"Right. It works fine. Okay..." He checked to see that he had everyone's attention.

He had more people watching than when he went in. Oh. Cologne had retrieved the other elders in camp while he performed his test.

"This first memory is just to get you used to how pensieves work and to make sure that you can in fact use one. I hope that you don't have to be a wizard or witch just to get in. This memory is of me walking into Hogwarts Castle, that's my school, and going to eat lunch in the Great Hall. Once you all get used to Magical Scotland, I'll put a much darker and more violent memory in so you can see what my life is really like back home."

He thought for a few seconds before looking up again. "Ranma, please stoop over the pensieve and will yourself into the memory when your face touches the mists."

Ranma did so. His nose touched the mists. "Hey, nothing's hap-" And then he vanished.

"Brilliant!" Harry smiled. "If the rest of you would like to give it a go, I can show you what a school of Witchcraft and Wizardry is like." They all fell into the pensive one at a time. Finally, Tour Guide Harry followed them in.

Harry played tour guide, as promised. They saw the wizards and witches. They saw moving, talking portraits. Usagi was both pleased that she could go with Harry into the pensieve and annoyed that the castle ghosts couldn't see her. Ranma had to explain one more time that this was a memory and wouldn't be interactive.

Harry's Far East Delegation was introduced to the Great Hall and it's enchanted ceiling.

Ohhhhh. Ahhhhh.

He also 'introduced' his professors and friends. He explained the House system and provided commentary when Ron got points off and detention from Snape for defending himself with a shield charm after Draco Malfoy threw a hex his way. He then explained the blood purity issue and the whole dark/light magic breakdown. Everyone left the memory with little fuss.

"So, are you ready for a magic battle between the forces of Light and Darkness?" After the question was translated, he got a round of nods. They needed to know how serious these Death Eaters were. It was time to revisit the Department of Mysteries. Harry retrieved the first memory and braced himself for the next round. He had been trying vary hard to not think about it this past week and he had succeeded for the most part. Today somehow seemed so much easier than even the day before. It's almost like a great weight has been taken from his person but he couldn't tell what the weight was or where it sat.

No matter, on with the show.

Harry started with them passing through the Ministry Lobby and didn't stop until Minister Fudge saw Voldemort with his own eyes.

Everyone went in serious. Even Usagi who had been rather flighty this morning knew what it meant for light and dark to clash. Everyone in the party had been a veteran of deadly battle. They all returned from the memory rather grim faced and thoughtful. Cologne expressed her condolences to Harry for the loss of his godfather as she and the other elders took their leave to discuss what they had seen.

"I am sorry that you had to witness the horrors of war, Harry. You do not live the life the Joketsuzoku live. We prepare for that. You are not weak but you do not have the training of a warrior." Shampoo paused a moment, her 'cute' accent dropped completely due to the seriousness of what they just witnessed. "The Warriors of Joketsuzoku are not known for traveling the world over to battle evil, but, we have traveled in search of training and knowledge before. No doubt Great-Grandmother is asking her fellow elders for permission to sponsor a training journey."

"Please don't risk your lives on my account."

"It's not that Harry, it iss our people's history. We settled this valley after a great war between warriors who channeled their ki and warriors who relied on dark magic. We have killed men like this Voldemort before. We will do so again. We just thought that these monsters would always be discovered more near our own lands." Shampoo smiled at this. "If I were not willing to leave the valley and kill someone, I would never have truly met Ranma here."

Ranma snorted.

"Living my life surrounded by violent women has kept things interesting. I'll give you that."

Shampoo smiled at Ranma's barb before speaking again. "Hermione, Ginny and Luna. These girls could have been good Amazons with the proper training. I guarantee Great-Grandmother will want to meet them."

"I did promise to meet Malfoy Junior, didn't I?" Ranma settled his head on his forearms, almost napping on the table. "I don't break my promises."

Harry managed a weak grin and walked out of the hut. Usagi followed him. As Harry felt the pain of seeing his friends get cut up by the dark wizards and Bella, as he felt the pain of watching Sirius fall through the veil again, he also felt the overwhelming need to be a girl. He hit himself with a water charm. She immediately fell to the ground and began wailing.

Ranma looked up, panicking. He knew he was still no good at comforting a crying woman... forget comforting a crying boy-turned-girl.

_"I'll handle this."_ The purple haired Amazon called softly.

_"Thanks, Shamps."_ Ranma replied.

Shampoo walked outside to see the dead blonde whispering sweet encouragement into the living blonde's ear. Good. It didn't need to be in English to help. Shampoo sat down next to the wailing girl and pulled her into a tight embrace. Usagi continued whispering, always in the tone of a mother letting her little girl know that the bad monsters would go away and the good people would live happily ever after.

Usagi was torn. This boy was so much like her but there was one big difference. Sailor Moon had the support of her fellow Senshi almost right from the very beginning. Sailor Pluto stood before Usagi and told her to her face that all they had to do was stay the course... do this and they were guaranteed a perfect utopia and a happy ending. Sailor Moon never doubted her happy ending for a moment. Even dead, she was still confident that things would work themselves out. 'I mean really, this isn't the first time I died and came back somehow. Pluto will know what to do.'

Harry did not have a Sailor Pluto in his life. It looked like this Dubbledoor or whoever wasn't near good enough at encouragement to pull it off.

It was kind of a pity Sailor Moon was destined to marry Tuxedo Mask as Mamoru has been a real ass lately. She even caught him cheating on her a month before she got sucked into the spring. True Love is great and all that but how many times does she have to 'convince' Mamoru that they are destined to be together? It's not like her daughter Chibi-Moon and Sailor Pluto would conspire to have her chase after the wrong man, would they?

Well Chibi-Moon would do just about anything to get one over on Usagi... and on the other side of things Harry was kinda cute... those eyes... damn!

Harry woke up feeling both better and worse. She felt worse because she had collapsed in front of her new friends. Friends she couldn't hope to keep much longer as this was their home but it was not hers. The strong women of the Joketsuzoku must think her so weak to cry like a baby. She felt better, on the other hand, because heart felt lighter. A lot of the old tension and misery was gone. With this weight lifted off of her soul she promised to do better, to fight harder and keep her friends and loved ones close. She couldn't completely keep them out of danger but the faster Voldemort died the faster everyone would be safe again.

Harry looked over to the floating Usagi. The ghost quickly averted her eyes and blushed not unlike Moaning Myrtle in second year. 'I don't understand girls. I don't understand ghosts. I'm doubly cursed with this one.'

Harry found her bearings. No sign of the guide as he had really disappeared when all of the Amazons arrived. Probably a self preservation instinct. Ah, the elder.

"Elder Cologne," Harry started with a short bow to get her attention. "I humbly ask that you consider trading the pensieve to me for one of the enchanted items I have retrieved from the Pools of Sorrow."

"A trade, you say?" Cologne asked, showing less interest than she truly had. "Show me these treasures you have liberated from the pools. Perhaps there is something of note in your collection."

Cologne followed Harry back into the hut. The cursed blonde pulled out a bag and upended it over the table. Harry used her wand to push things clear of each other careful not to touch anything with bare skin. Cologne looked over the pile and mentally cataloged those items that she could identify. That's still only about half of the dozen odd items littering the table but any one of those pieces would find a place of honor in the Joketsuzoku armory vault. Luckily, her marketplace experience let no trace of excitement betray her interest.

"I see a water repellant bracelet. How ironic. Some of these items I am unsure of and cannot place a value on."

"I understand elder. Perhaps more than one item together might make up for the loss of a... soup bowl?"

Cologne cackled. Soup bowl indeed. That's what her own great-grandmother had used it for. That's all it ever has been until Harry Potter came to Jusenkyo and shook things up. There has not been a more powerful force for change in this valley since the last two times Ranma made his presence known.

Cologne pointed towards a jeweled chain. "That one is a Submission Choker. Not naturally dark, unless you don't happen to like submitting. Emperors and Governors in days gone by would have their brides-to-be wear the choker for the full first year of marriage, basically until she was too pregnant to run off. I will take that one from you for the safety of girls... and part-girls... everywhere." Cologne grabbed the choker – the very same piece Harry had in her pocket during the fight with Herb – and caused it to dissapear in her robes.

A submission choker. Oh, Hell. That was close.

"Suddenly I'm not very keen on that one, however pretty it is. Care to choose another?" Shampoo and Ranma walked in and silently watched the rest of the bargaining.

Cologne was already happy. The choker was just the kind of thing her sisters worked hard to destroy or to hide far from the eyes and hands of fools in power. This next one was icing on the cake. It's not like Cologne knew how to put memories in a pensieve without a wizard's help. She looked again. Oh yes. Ohhhhhhhhh yes.

"The dagger."

Harry almost forgot that there was a dagger in the pile. He tried hard to forget that he had Accio'd it straight at his own head. Harry looked at the blade in question. It had a bit of gold on it, sure, but very little compared to the other items. It alone among the items on the table looked... useful.

"The choker and the dagger in exchange for the pensive?" Harry asked.

"Yes." No hesitation.

"Deal. Would you be so kind as to tell me why you chose the dagger? I kind of liked that one."

"Of course." Cologne saw her new audience. Perfect setting for a story really. "Listen well Ranma. This dagger came out of the same pool you fell into. Fifteen hundred years ago, a battle was fought between our ancestors and those of the Musk tribe on the banks of the Pools of Sorrow. Many warriors of both sides either lost their footing and fell in, or were overpowered and thrown in. For weeks after the bloody stalemate, our people would put any unfamiliar animal they found into hot water at sword point. Should it turn into a woman, we welcomed our sister with open arms. Male? That's what the sword was for. It is said that the Musk did something similar, only any female unlucky enough to be caught in that manner was doomed to weeks of torture followed by a rather one sided marriage to one of those Musk beasts. One of the Joketsuzoku warriors present that day had just won the village tournament. It was the same annual tournament that you interrupted, Ranma, when you knocked Shampoo off our challenge log. This warrior maiden is known in our legends as Li. Li is known for her skill with knives. She carried no other weapons."

Ranma looked closely at the knife. Despite his natural preference for unarmed combat, he was really good with knives. But that true mostly _after_ his cold swim.

"Li fought as well as her sisters, but, it was her first battle and inexperience saw her tossed into a pool. Of all the warriors who fought and died that day, only Li was unfortunate enough to create a new pool."

Ranma started. Could his knife talents have been an 'instinct' from the Spring-of-Drowned-Girl? Spring-of-Drowned-Knife-Expert? Really, there was no way to prove or disprove his theory. He would have to speak of this to Cologne later.

Shampoo was almost drooling at the simple warrior's blade.

"It is said to be enchanted to be always sharp. A good thing for a knife expert. Our village will have a great feast when I return with the Blade of Li in my possession."

"I am happy to be able to return such a treasure to your people. Elder, will you explain the enchantments on items you can identify but will not take with you?" Harry hoped she did not sound desperate. If any of this other stuff were as useful as an ever-sharp dagger, then she'd use it every day.

"On the condition that, should our camp cook find the matching 'salad bowl' you would be willing to fill it with memories, both of your Magical education and some of non-magical England as well?"

'Tricksy little elf!' "Of course."

"Deal."

Dinner was fast approaching. Elders were popping in and out of the 'salad bowl' with increasing frequency and consulting each other.

Harry had a 'new' ring on. This one could detect potions and poisons in food. Just hold your hand over the plate or cup in question for a moment and the normally yellow jewel would become blood red if there was any 'funny stuff' under your hand. The ring wasn't too big or small nor was it overly gaudy or girly. People will notice it simply because she's never worn a ring before.

Harry is now the proud owner of a Reversal Jewel Pin, a bit of jewelry that could reverse your feelings in any relationship. Ranma scowled at that one. Shampoo too. Bad memories.

There was also a gold pair of hair sticks. Ranma called them kanzashi. He declined to say why he knew that and mumbled something about tea ceremonies. They were charmed to clean and style the wearer's hair in a few simple patterns based on how you held the sticks when they touched hair. They could be a great gift to the right girl someday.

The last magical item Cologne identified was a jeweled broach that could store emotions. Something about making social events more bearable or something.

The rest of Harry's things would just have to wait for proper identification. She put the identified items in a bag along with the water repellant bracelet. No one believed it would come through for a Jusenkyo victim. Just look where Harry found it.

Harry and Ranma spent the rest of the night discussing their options. They told Cologne at dinner that Harry would leave the Valley before noon. When that odd weight left her, she just knew that she'd be able to aparate on purpose now. She figured that so long as she still had others around her in the morning, that no splinching could be so bad as to be irreparable so long as she held on to the scepter.

What would Hermione have said about that bit of reckless risk taking – Harry wondered.

Usagi told Ranma that the crystal rod was supposed to be called the Kaleidomoon Scope, but that name was weak. Scepter of Prissiness sounded much more appropriate to Harry. Usagi pouted for all of thirty minutes before coming back to look at Harry. She's been doing that a lot.

"Hey Ranma."

"Yes?"

"Does Usagi know we're both leaving tomorrow?"

Ranma glanced in the spirit's direction before answering. "Yes."

"Does she have plans?"

"Can ghosts have plans? I'll ask."

Ranma had a short, quiet conversation with Usagi. The ghost looked over at Harry who still looked like Usagi. Ranma returned to Harry.

"She knows that you two can't understand each other, but she'd like to go with you if you're okay with it."

That surprised Harry. Ranma would be heading back to Tokyo to finally put some people in their places. The young ki master was done chasing dreams, especially when they weren't his dreams. Usagi was from Tokyo. If she confronted her family, maybe she could pass on?

Harry looked at Usagi. She stared back, unwilling to turn away. "Fine."

* * *

"Report."

"Yes My Lord." He really hated this part. He was new to the Death Eater ranks and had never been so close to his new Master since Initiation. These were his Master's private chambers. Lowly new recruits did not come down here unless a higher ranked Death Eater sent a subordinate to make a bad report in their stead. It was a painful duty.

Voldemort knew immediately if the news was good or bad based on who came in to report it. He did not complain as it was a very Slytherin tactic even if some were better at it than others. The man before him was not even a mission operative, just a recruit. 'Lucius, how could you fail me again? Don't you want your family to survive the purges?'

"M-m-my Lord, we have l-lost contact with Lord Malfoy and his escort. They are... hours overdue."

"I see. Hmmm... Andrews, is it?"

"Y-yes, My Lord." He looked into his Lord's eyes and saw burning hate.

"Do you know why it is that you were sent to report? Do you know why Drake did not come himself?"

Death ran cold fingers down Andrews's back. If he was going to die, at least he would get one last shot off at his superior. "Because Drake did not want you to curse him My Lord. He sent me to die in his stead."

The Dark Lord roared out in laughter. "True enough. Except, you have pleased me and his gambit has failed."

'Oh! Oh, thank the gods!' His Lord was pleased and would not kill him.

Voldemort had been looking into his eyes the whole time. "Correct, Andrews. I will not kill you. Instead, you will tell Drake to come here in person. Then you will take the men who had been working for Drake and use them to collect Narcissa Malfoy. Telling her I require her presence should be enough but if it's not..."

"If it's not, then we are to take her regardless, My Lord?"

"Correct. We shall have a.. party. And every good party has a proper hostess." 'Her husband was too slow, and now I have this odd charred tattoo on my forehead. If only I knew what the tattoo meant. Narcissa will have to survive her hostess duties. When I find out just what this mark means, I may need to be entertained again.'

"As you will it, My Lord."

"Yes. As I will it."

* * *

August 7th, 1996

Breakfast was far more quiet for Harry and Ranma than they were used to. While it was true that there was plenty of noise it wasn't the sounds of sparing followed by tales of who's childhood sucked the most. Today, both cursed boys quietly ate as the Amazons broke camp outside. This also meant it was time to get their shit out of the guide's hut too.

"So... Shampoo's going to Tokyo with you?" Harry had heard them talking, sort of.

"Uh... yeah. She said she would... well I asked first and all.." Was Ranma blushing? Go Shampoo!

"Good for you man. I really like that girl." Harry added encouragingly.

"Cool. Well, I would have anyway... but.. I'm glad you like her too." Maybe Ranma just needed a third person's perspective on Shampoo.

Harry decided to give him a push. "Really. You screw this up and I'm seriously going to go give her a dozen green eyed purple haired babies."

"You do and I'll kick your ass." At least he was smiling. Even if he was telling the truth.

"So... Christmas?" Harry really did want to see this guy again. It's almost like what having a brother would be like. Luna would understand. 'Mental note – upgrade Luna to full friend as soon as possible. She deserves it and so do I.'

"Right. I figure I'll need one month to knock the shit out of everyone who needs a good shit-knocking in Tokyo. Then two or three months martial training journey to get to Scotland and Hogwarts."

"Two or three months." Harry repeated.

"That's what I said." Ranma concurred.

"Alone, with Shampoo." Harry prodded.

Ranma stayed silent.

Harry grinned triumphantly. "I understand."

Harry gloated over Ranma's discomfort for a minute before getting back to business. "But I can't tell you how to get to Hogwarts. I can't even point to it on a map. How in hell are you going to find it?"

Ranma smiled. "Simple."

"Simple?" No fucking way.

"You use that rail line out of London, right?" Nod. "Step one: look for magic rail line in London. Step two: follow magic rail line North. Step three: go to Hogwarts via direct route."

Harry looked skeptical. "I still don't see how that is going to work."

"Cologne and I talked about this last night. Advanced ki users do feel the effects of your 'muggle-repeller' magics, but we can also learn to see the ambient magic that always follows active magic. Ki sensitive people can naturally see any ki inside the area of the spell whether or not they've learned to see the magic. To us, your wards look plain wrong and therefore stand out like a sore thumb. Jusenkyo Valley glows for me from a hundred kilometers away. Hogwarts will be the same."

"You win. Packed your gold?" Harry asked. Ranma got a good bit of gold out of the pool treasure deal.

"Hidden weapons technique. No border guard will ever find it."

Harry's brow rose. "That one sounds handy. Could I ever learn that one?"

"Got fifteen years you can devote to learning the martial arts?"

"Nope. Fresh out."

Harry was going 'girl'. She had 'her' spotless white tang on with black kung fu pants and shoes. Ranma told Harry to keep the outfit as a gift. In return, Harry had charmed Ranma's shoes to stretch for a proper fit, male or female. It was such a good idea. She did her own shoes the same way.

"White is more of your color, Princess."

Snort. Would you believe it? Usagi had insisted that Ranma explain more of who she was to Harry so that he would feel more comfortable around her. Spring-of-Drowned-Magical-Alien-Royalty was dead on. Who knew?

The kanzashi proved to be dead useful. They actually cut an hour off of handling those ultra-long blonde strands but the alternate identity would still have been worth it. Amazons would have given her some tips and helped with her hair anyway as exotic hair was considered a sign of individuality and fierceness to them. Besides, the Death Eaters were clearly looking for the 'boy' Harry and would continue to look for 'him' with or without blonde and redheaded whores hanging off either arm.

Harry stood still and relaxed. What had happened when she left Privet Drive? 'Merlin, was that only a week ago? No! Focus... I... I what? I needed to go, that's what. I needed to be somewhere else and just focused on that. McGonagall always spoke about Intent. But where shall I focus intently on?'

Harry looked around. Ranma looked bored. 'Wouldn't it be great to just pop behind-'

**-pop-**

"Aaaah!"

_-__**THWACK**__**-**_

"Shit, sorry Harry." Ranma apologized to the unconscious blonde witch on the ground.

Harry woke up half an hour later with a light headache and a knot on the side of her head.

"This shit is getting old!" There was a lot of laughter around her for that one. "Fine, Ranma I'll just try two more times to make sure I got it."

Harry sat up and noticed that she had no balance problems. Good. She stood. Where next?

"Okay, I'll aim for the stream where we went fishing as my next target. If I don't come back in one minute, or if I leave something behind, come get me."

"Leave something behind?" Ranma asked.

"You know. Clothes. Hair. Arse-cheeks. Those kind of things."

"You can leave those behind?" There was some more laughter.

"Actually, yes. That's why you're here. If I leave my bare arse on the ground here when I go to the fishing stream, your job will be to get that arse to me double quick so that I can whip out the Scepter of Prissiness and put it right again."

Usagi scowled, but they just wouldn't call it by its proper name.

**-pop-**

Harry was out of sight. Ten seconds later she came back.

**-pop-**

"One more time. I'll go to that clearing over there on the far side of the springs."

Harry concentrated and…

**-pop-**

Eight seconds later she came back.

**-pop-**

Three for three. It's time.

'I wonder how Usagi thinks she's going to catch up.' Harry knew that ghost thought she could.

With everything packed, she gave a slow bow to the elders. The Amazons bowed back. Shampoo jumped over and hugged Harry. Ranma and Harry shook hands in the manliest way possible.

Harry looked at Usagi. She didn't flinch. Harry then looked to the west. Europe was that way.

Yes, yes. It is a rough plan, but he didn't have the resources to fly muggle and people would be searching for him along standard magical routes, whatever they may be in these parts.

Okay, Ranma thought the plan sucked too, but Harry was a foolish Gryffindor to the core. Except for that bit that almost got into Sytherin.

Line of Sight aparition it is.

**-pop-**

Harry had left the valley.

**End Chapter**

Note: Wizards Dozen = Baker's Dozen = 13 Because, in numerology 13 is more important 12. Or something. I hear tell a Moron's Dozen is nine.

**Dirty Alternate Scene** – aka The Lesbian Three-way

Shampoo saw the young wizard-turned-witch's reaction to the bride's spring and thought it time to change topics.

"You two done talking about how much you'd like to 'shag' me, yes?" The 'boys' looked down and blushed.

Thank god Great-Grandmother approved. The three were now the sole occupants of the hut. Shampoo had waited for an opportunity like this since the first time she kissed a girl before she started weapons training. While she was willing to obey the Kiss of Marriage Law after losing to male Ranma so long ago, Shampoo was always deeply in love with his cursed girl side - the redhead. Shampoo was this close to winning now after so many months of being a good girl and keeping it down to smiles and winks... but look at what she could have tonight! Check out the new girl! So innocently sweet, a barely legal Euro-Japanese school girl! How hot is that?

Shampoo saw her opening. She gently hip checked Harry causing the Blonde to knock over a water jug and make Ranma go red.

Fortune favors the bold.

She leaned over Harry to get her chocolate eyes just inches from Ranma's blue and spoke in English with all raw need she could bring to the front. She also let her old accent show for effect. "Ranma help Shampoo scratch kitty itch, Shampoo teach schoolgirl Harry all need learn about how make girl too-too good screaming!"

Purple made her opening strike with a head grabbing french kiss to Red. Simultaneously her other hand snaked around Blondie's neck, dragging nails lightly across sensitive goose flesh and causing nerves to sizzle. As she deepened the kiss with Red, she noticed one hand from her kissing partner shakily slide up her arm, around her shoulder and under her chest. She also felt the feather soft touch of a hand on the back of her thigh mere centimeters way from her ass-cheek aligned tang bottom.

Shampoo never regretted wearing the traditional tribal tangs in Tokyo. She loved the effect they could have on her favorite redheaded Outsider. First sent after Ranma to kill her, Shampoo was always after the Little Death more. Ranma never realized that had the Redhead fallen, her life would have been spared if she were to 'submit' to her victor's will.

Shampoo's mouth tasted of want. She pulled away from her snogging partners and moved into checkmate.

"Shampoo promise. No boys in hut tonight, no broken Law and no weddings tomorrow. No getting Shampoo pregnant tonight. Getting Shampoo scream instead."

Ranma grabbed Shampoo roughly and restarted that kiss. Harry was already on board but didn't want to draw a crowd. She cast a silencing spell over the interior of the hut. She followed that with a notice-me-not and then turned the wand around and proceeded to trace circles on Shampoo's tight ass with it. A hand found the front of Shampoo's thigh placing Harry seconds away from discovery of Shampoo's knicker-less state this evening. Shampoo was going to prove Ranma was just as wet as she was in three.. two.. one..

Cue the funky music with a cool seventies groove to fuck to.

Cologne and her older subordinates scanned over the hut and grinned. The Wizard had some talent. 'She' had even greater potential. Still, they had all agreed that 'she' could not hide ki signatures for anything. Seeing the ki of three passion fueled young women with absolutely no other non-living material of note for meters in every direction was like raising a 'Hot Lesbian Hardcore Porn Starting Now' sign. There was some speculation and betting on how Ranma had lost her hymen. Money changed hands when it became clear that Ranma already knew how to please a woman. It was also clear by reading the ki signatures of Red and Blondie that Shampoo's partners were two of the most powerful young women alive in two different ancient fighting arts. Tonight would be a night Shampoo would win enormous bragging rights from and earn respect back in the Joketsuzoku village.

It was good to see the younger warriors enjoying each other as each generation did in countless days gone by. When one could die by blade or poison in mere seconds, one found happiness where she could.

**End Dirty ****Alternate Scene**

REV 7/2012


	7. No Pizza for Dead Usagi

**Chapter Seven: No Pizza for Dead Usagi**

August 9th, 1996

"I am such a bloody idiot!" Harry shouted into the distance.

'a bloody idiot!' 'a bloody idiot!' 'a bloody idiot!' The words echoed of the hills and mountains around him.

Harry had no bloody idea where he was. Maybe he'd have been better off developing his Slytherin side next to Malfoy if this is what Gryffindor bravery leads you too. It had been long enough since he'd seen a human other than Usagi that he decided going in his original form wasn't going to be a risk until he could actually see other people again.

His idea was simple... in theory. He had proven that he could apparate but he still did not trust a non-stop return trip to Britain just yet. Unfortunately, he hadn't been anywhere else even remotely close to where he was so there would be no other logical target to focus on. He would just use line-of-sight apparition to constantly head west until he hit a recognizable point in Europe. Then he would disguise himself in an English friendly area in one of the bigger muggle cities. The Scepter of Prissiness was still good for some magics that could keep him pretty comfortable without having to steal anything or risking using his own wand. In a couple of weeks it would be time for a shopping trip in Diagon Alley. He'd sneak in wearing what would by then be 'her' best Innocent Schoolgirl Disguise and make for Gringotts before any dark or light operatives could snatch her.

Brilliant... in theory. Except, there were these mountains, you see. Lots of them. They happen to be really big too. This had even been a boon at first because of how his travel technique worked. It was easy to look for a flat, safe looking spot on the next mountain over and just **-pop-** to it. Well, there was that one time he popped a little too high and had a bad landing. The Scepter of Prissiness came in handy that time. Usagi had at first gone mental that Harry had busted her leg. She seemed to totally forget that it didn't belong to Usagi anymore. She seemed to think that Harry was just borrowing the body and would someday give it back. The Scepter also proved to be good at accio and reparo. This was vital each of the three times Harry's landings caused him to lose his glasses. Of course, he couldn't always head due west or he'd quickly run out of things due west to look at. He wasn't about to try to apparate to the ridge of a mountain. He'd seen enough National Geographic specials sneaking out of his old cupboard to know how narrow and unstable they were. Harry was left searching for ledges and plateaus within a tolerable range of being far-but-not-too-far.

By dinner time on the 7th, a Wednesday, Harry had become tired and hungry and had made it half-way through Tibet. She was getting close to magical exhaustion, or so she thought. Harry still thought that this was a good idea for a while longer. The scenery was spartan yet beautiful. She had been through a few valleys that looked like no man had ever visited them before. The air was amazing. The water? Delicious and crystal clear. The starry night sky, being untouched by human illumination, gave her the most awe inspiring astronomy lesson's she'd ever had. Usagi was quiet the whole first day. For dinner, Harry had pulled out some Amazon prepared traveling food and stuffed herself.

The night of the 7th was one of sudden noises and icy temperature drops. Harry used the Scepter several times for warming charms and notice-me-nots, which she hoped worked on predators. If there were any out here. Were there? Shite. Where was Hermione when you needed her.

Morning on the 8th started late for Harry due to all the waking up at odd hours to strange noises. He couldn't ask Usagi what they were and expect any more than a shoulder shrug of incomprehension in return. Breakfast, light stretches and silly English lessons. Or was that Silly English lessons.

"Good afternoon. I am name Tsukino Usagi. Ara... eh.. My name Usagi Tsukino."

"Good morning, Miss Tsukino. My name is Harry Potter."

"I am not a pineapple."

"A what?"

"I have a bad case of diarrhea."

"I thought you were dead."

"So sorry. You have right answer. I am dead."

"Nice to have that cleared up then."

"Dead not good. No pizza for dead Usagi."

As they started moving again, her ramblings phased in and out of English and soon focused on Japanese. Lunch had briefly restarted their English lessons until they petered out again an hour later. She must have gone through her own life story twice that afternoon with him not understanding a word of it. By sundown she had stopped again thankfully, as Harry had really begun to regret Usagi's new need for noise. Mentally tired, physically spent and magically drained, she collapsed the second her crude safety and heat charms were set. Food could come later.

The ground covered on the 8th of August may have been even more pristine and beautiful than what they saw yesterday but actually apparating through all of it was hard work. Luckily, she only had one accident to show for it. While it was not as painful as yesterday, it was more embarrassing. She misjudged her target and appeared directly over a cold stream.

One day Usagi would get to tell someone all about it. Her only witness was dead and yet she would still suffer for this, she just knew it.

It was the morning of the 9th now and Harry had just declared himself to be a bloody idiot. He was still tired. He was still at a magical low point. He was also standing in the foothills of some of the biggest mountains he's never seen before. Harry had run out of gas in front of what Victorians had called the Roof of the World because mountains simply didn't get any higher. Anywhere.

Harry just sat and stared at the side of a snow capped mountain chain. Good thing the Scepter of Prissiness could do a half decent warming charm even without draining him. Harry really didn't want to use his wand if Death Eaters or the Order were able to track it and he thought maybe they could.

Usagi materialized next to Harry. "Hi, Usagi."

"Hi, Harry!" Usagi was still with him. He didn't know why but she was. That did warm his heart. Maybe he could still do this.

Who the hell was that hot woman with arse length green hair and that hot cheerleader outfit and why was Usagi having mental fit?

What green haired hot woman? The one who blinked into existence directly in front of Harry and Usagi as if by magic. She wore a very revealing outfit which looked like a white one-piece swimsuit with black ribbons and bows, a short black skirt, knee length black boots and elbow length white gloves. She was also carrying a long staff with odd, almost key-like details. Oh, and she was hotness incarnate too.

Usagi didn't stop and drool like a horny teenager like Harry did, but she did react strongly just the same. The young ghost zipped back and forth between Harry and the exotic sexpot gabbering like an over excited teen. If those facts weren't odd enough when taken together, Hotness somehow failed to notice Usagi screetching in her ear from three inches away.

'I thought that magicals could see ghosts.' Harry thought to himself.

Hotness spoke. "Greetings Mister Potter. I am Sailor Pluto and I'd like to extend to you an offer to spend some time in Japan."

Harry glanced over to Usagi who had stopped screetching and looked thoughtfully at the newcomer. Suddenly, Usagi smiled. It was a Weasley Twin Smile. She held one finger pointed up in front of her mouth and mimed 'shhhhhhh' at Harry. Fine, Harry could play this game at least for a little while.

"Does your offer include at least one week of assassination free relaxation?" Harry asked. "Will there be pretty girls in outfits similar to yours who were once Magical Amazon Women on the Moon?"

Hotness a.k.a. Pluto didn't flinch at Harry's querry. "Yes, and yes. I'll promise at least seven days of rest and relaxation if you want it."

Harry drew the Kaleidomoon Scope from her belt. "Will you help me learn how to master the Scepter of Prissiness?"

Pluto's eyebrow ticked a bit, but she held it together. "Of course."

Usagi was both laughing her ass off and livid that Harry would call her weapon the 'Scepter of Prissiness' in front of other Scouts. He was SO going to get it. She just had to figure out how.

"Lead the way." He stepped towards Hotness. That was a much better name than Pluto. Pluto was cold and hard. Look at those eyes. Red! Maroon, maybe? Hotness was like Shampoo only better. Hotness might be available. 'I wonder if all of these Senshi are hot. Am I that hot when I go blonde? Usagi makes a good looking ghost… if you're into that kind of thing.'

"Take my hand." He never knew that Japan had super-veela. Is that what 'senshi' translates to? Did it come from being aliens?

"As you wish." A moment later, Usagi the ghost is the only sentient at the top of the hill. Three more seconds pass, and the hill is once again deserted.

* * *

Sailor Pluto and Harry arrived in a room which appeared to be the entry foyer of a clean and well appointed house somewhere. That somewhere was likely to be Japan if the décor, background music and the visible magazines were anything to go by. A wall mounted clock showed the time to be mid-morning. She looked down at his feet with a raised eyebrow. He looked down to find out why.

Harry's very dirty shoes were defiling Pluto's very clean floors.

"Terribly sorry." Harry squeaked, "I've been outside a bit more than usual these past few days. I'll just take them off, then."

Hotness was right to be annoyed. More to the point, Harry was dirty all over and taking off his trainers wouldn't be enough to deal with all the dirt and grime of walking through the wilderness without frequent showers and clean clothes. He had stopped using scourgify on himself halfway through yesterday and had given up on cleaning himself properly out in the middle of East Nowhere. Thank god for those kanzashi taking care of her hair before Harry went boy again.

He took off his shoes and donned a convenient pair of slippers which seemed to be waiting for him.

"Before we get to proper introductions, perhaps you would like a bath?" Pluto offered.

A bath actually sounded pretty good right about now. Harry nodded, a bit too distracted with his own body odor to reply properly. Then he remembered their method of transport here. Specifically, that method was nothing like apparition or portkeys as far as he knew. It was smooth, easy and nearly instantaneous. Weird. If this woman is a Sailor Scout like Moon and she has magical skills like teleportation, then why can't she see Usagi who is even now making a long string of silly faces at a woman she obviously knows very well?

Maybe there are different kinds of magic? Different kinds of magical people? Harry considered his life and where it has led him so far. 'If I live through all this shit, I'll write a book about it.'

Hotness led him to a small but comfortable bathroom with western fixtures. When he looked back to ask for a towel, Harry saw that the woman had somehow already changed into a muggle outfit. Oh, Merlin. Make that a short, tight, high class business suit and skirt combo. Hotness just went from a ten point five to an eleven. That's on the scale where Fleur Delacour and Shampoo are both tens.

When he asked for and received a spare outfit, he didn't even notice that there was a bra and knickers set resting on top of the 'MiniMoni' t-shirt and low cut jeans until Hotness had already stepped out of the bathroom and left Harry to his own devices. Looking back, she did seem really amused. Or, she was doing legilimency non-stop on him. Either way, her deep red eyes were sparkling like jewels and Harry wanted to see more of that.

At least he got to take a long hot shower and relax a while thinking of his new favorite person. Hotness.

"Hi, Harry!" Usagi's head hovered a few centimeters from his own. 'I should have guessed. First good chance to relax and get the dirt out of those hard to reach places. At least he hadn't tried to relieve the pressure that Hotness caused before... hey, what's she looking at?'

Usagi was not looking at his face. No, Usagi was visually inspecting Harry's wand. Not the phoenix feather cored one. The Hotness inspired rigid flesh wand. She was displaying that odd blue blush again. Harry quickly grabbed a rag to cover himself. Disappointed that the show was over, Usagi felt a small well of guilt from perving on him before she reminded herself just how often Harry gets to see her own nude form _and_ touch it. Usagi stuck her tongue out at Harry in a classic strawberry before passing through the bathroom wall.

* * *

While Harry finally got to his hard earned rubbi- errr, scrubbing off, Usagi had some places to go. She wanted to see her friends. She also wanted to see if her friends could see her. Usagi had gotten used to a wizard and the group of ki-sensitive martial artists who could easily see and hear her. If her closest friends and loved ones could not see her… well that would just tear her apart.

Usagi tried very hard not to shed spectral tears as she stared into the eyes of Ami Mizuno from the seat in front of her.

Another student in the class had at one point attempted to sit in Usagi's seat. Usagi wasn't paying attention and hadn't moved which meant the girl sat in a ghost. The living girl left soon enough after being unable to stand the intense cold-spot which had come into being with Usagi's sad state.

Not that Usagi noticed. She was in shock. Ami was not paying attention in class. Ami, the smartest, most studious girl Usagi ever met, was ignoring her teacher. She had failed to raise her hand for a question three times in a row. Had the end of the world arrived early?

Usagi placed her hand on Ami's. The cold spot moved. After two more questions went unanswered by the very brightest mind Usagi had ever known, she couldn't take it anymore. Usagi left. The cold-spot disappeared.

Bells throughout Tokyo rang signaling the end of another school day. Students began to leave T&A Girl's School for home in that rush of feet and noise that is common to every school full of teens, whether they be English or Japanese or of any other nation. One girl, a fairly popular one, stayed in her seat longer that the others. True, many of them had tried to comfort Rei Hino after hearing that one of her closest friends outside of school was missing and presumed dead, but they had stopped trying in the past few months. None of the other girls in this close knit Catholic School ever knew much about Miss Tsukino or what she meant to Rei. For better or for worse, it was destined to remain that way.

Rei dropped her forehead down onto her notebook and muttered aloud, _"It's been 'a few days', Pluto. Where is my Pri__n__cess?" _

Suddenly not so keen on staying in such a cold room, she left for home.

Back at Rei's desk, Usagi looked like she had regained some of her lost happiness. True, both of her closest, longest friends missed her terribly. But... Usagi was beginning to see silver lining to her cloud. It felt so wonderful to just sit there for the last ten minutes of class and watch as Rei drew sketch after sketch of the symbol of Mars interlocked with a crescent moon.

'I love you too, Rei. I love each and every one of you, of course.. but... and living or dead, I always will.'

Usagi left Rei's classroom and followed her friend into the world at large.

Rei crossed her arms over her chest, only, the cold didn't leave her. Not even when she passed through direct sunlight. If only the hairs on the back of her neck would sit back down then this wouldn't be the most awkward trip back to the Hikawa Shrine in months.

It felt as if she were being followed but when she looked back, there was nothing.

She started walking faster.

* * *

Harry looked at his reflection. Stared at it, really. No, he hadn't fallen to narcissism. After going a full week with no one staring at his scar, he found himself unable to look away from it. It was fading. It had never done that before. He knew it had stopped hurting after the fight with the Musk Prince, but he hadn't realized just how much had changed since then. He hadn't had any nightmares for a while either.

"Usagi, Luv. What did you do to me?" Harry muttered to himself.

He stared for another ten minutes before absentmindedly reaching for the cold water tap. She stared again. Looking into the reflection of a Chinese spring had given her some idea of what Usagi Tsukino looked like, but this was her first good look at the full package.

In Harry's humble opinion, she was hot!

Brilliant! Senshi may actually translate to 'hot alien' or 'Japanese super-veela' after all. She'd have to meet more of them and find out.

* * *

"Hello again, Harry." Hotness was waiting for her downstairs. "Now that you've had time to freshen up, it's time to... get to know each other better."

Oh, yes. Harry wanted that. You could say she had gotten a head start on that once Usagi had fled 'his' shower. The green haired, red eyed vision had been firmly fixed in Harry's vivid imagination long enough to... relax... like he hadn't done in quite some time. Odd thing was, right at the end when he was getting the most... relaxed... ghost Usagi had popped into his vision just like she had popped into his shower and completely replaced Hotness at that critical moment. He had never felt so dirty in his life than when he realized that he had just wanked to the image of a dead girl.

One that 'she' now looked like while sitting in front of Sailor Pluto's civilian identity. 'Please, please, please don't be an expert legillimens, Hotness.'

Setsuna may have been misinterpreting Harry's blush, but had circumstances been only slightly different, she would have been spot on. Her eye sparkle increased. Harry's blush deepened and she looked down to the tea service between the girl and woman. Setsuna briefly took note of the kanzashi which collected half of Harry's blonde hair into a bun while leaving the rest to flow into a single braided tail. Interesting.

Pluto bowed slightly before Harry. "I'd like to start by apologizing to you, Mister Potter, for taking so long to get to you."

Harry absently scratched at her neck and chuckled a bit. "Well, when one gets as absolutely lost as I got trying to get back to Europe without help, I can see why it would be hard to catch up to me."

Setsuna smiled. Harry did manage to pop up in one of the least accessible places on the Eurasian continent. Not that Kashmir or Siberia were hard for _her_ to get to, but there were some places that gave the Senshi trouble.

"It's not where I found you Harry, but where you were before that which kept us from meeting earlier. You may have noticed that Jusenkyo can have the most unusual effects on people."

Harry chuckled lightly and nodded at that.

"But where are my manners?" Pluto held out her hand in greeting, "My name is Setsuna Meioh, though as I have said, I am the Senshi of Pluto."

Harry took her hand and shook it politely. "Pleased to meet you Miss Meioh. I am Harry Potter, as you seem to know already. I have been given a title as well, but I don't care for it much and I ask that you call me Harry."

Harry also bowed back to Setsuna, a bit of her conditioning in the cursed valley kicking in. She felt like she should have been a lot better better at it after a week in China, but Ranma and the Joketsuzoku were oddly lax in that seeming universally oriental greeting. Harry wondered if it was the warrior way, not allowing your eyes to drop from a potential enemy and all that. Or it could just be that there are different peoples involved what with how big the country is and all. Harry had decided early on that not all Chinese or Japanese looked alike as the stereotypes say. He'd easily be able to pick Ranma or Shampoo out of a crowd easily enough at least. And Hotness too.

"Fair enough Harry; and please call me Setsuna when I dress liked this. If you should see me again dressed as I was when we met, then I ask you to call me Sailor Pluto. We can't be giving away the secret to just anyone, can we?" Her eyes once again pierced Harry's core, and she nodded in response.

"This," Setsuna stated, waving her free hand around and behind her, "is my home. I invite you to stay as my guest for as long as you want."

Harry smiled. "Thanks again, for that. Beautiful as it was, the land I passed through was a very lonely place."

"I am happy that you did get something out of the experience then." Setsuna replied. "Jusenkyo has done something that is extremely rare. It caught me unawares."

Harry had no trouble believing that even with knowing the woman for only a few minutes. Whatever Dumbledore had in those eyes of his, she had more. Far, far more.

"I'm sure that the Pools of Sorrow have a long history of catching people unawares." Harry said. "Be thankful that their affect on you was from a great distance and not close up."

Pluto smirked at that one before becoming serious. "Indeed. Sadly, Jusenkyo _has_ claimed someone close to me. Tell me, Harry, have you heard the name Usagi Tsukino before?"

She had, of course. Had Usagi been following Harry rather than her close friends around, Harry would likey have looked right at her. Lucky. No such tip off happened. Harry did, however, react to the name. She didn't think she could cover it up, either. Still, Usagi was flitting about undetected at the moment, so Harry chose to sacrifice some of the truth to hide the rest of it.

"Yes I have. The guide pointed out that a girl's body had been pulled out of the spring I fell in some months before my own little swim. She had a student ID on her. Miss Tsukino was buried near the springs. I'd offer to take you to visit her grave, but I've learned not to tempt fate like that. You could come back as 'changed' as I was."

Harry's story was checking out, but you don't fool the Guardian of Time with school level misdirection. Still, Harry could have 'her' secrets. Unlike the Hogwarts Headmaster, Sailor Pluto knew that her 'girls' and Harry were alike in that a soft touch would be far more effective than a strong arm. She was, however a true disciple in withholding information. Loose lips sank ships. Really, really big ships. Lots of them.

Pluto detected a hint of entertainment in the story. She's most likely having a bit of fun, then. If it were more serious... but it wasn't.

"I will take your word for it." Hotness sipped her tea. This was going along brilliantly.

"She had friends, of course. Friends who are desperate to see Usagi again. These girls need their Princess, even if only for a little while." Let the boy-turned-girl know it's important, but let's not scare her off. "They will realize of course that you are not really Miss Tsukino, but you could give them a little something of her that has been missing in their lives." She recalled Harry's offhand comment about 'Magical Amazon Women'. "But I suspect you already know something about them?"

How did sh... oh. The loose lips were her own, weren't they? Well, she could still try to hold back for Usagi's sake. If not for the dead girl, Harry would sing like a canary for Hotness. A canary and not a Norwegian Blue, however remarkable the plumage.

"You win. I of course have here my Scepter of Prissiness," She pauses a moment to show off the item in question, "Which is quite the fashion accessory. It's also helped make me a bit of a celebrity back in the valley."

Pluto's eyes sparkled. "Do tell."

"Of course. You see... you do know some of my background, right?" Harry asked.

"I know about your school and your wizardry. I may not read the daily papers of magical Europe, but I have a few resources to pull from. I know about your other title. Titles, really. I must say, you don't strike me as a future Dark Lord." Oh, Hotness. You do care.

Harry continued. "When I came out of the Spring-of-Drowned-I'm-Not-Sure-Who-She-Was, I was lucky enough to pull the Scepter out of the mud with me. I didn't know what is was for sure, but it felt powerful in the same way my phoenix feather wand feels."

Harry pulled out her pride and joy and showed it to Hotness. She really hoped she approved of it. She wanted her to touch it. 'Put those pervy thoughts away, Me! Hotness isn't done talking and neither am I.'

Setsuna briefly studied the wand in Harry's hand before smiling just a little bit more and giving the slightest of nods.

"Well, I started to cast spells with it just to see how it would react to me. Some worked and some didn't, but then a few of them were just magnificent. This sparkly crystal stick may be the most girly thing I have ever laid hands upon, but it's wicked powerful when you do the right things with it."

Harry noticed her cup had gone dry. Hotness kindly refilled it for him. Harry briefly glanced at her new ring as it pressed against the refreshed cup. Still that clear amber-yellow. Silly Harry, Hotness would never do that. She's nothing like Dumbledore.

Dumbledore had nothing on Pluto. She knew Harry was editing out a few things from her epic tale, but that was fine. 'Just keep talking, Mister Potter. That's all I ask.' The more he says, the smaller her gaps in knowledge from those infernal Pools.

Jusenkyo was like the magical version of a lighting storm. It was strong, wild, dangerous and capable providing interference to sensitive instruments. Instruments like the Time Gates. Pluto couldn't observe the Pools directly and knew by reputation to stay away physically. Just look at Usagi. There were other phenomenon that acted the same way. They seemed to Pluto to be little chaos magnets and magical generators of all shapes and sizes. A Jusenkyo touched martial artist by the name of Ranma Saotome was one such chaos magnet. Luckily, it had been a while since Pluto felt the need to interfere directly in his life. The volleyball tournament _was_ fun though.

Pluto grinned. Harry blushed and looked away again.

Pluto would have to see about setting up another round at Zach Island. Her time as 'Tina' had been a great vacation from her duties as the Guardian of the Time Gates.

This was really good tea.

* * *

Usagi had finally left the Crown Video Arcade. If she were still alive, she'd be hyperventilating right now. She was trying really hard to do it anyway.

At first, Usagi just floated through the center of the game room floor, looking for familiar faces. A couple of the older games seemed to flicker as she passed and more than one teen patron swore bloody murder when their super-attack-combos and almost-high-scores were lost to resetting hardware. That should have brought out the floor manager.

Where was Motoki? Usagi went for the back room.

She found Motoki, alright. She also found her best non-Senshi friend of several years, Naru. Apparently, Naru had run out of tokens. Motoki, being the nice guy that he was, had told Naru where the extra tokens were stocked and she was currently sucking them out through his... nevermind. _Awkward. _Maybe Usagi should leave the two alone to finish their transaction. On the other hand, it sounded like Motoki was getting ready to... hand over those tokens.

'Uh, Naru. You might want to back up a.. oh. Too late.'

Usagi felt the need to hand Naru a soda. And a moistened towelette.

'You need to get your glasses too, Naru. Ew. Ewwwwww.' Apparently Naru was hungry.

The electromagnetic hotspot left the Crown Video Arcade and tried really hard to hyperventilate. Failure. She tried to go the other rout. Wow! They'll never guess how long Usagi can hold her breath now! This is so cool!

* * *

"...and so Kiima formally gave me the necklace. It's a symbol of her people's loyalty to the House of the Moon and therefore their loyalty to me. In conclusion, I didn't fall into the Spring-of-Drowned-I'm-Not-Sure-Who-She-Was. I fell into the Spring-Of-Drowned-Magical-Alien-Royalty a.k.a. Spring-Of-Drowned-Sailor-Moon. Yay me." Harry hated pulling out his inner Slytherin on Hotness, but he thought it was working.

Pluto almost laughed. Harry was definitely hiding something, but just look at what she was willing to let go of instead. And most of it was true! Oh, well. She can't possibly keep it up for long, whatever it is. 'If I'm lucky, Harry will drop this bomb in front of the assembled Senshi and I can have yet another happy memory to add to those lonely stretches that take up most of my Time.' This dropping into the Time Stream like she's doing now is half business and half pleasure. How many other people would consider stomping out threats to all life everywhere a way to kill the boredom of everyday existence?

…

Just as Shampoo stepped onto the ship she and Ranma were boarding, her traveling companion suddenly developed a rather violent sneezing fit. As this happened on a somewhat regular basis, they continued on. Great-grandmother was quite firm in stating that these episodes were in no way symptomatic of any physical health issues.

…

"The short answer, Harry, is that you already know some of the back history of our group. Tonight you'll be meeting Usagi's friends who are the other Senshi. A few of them actually live here, so you'll be seeing Saturn, Neptune and Uranus before the others." The tea was almost empty. As it was mid afternoon, the girls were getting out of their schools. Haruka, Michiru and Hotaru had just picked up Chibi-Usa and they would be here in short order.

"And you've told them about me?" Harry asked nervously.

"I told them that a British wizard, that's you, released their Princess from a magical spring."

Harry glared at Hotness.

"Don't look at me like that. It's true." Bad puppy. Technically, she was still telling the truth. Bad Puppy was sorry for making Hotness use her Mommy Voice.

"Even for Magical Girls like the Senshi, the magic of Jusenkyo has to be seen to be believed. I did tell them that you, as a girl, won't act like Usagi or remember any of her life. They also know that you don't speak Japanese. This will cut down on the questions because only three of them are fluent or near fluent in English. I expect Neptune, who will be here in a few minutes, to understand about half of what you say and she'll be able to get her point across. Now, if you don't mind, I have a meeting to set up."

Setsuna got up and walked into another room. 'But what to I tell the others then? Hotness? Where did she run off to?'

Harry walked into the same room Hotness had entered expecting to find her with a phone in her hands. The room was empty. Hotness had run out on her! Maybe not, there was a noise from two rooms over. Harry turned, passed through one room and walked up to the next doorway to squeeze more information out of Hotness.

"Setsuna. Setsuna?" Harry stopped. Oh bloody hell. Four girls were staring at her like the dead had just come back to life. The smallest one - the pink haired, red eyed one – got that look on her face that eight or nine year olds get when they are about to unleash epic tears. Then she practically teleported over to Harry, grabbed the aquatransexual around the waist and began wailing. Harry didn't know what to do, so she froze and did nothing.

Wrong answer.

Haruka knew in the back of her mind that they would be seeing their Princess again soon, maybe even tonight. She expected Pluto to warn them first. When their eyes met, the dead girl froze. No smile. No joke. No happy tears or greetings to her daughter. And when Chibi-usa grabbed on to her future Mother, the bitch just stood there, frozen. The small scar on her forehead, Haruka could have argued away as it had been a while, but what was up with changing her defining hair style? Wait. Since when did Usagi need glasses? That couldn't really be Usagi. It had to be someone else. No!

Harry had a split second to panic as a butch dirty blonde yelled out some kind of challenge and jumped at her with a swinging fist. The pink haired munchkin had a death grip on her and Harry couldn't move. The last second before Haruka's knuckles impacted with Harry's temple was when she finally got a word out.

"Wait!" _-CRACK-_

Haruka came out of her red haze in time to see an unconscious Princess fall to the floor like a sack of potatoes. 'Princess' Harry took Chibi-usa to the floor with her as Chibi was unlikely to let go of her Momma any time soon. Haruka then saw the Kaleidomoon Scope sitting next to a tea service not far from the bleeding blonde's head. A fake princess wouldn't have that magical weapon with her, would she? If Usagi weren't transformed into Sailor Moon, then why did she even have it just sitting around, anyway?

Haruka watched as Michiru saw to sleeping beauty and Hotaru began to comfort the distraught Chibi-usa. 'Pluto is going to love me for this.' Even in her mind, the sarcasm was pretty thick.

**End Chapter**

REV 07/2012


	8. Magical Alien Debutant Drama

**Chapter Eight: Magical Alien Debutant Drama**

Still August 9th, 1996

Harry was dreaming. In this dream, she (and it was she this time) was forced by a bastard of a father figure to pilot a giant robot to defend Japan from beings referred to as 'angels'. Angels as in horrific beasts that would make Godzilla look like a stuffed animal as they went about attempting to extinguish all life on Earth. Weird. Ever since her fight at the Pools of Sorrow, Harry's dreams have become truly exotic. There was that one two nights ago where he (and it was he this time) was the only person who knew that a very short green skinned purple eyed alien was plotting to destroy and/or enslave the Earth. Good thing he was so bad at it. But enough about meaningless dreams. It was time to wake up.

Even before Harry opened her eyes she could tell that she was not alone in bed. There was a small warm body pressed up against her right side. It was very soft and had a firm grip on Harry's right arm. There was another warm body pressed up against her left side. It was slightly bigger than the first one but still not Harry's female form. Her left arm was pinned by this person and Harry's hand appeared to be resting on this (girl's?) knee. Now that memories of how she came to be unconscious to begin with, Harry expected the right arm brace to be a pink haired girl who looked too young for Hogwarts. Her left arm should be held down by the girl with dark purple hair. Even ignoring stereotypes, pink and purple were not normal hair colors. Harry remembered the dirty blonde and her teal/ blue-green haired friend too. Harry would have thought these girls had dye jobs if she didn't know that the Senshi she's meeting up with were at least part alien. What did that mean for the Chinese Amazons? Did they have magical alien blood in them too?

The little one moved against Harry's side. Sigh. There was no putting it off any longer. Harry opened her eyes.

Straight ahead were the tomboy and her girlfriend. The blonde's hand being between the teal haired girl's thighs was a dead giveaway. They both saw her come to but were silent for the moment. Harry looked down and right. Little blood-shot red eyes were staring right back at her under an adorable pink twin ponytail hairstyle. Considering the pink comet's introduction, Harry figured she'd better deal with this girl before turning to the other one.

"I'm sorry Sweetheart. Setsuna played a dirty trick on all of us, didn't she?"

As she spoke, she pulled her left arm free from Miss Purple and gently placed her palm on Miss Pink's cheek. Miss Pink suddenly scrambled into Hary's lap. Shaking arms snaked around Harry's back in a desperate hug while Miss Pink buried her face in Harry's soft, fluffy chest. That was different. Harry briefly fought off the feeling that a boy should not have a soft, fluffy chest and started to rub circles into Miss Pink's back. The others hadn't said anything yet. The blonde and her girlfriend were beginning to smile. Thank Merlin, Harry did not need another knuckle sandwich. Now that Miss Pink seemed to be recovering, Harry looked to her left. That one was smiling at her with light purple eyes and she did look like a second or third year Hogwarts student age wise.

"Excuse, please. You are not Usagi?" The teal haired girlfriend made the inquiry.

Okay. Harry could do this. Gryffindors go bravely forward, don't they?

"I am very sorry for scaring you. My name is Harry Potter. I am from England. Setsuna Meioh brought me here today. Are.. are you Usagi's friends?" Harry tried to keep things simple just in case the other girl's mild accent was a sign of how well she understood English.

She spoke to the others in Japanese. Looks like Harry did get a translator with this group. Good. The blonde stood up and gave Harry a rather formal bow while saying something in a very subdued tone.

Her girlfriend translated. "Tenoh Haruka apologize for hitting you. My name is Kaioh Michiru. Girl with pink hair is Chibi-usa. Last girl is Tomoe Hotaru. We love Usagi-chan and miss her very much."

Usagi was really missing out. Harry wondered where the ghost had gotten off too.

* * *

Usagi was following Rei from T&A Girls' School to her home at the Hikawa Shrine. Well, following from in front of her, that is. She was looking at Rei from about two meters ahead while gliding backwards and matching Rei's pace. Being a ghost meant that Usagi never had to worry about tripping or being run over by autos. She did avoid passing through other living beings for the most part but that was simply out of habit. This spectral stalking trick allowed Usagi to catch Sailor Pluto materialize behind Rei and instantly revert to one of her civilian business dresses. Wow, Usagi never really caught Pluto doing that before. Seeing it happen was far more impressive than being caught unawares.

Setsuna spoke up. _ "Rei._"

_"Gwah!"_

Rei's response was very logical. She jumped like a nerve had been struck. It was the same response Usagi usually gave when she was in the same situation in the past.

_"I am sorry I surprised you so, Miss Hino."_ 'No, you are most certainly not sorry.' Usagi wished she had access to some ghost friendly popcorn. _"There will be a Senshi meeting tonight. I trust you can host the function?"_

_"Y-yes. I would be __honored. Will we see Usagi again?"_ Usagi could see the hope in Rei's face.

_"Your Princess will be reintroduced to the Senshi tonight. Please remember that she is not quite the same as last time. This is very important. You and the other girls will have to treat her like an honored guest first and a close friend second."_

_"I remember what you said before. I will not let my Princess down." _Rei looked out over the city. It was a mix of ancient and modern. The very oldest and newest Japan had to offer, both less than a block away. _"You said that she does not speak Japanese, correct?"_

_"Yes. I can translate. So can Minako, Ami and to a lesser extent Michiru. Plan on the young wizard ma__k__ing an appearance too."_

The two magical girls looked each other in the eye.

Rei knew what was coming next._ "Minako's going to cause trouble, isn't she? Is he cute enough to snare the others too?"_

Yes, he was. Usagi immediately nodded along with Setsuna, forgetting for a second that neither Mars nor Pluto could see her. Setsuna took her leave and disappeared. Other girls had to be clued in to the meeting. Someone had to bake cookies.

Rei started walking again. As she passed within a few inches of an invisible Usagi, she paused to rub her neck and look around. She began walking again as not to attract too much attention in public.

Before dying, Usagi would have paid serious money to screw with Rei like this. The shrine miko clearly felt something whenever Usagi came close. She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and looked around anytime the ghost was within arm's reach. Usagi decided to take it to the next level. She carefully maneuvered behind her target and began a ghostly sprint right for Rei. Rei had just brought her hand up to the short hairs on her neck again when Usagi's bombing run came to an end and Usagi went right through Rei.

Oh. My. God.

The spectral princess actually_ felt _that. She had never felt anything like it before but it was the first time she felt anything at all since waking up to a magical summons and saving the day for Harry. Behind her, Rei got back off of her shaky knees and began a sprint to the gates of the Hikawa Shrine's boundary wall.

High on the thought of feeling anything at all, Usagi started to chase down her close friend. Rei blew through the Shrine gates not thirty seconds later, wheeled around and pulled a few paper wards from her book-bag. If the spirit ignorant enough to fuck with a miko was evil in any way this would end badly for the spirit soon.

Usagi ground to a halt inches before passing through the gate. She felt something again but couldn't tell if this was good or bad. There was some sort of odd resistance that made moving through the gate harder for her.

Usagi's struggle at the gate was just the kind of opening Rei was waiting for.

Rei snapped her wrist and a ward zipped over to the spirit at the gate. The paper projectile flew true and appeared to stick right on the spirit's forehead. The ward tried to activate, but Usagi was not evil. Spiritual power washed over Usagi without doing any harm and the spent ward felt to the ground lifeless. Rei soon followed. For the briefest moment before fainting, Rei saw Usagi clearly.

_"Please leave her for a moment, Honored Spirit, I will take care of my granddaughter."_

It was Rei's Grandfather. He was looking Usagi in the eyes! Maybe the elder Hino was ki sensitive like the Amazons and Ranma?

Usagi bowed to the shrine priest and left.

* * *

Draco Malfoy banished the sick off of his robes. Then he threw up again, not that there was anything left in his stomach. The Scion of the Malfoy line would have to have some breakfast in him before the dry heaves had any more ammunition. That had been the worst night young Draco had experienced in a very long time.

He first thought that a summons from the Dark Lord was a good thing. He knew that his father had been on a mission to track down that damned Potter. They must have returned! Surely they were going to give Draco a crack at the Gryffindor role model before sending him to whatever hell his parents are writhing in.

No. Father had not returned. Harry Potter was not a stain on the Dark Lord's wall.

Draco's night really went to hell the moment he saw his mother 'entertaining' a group of robed Death Eaters in the center of the meeting chamber. He'd seen other women in the same position... he'd even dreamed about being one of those faceless men abusing either Granger or Lovegood or the Weaslette after that dismal failure of an attack on the Department of Mysteries led by Malfoy Senior. This was not how those dreams went. His family was loyal, wasn't it? His mother was above such abuse, wasn't she?

Apparently young Draco was mistaken.

He didn't immediately throw up the contents of his stomach on seeing his own mother being tormented so, but he did flinch for all to see. Bad move. Bellatrix had been expecting him to flinch and so got to be the first to tag him with her wand.

"Imperio!"

Draco was no longer in control of his own mind. He did not have the strength of Potter to throw off such magical bindings. He stepped into the ring of cloaked men surrounding the Ladies Malfoy and began to participate.

That was last night. That was hours before Draco Malfoy threw up on his own robes. Once the Imperius spell had been lifted, Draco was casually dismissed from the chambers. His mother was not so lucky.

Only half an hour ago, Draco had been summoned yet again. This time he had been told to get his mother back to her own bedchambers so that she may recover 'for future engagements'. He did as he was told and then he found a dark corner to paint with bile and stomach leavings. The house elves may clean the mess from the floor but they would not be able to clean that horrid night from his memory.

Draco desperately cataloged reasons why blame could be placed solely on Potter. It had to be Potter's fault. Malfoys were above reproach. Malfoys were never in error. Father would have returned to bask in the glory that was the pureblood way of life... were it not for Harry Potter. Scarhead must pay for the suffering and humiliation the House of Malfoy has suffered.

* * *

The 'Outer' Senshi and Chibi-usa were impressed. They did not expect a British boy or girl to know the proper way of cooking rice. Harry informed them through Michiru that she learned in one week of simple food preparation courses in China. Harry and her friends in Jusenkyo prepared and ate rice with every meal. Aside from cooking and training, there were few other activities with which to keep one's self occupied in a valley long ignored by technological progress and time.

As Harry prepared the rice, the other girls put together sashimi, fresh vegetables and miso soup. Harry was polite to everyone and the girls were polite right back. The older teens wanted to forget their unfortunate greeting and the younger two were just too happy to see the blonde girl breathing and moving. This was much better than the nightmares frequenting both Hotaru's and Chibi-Usa's dreams which had Usagi lifeless and unmoving at the bottom of a dark pool of water.

These nightmares had been especially harsh since both girls knew that the bad images had a strong basis in reality.

Harry's story was told over dinner in simple form by Interpreter Michiru. Imagine condensing Harry's life into a thirty page children's picture book and that's about what the witch was able to get across. Haruka and Michiru frequently whispered back and forth about the accuracy and believability of the girl's story. She mentioned at the start that 'magic water' changed her from boy to girl and she could change again with water. She also proceeded to ignore that part of her background and told the tale of a sad little boy who was told on his birthday that he could do magic and how was allowed to go to magic school. 'He' saved a girl from a troll. 'He' killed a big snake. 'He' went back in time to save a man with a star's name. 'He' could fly on a broom really good. 'His' people were at war. The war was between light, good magic people and dark, bad magic people. The older girls didn't like hearing that part but chose to stay quiet. It was hard to ask trick questions and smoke out lies when you didn't speak the right language.

Chibi-usa didn't question any of it. She had heard it all before in bedtime stories. She heard the English versions at that. No one asked if Chibi-usa could understand Harry. She didn't care either. Little girls didn't react well to having their Mommy stuck in a magic spring waiting to be freed by the handsome prince of a magic kingdom far far away. She knew who the handsome prince was. Grown-up secrets were so very hard to keep when you justed want to tell those who love you where it hurt so they could make the pain go away. In the pink haired girl's opinion, reading a fairy tale at bedtime was much fun. Living through one sucked.

Hotaru was hooked. This story was great! Surely Usa-chan would have tried to stay away from this 'Other' Usagi if she were lying or were dangerous at all. Dragons! Really big snakes! A school for magic! Hotaru wanted to move to England right away. In a school full of magical children, she wouldn't be the freak anymore, would she? Mommy or boy or whatever, this Harry Potter was kind and polite and sounded like a nice girl. They could be friends, right?

Harry finished her story. ".. and so the Dark Lord entered my dreams and made me see the wrong thing. It was a trap. I was tricked and Sirius died to save me."

Michiru set down her tea and translated the last lines. Sure England was dangerous, but Hotaru knew Japan was too. Before anyone could begin interrogating Harry further, a familiar face returned.

"_Good evening, everyone_."

Setsuna had returned. The two younger girls jumped up. It was Hugs Time.

_"Puu!" "Setsuna-momma!"_

Harry finally figured out how to get Cuteness and her friend off her person. Find Hotness. Harry resisted the urge to go get a hug and cop a feel.

"Hello again, Harry." Setsuna said. "I apologize for leaving you so abruptly. Still, you seem to be getting along well."

Setsuna did a quick visual review to check the mood of the room. Michiru was relieved. Tired of translating, no doubt. Haruka seemed like she was hiding something. Harry looked like a mix of the other two. Relieved _and _hiding something. Hotaru looked like she was really enjoying the evening even before Setsuna announced herself. Small Lady was something else entirely. She seemed so happy and yet also so desperate. She had already latched onto Harry in a way that could have been bad for Harry's short term mental health.

Setsuna had been observing Harry most of all. Setsuna would have told you before leaving the house that the immature wizard stood a good chance of being scared away by these girls even if she had stayed to supervise the introductions except... except the Time Gates showed Pluto that her time was better spent elsewhere. What she missed out on needed to happen without her. Clearly, it was a good thing for the boy-turned-girl to be telling stories over dinner.

After a brief and fierce hug, Cuteness let go of Hotness and came back to Harry.

"Ouf!" Harry grunted.

Cuteness came back to Harry's lap and reclaimed her new favorite chair. Harry didn't know why this girl needed her so much but in the end it didn't matter. Harry was beginning to find that this girl was something he needed, something he never got before. Harry wasn't willing to use the 'L' word, but it felt right. She didn't speak the same language, or at least hadn't tried to anyway... but to just look into her eyes when she's looking back at Harry. That was how the Weasleys looked at each other. That's how Hermione's parents looked at her at King's Cross Station and how Hermione looked back at her parents. Harry rested her chin on top of Cuteness's pink locks, closed her eyes and sighed. Chibi-usa melted back into Harry's lap and closed her eyes too. Neither Harry nor Chibi-usa realized just how warm and adorable they looked together to everyone else in the room.

'Wow, that was quick.' And the best part was that Pluto hadn't even lifted a finger. With Harry's childhood background, he would _not_ walk away from Small Lady after bonding so well. It's a shame Usagi wasn't around to see this.

Usagi could not move away from the unbelievably wonderful scene she was witnessing. She had partially hidden herself in the wall so that Harry couldn't see her. Those two were soooooo cute together. Even Usagi herself had rarely displayed such a warm love for the time traveling girl who Usagi knew she would give birth to one day. It was more of a sister-ish thing the bigger and smaller Sailor Moons had recently. Did Mamoru have such a loving connection with Chibi-usa? Usagi thought he did but then if Chibi was here than where was the supposed father figure, anyway?

After dinner Setsuna had Harry change back into her white tang now that it was clean. The Mini Moni outfit was not proper attire for the Boy-Who-Lived to make an appearance in. It was time to say hello to the 'Inner' Senshi at Hikawa Shrine so everyone got into Setsuna's auto. Harry saw the logo on the front grill proved the auto was a BMW but Harry didn't know anything about BMW other than the company's German origins and the fact that it's a well known auto company. Sometimes being stuck between two worlds made her feel like she belonged to neither one. Frustrating to say the least... but Harry hoped desperately that her escape from Privet Drive this summer would help to fix that problem. She already learned more about Japan in a few short hours than she had ever learned in her entire life previously and her time in China was no less revealing.

The ride was smooth and quiet. Chibi-usa was in Harry's lap the whole way. Usagi trailed the auto after getting Harry to see she was back.

Setsuna had given Harry a stylish travel bag (not a purse not a purse not a purse) to Harry which was just big enough to handle the Scepter of Prissiness, Harry's wand, enchanted loot and her pensive. Setsuna was now sure that, for good or ill, Harry's first change in front of everyone had the potential to blow it all to hell or to really bring everyone closer. A brief history lesson would follow as long as Harry survived the first five minutes of being a bloke surrounded by boy-hungry Senshi. These key turning points seemed to be common both in the Senshi's past and in Mister Potter's as well.

Setsuna had slipped back to the Gate to review Harry's life to date again after seeing Harry and Small Lady pulling so close together so quickly. None of those English fan-girls got anything out of Harry after years of trying. In contrast, Chibi-usa practically owned the young man's soul in mere minutes. Miss Weasley better see the writing on the wall. Odds were good that the three closest witches to Harry would have to accept Harry having a nine year old 'daughter' if it came to that. Lots of potential drama.

Pluto was really beginning to enjoy this incarnation in the Mortal Plane. It was rarely boring.

On the way from their parking space to the Shrine gates, Hotness walked in step with Harry on his left as Chibi-usa monopolized his right arm. "Harry?"

'Yes Hotness?' "Yes Setsuna?"

Setsuna had been giving the accidental blonde helpful tips in-between her brief interactions with the other older teens. It was time for one more.

"It will be safe to use your wand tonight, if you so desire." Hotness had that 'everything will be okay' look in her eyes.

"Are you certain? I'm pretty sure either Dumbledore or Voldemort can track me when I use it. Probably both of them."

He really didn't want the girls to see how bad things could get. These Senshi were very nice company. He had to remind himself that they had more experience fighting evil than he did. Much more, actually.

Hotness responded with absolute confidence. "Of course your headmaster will know. I can guarantee that he will be waiting for us just inside of the shrine gates when the meeting is over and he'll have another professor beside him. I also know for a fact that English Death Eaters will not target you here in Japan."

She conveniently left open the option for Harry to battle forces of darkness with a more local flavor.

Usagi was alternately loving and hating this. She could see them and hear them, but Setsuna kept using English with Harry and Usagi understood less than one word in ten. At least she could listen in on the other Outers gossiping about Harry and Chibi-usa a few meters ahead. They found 'his' story hard to believe, but clearly Sailor Pluto and Sailor Chibi Moon were solidly on the English magical's side. Those two were hard to argue against under the best of circumstances.

"I'm not ready to go back to England." Harry muttered.

Harry glanced forward to the ghost just behind the other girls and then she glanced down at Chibi-usa on her arm. Cuteness seemed to have a new nervous tension about her as she looked towards the leading group of girls. Could Chibi-usa tell a ghost was tailing those girls?

"You have an escape plan, then?"

Harry was sure that having the Headmaster show up meant that her time here was limited... but then Pluto had already assured her that she would get weeks of vacation time here in Japan. Was Pluto wrong before? Was she less powerful than she let on? Was Albus going to turn Harry into Severus Snape's bitch later tonight?

"You think we need an escape plan?" Setsuna grinned. There was no doubt in her face as to the outcome of this meeting. There was no fear of the Headmaster. None.

Harry nearly shed tears of joy. He knew this was just a crush. Oh, but what a crush. Harry knew without doubt that we was not worthy of Hotness. It was her eyes, her infinitely deep dark red eyes. They said Dumbledore was going to be humiliated by a bunch of girls. Everyone would want to see her pensive memory of Magical Alien Royal Super-Veela unleashing tactical and strategic level Planetary Avatar Whoop-Ass on the most powerful man in the Wizarding World. Dumbles better bring some of those adult nappies muggles have. He would need need them.

Usagi stopped and waited as the first group of girls passed through the temple gate. She wanted to go in with Harry and her daughter. When The second group did make it to the gate, they could hear the other three beginning to meet and greet with what sounded like four more girls. Okay, Harry cheated. She knew how many planets there are and counted. She also knew Earth has only ever had male avatars and that this Mamoru guy was not going to show up tonight.

One minute later, Harry walked into the Hikawa Shrine's Super Secret Senshi Meeting Room with Cuteness on one arm and Hotness on the other. Usagi was behind them giggling in excitement.

"Welcome back, Princess!" Four girls in colorful kimonos spoke their greeting in English and bowed in front of Harry, Hotness, Cuteness and Usagi. Harry and escort returned the bow.

Oh, wow. These new four were just as super-veela hot as he thought they would be. Let's see... Blonde, Black, Blue and Brunette. Jaw off the floor and smile, Potter. "Good evening. My name is Harry Potter. Thank you for inviting me to your beautiful shrine."

The new blonde looked to Harry with bright blue eyes and a sparkling smile. "Thank you for coming! I'm Minako Aino. This lovely shrine miko to my left is our hostess tonight."

Before Harry could respond, her nearest companion made a half step forward. The raven haired classic Japanese beauty bowed again. "Konbanwa. Watashi wa Hino Rei desu."

The blue haired girl followed Rei's example in propriety. "Good evening. My name is Ami Mizuno. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Batting cleanup was the tallest girl there, the brunette. "Konbanwa! Watashi wa Kino Makoto desu."

Harry was not known, even in her own head, for being smooth or socially skilled so she tried for honest and positive. "Thank you for inviting me to your beautiful temple Miss Hino. Miss Aino. Miss Mizuno. Miss Kino. I hope to become good friends with you all."

Through the whole introduction, Minako and Makoto pinned Harry with their bright, eager smiles. Ami seemed a bit on the quiet side. Wallflower? Hermione-esque know-it-all? Harry was fine with know-it-alls. She needed them to keep her alive. Rei was... nervous? She kept looking around like she expected to see someone else there.

Harry momentarily ignored the feel of cat whiskers by her feet as she had felt a lot of that in Hogwarts. Then something different happened. Two whispering voices started a back and forth conversation between Harry's feet. She looked down.

Talking cats. Now she's seen everything, right? "Let me guess, you two have human forms as well, don't you?" One of them actually blushed. The other cat looked away and started whistling. Harry laughed.

The white one stopped whistling and looked up. "Your smell is different than Usagi's, like there are two scents. Have you been with a boy recently?"

Harry froze up for a second. Actually everyone who understood English did.

"Has your owner gotten you fixed yet?" A red faced Harry hissed. "I could pay for it if there's a money problem."

The yet to be named white cat backed off slowly with his ears down. A lighting quick hand snatched up the white cat by the scruff of his neck. Minako was red faced. Looks like her 'pet' was getting kicked out as she moved to the door and hissed furiously in the cat's ear.

"Anyone for pizza and cookies?" Hotness to the rescue.

Everyone conveniently forgot Bad Kitty in favor of sausage and peperoni. Over the next fifteen minutes, most girls ate while Hotness delivered a professional quality presentation putting Harry's basic background and Hogwarts career into perspective. As Harry already knew about the Moon Kingdom in broad strokes, this was more about telling the girls about Harry Potter, a.k.a. The Boy-Who-Lived, Troll Beater, Basilisk Slayer, Wicked Seeker and Student Wizard. Just like over dinner at the Outer's house, the girls were mixed on their reactions. Rei was having trouble believing. Ami wanted proof Harry was a boy. The others were interested. Hotness was doing well but Harry would have to prove her point. She could tell Hotness was getting back to Jusenkyo. Harry poured a hot tea and moved it close to her hand. Cuteness who was nervous before was starting to shake like a leaf on Harry's left side. Something was about to go wrong. Rei noticed and so did Minako and the polite talking cat.

Setsuna looked back to Harry and nodded. With one free hand, Harry pulled out the kanzashi and allowed her golden hair to fall back across the seat cushion she was on. She stuck her fingers in the hot tea cup and changed. There was a room full of gasps. Even Setsuna was impressed by actually seeing the change. She knew it could happen, but seeing it happen was different than knowing it could happen.

Cuteness was about to fall apart. Her death grip on Harry's left arm only grew tighter and a pained moan leaked out of the girl. Harry looked down to her face to see that she had her eyes shut tight and tears flowed over each cheek.

Cuteness was killing him. This was wrong. By now all the girls had followed his face to her's and even the love struck of the group knew this was a bad reaction. Harry wouldn't freeze this time. His right hand snaked out and he aimed his wand at the teapot. The teapot was out of arms reach, but that was a problem magic could fix. Harry hit the pot with a cooling charm. The outside faces visibly frosted over. He accio's the ceramic pot and banished the pot lid which shattered against the opposite wall. As soon as the pot slid under his hand, he dropped the wand and stuck his fingers in. Instant girl. More gasps.

Harry turned left, drying her fingers on her pants as they flew over to Cuteness's wet cheek. Harry tried desperately to do for Chibi-usa's crying, broken form what Usagi had done for her when she came back out of the pensive and collapsed. She didn't think little Cuteness could understand any of it, but the soft whispering tone and the constant stream of encouragement and support was beginning to turn the nine year old around. Senshi opinion of Harry, which had begun to head south with Chibi-Usa's panic attack had flipped back into positive numbers with her excellent saving throw versus panicking nine year olds.

"I'm so sorry, Love. If you don't want to see that man again, you won't see him. I promise on my magic." The other girls saw a light blue light flare on the wand sitting a meter away from Harry's hand. Luckily for Harry and his growing Japanese fan club, Cuteness had no intention of holding her to it.

Eyes went wide when Cuteness replied in English. "n-no.. that's n-not i-it"

Harry closed her eyes and took two long breaths. She picked up the enchanted kanzashi and slid them back into place. The natural born girls in the room got a magic fashion show as Harry's now standard single bun and braid pattern re-applied itself with mechanical precision in five seconds with no effort on Harry's part. WANT.

Harry whispered into her ear. "Can you tell me?" Cuteness looked around and then straight down.

"Can you tell someone else?" Harry asked. Cuteness shook her head 'no'.

"You can tell me, but not here?" She tried again.

Cuteness hesitated before whispering. "They can't know. It's _secret_."

"Can anyone else know?" Harry prodded gently.

"Puu can. Momma too." 'What?'

"Momma?" Harry asked.

"I see dead people. I know she's here."

Nobody told Harry this little girl could speak English. They might have said something about Usagi and her being related but Harry either wasn't paying full attention or the idea of one being the other's mother was too odd for her to accept. She also had proof that 'seeing dead people' was not a standard Senshi ability. Two for nine and that was with an asterisk on one of them. Harry was sure something did go very wrong, but what?

"Hey, Setsuna. Is there somewhere that you, me and Cuteness here can go to have a private talk?" Harry noticed that Cuteness had flinched at Harry's nickname for her.

Turning her head, Harry spotted not Setsuna but Sailor Pluto. That's one hell of a quick outfit change. She held one end of her jeweled Garnet Rod out to Harry and Chibi-usa.

"I happen to have just the place." She looked over to the other curious and concerned girls._ "We'll be back before you know it."_

Cuteness and then Harry grabbed the near end of Pluto's staff. The three blurred and disappeared. Usagi didn't know if this would work, but she tried to will herself to follow her daughter. Just as she reappeared near the Gate she caught sight of the others. Chibi-usa looked over to her mother's ghost.

"_Hi, Momma. I missed you._" Usagi was floored. Chibi-usa could see her?

"_H-hi, Chibi-usa. I love you sooo much. I was asleep... asleep in a magic spring. I came back as soon as I could. If it weren't for Harry here, I'd still be down there waiting for someone to rescue me_."

Harry and Pluto both watched the conversation and each got something different out of it. Harry could see and hear everything, but didn't know Japanese. Pluto could hear Small Lady's side of the story, but not Usagi's half. She had almost forgot that accepting the form of Setsuna Meioh would limit her abilities so that she could not see the dead in this incarnation. How interesting that Small Lady can. This is new. For the Senshi of Pluto new is usually catastrophically bad.

She must learn one way or the other before they go back.

"_Harry saves lots of people, Momma, just like you do." _Cuteness said.

Usagi nodded in support. "_He's a good boy... man, Harry is a good man. So, Chibi-usa, what's wrong?"_

The little pink haired girl looked down and began to tear up. "_The future Momma. It changed._"

Usagi's eyes bugged out. Behind her, Setsuna froze.

"_But.. but.. HOW? What's different?" _Usagi asked desperately.

"_Please wait, Momma. Let me talk to -sniff- Harry f-first." _Cuteness begged.

Usagi nodded. Chibi-usa turned to the confused blonde who has been listening to a nine year old girl talk to a ghost while Hotness slowly went more and more pale. 'That's a bad look for you Hotness, you should see a healer.' The pink haired mini-senshi locked her eyes on Harry's and appeared to build up her courage. Then, after a clearly visible emotional struggle passed over the girl's face, her courage and her eyes began to shine with hot tears. Chibi-usa lost her internal battle between needing to keep secrets like a grown-up and needing Love and Comfort.

"I... I.. I'm sorry Daddyi'msosorrydaddypleasedon'tleavemedaddyilove -hic- youiloveyouineedyoudaddy -hic- dontleavemedaddy... love you... so sorry... don't...leave.." Cuteness fell apart in Harry's lap.

Harry tightly held the sobbing girl on her lap as she and Usagi stared at each other. Usagi may not know much English, but as a girly-girl in good standing she knew what her daughter had just blurted out to the young wizard-turned-witch sitting not two meters away.

It just didn't... but what about... _Daddy?... _really?

As soon as Chibi-usa began to enter her incoherent babble phase, Pluto turned to the Gates and began to scan for changes past, present and future. Soon enough (relatively speaking) she found Jusenkyo to be the key. With Usagi missing in action for so long, Mamoru began to doubt the future. Then he began to take his Guardianship of the Earth to include more than just Tokyo and Japan. He met other women. Mamoru didn't regain interest in Usagi until after her own change of heart. Pluto would have to remember that junction just in case. She located Usagi's resurrection. Oh. Wow. Potter was no avatar per say but he had his strengths and he could do the knight-in-shining-armor bit flawlessly. She scanned ahead to Crystal Tokyo. Still there, thank the All-Father. Hold on... Crystal Tokyo was... better? She scanned more world history. Talk about your butterfly effect. With the old timeline, Usagi was Japanese and married Japanese. Her future kingdom was firm but the Royal Couple looked to Tokyo first and the rest of the world second. Due to this focus, Japan was saved from darkness on many occasions when other nations were lost to war and anarchy. That was the future Pluto had been working towards. This new future was not so focused on one city or even one country. In this new future Usagi married Harry Potter from England thus tying the future of Crystal Tokyo with that of Magical Britain and by extension the Wizarding World. This was big. Worse, the future was still in motion. Jusenkyo must not be done fucking with her. All of her work to pin down the future with King Endymion was wasted. Pluto looked over to the pink haired Usagi Small Lady Serenity. Was that even her name anymore? Would she still exist by the end of Potter's vacation? Pluto couldn't trust the Gates under these conditions.

Enough. Pluto's priority here was Crystal Tokyo. Chibi-usa would be her litmus test while away from the Gates for the near future until Harry Potter returned to England. Potter could be Small Lady's father, for now. If things went to shit, she could still redirect Mamoru Chiba. He wouldn't be as effective anymore but Mamoru would do as a backup plan.

Pluto looked away from the Gates of Time and Space right as she would have seen what had sent Chibi-usa into hysterics in the first place. Just like in the old timeline, this new Chibi-usa spent nine centuries as a young girl both in body and mind. Unlike last time, she did not get to keep both parents for the duration. Centuries into Pluto's future, and centuries into Chibi-usa's past, a Dark Army unknown to the past timeline assaulted the crystal spires of Tokyo for one brutal month before King Potter returned early from terraforming Mars to personally lead the Sol System's armies and the Senshi to a great victory. Much like his English predecessor in heroism, Admiral Lord Nelson, Harry Potter was struck down shortly before his forces claimed total victory. The wound was both cursed and fatal. Dark powers used in the killing blow prevented Queen Serenity's magicks from bringing her husband back from the dead.

The immortal child Chibi-usa has not seen her Daddy alive in over three hundred years.

* * *

"Ah, Severus. I trust you have the first set of potions with you?" Headmaster Dumbledore began preparing to leave for Japan as soon as the trace on Harry Potter's wand went active again.

Odd spell choices. One wonders why the boy felt such lowly spells so vital that he would come out of hiding for them. A binding magical vow was made. That was disappointing. Mr. Potter should not be doing anything which could threaten the future health and stability of Magical England. Taking oaths in foreign lands could not possibly be good for Albus's plans.

"Yes Headmaster. The little shit won't get away with his disrespect any longer." In truth, Snape had been tweaking his concoctions. Now they would hurt more. Harry Potter would pay for keeping Snape from what was rightfully his. Potter would also pay for any reason Severus may happen to come up with at a moments notice. The Potions Master came prepared with a large selection of dark potions and elixirs. Most were the kind Dumbledore couldn't identify by sight and would therefore trust Snape's descriptions for. It was wonderful what a little false humility and fake regret could get you.

Albus called for the weak but functional phoenix to leave his perch and prepare for travel. Soon enough, two wizards were engulfed in the magical fire of phoenix pyrotranslocation.

* * *

"Andrews, what news?" Lord Voldemort had just had the remains of Drake removed from his chambers. That had been most entertaining.

The Death Eater in question looked up at his master. "My Lord. Wormtail has assured me that the wards on Potter's Privet Drive property continue to weaken. Still, he is requesting your leave to target the Dursley family outside of home."

Voldemort believed that manipulationg Potter's dreams over summer break was a good way to weaken the boy last year. This year, however, was different. Despite the wards, Potter had been far more vulnerable to the Dark Lord's powers while at Privet Drive than after whatever it was the boy had done to burn Voldemort's forehead. His link to Potter was gone. Lost was the joy of tormenting the boy morning, noon and night through bloody visions and a mountain of forced despair. Also lost was the free power that Voldemort had stolen from the boy through their connection. The Potions Master's 'occlumency lessons' had been a true boon there. Voldemort had actually been forced to give Snape a token nod of respect on hearing how he had gotten the Headmaster's open encouragement to mind rape the boy and intentionally open the connection further. How that old fool expected Potter to use _love_ to defeat the Greatest Dark Lord in History was beyond him.

A doe messenger patronus flew into the hall and delivered a brief report from their 'traitor'. "Potter has been spotted in Japan. Headmaster and I will grab the shit and bring him home. Potter's personal hell shall manifest in the name of the Greater Good within the hour."

The Dark Lord sent a hate fueled dark patronus to consume the messenger. It was his new toy. Attempts by messenger patroni to evade were well worth the time required to research the obscure charm.

Voldemort finally turned his gaze back to Andrews. "Talk to Bella. I want to host a little party at Diagon Alley when students are likely to be getting ready for Hogwarts."

"Yes, My Lord." The minion bowed low.

"Dismissed."

Andrews was new, but he was competent. Voldemort would give the man just enough rope to hang himself with. Perhaps the man may even do something useful with the latitude given and prove himself worthy of continued service. New inner circle members would have to rise through the ranks soon if the Dark Lord wanted to replace Malfoy and the others who died in disgrace halfway around the world.

* * *

"Dobby?"

POP

"Yes Missy Granger?" Good. She and Ginny didn't know if the little free elf could hear anyone who called for him at any time or not. She could have been lucky that first time.

"First, I'd like to thank you for your help with my research. Without your help I would have gone batty with the lack of books in Molly's home."

Hermione shook the elf's hand while Ginny tried hard to hide her amusement. The way her muggleborn friend interacted with Dobby was just funny. Ginny wondered if Hermione was ever going to bother with researching the house elves themselves. If she did, she'd know why they are such loyal and eager workers. Any pureblood knew the house elf origin stories, even poor purebloods who didn't have any elves of their own. Funny as it was, Ginny would point out the right books in Hogwarts once the two witches actually got back to school.

"Dobby is only too happy to help Missy Granger and Missy Weasley! Does Missy want Dobby to fix the doors or to mend the wash or to iron the parchments or to-"

"That's enough, thank you. I do have a job for you, though. Can you get these letters Ginny and I have written to Harry for us?" She put on her eager and friendly face. She didn't need to. Dobby would have said yes to a Malfoy sneer if it meant delivering letters to The Great Harry Potter Sir.

"Oh, Yes! Thank you Missy Granger, Missy Weasley. Dobby will be a good elf and drop these letters right over to the Great Harry Potter Sir right this minute."

So he did.

POP

* * *

After calming down her... his daughter, the small group who had traveled to the Gates with Pluto returned to the Senshi meeting. While Harry figured they had spent nearly an hour talking and crying and calming down, the return trip was just where/when Pluto said it would be. Pluto refused to comment when the other girls started pelting the trio with questions. Chibi-usa and Harry were similarly tight lipped except for the even closer cuddling they had been doing upon return. Harry still needed time to process it all.

That is exactly why she used hot water again, with Chibi's permission, and then went on to deliver a brief introduction for his birth form. His last 'feminine' move was to undo Chibi-usa's ponytails and move 'her' kanzashi over to the nine(plus nine hundred) year old girl's hair. Harry's single bun and braid combo was adorable in pink. Once more, Harry transfigured a goblet, filled it with water, heated it and dipped a hand in.

He followed this with a selection of minor yet showy charms, transfigurations and a hex or two. His wanded patronus, while not up to Scepter of Prissiness standards, was more than enough to get most of the girls to want to feed the pretty glowing stag.

Unseen by most, Usagi floated through the stag once and blushed. She tried to get the idea of that emotional/spectral heat out of her mind. Too late. She then began plotting for Harry's next shower to be a bit more entertaining.

With a small mental nudge, Harry pushed the patronus to lick Chibi-usa's face. Finally. The frown slowly turned upside down and Harry got to see real happiness from his... _her_. That's just not fair. Harry Potter just learned that whatever effect the little girl had on him before was magnified tenfold by the 'D'-word. His next patronus was going to be based off his... _daughter_... smiling at him and it was going to be his strongest patronus to date.

Harry was really getting used to this. His humble magic skills were easily able to wow the audience of Senshi. Setsuna may have gone off to 'freshen up' but the others were eating it up. That's when he got upstaged by his occasional comic relief.

POP

"HarryPotterSirHarryPotterSir ! Dobby has letters for you from Missy Granger and Missy Weasley!"

The Senshi less one switched over from amused to being a hair's breadth from naked whirly light shows and violent retribution. Then the worshipful posture that the 'thing' took for Mister Potter turned their potentially violent encounter into a hysterical giggle fit. As the girls recovered, Harry dismissed Dobby and set the two folded parchments into his travel bag (not a purse not a purse not a purse). Minako was got very suggestive in her offers of compensation should he read the 'letters from witches' aloud. Makoto egged her on.

Pluto re-entered the room. She was in uniform. All silliness ground to a halt.

"Ladies and Gentleman. It's getting late and we have uninvited English guests at the front gate. Please change so that we may send these grumpy old men home the hard way." Pluto called before repeating her call in Japanese.

Every girl pulled out an object of power. Just before everyone transformed on the spot, Michiru called to Harry, "Excuse, please. You turning around as not to see?"

Harry blushed and nodded before turning around. Minako and Makoto jogged around to his new front, giggling and winking at him the whole way. Usagi was equal parts amused at her friends' fun flirty attitude and furious that the target of said attitude was her babydaddy. She had to remember that they don't know about the Great Daddy Switch yet. This was going to take some thinking.

Outside, the Headmaster was twirling away with his wand in a scan of the Hikawa Shrine wards. He was delighted. They were much older than anything he had seen before and yet still remarkably effective. Snape's Dark Mark was burning something fierce and there was nothing Dumbledore could do to stop it. Fawkes refused to help. After all, Fawkes was a light creature and that mark was as dark as they came.

Albus looked up as a long series of bright colorful flashes lit up the paper screen walls of the main shrine building from the inside. Soon, Mister Potter made a rather showy entrance surrounded by a nine colorfully dressed attractive young women. He was having great difficulty seeing any specific facial features on those young women... a charm of some sort no doubt. Odd, they did not give off the aura of having magical cores. No, not muggle girls either. Perhaps these were some of the 'magical girls' Miss Granger had been so eager to inform the Order about.

Albus was about to build up the kind grandfather persona he had mastered before muggles had learned to fly when his temperamental Potions Master seemed unable to hold in his bile and hate any longer.

"You despicable little bastard! Leave your half-breed whores and come with us before I'm forced to show you what you are supposed to do with lowborns like your mother!"

Five of nine Senshi immediately knew what he said. The Mercury computer translated for the other four girls two hundred and twenty-seven thousandths of a second later. One ghost got two words right and guestimated the rest pretty well.

Snape was going to pay for those words. His suffering would be legendary. It would commence in three... two... one...

**End Chapter**

REV 08/2012


	9. Like Father Like Daughter

**Chapter Nine: Like Father Like Daughter**

Still August 9th, 1996

Albus, upon reflection, was quite happy with the way this was turning out. Clearly Harry chose to be stubborn if his escort was any indication. No teenaged boy would willingly walk away from this kind of female attention to get married of to Severus Snape. Well, perhaps when Albus was young, but... where was he? Oh, yes. These girls were not taking Severus's Potions classes and therefore were not likely to take his insults quietly. Perhaps the Headmaster might learn a thing or two about 'magical girl' combat before putting the dears to sleep and collecting his wayward Gryffindor.

The Senshi took up a formation for splattering short range targets. Pluto and Chibi Moon stood by Harry while the others formed a loose line a few meters ahead. In the center of this line, Venus, Mercury and Saturn became the anchor that the other four girls in line could work from. Saturn brought the Silence Glaive into a blocking position.

Severus adopted his 'Fifty Points from Gryffindor' sneer and slowly drew his wand. As they were outside of English lands, they were also outside of Wizengamot authority. Albus may look at him with that 'you kicked my puppy' look later, but he was going to enjoy some dark magic tonight.

While Albus was able to maintain his kindly grandfather's appearance for anyone watching, inside he was beginning to sweat. These girls didn't feel like threats when they were walking out of the shrine, but that changed as soon as Severus requested that Mister Potter return to England in Snape's own personal idiom. Clearly the young ladies took offense. With his enchanted glasses, Albus could see each girl become swamped in their own magical auras the likes of which even the ley line channeled through Hogwarts' primary wardstones could not match.

Snape snapped his wand up sharply, releasing a powerful and fast cutting curse right at Potter's chest. If he was lucky, one of these twats would 'sacrifice' herself and take the curse for him. That is the king of thing light sided fools and ill trained dunderheads would do. Still, he didn't wait for the first curse to hit. Only Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs waited before casting the second and third strike.

Even as Harry saw the dark blue arc of magic burst out of Snivellus's wand he knew the girls had this one. Chibi Moon's glove covered right hand was loosely held in his left. He felt no signs of tension pass through the grasp. Hell, yes, standing there and watching the incoming curse without attempting to block or dodge was the most Gryffindor thing he'd ever done.

As the dark blue battle magic sped past Saturn she finished her incantation, Silence Wall. Jupiter and Uranus both shot off the mark when Snape's wand hand started moving and they were now close to landing twenty meters behind him. After the cutter washed over Pluto's personal shield spell Saturn's Silence Wall caught three more progressively dark magical attacks before Venus yelled one command to the Senshi still in line,_"Light him up!"_

Venus didn't bother to mention that they'd be going with the weak stuff. It was only one man. Moon could have taken this prick in her first year of youma busting. Okay, okay. She would have had to get past a Dark General or two first and needed Tuxedo Mask's help near the end. This guy doesn't stand around all day and talk about how totally awesome he is and how you're totally about to die. Thousands of kilometers away, Draco Malfoy sneezed.

As soon as the color coded whores started... dancing, Snape almost lowered his wand in disappointment. What in Merlin's name were they going to do? Strip-tease him to death?

Saturn dropped the Silence Wall just as a rainbow of elemental death rolled past her position.

Snape revised his opinion of the situation. Panic is good. Snape turned on his heel to apparate out just as Death had gotten to first base on him. The Potions Master was not completely in control during his emergency maneuver and left a bit of himself behind. To be more precise, he left much of his left foot behind.

Elemental death reached the forgotten appendage and cremated his foot instantly.

Snape fell to the ground a short distance away cursing at his new and painful disfigurement the whole time. So angry was he – and so aggrieved at losing his foot - that he didn't notice he was on fire. A small patch of his hair was kissed by Mars Fire right before he managed to apparate. This was not good for him. Greasy as his locks tended to be, the flames quickly spread to cover his whole head. Aguamenti fixed that, but only until Jupiter's knee pinned him to the ground and her hand snatched his wand. When he began to struggle, her closed fist smashed into the back of his skull and Snivellus took a nap.

Less than twenty seconds after Snape's first spell, Albus Dumbledore began to clap in recognition of an admittedly superb performance by the opposition.

"I must say, ladies, that you do your country proud. I have not seen such teamwork in the magical world since I defeated Dark Lord Grindelwald thus bringing about the end of the magical aspect of the Second Great War as muggles call it."

Let them know who they are up against. Only a wizard scholar of Dumbledore's caliber could understand the lessons of the past and apply them properly. The poor dears simply didn't understand Mister Potter's place in the grand scheme of things like he did.

Or so Dumbledore thought anyway.

Pluto chose to reply. "If magical Europe has fallen to such low standards as your associate just displayed then perhaps the problem lies in leadership and not in the common citizen."

Score one for Sailor Hotness! Take that your Chief Sorcerer Supreme Mugwump-ness.

The Headmaster affected a look of disappointment. Unfortunately for him, that look only worked on English magicals and those international magicals who didn't have a deep hatred of the English. It did nothing for the Japanese Senshi or their newly adopted princess.

"You simply must understand. What I do is done for the Greater Good of mankind." Albus replied gravely.

The Headmaster knew that arguing would not win him the boy after such a slight as the one dealt to him. He finished his mental review of their attack on Professor Snape. The girls entered a tactical formation. There was a chain of command. Several girls appeared to be specialists. They had experience, power and skill. And yet, Albus spied potential weaknesses to their attacks. Long before Miss Granger's lecture on oriental magics, Albus had read a scroll titled 'Mahou mo Ken' that described the ancient Japanese discipline of 'Artillery Magic' which seemed very similar to what the girls were using. (1) In exchange for powerful ranged magics, one sacrificed time in casting. Time is what Dumbledore planned to deny them.

In other circumstances, the Headmaster would have requested that the girls either consent to be guest lecturers or join the Hogwarts student population. They may not be true witches but they were clearly powerful magical beings... and with the proper application of amorentia the next generation of magical England would be greatly enhanced. In fact, the more Albus considered that option the more he liked it. At the end of this little misunderstanding he would lay a few compulsion charms on the girls before enervating them. Yes, time to begin.

Every Senshi tensed when they saw the old man begin to twist just like his scorched companion. Minor adjustments in posture allowed for the Senshi to cover every field of view just as the old man disappeared with a soft pop. Teleportation had been a skill used against the girls so often that defending against it was second nature.

-pop-

The old man had chosen to apparate into the core group of Venus, Mercury and Saturn. As soon as the air disturbance registered, Venus and Mercury dove for the ground. Saturn began to swing the butt end of her Silence Glaive around for the only non-lethal strike she had.

Albus cast an area stunner which had served him well in the past expecting to drop all three girls before apparating again. He was caught completely off guard when a staff slammed into his shin. Even worse for him, the three girls immediately around him felt little more than a slap on the cheek.

-pop-

The Headmaster apparated barely avoiding immolation as Mars poured fire through is former position. As soon as he regained his footing, Albus cast disillusionment, notice-me-not and muggle repellant charms. He began to slowly stalk the errant Gryffindor from his new position thirty meters behind Harry's group. Perhaps these girls would 'go quietly' if he could just get his wand into Harry's neck. The Headmaster now added copious obliviations into his post-battle programing scheme.

"_Where is he?" _Mars yelled out.

"_He's fast for an old fossil! How bad is his bite, Venus?" _Jupiter called as she carried the sleeping Potions Master within range of the group.

"_Artemis bites harder! If our new 'Princess' wasn't in danger of getting kidnapped then I'd send half of you home already." _Venus spun around once for a quick overview of the shrine grounds as the other girls moved into a circle around Harry, Pluto and Chibi Moon.

Usagi took to flying around the edge of the group in circles.

Fawkes was just sitting there, perched on the shrine's perimeter wall. Was the bird confident in the Headmaster or was it sitting this battle out?

Harry pulled out both wand and scepter just in case. The girls were really turning him on by pounding on Snape and scaring off the Headmaster but Harry wasn't fitting into his assigned role of 'Damsel in Distress' tonight. Harry Potter may not like being the Boy Who Lived or a Child of Prophecy, but Hermione was dead right when she said he had a 'saving people' thing. Now that the girls seemed to have lost track of the Headmaster, Harry thought he may need to save his own arse if Dumbledore figured out how to get past Senshi magic.

The Headmaster swore. That little one kept holding onto Harry. How was he going to dual apparate them out if she tagged along? Actually... this could work. She was the only one of her group who actually had a magical core. In a year or two, when she was the right age, she would of course be welcomed by Hogwarts with open arms. In the mean time, concessions would be requested in exchange for her happy release from protective custody. Albus was a few meters from being able to pass between two of the magical girls when that odd young spirit came around the circle for the third time. What in Merlin's name did she think she was doing?

What in Merlin's name was Usagi doing? Harry watched her pass in front of him and Sailor Cuteness for the third time in a row. Mercury and Pluto were just off to his side staring at and touching a small palm sized artifact of some sort. Surely he could ask about it later.

"Harry! Harry! Here! Here!" Harry and Sailor Cuteness turned at the same time catching the attention of several other Senshi. Usagi was pointing and zipping around a tight circle of empty space. They hadn't seen Usagi blow straight through the Headmaster, stop and then start circling where she felt something.

Harry's stupefy passed Dumbledore near the old man's waist. The Headmaster's expelliarmus hit Harry's shoulder. As Harry spun around from the impact his wand sailed back over to the Headmaster's location. As soon as Harry was oriented the right direction he watched his wand disappear in one particular patch of space next to Usagi. Harry mentally crossed his fingers and cast expelliarmus with the Scepter of Prissiness at that bit of empty air.

While not every Senshi saw Harry and Chibi Moon spin around, they all saw him cast the stunner. They also all saw the return fire which caught him in the shoulder. By the time Harry's second spell hit the old man, Jupiter, Neptune and Uranus all fired in the Headmaster's general area. Neptune's magic went wide left. Fawkes flamed in to intercept the lightning bolt from Jupiter which would have ended the Headmaster's career. After catching Harry's expelliarmus in the hip, Albus landed quite close to where Uranus's attack detonated. He was thrown several meters through the air and did not land well.

"Finite incantatem." Harry called.

Albus looked around to see a ring of magical girls and one Harry Potter staring down at him. Odd, he expected Harry to show more anger at this point. Albus was defeated and he knew it. Yes, there was a wand in his hand, but it wasn't his. In truth, the other one wasn't his anymore either. Harry had just successfully claimed the Elder Wand and the boy didn't even know it. Even if the boy chose to give it back, the wand knew it's true owner now.

"You are a right mess Headmaster. We can see to your injuries... after I get a magically binding oath from you promising to stop this foolishness and allowing me my freedom."

"Harry, my boy. Be reasonable." Even if it wouldn't work at that moment, the grandfatherly old man persona must always be maintained if it was to be believed. "You are only making Voldemort's campaign against the light easier by continuing this childish feud. Come back before more innocent lives are lost."

"Are innocent lives being lost Headmaster?" Yes! Albus had hopes that he could guilt the boy into coming back.

"Every day while you are exposing yourself to attack, light side families and muggles are targeted by Tom's followers. If you come back with me we can provide you with the chance to defeat him utterly, thus ending the violence."

Harry looked over the Headmaster's form. Albus must have been in some serious pain during all of this. The old man wasn't even trying to cast his way out of the problem. "Innocents like Cedric? Would he still have died at the end of the Third Task had I not been forced by you to participate in a tournament that I did not enter? I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request, sir. You are in need of a healer. We can heal you after you take a vow."

"Very well Harry." The Headmaster looked at the holly and phoenix feather cored wand in his hand. "I do believe I am holding the wrong wand."

Harry looked down. "Quite right." Harry looked around until he found Sailor Jupiter and asked for the wand in her hand. With a nod and a wink, she handed Snape's wand over to Harry. He then proceeded to switch out the phoenix feather core wand for the evil bastard core wand. Harry saw some confusion on the headmaster's face. Ah, he thought he was getting his own wand back.

"I don't believe I'll be letting go of this one quite yet, Sir. You need to be punished for forcing these nice girls to tear up the shrine property." Actually there was quite a mess. Walls were toppled and grass uprooted. A few old statues seemed to have scorch marks on them. "Healing you without taking a trophy of some sort would look like you can just get away with smashing shrines and houses and such."

'Besides, it feels natural in my hand, almost better than my original.' Harry felt a need to keep possession of the wand taken from Dumbledore. It was as if the wand wanted to stay with him now.

Albus did not like the deal, but he had no choice. Pluto had come up with the wording of the vow thus making it air tight. Albus could not interfere with Harry's life directly or indirectly, by himself or through proxy, before Harry once again stepped foot in England or Scotland of his own free will.

Saturn used her powers to heal much of the Headmaster's injuries, but could not be persuaded to to the same for Snape. With a vow preventing him from doing anything else, Albus Dumbledore left the shrine with an injured Potions Master and a miniature phoenix who had just risen from his own ashes. Again.

Harry looked around. This place was a mess. Truly, his fellow countrymen did not pick the best of places to have such a confrontation.

"Sailor Mars?" Harry asked the long haired Senshi in red.

She looked in his direction. The Sailor uniform accessories could translate English well enough, so she didn't need an interpreter tonight. "I apologize on behalf of my countrymen for the mess we've made of this lovely shrine. May I use Sailor Moon's scepter to fix it up for you?"

She appeared confused for a moment before slowly nodding.

Scepter of Prissiness out.

"Reparo. Reparo. Reparo..." He continued to hit each char mark and worn spot within visual range. His audience had no idea that the Kaleidomoon Scope could do that.

_"Ladies. No doubt you all have as many new questions as Harry does. I propose we meet again tomorrow afternoon at my home. Perhaps we can make a full weekend of it. Until tomorrow then."_ Pluto bowed and reverted to her pre-combat party dress.

Setsuna led the Outer's and Harry back to the car after some brief farewells. Cuteness fell asleep on Harry's shoulder during the ride home.

As the Outers all piled into Setsuna's car, Rei continued to watch them. A lot happened tonight that didn't make sense as far as she was concerned. The new Princess wasn't Usagi, but was cursed to look like her. Rei saw Usagi at the shrine gates sans body. Chibi-usa was even more attached to this Harry Potter boy than she ever appeared to be with Usagi or Mamoru.

Rei was going to get some answers or she was going to slap the shit out of somebody.

* * *

Late 30th Century A.D., Mare Serenitatis

Queen Serenity the Second lowered her hands to the table she's been focusing her power over for the past two hours. She quenched her thirst and checkedg her work for flaws. Nothing. It's done.

The small scepter that lay before her would be a gift to her daughter when Princess Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter returned from the Past. Forged after countless years studying Auntie Tranquility's treasures deep in the vaults of Phoenix Mountain, Usagi finally finished the one magical focus which could give her and her daughter their much deserved Happily Ever After.

She looked over her work.

The new focus looked like a cross between her old Crescent Moon Wand and the Kaleidomoon Scope with a few enhancements here and there. At thirty-six centimeters in length, most of it's mass was from the smooth crystal shaft that constantly reflected a rainbow through it's translucent surface. Both ends were capped with pure platinum. While the bottom of the shaft ended in a setting focused on a rather impressive ruby, her real achievement was the headpiece. Bracketed by newly forged crystal phoenix wings and resting on a bed of jewels lay a once lost treasure, a crystal crescent moon. This very same piece had once been an heirloom pendant of her aunt, Queen Tranquility, and was gifted to a young English wizard by the Phoenix Tribe before Serenity had even met him. It was that crescent moon pendant in conjunction with the Kaleidomoon Scope which Harry Potter used to raise Usagi from the dead.

Of course they began shag- errrr, _dating_ that very same evening.

It was a later that the crescent moon pendent would become a lost treasure. It was lost, completely shattered in fact, when Galaxia ambushed Sailor Moon's English allies in an effort to fill Sailor Moon's heart with hopelessness and despair. While the pendant was nothing more than a pile of shards, Sailor Moon defeated the darkness within Galaxia and returned life to her loved ones. It was this victory that allowed Serenity to truly begin work on Crystal Tokyo.

Many centuries later Serenity's power, love and need somehow failed to recall her husband's spirit to the land of the living after he heeded the Call to Arms one time too many. In her mourning, Serenity remembered the crystal pendant which played such an important role in her own return. She had hope though at first there was little more than hope. None of her close advisers understood enough about the magic used to block Harry's resurrection nor did they know the inner workings of Serenity's Lunar power. The Queen would have to discover the answer to her problem through much research, experimentation and no small outpouring of tears. Mother and daughter would mourn their loss together over long centuries, maintaining their Kingdom using their hard earned magical knowledge to slowly reclaim the once fertile worlds of the lost Silver Millennium. All throughout this time Queen Serenity, Princess Mercury and a select few others continued to research crystal magical focii.

In mere days, Cuteness would return to her mother. They would channel their combined love for 'Just' Harry and bring his lazy ghost ass back. The Crystal Millennium would begin and it would surpass both Crystal Tokyo and the older Silver Millennium in every measure. Queen Serenity picked up the new magical focus and gazed into it's crystalline depths as tears began to pool and fall from her eyes.

The Queen soon began to speak in the language of her mother's court. _"I, Queen Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon, Lady Potter and hopeful dreamer, do hereby declare you to be the Scepter of Prissiness. May you serve my family and embarrass my husband for centuries to come." _

She would not open her bedchamber doors this evening, not even if those damned Juraians sent another Betrothal Contract. Tonight she would cry herself to sleep and dream of the happy reunion which was sure to come in the very near future.

An hour after her last tears fell and her breathing became deep and heavy two silent observers looked away from Serenity and towards each other.

_"I will miss these talks we have, young man." _The ghost of Queen Serenity the First came in from the balcony following the path of a Lunar cat which had gone to console her Sovereign some hours before.

_"Nonsense Queen Mummy. I'll still be a wizard when they do their thing on me. We can still have Silly Story Time with Cuteness together as we have done ever since my passing." _

Harry had grown very fond of the former ruler of the Silver Millennium. The apple really didn't fall far from the tree between Serenity the First and Serenity the Second. One day Harry would reunite with his own mother but until then Cuteness and Love needed him.

_"I am sad to say that my time has finally come, Harry. My daughter needed me so I stayed. My granddaughter needed me so I stayed..."_

_"I needed you."_

_"..and yet again I stayed long after my soul heard the call for eternal peace. I love you all terribly, but dear God boy you give a woman the fits with your bravery."_

Harry chuckled at his spectral mother-in-law's jab..

_"You'll give my love to Mum and Dad when you cross, then?"_

_"Silly boy, don't ask such questions yet! I'm not leaving until I've perved on Usagi giving you a proper homecoming at least once."_ He choked on that one. How does a ghost choke anyway?

Harry turned his gaze to the Earth which was perfectly framed in the balcony archway behind them. _"Don't you get enough of that watching King Endymion and his green haired Queen Hotness trawl through the major and minor alleys of the Earth looking for rare pleasures and kinky delights?"_

_"It's not the same. I want to watch you fill my daughter with seed enough for a little sister or brother for Cuteness to play with."_ The Queen's words caused Harry to choke again.

_"What? I thought that we weren't going to be able to have another. And what of Cuteness? Is her younger sister or brother or whatever going to get older than her, faster?"_

_"Well, they're going to zap you with the new and improved Scepter of Prissiness, aren't they?" _Harry gave off a spectral blush._ "You'll be healed up better than new. And as for Cuteness, well I think that once she has a sibling that and her having her own Scepter of Prissiness might give her that needed push to always be the older sister. If you want a more solid answer you could always go down to Crystal Tokyo and ask Setsuna."_

_"Not on your life... er death.. anyway, she's already made the fee known to us for that service. I am not about to do a wife swap just to see if Cuteness starts aging faster! However bad my old crush on Hotness was, I was just a kid then and I don't feel like sharing Usagi with her Ex!"_

_"Deep breaths, Mister Potter, deep breaths."_

_"Now if Hotness were alone in that payment... maybe a three way... think she'd be willing to negotiate?"_

A few seconds later, they both began howling with laughter. For just a moment in her very happy dreams, Serenity saw a vision of her mother Queen Serenity the First having a grand old time with her husband King 'Just' Harry, all framed by a full Earth in the night sky. 'I'm so glad, Mother. I'm so glad you like him.'

* * *

August 10th, 1996

Harry woke up to the noise of a non-magical Japanese household getting ready for school. This involved the general rushing about with occasional giggling and screeches from the younger girls. The smells and sounds of breakfast, while different from England, were still enough of a reminder of Privet Drive that he tried to roll deeper into the futon assigned to him last night. He was almost back asleep when a small pink haired projectile landed on top of him.

"Ossu! Hime-chan!" Cuteness rattled off in Japanese. One of the girls seemed to scold her lightly for the improper greeting from the other room. Probably Michiru, judging by the tone. The featherlight magical girl slid closer to his ear and whispered, "Good morning, Daddy. I love you very much."

She placed a kiss on his temple and ran into the next room.

Admit it Potter, that little girl _owns _you. "Have fun at school, Cuteness. Try not to battle the forces of evil on school grounds, Luv, headmasters tend to discourage that kind of thing."

She must have translated his response for the others if that four girl giggle fit was any indication. Soon enough, Haruka was revving her auto's engine outside to get the younger two off to their school before she and Michiru took a trip to the local college campus.

As the rest of the girls made for the front door to leave, Harry made for the shower to get cleaned up. After yesterday, he would need some time to let it all settle. Harry closed his eyes and let the warm water wash over his face as he did a brief recap of the last twenty-four hours. Yesterday, Harry had woken up in what could have been one of the most beautiful if least settled areas in the known world. Those mountains were bloody huge. Then he met Hotness. Merlin, that was only yesterday? Then... his first good shower since Privet Drive. While relaxing, the hot spring at Jusenkyo just wasn't the same. And after that was quality time with Hotness. Oh, there was the knuckle sandwich. He went through each detail of meeting dead Usagi's friends. Speaking of, please tell me that cold tingly feeling in the private bits region was not because of my dead friend. Harry chose to deny proof of spectral perving to finish his internal monologue.

Then there was Cuteness.

Oh, God. He's a Daddy.

Oh, Merlin. This was bigger than magic. Bigger than Voldemort. Why wasn't he running screaming back to England? Isn't that what teenage boys did when shown proof of Fatherhood?

Of course, when compared to enforced unwilling motherhood... Harry quickly banished that thought deep into the darkest corner of his mind.

Well, he's not a normal bloke now, is he? Cuteness was something he hadn't had since before his second birthday. She was family that loved him. She **loved** him. And after looking into her eyes just once, he loved her right back. Who else did he get that from? Not the Dursleys. Not the Headmaster. Not the Weasleys though that was close. Ginny and the fan-girls didn't really love him; that was hero worship. Hermione didn – wait... did she? Harry always called Ron his best mate, but Hermione was always closer. She never turned on him, did she? Even with the broom fiasco, she was working towards his best interests. Trust the girl to think beyond a boy's need to fly the awesomely wonderful mystery gift Firebolt. If it weren't for Cuteness and the implied future relationship with Usagi, this revelation would really make Harry treat Hermione altogether different then he had in the past. He could at least give her the attention she deserved for putting up with him since they were Ickle Firsties. Don't forget that he's already promised himself that he should be more friendly with Luna. Okay, Potter, sixth year was going to be the year of the Fairer Sex. Not the fan-girls of course just the first-name-only girls. Should be hard enough without widening the field, yeah? Right. He opened his eyes.

"Harry think Usagi pretty?" At least she was keeping her eyes up top this time.

"Yes Usagi. You are a pretty girl." She smiled. Yay.

"Harry like Chibi-usa?" Ah, Harry got it now. This shower was the first chance for Usagi to privately ask Harry how he felt about his new role as future husband and father since last night.

"Yes Usagi. She is adorable. Can I finish please?"

"Yes, please finish." She must not have understood. She didn't leave.

Harry tried again. "Usagi, please go."

She didn't respond with words. She just smiled, gave him a raspberry and proceeded to openly perv on him. Harry swore that as soon as she was alive, he'd pull her across his knee and spank her. Harry seemed to forget that shampooing his hair while fantasizing about spanking a sexy girl could accidentally give Usagi more of a show than she was getting before.

The Ghost of Marriage Future finally stopped perving on Harry when he started drying off. One of his hosts had been kind enough to leave a shirt and slacks outfit which was a bit snug but fit well enough. Harry wondered if it had been pulled from Haruka's wardrobe. She seemed the type to have some men's clothing in her wardrobe.

Harry went downstairs to find a place setting and a note on the dining room table. How sweet; Cuteness made his breakfast. Setsuna added a line under Cuteness's sugary sweet Happy-gram stating that they would be meeting together at about 1PM for a trip out to Tokyo Tower. She also commented that the 'Inner' Senshi, the four at the shrine, had invited him to a concert tomorrow night. After a delicious meal involving sushi roles with pink sugar crystals on top, Harry decided to look at the letters delivered by Dobby.

As expected, both girls were worried sick about him, Hermione assured Harry that the Headmaster would do everything possible to get him out of danger. She said that she didn't understand why Dumbledore wanted Harry to stay with Snape to the end of the summer but that she would try to talk him out of it. If Hermione's willing to argue against Dumbledore, then maybe she liked Harry more than he thought. She continued her letter with a full essay on what she had discovered on Eastern Magic and demanding that he learn as much of it as he can and tell her all about it when they get back together. Ginny had written about how much more horrible her summer was without Harry there to keep Hermione and Ron from tearing into each other on every little issue that came up. Ginny then went to great lengths to say how wonderful she and Dean Thomas were doing and how big the boy's feet were. Harry heard girls talk about foot size before but hadn't yet had anyone explain why foot size was important. Anyway, Ginny then unloaded a barrage of questions about the 'Eastern tarts', her words, that had taken him from his home. Just what the hell did Dumbledore tell everyone, anyway? Whatever, time to write back. Harry began to look around at the available stationery. He spotted some ink pens, personal letterhead and envelopes. The letterhead was clearly Eastern in design yet didn't have any name or address information that could be used against him. There was also a more traditional Japanese ink and brush set but Harry knew that wouldn't turn out well. He put down a sheet of paper and began his responses.

An hour and a half later, he was done. He had written a combined response to Hermione and to Ginny. He had also written a short thank-you note to Ron, a not so short thank-you to Neville and a thank-you to Luna that was marginally longer than his note to Hermione and Ginny. His first letter began with a short essay on why Harry could no longer trust the Headmaster. Dumbledore had as much as admitted that the Dursleys were his doing. He had been withholding the prophecy as well as any training that could be useful in battling Dark Lords. And for what? To keep Harry happy? Then why'd he have to go to the Dursleys? Those two acts were mutually exclusive, blood wards or no. Harry could rant on this topic for hours now, but that was enough for the girls. Then he dropped The Bomb.

Harry outlined the 'Mrs. Snape' plan. He then went on about how his Chinese Amazon friends had a good laugh after explaining why the plan couldn't possibly work. Harry chose to put a spin on Jusenkyo. He said it was a local variant of the animagus transformation and he wanted to save his 'form' for when they met again. Harry had been lucky of late, only getting splashed accidentally when it didn't matter so much. Still, Harry knew Murphy's Law. It was only a matter of time. Back to the letter. It was time to tweak the girls a bit. He mentioned that 'Red' was a martial artist of superb talent and ability. Red also received a similar 'animagus' ability just as Harry had. 'Blondie', as Harry described her, was a girl who was 'very close' to him. She followed him from China to Japan. He also mentioned that he was currently in Tokyo as a guest of some of those very same 'Mahou Shoujo' that Hermione lectured about.

Yes he's met Sailor Mars. All of them, in fact. Mars set Snape's hair on fire when Snivellus and the Headmaster tried to take Harry by force. He mentioned that Snape went down in twenty seconds and that the Headmaster was defeated in less than a minute. Harry didn't want to admit to taking the Headmaster's wand just yet though. Hermione was already going to be in shock from this letter without that kind of bragging. He asked Hermione and Ginny to spread the letter around to the twins and their friends before letting the Headmaster know that he had written back. He wouldn't ask Hermione to hide that he had written. She'd want to confront the man, he knew. Harry hoped that the Headmaster did not respond with Obliviate.

To Ron, he wrote a few lines of quiddich talk and told him to ask the girls for details. It was a lot to write down and his wrist was cramping.

To Neville, he didn't mention anything that he had been doing over the summer. Instead, he thanked Neville for going with him to the Department of Mysteries. He hoped that Ollivander would find Neville a good replacement for his Dad's broken wand. He also promised to spend more time revising together, as Hermione could go overboard and Ron was no help.

At first, Harry was going to cut back on what he wrote to Luna but then he thought better of it. If Harry really was to befriend her like Ginny and Hermione, then she needed to know just as much as they did. He thanked her for her help at the Department of Mysteries before diving into the same revelations and summer fun described in the first girls' letter. He did lighten up on the descriptions of local girls since there was no need to tease Luna on that subject. Upon closing the envelope to Luna, Harry spotted a tray of decorative stamps which had that distinct Japanese schoolgirl flair to them. All cats and cartoon characters and hearts and such. He added a couple of those stamps to the Hermione/Ginny letter and covered Luna's with them. It seemed appropriate. For all he knew, that Pokeman thing might be a snorkack. Now, how to deliver them...

"Dobby!"

POP

"The Great Harry Potter Sir calls for Dobby! Oh, yes! Tell Dobby what he can do for you Harry Potter Sir!"

Harry didn't flinch. He was used to the comings and goings of Dobby by now. "Thank you, Dobby. First, I have these letters that need delivering."

"Dobby will deliver letters for the Great Harry Potter Sir, yes he will!"

"Thank you. Also..." Harry stopped for a moment to collect his thoughts, "do you know where my school trunk is? How about my broom?"

"Yes, Mister Potter Sir. Professor Snapey has it all locked in his office at Hoggywarts."

Damn. There was no way Harry would allow Snape access to his father's cloak or the Marauder's Map. "Dobby. Can you get into Professor Snapey's office and get my things?"

POP

'But what about the letters? Was Dobby actually taking things out of-

POP

"Here are your things, Mister Harry Potter Sir!"

Dobby had come back and he had all of Harry's things with him already. "Brilliant, Dobby."

Dobby appeared to drool over the the thought of delivering letters, so Harry handed them over.

POP

Harry looked over his trunk. It didn't appear any more worn than last time he saw it at the Dursleys house. Snape could have done something to it though.

Harry cast Finite Incantatem, both with his wand and with the Headmaster's. Though he didn't know it, several hexes and tracking charms were peeled off by the wand he won off of Dumbledore. The same ones were too strong for Harry's phoenix feather core to take down. If Harry hadn't disarmed the Headmaster, he'd currently be suffering from curses meant to force him to eat his own fresh feces while suffering pain not unlike the cruciatus in strength. Then he would be obliviated of the attempt and compelled to try again.

After some minor repacking and moving important items around to his Hogwarts bookbag, he was sure he could go about town without looking like he had a purse. Thank Merlin. Soon after, he heard Haruka's auto approach. Once all the girls arrived, it would be time for him to play the tourist in Tokyo surrounded by the most beautiful girls he'd ever laid eyes on. Okay, sometimes it did not suck to be Harry Potter.

* * *

Ginny and Hermione didn't know what to do.

It was either late at night or early in the morning, Ginny couldn't tell in her drowsy state. Dobby had just POP'ed in and delivered a letter without staying long enough for her to ask about where he had actually gone. It looked like he had other letters to deliver. Ginny was halfway back to the land of Harry in Shining Armor and Ginny in Distress... and beds with silk rope and open showers and massage oils... when

SLAP

"Dammit, 'Mione! Harry was just about to do that Parseltongue thing on my... my... what the hell did you wake me for?"

Ginny looked over to Hermione, who had that stunned wizard-in-veela-thrall (2) look. The letter Dobby delivered was on the floor at Hermione's bare feet. How could a letter rattle Hermione that badly? Ginny picked it up and read it. Gods above, this is far worse than she ever imagined it would be. The whole Snape's Love Bunny thing was bad enough. Harry was spending time with 'naked-twirly-light-show' girls. This was horrible. Ginny needed Mum to teach her the family love potions _now_.

* * *

Tokyo Tower was brilliant! The view of the city was brilliant! The restaurants and museums and aquarium and the people... so many people. Harry had been into London a few times, but this was something entirely different. This was make-up time for the family vacations he'd missed in his 'youth'. Even better, Cuteness was almost always hand in hand with her da... her Daddy. It's like she was a patronus constantly sending him happy feelings by smiles and giggles and putting her hand in his and 'I wanna go here, Harry' and 'should we have the ice cream or the okonomiyaki, Harry?'.

Hotness had deferred on attending. She had some kind of research to do or something. On the plus side, Hotness had left Harry with a fat stack of large bills and no limits on spending. She was quick to point out that Harry could repay her, if he insisted, once he got access to the goblin bank again. So here Harry was being escorted through Tokyo Tower by his own entourage of hot and/or cute girls and he's paying for everything. Harry's patronus memory may have changed again.

Down in the aquariums, Harry told the girls about how his accidental magic once got him in trouble for letting a snake out of the zoo. They were equally impressed when this lead to him to admit to being a parseltongue. Rather than scare off the girls this just upped the tempo of conversations around him in Japanese that ended in two or three girls blushing and giggling.

The highlight of the tour was the Special Observatory. Harry paid out the required extra money to get to the two hundred and fifty meter high level. The description said that at this height, if you dropped something, it would take seven seconds to reach the street below. That's why the observatory was all glassed in for safety. Harry and the girls were all spreading out around the glass walled circular observation deck when Rei noticed that Chibi-usa had finally let go of Harry and was more than just a meter away from him.

Why was Cuteness giving him some space? Actually, she was allowing the invisible-to-most Usagi to have a few minutes alone with Harry. It was Date Time.

Usagi put her spectral hand on his. Rather than snub her and move away, he looked at their hands together, smirked a cute little smirk at Usagi and left his hand where it was.

Other people, though, couldn't leave things as they were...

"_Chibi-usa?"_

The girl in question started. She hadn't expected Rei to sneak up on her. "_..."_

The shrine priestess would have none of that._ "Chibi-usa."_

Chibi-Usa replied warily. "_Oh. Yes, Rei?"_

"_Where is she?" _Rei called out sweetly.

The little pink haired girl chose to play dumb. "_I don't know what you mean..."_

But Rei wasn't taking 'no' for an answer. "_Yes you do. Usagi. I know how you act around your 'mother' and this isn't it. Harry may be something to you, but he's not Usagi. Yesterday I saw her. Last night I think you and Harry saw her. Where. Is. She?" _

Rei had put her hands on the guardrail to either side of Cuteness. Were it not for the uncomfortable squirm Cuteness was beginning to do, nobody would suspect Rei was being anything but friendly to the smaller girl.

Cuteness really didn't want to answer these questions. She hadn't been with her Daddy long enough for the other girls to learn who he really was yet. Mommy couldn't reach out to the other girls and wouldn't know the right things to say even if she could. They'd wonder about Mamoru and how he got bumped out of the prime Daddy spot. Without Usagi around to answer the questions after she herself learns the right answers, they might think Harry's tricking people. Cuteness didn't answer the questions. She couldn't answer the questions.

The little pinkette hopped up onto the guardrail, kicked her legs back and forth and started looking for Harry.

Rei tried again. "_Please, Chibi-usa, tell me where our Princess is. I need to know. She's been gone so long, she's... I just need a chance to talk to Usagi. Please Chibi-usa..."_

Rei kept sliding closer and as she did Cuteness felt more and more uncomfortable. She couldn't help Rei like this. Not even if she wanted to. All she could do was keep her mouth shut and hope Daddy saw her. If only the glass at her back would just go away so she could get away from Rei.

Harry was glad that he let Usagi try to hold his hand. Really, what could it hurt? She would slowly say something in her best English. He would try to answer her without looking like a schizophrenic mental patient to everyone else. It was actually going rather well until Usagi's last line.

"What Rei doing Chibi-usa?"

Harry noticed where Usagi was looking and followed her gaze. Rei was really close to Cuteness and the pink haired angel looked really unhappy to be so close to the miko. The need to intervene quickly overtook Harry and he was moving before anyone noticed.

Harry got within arms reach of Rei when _it _happened.

Harry's anecdote of accidental magic was about to do more harm than good. As soon as Cuteness began to wish away the glass, she experienced a burst of accidental magic and the pane vanished. Cuteness rolled back into open air and fifty kilometer per hour cross-winds. By the time she started screaming, she was already too far down for Rei to hear it.

"NO!" Harry pushed Rei over and jumped out the open panel after his falling daughter.

There would be no panicking. Cuteness needed her Daddy. She would die without him.

Harry whipped his new wand out and bellowed, "ACCIO DAUGHTER!"

This did have the effect of pulling the shrieking girl back up to his level but they were still dropping like stones. With his legs wrapped around Cuteness, he pushed his hand into his bookbag and yanked out a miniature broom.

"Finite!"

Instant full scale Firebolt. With three seconds left until splat, He put Cuteness between him and the broom and dug his heels in. Hard.

As soon as the Special Observation deck lost pressure, alarms sounded. Much as Japan's government would like to claim otherwise, Tokyo Tower attracted the magical and martial heavy hitters like no other landmark in the whole island nation. Tokyo Metropolitan Police had quick response units constantly ready and waiting to restore order or peel victims off the street or both depending on the situation. By the time Harry was pulling his broom out of his bookbag, a half dozen video cameras were tracking his fall. As at least a few of the ground level crowd were almost always looking up, word spread really quickly that two people somehow fell out of the highest observatory and were on a death plunge.

His move was not as graceful as a Wrongsky Feint, but it worked. Harry had switched from going down very fast to going level very fast at waist height through the crowd on the street. Legs and waists blurred by Harry and his screaming passenger as he tried desperately to kill off all momentum.

Well, he did find a way, but not the way he was looking for.

They hit a food vendor. Cuteness got a face full of fried octopus balls. Harry got a face full of iced coffee. Once the little birdies disappeared and Harry could shake off the cobwebs she noticed that she was a girl and that they had a crowd. Harry pulled Cuteness to her feet after picking up her dropped wand and broom. Cuteness seemed to be in shock. For all she knew, Harry might be in shock too. Still, witches and magical girls do not need this kind of attention.

Harry began to focus her fuzzy mind on the only escape method she could think of outside of questionable broom rides with an unconscious passenger and a concussed pilot. Harry had no idea how long she would remain conscious herself. She didn't want to fall short of her goal only to come to in a hospital wandless with an armed guard.

Police slowly came closer to the two girls who had fallen out of the tower and hit a food vendor. The older one got up and seemed to recover some. While it wasn't a story that got a lot of attention, the police still recognized Usagi Tsukino when they saw her. Before they could get aid to the missing and presumed dead girl, she picked up her... broom... and her companion and

-pop-

Harry dual apparated herself and her daughter to Chibi-usa's bedroom at the Outer's house. She then slowly looked over her daughter. Dirty, yes. Mental, yes. Healthy, yes. Thank God.

Harry picked her wand up from the bed and cast a messenger patronus. Handy charm, that one. Minako would hear that Harry and Chibi-usa were safe at her house three seconds later. This narrowly avoided having the panicky Senshi transform in public to look for two of their own. They all began moving to the tower's exits hoping to get back to Harry and Chibi-usa to make sure everything was alright.

Harry removed their shoes and dropped his bookbag but ignored the rest of their clothes before joining Cuteness on the bed and cuddling in a shock induced daze. A little over an hour later the other girls entered bedroom to check up on their two princesses. By then, both father and daughter were asleep.

Usagi had been watching them closely the whole time. She followed Harry out the window then tracked her future daughter and husband down the full length of the tower and right into the fried octopus ball vendor. Harry didn't shake her with the apparition either. Unable to do anything else in her spectral form, Usagi stayed in the bedroom and looked longingly at her fragile family.

End Chapter

Chapter Notes:

(1) Author Enterprise1701-d has a story named 'Mahou mo Ken' which does not have Senshi but does have a class of battle magic called 'Japanese Artillery Magic'. The idea is that this spell class is capable of high levels of damage over wide areas BUT the class weakness is long incantations. There is more to it than that but Artillery Magic seemed like an interesting evolutionary step between Avatar/Senshi type magic and Potter-esque Witchcraft and Wizardry.

(2) This is my best guess at what the wizarding equivalent of 'deer-in-headlights' would be.

**End Chapter**

REV 08/2012


	10. Heather Snape, Japan Loves You

**Chapter Ten: Heather Snape, Japan Loves You**

August 10th, 1996

Mamoru Chiba was reading an advanced economics text over tea. Tea with two curvy Russian exchange students to be exact. Tutoring was really getting the magical warrior a lot of international experience both in and out of the bedroom. His experience was leading him to evening's best possible end game scenario when the news broadcast filtering through the street level cafe caught his attention.

"_... and presumed dead only to be seen at Tokyo Tower just minutes ago. Miss Tsukino disappeared du__r__ing a school trip with no witnesses and no clues earlier this year. She was spotted today after she fell through a breach in the Special__ Observatory glazing. Another girl who has not yet been identified fell with her..."_

Mamoru was beginning to think that he'd seen the last of Sailor Moon. He knew that they both had powers and responsibilities but the age difference and her focus on their future marriage was really weighing him down. He humored her for a while, even tried to let things happen as she wanted but there were just too many obstacles in the way of her Happily Ever After. They were actually experiencing one of the 'off again' parts of their 'on again off again' relationship when she disappeared and as sad as it was for the girl to disappear that didn't change the facts. All it did was give him a chance to focus on women in a more acceptable age and experience bracket. And now this...

Mamoru knew that the video footage showed Usagi and the girl who claimed to be his daughter getting up off of the ground after a two hundred and fifty meter drop. When did Usagi start to wear glasses? Was that a wand and a broom? He knew the lithe girl was a magical powerhouse but he also knew she didn't use _that _kind of magic. He resigned himself to paying a visit to the local Magical Girl Union Headquarters, a.k.a. the Hikawa Shrine.

Later.

He had Russian girls to bed tonight. He could go chat up his favorite miko tomorrow.

* * *

A tense group of magical girls hovered at the bottom of the stairs. After an awkward moment or two Ami made the first move to climb the stairs and look for their missing friends. Ami knew that the two girls made it into Chibi-usa's room after doing a discrete scan of the city with the Mercury Computer after the radio report they heard leaving Tokyo Tower mentioned two girls had disappeared into thin air. Harry had obviously used teleportation to escape the authorities.

This was both good and bad. Harry saved Chibi-usa's life, that was clear. Unfortunately, there would be a price to pay for that now. Harry may have been able to go around in Usagi's form without drawing much attention before. She wasn't advertising her presence. Now however, everyone was looking for Usagi Tsukino, the 'Japanese witch'. They were also looking for a pink haired little girl traveling with Teen Witch or Moon Rider or one of any number of new titles that the Boy-Who-Lived was collecting from the mahou shoujo obsessed media of Japan.

By population, she was now much more famous in Japan than 'he' was in the Wizarding World.

Minako and the others could make jokes about this later. First, were Harry and Chibi-usa okay?

Usagi backed into the corner above her daughter's bed to keep out of the way as the room quietly filled with her close friends. What they saw was very sweet. Even asleep as they were, Harry and Chibi-usa held on to each other like nothing else mattered. Their dirty, food covered bodies were the only mark against them. You didn't put your shoes on the bedroom floor and fall asleep covered in grime, coffee and fried seafood. They were in Japan, not West Virginia.

"_So, do we wait for them to wake up?" _Makoto asked the question.

Minako responded. "_Ami, get your Mercury Computer out and see if Saturn needs to heal anything."_

A three minute scan came up clean. They went back downstairs.

"_So, what happened?" _Hotaru was done waiting.

"_Ask Rei, she was closest." _Haruka had seen Rei getting close to their Mini-Moon before the glass disappeared.

"_I don't know why she fell any better than you." _Rei hissed. Even pressuring the pink haired little girl like she was, she had no idea how the glazing disappeared. _"I was asking her questions when it happened. T__here's more to Harry then Pluto's let out. After seeing those two together yesterday, well, Chibi-usa must know more than she lets on."_

"_That's old news, Rei. She's from the __**future**__. She can't tell everything she knows, now, can she?"_Minako was done with this subject, even if Rei wasn't. "There's no sense in beating a dead gift horse in the mouth. Let's go home."

As they left, Ami had to hand over five hundred yen to Makoto. Minako just couldn't get through a single day without mangling old sayings.

Harry and Cuteness slept for another hour before they were prodded awake for baths and dinner. As the Inners had gone home for the evening, Sunday morning would be spent back the shrine getting to one each other some more. First on the list? Magical home movies via Harry's pensieve.

* * *

Headmaster Dumbledore stepped around his desk, fell into his chair and closed his eyes for the first time in twenty-four hours. It was just approaching lunchtime but he had not the strength to head down to the Great Hall. Castle elves would have to bring him something. As he released a deep breath, the enchanted chair worked tension out of his muscles and revitalized him. Getting back to his desk meant for that the first time in a full day he had a wand that worked well. Sure, he hadn't so much as lifted it since he took the Elder Wand from Grindelwald in the Forties but it was the wand Ollivander sold Albus when he was eleven back when muggles thought that man would never achieve flight. He tested the wand by levitating his various Potter tracking instruments onto his desk from the shelves.

It was… not difficult but considerably less easily done. Most unfortunate.

It was far more difficult and took far longer than the same action would with his... with Potter's Elder Wand. Albus would have to make getting that wand back his highest priority when next Mister Potter deigned to set foot on English soil. If Harry realized that he currently possessed one of the Deathly Hallows he may try to retake his cloak from Snape's possession thereby claiming two of them. Luckily, almost no one actually believed in the tale let alone knew where the real Hallows were. Albus would look into Harry's things the minute Harry steps into English influence again and make sure that there wasn't anything in his trunk that could give the boy anymore opportunities to escape his destiny.

Ablus masked his original wand to look like the one Harry took. Mustn't allow anyone to see a difference in his magical abilities or his reduced abilities may be discovered by Tom. The Headmaster also asked Poppy to alert him when Severus regained consciousness. Severus had to be obliviated of the whole Japan trip. Even allowing his Potions Master to remember what happened long enough to tell Voldemort could violate his vows. Besides, the man had enough reasons to take a firm hand to the boy and being beaten soundly by school aged girls as Mister Potter watched was not likely to help the situation. The Headmaster briefly considered the possibility that these girls and their unorthodox ways may be 'the power the Dark Lord knows not'.

But no, these 'Senshi' could not proxy for Harry in this war. They would not beat Tom in Harry's name. Why, it was ludicrous to think they could. They may have surprised Albus in Tokyo but then he was pulling his punches so to speak. Tom would do no such thing. If Miss Granger could identify the girls with a few borrowed books, surely Tom already knew of them and knew how best to nullify their talents.

No, the prophesied power could be none other than manly love and resulting childbirth. Tom Riddle would never willingly submit to another and _encouraging_ young Harry to tread that path would both give the boy a power Tom didn't understand and it would put Harry in the proper mindset to leave this world willingly when it was time for the horcrux in his head to be dealt with.

Voluntary submission to another. Love. Self sacrifice. These were not things Tom Riddle could understand nor could he counter their proper application.

The plan was perfect.

* * *

Voldemort was not pleased. Two of his lesser followers learned of this in excruciatingly painful detail over the course of several hours as Severus Snape continued to defy his summons. The pain pouring through Snape's Dark Mark should be unbearable by now.

* * *

The sleeping draught and other potions which Madam Pomfrey used to start Severus Snape on the road to recovery were stronger than usual on account of his injuries. Perhaps if the Headmaster had stopped off at any number of magical hospitals or healing stations along their portkey journey, Snape may have fully recovered by now. Instead, Albus brought his 'sleeping' friend along with him through the entire journey without more than the most basic aide. A couple of potions in the Potions Master's bag appeared to be his personal variants on healing draughts so the Headmaster saw no reason not to dose Severus with those while he was traveling.

The foot must have been getting worse for the unconscious man to react so poorly to his own medicinal potions.

Inside the potioned and tormented mind of Severus Snape, horrible things were happening. He was both too hot and too cold. His skin felt like rusty nails were being drawn over a terrible sunburn in the most sensitive of places. A constant feeling of inadequacy flooded his mind. These were the effects of the potions Albus had given him. Severus brewed that stock to look like healing potions for dosing the Brat before... but that didn't happen. On top of those rather dark potion effects were the poorly treated injuries sustained in twenty seconds of the most humiliating combat of Snape's entire dueling career. Then there was the Dark Mark. Imagine having testicles grafted onto one's arm; when Voldemort was displeased, the Dark Mark would feel as if those testicles were being squeezed more and more tightly over time without bursting. Snape could not escape from any of those feelings and would continue to suffer for hours yet.

* * *

Ranma Saotome thought that taking a ship back across the Sea of Japan might make him soft. After all, he and his old man swam across the first time he ever made the trip.

Stupid sharks.

Fun? No. Good training? Yes.

Ranma thought that staying in a passenger cabin would limit the number of exercises and kata he could perform. How much running and kicking and punching could you do in a space that was barely two meters wide by three meters deep? He thought that the lack of activity above and below decks may actually cause him to lose his edge.

Luckily, Shampoo had a plan. As soon as he made it into the cabin and began complaining about how boring and unproductive this trip would be, she smiled and laid out her training program. A challenge. Shampoo knew of a high end ki-burning Amazon practice Ranma had never been shown before and had not thought to pursue on his own. She claimed that she could beat him the first time, even if he learned fast enough to draw or win the second time. The stakes: winner has absolute 'training' authority for the full ocean voyage.

True to form, Ranma agreed to the challenge without any other explanation.

Shampoo pulled out a bottle of water. Best to show girl-Ranma first as that's how Shampoo learned it with her warrior sisters. Shampoo also promised they could try the training with his male form after his initial lessons.

This all made sense to Ranma.

Now for the rules of the training. Dominate your opponent without offensive or crippling strikes of any kind. Grappling was allowed with the exception of pain and choke holds. Both challengers must maintain physical contact with their opponents at all times. Victory was by submission or knockout. In reverence to their most ancient Amazon traditions, both challengers must compete in the nude. Shampoo laid out the allowable tools: oils and lotions. Ranma's eyes got wide at hearing the last rule to the competition he'd already agreed to. His eyes glazed over when the training tools were revealed.

The days and nights Ranma and Shampoo spent training within the bowels of the tramp steamer traveling from their undisclosed Chinese port to Japan were indeed some of the most intense and powerful physical and ki burning workouts that the aquatransexual had ever experienced. The other passengers and crew left that section of the ship alone. Strange lights, stranger moaning noises, shrieks and shaking bulkheads were the most disturbing signs of spectral activity that most of those people had ever experienced.

Long before landfall, hot water was applied and skills were modified and refined in order to achieve mastery of Ranma's new favorite 'combat' style.

* * *

August 11th, 1996

Today, Harry was going to put his new wand through its paces. To begin with, he turned the new wand on his old one and looked for charms, tracers, hexes and curses. Though he couldn't determine the exact nature of them, he did find a few.

"Finite incantatem."

One left. Harry dug deep and recalled another unlocking charm Hermione had pulled out of thin air during the DA research periods they had last year. On the next pass, his phoenix feather core wand was clean. He then cast a few charms with it just to prove that he hadn't messed up its magical output. Nope, it felt fine.

The first thing he did when he saw the girls getting ready to go was cast a hair switching charm between Haruka and Cuteness for the trip to Rei's shrine. Haruka wasn't entirely happy with the change at first but she did put up with it for Cuteness's sake. As the minutes passed by, the faux pinkette began to think that keeping her new uber-girly hair color would be a great way to prank anyone who knew her and knew of her tastes. Feeling left out of the fun, Hotaru and Michiru had their hair switched next. Harry's mistake was in saying that he could do eye color too. That was what set them back half an hour.

When the Outers plus Chibi and Harry entered the shrine, the Inners saw magical makeovers and went wild. Minako loudly declared that she'd help him 'relax' later if she could get a short, light blue hair cut with red eyes. She held up an anime poster of the look in question. Shocked, he automatically agreed to it. Ami shuffled over to his side and whispered her request. Blushing hard, Harry said that she could have Usagi's hair and his eyes, but that he really wouldn't request payment for the makeovers. True, her offer of payment was less risque than Minako's but it was far more than Ami had ever offered anyone else before.

Makoto spent the next few hours as a Minako clone while Rei wanted nothing more than to play around with Harry's kanzashi. Several other girls who had forgotten about his magic hair sticks swore for the lost opportunity. Harry and Cuteness both noticed that Usagi could not stop laughing at her friends' fashion games.

"_I believe that we have taken enough of Mister Potter's salon time, ladies. _Let's get down to business, shall we?" Hotness has entered the building.

Minako fired back at Setsuna, _"Wouldn't you like Harry to pull out his wand and shoot his magic all over your face and hair? He's really good at it!"_

Setsuna smirked at Harry. Some of the other girls began to catch on.

"I do believe Mister Potter will have his hands full with you and Ami tonight, Mina. I'm sorry Harry, you'll have to do me another night." Harry choked on her words.

His imagination ran overdrive trying to figure out Minako's very important line he'd just missed. Wait, him and Hotness? Ack...

In time honored tradition, Harry began to beat the dirty images and words out of his head by way of the closest available firm surface. A table.

_Thump_

_Thump_

_Thump_

_Crack_

"Reparo."

Harry found his self control and wiped the blood off of his head. He noticed all of the girls were either worried for him like Makoto or trying desperately to hold back laughter like Haruka.

"Right, business. I'll just get the pensive out then."

Just as before in China, Harry gave the girls a basic tour of Hogwarts Castle while giving them a broad survey of the Wizarding World. They were quite shocked to see ghosts. Rei wondered if he'd let them see Usagi. Oh. My. God. There's, like, no television anywhere. And no phones? Even worse. How do these girls do it? And those cloaks are the worst fashion disasters anywhere! Oh! Magic fight! Twenty points from Gryffindor of course. And back outside.

Rather than go right to the Department of Mysteries, Harry began loading the pensive with his standard Big Fight and Monster scenes in chronological order. As his audience was teenaged girls he put fun scenes in between each fight. For those scenes, he used Quidditch (Harry wins), Diagon Alley, Hogsmead and the Yule Ball (but without the angry bits). He did have the fight with Herb in there but chose not to include Tokyo Tower. If they were lucky, Harry's magical home movies would be done in time for lunch.

At quarter past noon, a very shocked and awed group of girls plus one boy came out of the pensive. They had heard some of it before, of course, but... wow.

Even as heavily laden with magic as their lives were none of them expected anything close to what they were shown. While he got big points for saving Chibi-usa the day before, the girls now knew that Harry was always like that. Harry had just been re-classified by several girls as Grade A Senshi Boyfriend Material. And as far as they could tell, he was single.

"_Excuse me, am I interrupting something?" _

Enter, stage left, the only other Grade A Senshi Boyfriend Material known to the assembled magical girls, Mamoru Chiba. Two young men stared at each other, each sizing the other up. Harry rose from his seat and offered the newcomer his hand.

"Good afternoon. I'm Harry Potter." After a moment, Mamoru took the hand and shook it, never looking away from Harry's eyes. A new Witch Usagi and a new guy in the Estrogen Zone? Coming here today was the right thing to do.

"Mamoru Chiba, pleased to meet you." Mamoru returned.

Diplomacy never hurt. With his future, he needed all the practice he could get. Setsuna set the meeting in motion with her own greeting. "_Welcome back, Mamoru. Tea?" _

He nodded and Makoto jumped up to grab a drink tray sitting nearby.

_"I trust you heard about Tokyo Tower?" _Setsuna added.

"_Yes, thank you. I did. All the news channels were showing video footage yesterday. It's not every day that one see's his dead ex-girlfriend save his daughter by flying on a broom." _Chiba noticed several girls flinch. Minako had covered her mouth and her eyes went wide. In his distracted state, he missed picking up the cup of hot tea, knocking over a soda next to it instead. Harry caught the spill on his side. Correction, her side.

"_Damn! The old saying's right! Why are all the good ones married or gay?!" _As Minako raged against the unfairness of the world Mamoru stepped back from the boy turned girl. An immature brat was bad enough, there was no way he was marrying another guy.

"Bugger that! You'll not be getting me preggers!" Harry growled out.

Harry had just gotten a translation from Ami, who added that Usagi was 'destined' to marry Mamoru and... well... Harry was Usagi.

"That's three blokes in two weeks that wanted me in the pudding club, and.. and one of them didn't care that I wasn't a girl right then!" She huffed.

Harry may not usually think like a girl but he got the righteous indignation down perfectly.

The world was about to end. Setsuna was laughing. She was laughing so hard that tears were pouring out.

The dam broke. Soon all the girls were laughing save Harry. She didn't think it was funny at all. Neither did Mamoru for that matter.

As the girls giggled in the background, Mamoru watched the dead girl dip her fingers into his tea and turn back into a boy. He then watched as Mister Potter drew a wand and used magic to clean up the mess.

"Setsuna, when your done rolling on the floor and showing us your knickers, would you care to explain what is going on before someone tries to have sex with me who shouldn't?"

Mamoru lost color in his face when Harry mentioned that. No, this was one sacrifice he was not willing to make for Crystal Tokyo. Having a relationship with Usagi had been hard enough before this. Chibi-usa was just going to have to find another Daddy if Mister Potter was her Mommy.

"Fine." Setsuna would rather continue laughing, as it was something she rarely got to do. However, the chaos that staying quiet now would generate would not be good for Crystal Tokyo. She collected herself and prepared to fix it.

"_Well, first let me assure you that Harry and Mamoru will not be required to do anything they might consider unpleasant for this young lady here to still exist." _She smiled at Cuteness who smiled back._"We can explain now because any concerns I may have had with Mister Potter's new role in the future were erased when he jumped out of Tokyo Tower to save out littlest princess." _With that, Cuteness jumped up off the floor and once again hugged her Daddy tight while beginning to interpret for him. _"While Mister Chiba may have missed Harry's magical home movies this morning, now would be a good time to bring up one or two things that I saw in them."_

"_You mean Usagi." _Rei had interrupted. It would have been the first thing brought up until Mamoru announced himself.

Setsuna continued. "_Yes. You may recall that just as Harry was blacking out at Jusenkyo, a spirit rose up behind her." _

Harry hadn't expected to see that. He was told about the end of the fight by Ranma but didn't realize that Usagi would show up in his memory. Usagi floated up to Harry and Cuteness as Setsuna spoke.

_"While falling into the pool gave Harry the body of Usagi Tsukino, that fight is what set her spirit free. _Harry, can you tell us how the Jusenkyo fight ended?"

After Cuteness finished translating for Harry, Usagi made a suggestion to Cuteness who whispered it into Harry's ear. Maybe Usagi could tell them herself.

Everyone else was plenty confused when Harry looked into empty air and nodded. Rei's eyes widened. Usagi was _here_! Harry pulled out his wand again and converted one of the sodas into ice water. As soon as the sex change was complete, a golden crescent moon flared on the blonde's forehead. Her expression and posture shifted from into something far more familiar than a female Harry Potter could provide, something none of the others had seen in almost a year.

"_I took over from Harry, transformed into Sailor Moon and totally kicked that guy's ass, that's what happened!" _Usagi was about to make a public spectacle of dumping her old flame when the girl hugging her waist squeaked out.

"_Momma?" _Explanations had to wait as Mother and Daughter soaked each other with tears. Other girls joined the crying jag until just Setsuna and Mamoru were left waiting for the others to calm down.

* * *

"Oh, dear. This is sure to cause trouble." Arthur Weasley was reading the morning's Daily Prophet. On the front cover of England's biggest magical paper was a picture of yesterday's scene at Tokyo Tower, a picture that covered half of the page. Japan's Teen Witch was exposed. The picture was taken right before Harry had apparated out, so the wand and broom were on full public display. Luckily for the subject of the photo, the wand was not in sharp focus so no-one would be able to identify it by sight. Arthur was sure he'd seen glasses like those before, though. And that was a Firebolt alright. None could deny that. This was no hoax.

While Arthur set the paper down muttering about how impossible it would be to obliviate all of Japan, Hermione saw the picture on the cover and froze up. 'That was Blondie! How irresponsible, using magic for all to see! And where did she get a Firebolt? Those brooms are still quite rare, even in Britain.'

Hermione grabbed Ginny's arm as she walked by and pointed at Blondie's photo while Hermione continued to read the cover story. Ginny went white. Ginny knew that wasn't just any Firebolt.

"How the bloody hell did that bitch get Harry's Firebolt?!" Ginny shrieked.

Molly stormed through the kitchen and twisted Ginny's ear as is any overbearing mother's right.

"Language! Young Lady, you do not say such things in this house!" Molly stopped shouting but she held the steel in her voice. "Now, what's this about Harry's broom?"

"I think Ginny may be right, Mrs. Weasley." Hermione spoke up. "Firebolts are rare enough here in England and Europe that knowing a witch used one near where Harry is makes him suspect."

The Bookworm of Gryffindor Tower looked closely at a familiar looking pair of glasses in the photo.

"This could be bad. Japan has been ignoring I.C.W. Rulings since the Nineteen fifties. The mahou shoujo are just one of the many classes of violations that occur in Japan everyday. The only reason that other Muggles don't catch on is that the relatively high technological advancements in Japan make magic easy to explain away or deny." Hermione had to stop to take a breath. "Even if the locals don't do anything, our own Ministry may try to pin it on Harry when he gets back if it can be proven that she used his broom."

* * *

Albus Dumbledore forced his way into Snape's quarters. Not that it was difficult for the Headmaster to open any door in Hogwarts castle but he was not in a mood to wait.

Empty. Harry's things weren't here.

Damn, the boy had two of the Deathly Hallows now. Even if Harry never learned what they were this meant that Dumbledore just lost two Hallows as he was near to finding the third.

When the Headmaster first gazed over today's Daily Prophet, he recognized the witch immediately from Fawkes' trip abroad. He also recognized the broom. If only he hadn't sworn that accursed oath. He couldn't even hint about Harry having a role in this secrecy breach so long as the oath was in effect. Plans would have to be made which could be carried out the moment the boy returned.

As noble as saving a little girl is the Headmaster would bury Harry for this in the Wizengamot and the Ministry. Albus would be declared Harry's rightful guardian when they saw how careless the boy was with his possessions. Then Harry would be forced to sign the Betrothal Contract with Severus and he would hand over the Elder Wand and the Cloak. This would all be over soon enough.

Once Albus Dumbledore had his local fires put out he could return to the matter of Mahou Shoujo. Such power could no longer be allowed to run unchecked, even on the other side of the planet. They would be brought to heel.

* * *

After the unscheduled love fest, Usagi Tsukino was able to pull herself together to address the big questions.

"_Okay. -snif- Okay. -snif- Okay, everbody." _She looked around. _"First, -snif- I can't just kick Harry out of his own body forever." _Usagi saw Haruka's face. _"Stop it. Really, this is just a short term thing. -hick- I kind of like Harry now and it would be an awful shame if he up and died before Ami paid for her makeover." _

Ami blushed while a couple of girls giggled in the background. Usagi continued.

"_Anyway. -snif- I'm borrowing Harry here for a few minutes so that we can sort this mess out. Wonderful as the boy is, I don't think you'll just take his word for it if he tried to explain things. You see, the future went and changed on us." _

There was an instant uproar. Mamoru and the girls who weren't in on the meeting at the Gates all asked the same things. How? What changed? What about Crystal Tokyo? If the future changed, then why is Chibi-usa still here?

"_Everybody, please." _The questions stopped. _"Setsuna, feel free to step in if I get something wrong, but I don't think it's that hard to understand." _

Setsuna nodded for Usagi to continue on. _"The thing Harry and I have in common is Jusenkyo. So I'm guessing that that's where this... different future started." _

Usagi looked to Setsuna who didn't move to correct her.

"_Well, Mamoru and I were at a low point in or relationship right before I... left... and I'm guessing that you were just about ready to call it off yet again, huh?" _

Mamoru nodded.

_"Well don't feel bad about it. Fate's rewritten my personal fairy tale on us. Mamoru, if you hadn't already gotten yourself another girlfriend, well go ahead and do it. I found a new Daddy for my daughter." _

Absolute silence. The wide eyed stares said a lot. Usagi turned to her daughter.

_"So... you now speak English, you see ghosts like your Daddy can and you can do his magic too..." _

Nod. Eyes kept opening wider.

_"Did your name change?" _

Nod.

_"Well, don't keep everybody waiting Sweetie. What's your name?"_

Everyone looked at the temporaly displaced immortal youth. She started playing with her faux blonde Haruka-hair.

_"Good afternoon. I am Princess Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter of the Royal House of the Moon and of the Ancient and Noble House of Potter." _She had curtseyed during her introduction. _"Guess you could say I take after Mommy enough in looks that you couldn't tell when the change hit."_

"_So Harry's off the market? Damn. You gotta give us a chance before you sink your claws in one, Princess." _Makoto mock pouted. Usagi smirked.

"_Well, it's open season on Tuxedo Mask.." _She winked at Mamoru. He gulped and took a step back._"..and I don't exactly have a pulse just yet.. sooooooo. Mina? Ami? I'll give you all until Harry leaves for England to pay off your 'tabs'." _

Both girls blushed, but Minako's blush framed a wicked smirk. Usagi continued.

_"I have no doubt doubt Harry will finish the job and bring me back proper sometime. Sooner rather than later I hope. Anyway, when he does, I intend to thank him as any rescued Princess would. In bed. Naked." _

Mamoru really didn't need to hear that. He started looking for a good time to leave.

"_Usagi." _Rei murmured.

The Moon Princess had been talking to her friends in smaller groups for about half an hour or so. When things degenerated into a more normal Senshi meeting, Mamoru had taken then opportunity to slip away. Now with the others distracted, Rei could finally get some one one one time with her Princess.

_"Let's talk some where private." _Typical Rei, the miko began to walk down a side hall before Usagi even agreed. Usagi followed just the same.

_SLAP_

Usagi held her cheek as Rei's emotions built to a fever pitch.

_"What were you thinking in front of the shrine the other day? Can you tell me?" _But Rei didn't really want answers._"I had to hear second hand that you disappear one day and they never find you and your gone for months, Usagi. Months where we didn't know where you were. Chibi-usa was a wreck but she stayed here anyway - I don't know why. We were all wrecks. And then... and then Pluto tells us that you're com__ing back but you're not? And I see you as a ghost? Really.. I.. I just..." _Rei was tearing up early in her rant. By this time there were long lines of tears fallin down both cheeks.

"_I love you too, Rei." _Usagi smiled at her closest friend. _"I'm sorry for scaring the shit out of everyone. I'm sorry for hurting you." _

She pulled a shaking Rei into a tight hug and began to whisper in Rei's ear.

_"I watched you in class before following you home, you know. I just had to touch you. And when I did, I almost felt alive for a moment." _Usagi backed off enough to look Rei in the eyes. _"After not feeling anything for so long, even your slap felt good." _

She winked at the miko and gave her a peck on the cheek.

Usagi moved to step away, but Rei held on. _"Usagi, if Harry can still play the field for a few days, what about you?"_

"_I'm sorry Rei, I don't understand." _Usagi thought she did understand but she wanted Rei to admit her own feelings.

Rei chose to answer with actions rather than words. After slapping her Princess around so often in the past, Rei finally did what she had always wanted to do. She kissed Usagi and really poured her heart into it. A minute later, the girls separated.

"_We should get back before they come looking for us." _The sound of several voyeurs running way could be heard through the rice paper screen door.

"_I suppose our secret is out now." _Usagi said with a smile.

"_Our secret? I thought this was my secret." _Rei felt better; her anger was just slipping away.

"_Trust me, Rei. If Luna and Pluto hadn't made me believe that I'd get my Prince Charming without even working for it, I'd have pinned you to the floor a long time ago." _Usagi had a big grin now.

Rei took the bait. "_Well, my Princess. You rent that body off of Harry just one more time before he goes back to England and we'll just see who's on top of whom in the end." _

She dove in for one last kiss before both girls walked into the meeting room to face the music.

"_Do you and Rei have anything to tell us, Usagi?" _Makoto was waiting for an answer.

Looking around at the sea of eager faces, Usagi settled on her best option. Her golden moon flickered and then died. The better part of valour was discretion, or so Shakespeare and Miss Tsukino would both have you believe.

"So, what did I miss?" Harry looked around. That Mamoru guy and Hotness were both missing. She was standing next to Rei, who was looking back at her with something akin to betrayal on her face. "What did she do, then?"

"She told me and Ami that we could have you until you left Japan and then she went and kissed Rei. I had no idea our Princess was such a kinky girl." Minako sounded hopeful. Harry didn't know what to think.

A few minutes later, Harry was snapped out of his daze when he noticed that Minako had taken to alternately splashing him with hot and cold water. She just giggled. "That will never get old!"

Harry hoped that this concert he had been invited to was going to be easier to deal with than a day with the Senshi.

Shortly before the Outers took Cuteness home at dinner time, Ami made her move for Harry. She used the traditional way to get a date when you weren't willing to ask the boy yourself; Ami asked Cuteness to ask Harry to ask Ami out one night that week. Giggling, Cuteness agreed. Usagi went home with Cuteness to get more ghostly mother-daughter time in.

After the Outers left, Harry's 'dates' for the evening had to go get ready. Harry took a nap. An hour later, Minako woke Harry up by sitting on his lap.

"Ready Harry?"

With his nod, they left for the nearest subway station. Harry was impressed by the Tokyo subway, not that he'd been allowed much time in British commuter trains for comparison and the Hogwarts Express really didn't count as it was magical and not muggle. During the subway ride and subsequent short walk to the concert, Ami and Minako took it upon themselves to give him a short lecture on the Nippon Budokan and Morning Musume. Several local guys gave the foreigner with four hot dates jealous looks but nobody made a scene of it.

After feeling a bit out of place in the beginning, Harry was finally starting to relax. While there were plenty of guys at the concert, he was the only non-Japanese person in sight. Wait, there were two waaaaay over there. Oh, well... he was still being stared at less than he would be on a bad day in the Great Hall of Hogwarts, like his first feast ever or the Heir of Slytherin mess or the Goblet of Fire... Compared to being in Hogwarts, he was practically invisible here.

The music was light and fun sounding. Some of it failed to impress Harry but his escorts were eating it up. Even Rei seemed to have gotten into the right mood. The most recent act, four girls in the most girlishly pink outfits he'd seen yet, were even getting him to sort-of-dance to their songs. Of course, that's when things were destined to go to hell.

Harry should have learned by now that if a massive dangerous beast was alive in his vicinity, he would be forced to deal with it before too long. Halfway through a song, the sound cut off. Though the concert lighting died, emergency lighting actually brightened the place up a bit. Something dark and wiggly started rising over a corner of the stage. If the screaming girls, mucous covered tentacles and ill defined body were any indication, this was what Hermione described as a tentacle demon. Harry was not in the mood to watch girls get raped and eaten. Oh, goody; two more of them just came out from under the other side.

"Fuck!" Minako swore loudly, "Why do monsters have to attack every fucking time we go to a concert or group thing together? Every damn time!"

Minako, Rei, Makoto and Ami were pushing him to a exit, but there was no good way out. The middle of a crowd was not a good place to transform either. Luckily, Harry could help with that.

He pulled out his wand and cast notice-me-nots on the girls and himself. As they got ready to transform unmolested, Harry tried to come up with some kind of plan. Well, the Japanese have already seen a blonde on a broom haven't they? He cast aguamenti at his foot and pulled out her Firebolt. By the time she was in the air, a demon had one of the singers pinned to the stage floor and the poor girl was screaming bloody murder. Harry let her notice-me-not fall and cast a reductor curse at the tentacle wriggling up to the singer's knickers.

Got it! Judging by the inhuman screech, getting a tentacle blasted off must hurt really bad. The demon pulled back in shock long enough for that last singer to stumble over the side of the stage and get picked up by a couple of the security staff.

As Harry swung around the stage just a few meters under the roof structure, she looked for an important looking bit of demon.

"Reducto! Reducto!"

This cry was accompanied by Mars Flame Sniper and Jupiter Oak Evolution. Lots of the trapped crowd would now have to clean demon goo off of their clothes when they got home.

Venus had been holding the second beasty in place with a Love-Me-Chain until Mars and Jupiter could splatter it like the first one. Mercury trapped the third demon in a Mercury Aqua Mist before turning it into a cloud of demon goo with a Mercury Aqua Rhapsody.

Harry, Mars, Jupiter and Venus stayed on guard until till Mercury reported in.

_"We're clear! Those were the only three demons here."_

The Senshi began to complain to each other that this was really Devil Hunter Clan work. Sacrificing their lives on a constant basis was one thing but becoming the star of a porn video when the fight ended poorly was a real risk when dealing with these things. Those Devil Hunters were kinda into that. Not Senshi. Well.. there was that one dream Jupiter had - but she wasn't about to tell anyone else.

Harry couldn't help but be impressed. If they could just get past muggle repellers and notice-me-nots, these girls would slaughter the Death Eaters. It was about this time when Harry realized that more than ten thousand concert going fans were now cheering for her and the Senshi. The singers were re-mounting the stage in front of the Senshi.

Bloody hell.

Harry dropped down to the stage and stepped off her Firebolt. While concert lighting and sound systems were being restored in the background, someone slammed into Harry and gave her a bone crushing hug. The singer who narrowly escaped public defilement was crying and babbling and hugging Harry for all she was worth. Harry looked over to Venus, Mars, Jupiter and Mercury. They were similarly occupied with the rest of the singers. Thankfully, the concert security staff was effectively keeping the crowd at bay.

Harry's personal J-Pop singer must have noticed that she didn't understand much of what was being said to her. The girl studied Harry for a moment and asked, "Do you speak English?"

"Right, sorry. I'm not this Tsukino bird the news is talking about." Harry began to relax. Too bad for her.

"I'm Mika Todd, and you are?"

"Ha-e-eather." Panic! Panic! Girl's name! Not Potter! Very not Potter! "Heather Snape."

Bloody hell, that's worse than telling the truth.

"Well, Heather Snape! I owe you my life, you and the Sailor Senshi with you tonight!"

The Senshi were all smiles. Then the crowd roared. 'No, no, no, no. Please tell me they didn't just restore the sound system right before I talked to a singer on stage.' Yes, that's just what happened. Each of the Senshi were given a standing ovation in turn. Mars, Jupiter, Mercury and Venus were just eating this up. Well, at least Harry recovered from almost giving her real name. Sweet Merlin, please let this night be over soon.

After a few minutes trying hard to not exist and praying that the singers would decide to start singing again, she and the girls finally caught a break long enough to leave the Budokan. Questions thrown out to Harry from the crowd as she flew overhead included: where was she from, was she a real witch, was she a new mahou shoujo, what were her sizes and did she swallow. She almost hexed that last one, but the Senshi pulled her back.

By the time they hit the subway station four beautiful local girls and a very embarrassed British boy were walking back to the subway station in silence. When they got back to the station at Azabu Juban, Harry returned their original hair and eye colors and offered to escort each girl to their homes. Being a little further out than the other three, Rei asked him how he would do that. Harry smirked that Potter smirk and answered.

"Magic."

Rei got to experience her first broom ride. Since Harry was driving, he didn't even try to go slow. It would be Rei's last ride if she had anything to say about it. Harry apparated back to the station and then proceeded to give Ami, Makoto and Minako each a high speed broom ride back to their homes, Harry apparating back to the station after each drop off. Being the last girl in line, Minako begged for a slow broom ride.

That fight had turned her on in the worst way. Monsters, a new ally, on-stage public recognition; that fight was what she wanted them all to be like. Once they were coasting smoothly over the rooftops, Minako proved that she would have made Gryffindor proud by twisting around, reaching behind Harry's head and snogging his brains out.

By the time Harry stepped into the main living room of his temporary home, he was in far too good a mood to remember that people may have a reason to be waiting up for him.

"Welcome home Heather." Hotness was smirking. They all were. Wait, she said Hea...ther... oh. News sure as hell travels fast in the muggle world.

**End Chapter**

**Omake – You can't have a Senshi. Not yours.**

Sometime after September First. Lunch in the Great Hall of Hogwarts.

"Not funny 'Mione! When hit by cold water I become a Magical Alien Princess with influence out past the orbit of planet Pluto! This is loads more to deal with than Hagrid knocking down the door and saying 'You're a wizard, Harry'." Harry's new magical disability was not getting the respect she felt it deserved.

The blonde wheeled around to Ron with a manic look in her eyes. "And YES it means I'm even more famous than I used to be and YES it means I'm even more powerful and rich than I used to be and NO I won't order any of my loyal-beautiful-alien-magical-princess-senshi to bed you even though we've been 'best mates' for years now!"

Someone had just kicked Ron's puppy.

"Pluto!" Harry bellowed.

Pluto heeded his call by materializing in the center of the Great Hall, Garnet Rod in hand. This was **fun**. "Yes, Princess Serenity?"

"I order you and the others to NEVER have sex with Ron Weasley for any reason ever!"

Someone had just kicked Ron's puppy and then shot it.

"Your will be done. Are we to pleasure anyone here, my Princess?"

"Good question." The hormone level in the teenager filled dining hall went up exponentially.

Harry smiled. It was a Weasley Twin Smile. "Senshi Pluto. I grant you and the other Senshi the right to seduce any willing witch fifth year and above with any house affiliation."

Luna Lovegood stood up and turned to Pluto. Bringing her arms forward to maximize cleavage, the dirty blonde posed her best 'sexy' pose and gave a very obvious wink to the Senshi. Sailor Pluto nodded to Luna before turning her intense gaze upon Hermione.

"Must they be willing, Highness?" 'Oh, Hotness, you know how to turn me on.'

"I'm afraid so. Though I bet not every girl who would enjoy your attention would be willing to admit it in public... you may have some sport on your hands. To that end, I grant you leave to conduct a... hard sell."

Pluto continued to gaze at Hermione during Harry's royal decree. For her part, Hermione quickly became flush faced and began to shake a little. Unable to withstand the Senshi's obvious interest, 'Mione bolted from the table and the room. Pluto appeared to track her progress through solid walls while audibly counting down from ten.

At 'zero' Pluto disappeared.

A faint female shriek was heard through the open doors of the Great Hall before it abruptly cut off.

Damn this going to be fun.

**End Chapter**

REV 08/2012


	11. Blood Sugar Sex Magic

**Chapter Eleven: Blood Sugar Sex Magic**

August 12th, 1996

That was some night. Cuteness kept making little jokes about Grandpa Snivelly. Harry needed a way to stop that. He was sure each 'Grandpa Snivelly' was worth a gray hair.

If breakfast was going to be any indication of how often the little girl was going to repeat the same joke, then Harry really had to come up with a good defense. Cuteness asked why Grandpa Snivelly wasn't sending her presents on her birthday and why Grandpa Snivelly hasn't visited over holidays and did Grandpa Snivelly ever take Mommy over his knee?

Brrrrrrrrrrr. It had to end. Now.

"Cuteness, Luv, has anyone ever told you how you were made?" Harry was going to turn the tables. "Well, one night sometime in the future, I'm going to approach your Mummy from behind and pinch her arse cheeks."

Cuteness went quiet and her eyebrows scrunched up. Harry kept going.

"And then I'm going to run my hands up under her skirt and hook my fingers into the sides of her knickers and -"

"Nooooo! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" She had screwed her eyes shut tight and had her hands over her little ears. _"My Mommy is pure and innocent and YOU CAN'T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT about her!"_

Michiru and Haruka were desperate to hold in their laughs. Hotaru really wanted to know what Harry told her best friend to rile her up so. She decided to try harder in English class from now on.

As it was Monday, all of the girls were out of the house until classes let out. After several hectic days, Harry felt he deserved a break. He took it slow and easy until dinner.

"Hey! Old man!" Dinner was nearly over and Cuteness had a job to do.

"_Chibi-usa! It is improper to show such disrespect to your father. Please apologize."_

Michiru was back to enforcing tradition and propriety again. Harry thought it was funny that Haruka would put her hand on Michiru's thigh every time the teal haired girl tried to position herself as the moral compass of the house. Setsuna would be a better role model if not for all her disappearances to go do Merlin knew what.

Cuteness flicked some ice water over to Harry. Just enough for her purposes, it turns out. _"Looks like I'm disrespecting my mother from here. _Hey Princess Daddy!"

"Yes, Cuteness?"

"When are you going to ask Ami to go out with you Friday night?"

"I'm going out with Ami on Friday night?"

Yes, he was. Cuteness was clear on that matter. After a little back and forth with input from the others, Harry had a plan and Ami's number. Ten minutes later, Harry had a date. On the other end of the phone line, Ami was getting grilled by her mother. In a rare celestial alignment, Doctor Mizuno had been home for dinner and got to the phone before her daughter did. The oral exam on relationships Doctor Mizuno gave her daughter kept the poor girl blushing for hours.

That evening, and for the next three days, Harry followed a simple pattern. Mealtimes were for him and Cuteness. Rest and relaxation during the day was followed by entertainment and the odd vigilante act every evening. Heather Snape was getting a reputation. Soon she'd have action figures. Little else disturbed Harry within the bastion of magical girlishness known as the Outer's house.

Little else except for phone calls, that is. Tuesday night, Minako called and asked when Harry was going to take her out. Saturday? No, Silly, Rei will be calling for her date with Usagi and you better give her Saturday. When then? Minako wanted Sunday night as that _was _their one week anniversary. Harry was quite sorry that he had forgotten. Yes, he was. Really. Really really. Brilliant. Wednesday night, Ami called back on Rei's behalf. Yes, Ami, Harry was sure that Usagi would be delighted to spend Saturday afternoon with Rei. Harry almost pointed out that the ghost was blushing next to him during that call.

Speaking of blushing dead girls, Usagi has become a standard fixture in Harry's morning ritual. Showering as a ghost pervs on him was weird no matter how many times Harry had to experience it. And that one time he was rinsing his hair, he was sure that a cold _something _had touched his... but he really didn't want to think about that.

* * *

"Ahhhh, Severus," the words dripped off of the Dark Lord's tongue. They would sound warm and inviting to anyone who did not know Voldemort as well as Severus Snape did but the Potions Master knew better. He was even now compiling a list of why and how Harry Potter was going to pay for this.

The most despised Hogwarts professor in modern times limped into Lord Voldemort's throne room. A hastily transfigured fake foot and shoe may hide his injury well enough when standing but he had no cure for the noticeable dip in his stride. He dropped to both knees after some effort. Maybe if he was lucky, he would die tonight and be free of this deadly web of masters.

Better today's snake food than next week's torture toy.

"My Lord. We did not come back with Potter. I... I suspect that Headmaster Dumbledore has obliviated me of what did transpire." Severus kept his gaze to the ground as he spoke. "Aside from evidence that I was on the losing side of a duel of some sort, I can only assume that Asian magicals repelled us both."

The Dark Lord looked at his spy for a few moments. Really, there was only one option. "Look at me."

Severus complied immediately. Lord Voldemort spent the better part of ten minutes poking, prodding, smashing and beating his way through the Potions Master's mind. The Old Man had covered his tracks, but not completely. Voldemort was angry. Insulted even.

"Severus. What in Morgana's name were you and Albus Dumbledore doing with _**strippers**_?"

Severus was sure. This was going to hurt. Bad.

* * *

August 13th, 1996

Muggle repeller. Notice-me-not. Notice-me-not on the broom. Harry could tell she was close to getting the disillusionment charm. Just a little more time was all she needed. Teen Witch began to blur through the cityscape of Azabu-Juban. This was brilliant!

Watch for helicopters and low flying... aliens? Was that a flying horned girl wearing a tiger striped bikini? No doubt about it. Tokyo is brilliant. Harry would bring all her mates next time.

* * *

Things weren't looking good for Miyako. Her ex-boyfriend and his gang had surrounded the girl and Ehara-sensei. These guys looked like they were in the mood to rough up a teacher.

Miyako looked for some way, any way, to get out of the alley they had found themselves trapped in. No, there were too many thugs. Kou's power and reputation were why she'd gone out with him in the first place, after all. Tonight, Kou would get revenge for being dropped for the damned homeroom teacher. Miyako didn't want Ehara-sensei to loose his job over her; but tonight the shy man was in serious danger of being sent to the hospital because of her.

She closed her eyes slowly. Sacrificing herself to the lusts of these thugs was the only way she could think of to save him. Ehara-sensei would be ignored; all she had to do was take her clothes off. Miyako's hands went to the hem of her shirt as her eyes opened.

'That's odd... why are Kou's thugs just looking around like we're not right in front of them?' Miyako looked over to her teacher/love interest Ehara-sensei . Before the little redhead could so much as squeak, Harry tagged her with a petrification jinx just like her boyfriend. It wouldn't do for her to panic and disrupt the notice-me-nots Harry had placed on the two.

Now, Harry just needed to clear the alley of thugs. She smiled. This crime-fighting thing made up for years of Harry Hunting.

Harry had been coasting through Azabu-Juban and the neighboring districts when she first noticed the petty crimes and harassment that seemed to linger in the darker corners of every city. Limited though Harry's spell repertoire was, she had just enough tricks and pranks to utterly humiliate just about any small time muggle street thug.

As Kou and his boys tried to make sense of the fact that they had just lost Miyako and that damned teacher, a disturbing thing happened. He began to grow hair at an unbelievable rate. Green and red plaid hair. The clothes on his biggest underling suddenly shrank so much that he and two other guys were trying to tear the seams before the panicking thug was squeezed out.

Harry knew that in England this was called muggle baiting. There were differences of course; no self respecting English wizard would lift a finger to help a muggle in need. Can you imagine? Over a hundred thousand super-hero capable people in the British Isles and Continental Europe and they didn't do anything for the common man. Sad, really.

Muggle baiting would carry a fine and time in Azkaban if they convicted her on the charges. Harry didn't care. The British Ministry of Magic was more likely to drum up worse charges and railroad her if she didn't roll over for them anyway. They could just sod off for all she cared. Harry's 'saving people' thing was more than willing to ignore English Magical Law while in England and ignoring it in Japan was even easier. There was no way she'd allow such a law to stop her from protecting these two people below her.

Tonight, Harry Potter wasn't the Wizarding World's precious yet unstable Boy-Who-Lived. Tonight, she was a Comic Book Super Hero. Okay, Heroine. So... the 'good citizens' are protected for now. It's time to play.

* * *

Remus Lupin, werewolf and ex-D.A.D.A. professor, stepped up behind the two girls who had been conversing under a privacy ward. Ginny's eyes only widened marginally when she heard Remus clear his throat. Hermione jumped as if she had just noticed a Weasley Wizarding Wheezes tag on her mattress. Lupin noticed the first and second Teen Witch articles from the Daily Prophet still sitting between them. Each article had the pictures carefully removed and lined up on Ginny's bedding. Then he saw the letter with Harry's easily distinguishable scrawl.

"Miss Weasley? Miss Granger? I trust you can tell me why that letter in front of you has not yet made it to an Order meeting. Has Dumbledore seen it yet?"

Remus was a little surprised that these two would hold back something as important as a letter from Harry. To hear them speak, each one wanted Harry to return to England twice as much as the Headmaster. For a brief moment, Remus tried to predict which girl Harry's parents would have approved of. But, no; there was trouble here and he intended to find it out.

The girls looked at each other and nodded. Ginny handed the letter to her ex-professor. Several minutes later the letter fell gracelessly out of Remus's near lifeless hands. If the full moon were closer than two weeks away then surely the man would have had a coughing fit. He began to look at the photos taking careful note of the ink notations on the edges of each photo.

"You to don't simply believe this girl to be an illegitimate Snape as the paper is touting, do you?" They both shook their heads.

Hermione spoke up, "If the Headmaster hasn't already thought of Harry being Heather, we don't want him to start because of us."

Remus shook his head. "But do you really believe that the Headmaster would make Harry marry Severus? It's an unbelievable claim! And to have to bear a child? How could that be true?"

"Harry just finished proving himself right to the whole of the Wizarding World not two months ago and you still refuse to believe his word when he gives it?"

Even as Hermione said it, she was trying to convince herself as much as Remus. She had always trusted authorities until she saw just how foolish and corrupt the Ministry of Magic really was. Could the Headmaster also have an agenda? One that was less than pure? Hermione has only had one real constant in her life since she was eleven. Harry. Hermione set a mental reminder to go through her first and second year notes and essays and remove all fourty-three instances of the words 'Mrs. Hermione Dumbledore' and nine instances of 'Mrs. Albus Dumbledore nee Granger'.

"Let's test our theory then." Hermione challenged. "Does Dumbledore come to the meetings early or late?"

Remus wondered what she was on about. "Albus and Severus are usually the last ones in attendance."

"Take this letter with you for the next meeting. Show all the others before Albus tries to hide it away. Tell us his reaction. There must be others in the Order that will believe Harry." Hermione had a horrible thought. "You don't think he'll come to us after the meeting do you? To ask us about the letter?"

Remus thought that there was a good chance of that. Albus won't like being one-upped in the information department. He nodded.

"I don't want to be obliviated, but what can we do?" Ginny was near tears. They were pretty sure they knew what Harry's 'animagus form' was, but were scared now of what trouble this could cause Harry knowing his 'issues' with the Potions Master and the Headmaster. "I'm beginning to think that he shouldn't come back no matter how bad it gets for us." Snif.

"First, get rid of your notes."

They began shredding and burning the photos and papers in a small pile in the middle of the bedroom.

"Now, the two of you. If you so much as think the Headmaster or Severus suspect you know more than they do, come to me. I'll tell you girls when the meeting starts. Stay in the back orchard. If you see the Headmaster apparate or floo here, go to the forest between the Burrow and Luna's home. I'll be waiting."

They knew what that would mean. Obliviation. They nodded.

"Otherwise, try to always have legitimate reasons to keep your distance and don't look them in the eyes if you can help it. Legilimency requires eye contact."

More nods. The two witches also agreed in private not to draft letters to Harry unless they checked each other for little remarks that might be noticed if someone tried to screen their post.

Moony began to laugh as he walked away from two concerned witches. "I swear. Prongs, Lily, you would be so proud of your son to see him now. I just know it."

* * *

Miyako must have been dreaming. There is no other explanation for what just happened. 'Ehara-sensei?' She was in his arms. Oh, thank the Kami! She could move again!

The two fell to their knees, holding each other tight and neither wanting to let go. Over Ehara-sensei's shoulder, she could see the last thug staggering out of the narrow alley entrance covered in feces and various other... fluids.

"_Teacher?" _Her voice wavered.

"_Yes, Miyako?" _He didn't feel like calling her Miss Hase after what they just went through. Truth be told, Mrs. Ehara sounded a lot better.

"_Did that really just happen?" _Was it just Tokiro's imagination, or has Miyako failed to even blink since this all started. What were the signs of shock again?

"_I'm sure we didn't see Kou's hair go plaid or that one guy start vomiting slugs or those guys that had bats come from their noses... or those other guys and the flying monkeys. Flying crap monkeys. No, I refuse to believe any of that actually happened." _When in doubt of your own sanity: deny, deny, deny.

Miyako was just about ready to unleash some major tears but Ehara-sensei addressed someone behind her.

"Miss Snape, please accept my deepest gratitude for your help tonight. We were in a bad position."

Ehara-sensei was the English teacher at a very exclusive all-girls high school. Of course he was good at it. Miyako was one of the better English students in his class too.

"Please, don't mention it. I was just passing through. I'm not sure, but a police patrol looked like it might have been able to get here in time. I just had to be sure, though." Harry was hovering on her broom sans stealth charms a few feet behind Miyako.

This must be what the Senshi felt when on stage after the tentacle demon fight. Even better than saving those rat bastards like Fudge and Skeeter, these people were really nice and thanked her honestly. One day soon, Harry was going to drag Hermione and Ron into a deep debate on the Statutes of Secrecy and the future of the Magical/Muggle schism. Japan was the perfect test base as far as Harry was concerned.

The end of the alley was indeed beginning to fill up with flashing colored lights. Police had found the thugs. All three saw this and flinched together.

"Look, I should leave now -"

"Please wait!" Miyako saw a way out for Ehara-sensei. "Our relationship is delicate right now. If others found out about it, Tokiro could lose his job."

"Ohhhhh. Got it."

Harry thought for a moment. The Firebolt could carry one passenger, but two? And the police seemed to be moving closer. Harry looked up to the rooftops. None of them were at a good angle for her line-of-sight apparition to work well. She had another idea...

"Umm, Tokiro?" He nodded. "I've got an idea that may or may not work. I can teleport, but I need to have a good picture in my head of where I'm going."

He nodded uncertainly.

"I'll do it." Miyako may not have been living with Ehara-sensei very long, but she had quickly become the Mistress of his apartment. She even knew where all the cracked tiles and stains were.

"Okay, fine. Just focus on where we are going. Make your mental image as clear and as detailed as you can."

Miyako closed her eyes for a few seconds, then opened them confidently. Harry put her wand against the redhead's temple and began to slowly draw a copied memory out. This experiment was all about intent. Harry intended to use the girl's memory as if it were her own. After slowly bringing the glowing strand around from one temple to another, Harry accepted the memory. When she blinked again, she had a very clear mental picture of a room in a home she'd never been to before. It was a very detailed view, right down to the cracked floor tiles. Harry asked for their hands and

-pop-

Tomorrow, Miyako's friends were going to be so jealous. A personalized autographed photo of Miyako and Heather Snape, a.k.a. Teen Witch. This was big. Almost as big as admitting to Tokiro that she loved him. That happened too.

* * *

August 16th, 1996

Harry was just floating above Azabu-Juban station, hoping she could find a damsel in distress for Teen Witch to deal with. It was going to be a real shame leaving this to head back to Scotland and Hogwarts. Harry made a mental note to write down a list of things that she needed to do or acquire before heading back. She did not want anyone back home learning about her connection to Teen Witch's escapades. Ten minutes before Ami was supposed to show up, Harry moved into an alley and applied hot water.

His date coaches had told him that Ami was the smartest girl any of them knew. Ami was also a girl who read romance novels and sometimes listened to gossip when she wasn't studying. Harry began to wonder if she were a Japanese Hermione. Looks like his first impression was going to be close to the truth. But how was he supposed to keep her happy on a date when she knew so much and he knew so little? Cuteness pointed out that he was well versed in one area of study that she knew little about: Western wand based magic. Just introduce her to that topic and Harry would be able to keep Ami's attention for hours.

As it turned out, Cuteness was right in one. After taking the subway into Shinjuku, a popular shopping and entertainment district, the two picked a warm looking ramen shop and settled in for some mental foreplay. Tonight's topic: magic. They weren't concerned with people overhearing considering how loud the restaurant was... and even if someone did overhear then they would probably chalk it up to two fantasy/D&D nerds talking about their favorite game or series.

"I still find it hard to believe that there are so many varied styles of magic around the world."

Despite being a magical girl herself, Ami was surprised that witches really did ride brooms and that unicorns and centaurs could be found in the Forbidden Forest. Actual real live unicorns.

"You should have been at Jusenkyo when Red and I were running our experiments. On second thought, I'm glad you were here." Behind her glasses, Ami raised one delicate eyebrow. "The pools are far too dangerous to risk you on, Ami. I don't want to see you fall in the Spring of Drowned Chipmunk or some such nonsense."

In order to stop her blushing, Ami forced out a question. "And what did your experiments discover? That is, if you don't mind sharing."

"I'd love to. Well, I should start by explaining the difference between you and me and then move on from there. First, wizards and witches have what we call a magical core inside each of us. Our magic comes from these cores to do our bidding. While we may have potential to use magic without a wand, that's really only an instinctive thing children do or a rare skill for those older witches and wizards who are truly gifted. Oh, there are some magics that don't need a wand. I could still fly my broom without a wand in hand." Harry paused to take a drink.

Ami picked up the explanation taking it to its logical conclusion. "So, I'm not a witch because my magic comes from outside of me, a different planet to be exact."

"Right in one." Harry thought he was doing really good. Why didn't his date with Cho go nearly this well? Well, Harry wasn't about to leave Ami in the middle of their date just to start an illegal club. Luckily, she was already in one. "And then there is what Ranma and I learned about crystals..."

Harry and Ami finished their ramen. The talk about crystals and magic continued over a walk down some of the retail store laden streets of Shinjuku. They discussed Harry and Ranma's magical experiments at length over iced coffee at a street level cafe where the neon and LCD display lighting was bright enough to challenge any city on Earth. After a bit of window shopping, Harry pulled out his letter from Hermione and let Ami read it over ice cream. He was about to suggest they start heading back to Azabu-Juban when he noticed a storefront behind Ami with displays even more unusual than anything else he'd seen on their date so far. That store had a racing broom in the front window.

"Ami?"

"Yes?" She liked it when he said her name. She looked down to hide her blush.

"We should probably head back soon. But first, there is a store behind you that we absolutely must go into."

The store was as noisy and busy inside as any other they'd been through but Harry soldiered on. Incense. Quartz and semiprecious stones. Votive candles and books on pagans and druids. Not exactly what Harry was looking for to tell the truth. After walking all the way into the back, Harry was beginning to think that the broom was the only genuine magical item there. Otherwise it just appeared to be a muggle style occult shop. Luckily, holding Ami's hand while looking around was keeping her happy enough. Harry stopped by what appeared to be a stock room door.

"I'm sorry Ami. I thought there would be more genuine magic in here after seeing the broom in the window." Harry stepped in between the displays and leaned up against the door. Ami's eyes went wide.

"Harry? How are you standing in cheap incense?" To her, it looked like Harry had stepped into a wall display, occupying the same space. "We may have found what you are looking for."

Harry stepped away from the door and opened it. After looking through for a moment, he retook Ami's hand and stepped into the hidden display room.

This new room was every bit as disorganized and moody as the muggle occult shop they had just left but Harry recognized a lot of what he saw. One display had a couple of pensieves. Next to those were several rows of magical texts with titles written in Asian languages. Several glass cases held rows of jewelry, daggers and assorted items that resembled those silver things Headmaster Dumbledore kept in his office. After being alone in the room for about three minutes of wordlessly scanning the displays, Harry and Ami were joined by what may have been a goblin of some kind. This one was more of a light green, his mouth did not have such sharp teeth and his ears tended to stick out a bit rather than back to the rear.

The storekeeper had paused and mumbled to himself just before speaking to Harry. Was it a translation charm? "Welcome, you are. My store, this is. Buy, sell and trade, I do. If questions you have, answer I will as best I can."

"Thank you for letting us look. I do have several things that I may consider trading so that I can get gifts for my friends."

Harry had seen a whole display of hair ornaments like his kanzashi. Few were gold like his, but he took that to mean that this stock would be more affordable. He needed to get his extra Jusenkyo treasures from the Outer's house.

"Excuse me," Harry called to the shopkeeper, "but is there a spot in your shop I can use to apparate to and from?"

The short shop owner nodded and pointed to a green diagram on the floor near the door. Harry half expected to find a red pentagram. Instead, there was a triangle inscribed in a circle inscribed in a square. Harry kissed Ami's knuckles before letting go of her hand.

"I'll be right back."

-pop-

Thirty seconds later, Harry pop'd back into the room with his bookbag and began to pull various items out of a rough cloth sack. If nothing else, he would learn what these things were before leaving.

After several 'ahh's and 'hmmm's, Harry was clear on what each item was for and how much the proprietor believed it to be worth. He added the water repellant bracelet into the stack of items he was willing to trade. As soon as he heard that the other ring was a universal translator, Harry pretended that he had placed that one there by accident and apologized that it was not for sale. The other items, he could do without.

"Ami? Is there anything in here that catches your fancy?" Harry noticed that she had been glancing at the bookshelves on and off the whole time that he and the shopkeeper were haggling.

She blushed and asked the little green goblin about one of the books behind the counter. She had found a book titled 'Avatar'. She never dreamed that she may find a book on her own class of magic as mahou shoujo almost always learned the hard way by fighting their enemies. Magical girl textbooks… that was a concept that the girl found had potential. After all, wizards and witches like Harry went to school to learn their craft and secrecy was just as vital to them as it was to the Senshi if not moreso.

They were mostly silent as they took the subway back to Azabu-Juban and started walking to her home. The young magical couple traveled the full distance back to Juban hand in hand. Ami's other arm tightly held the four hundred year old book on avatar magic as she dreamt of the day that magical girls would have their own school. She smiled dreamily each time she gazed upon her new reading material.

Brave, intelligent, magical and easy on the eyes… watching the girl made Harry think of Hermione. Of course there was a difference between saving Harry from Voldemort and saving the Earth from demonic aliens and Harry suspected that Ami was even more advanced her non-magical education than Hermione was in her magical education. If anything, Ami was more Hermione-esque than Hermione was. Speaking of smart girls, maybe Ami could help him with one of his problems.

"Ami?" She's blushing again. Considering what the future has in store for him, Harry's beginning to wonder if this date hasn't gone a little too well. "I'm concerned about part of the fight we had with my professors."

"You are concerned that I couldn't detect the Headmaster's cloaking magics?"

Very just like Hermione, this one. Scary, really. They need to meet one day.

"Brilliant deduction. That's exactly it."

She's blushing again. Does Ami not get enough praise in school or at home?

"I'm not sure how to fix it, but I fear that the Headmaster may come back to Japan and try to recruit the Senshi into his service. I don't trust him to play fair next time."

"I can research the topic. Perhaps my new book," she squeezed both the new book and Harry's hand in emphasis, "will hold the answers. I can also run tests on your farewell gifts."

Harry had purchased twelve sets of silver kanzashi. One set for each living Senshi and one set each for Hermione, Ginny and Luna. He had also purchased one gold kanzashi set for Usagi. Aside from the kanzashi sets and Ami's book, Harry spent the remainder of his store credit on four bracelets which could nullify muggle repelling charms and wards. He'd take one with him for Usagi and leave the other three for Senshi business.

Ami's stomach was doing acrobatics under her skin. She hadn't expected to like Harry so much. She could really see this going further _but_…. But Harry is now what Mamoru was. Usagi's future husband. On the other hand, Usagi came back from the dead just long enough to give Ami permission to be with Harry if she wanted to. Time was running short. Harry would leave Japan in a few days and Ami didn't know when he was coming back. She needed to stall long enough to be sure of her course of action.

"Would you like to come in for some tea?" Ami tried to sound confident. She couldn't tell if it worked.

"I'd love to, Ami. I say, that's a sneaky trick. No Englishman will refuse tea." They both chuckled as Ami lead Harry into her condominium.

The tea was excellent, as he knew it would be. Ami seemed nervous, was she uncomfortable alone with him? Maybe he'd better go.

It was a hard decision to make. Ami had grown up in a country where girls were told they should save themselves for the man they marry. They were also expected to stay together once they did marry and yet Ami's own parents were divorced. Among her friends, Ami was beginning to wonder if she was the only virgin left short of Hotaru and Chibi-usa. As innocent as Usagi liked to act in life, she was more than willing to gossip about what she had or hadn't done with Mamoru. Well, with Rei's feelings about Usagi now out in the open, Ami could believe Rei was still a virgin. At least Rei would be until tomorrow night, anyway. Outside of the Senshi, Ami had no other real friends or love interests. One or two boys had tried to talk to her, but she knew immediately that they were wrong for her.

If Harry had a genius level IQ, Ami may have fought off Usagi to keep him. Even if he didn't have as well rounded an education as most due to his rather focused wizarding school, Harry was clearly intelligent... and cute... and brave... and Pluto approved of him and Chibi-usa worshiped the ground Harry walked on.

When Ami noticed Harry looking at the wall clock for a moment before bracing himself to get out of his chair, she put her hand down on his. Ami looked him in the eyes.

"Please don't go."

* * *

"That must have been one hell of a book you bought Ami."

Setsuna was still up. On reflection, Harry has never caught Hotness in the act of sleeping, getting ready for bed or even getting ready in the morning. She always looked clean, refreshed and ready to go. Must be part of that 'we don't know where she spends her time' thing.

"She is a very wonderful girl." It was true. Harry thought that he would get a goodnight kiss out of the evening and that would be it. He had no idea that Ami had chosen him to be her First. "I am a little concerned about how well we did work out. Did I just hurt Ami?"

"Don't be silly. She will not get between you and Usagi unless you ask her too." What? Unless we _ask_ her- "You should get to bed. Usagi and Rei will have a big night tonight and Usagi needs your beauty sleep."

What?

"Goodnight, Harry."

It wasn't worth arguing. He really was spent.

"Goodnight, Setsuna."

* * *

August 18th, 1996

Harry began to stir. On the plus side, being possessed by Usagi for twelve or more hours straight didn't give Harry the horrible headache that a night of Firewhiskey provided. On the minus side, the memory loss, strong smells and physical soreness were all present. Wait. The strong smells were all wrong. And then there is the fact that his... sorry... her pillow had skin. Soft creamy warm skin. Skin?

Harry tried not to panic. She may now have experience... er, _you know_... with someone but this whole waking up next to someone thing was new.

Harry opened her eyes. Rei was there staring right back at her. Well, Rei's left eye was pointed at Harry. Her right eye was hidden behind the smooth curve of Rei's right breast. Bloody hell. Harry closed her eyes and rose to a sitting position. She stayed that way until the miko was dressed and clear of the room. Harry then dressed and got together some bathing supplies while trying very hard, and failing, to not study the scent of the room. That was the scent of two girls who thoroughly shagged each other senseless. Harry sincerely hoped she would get to smell that again one day.

She opened the bedroom door and looked down the hall. Hotness was smirking.

"_Did I give her a book too?" _

Harry had the translator ring on. Maybe by speaking in Japanese, she could finally be one step ahead of Hotness this morning.

"_No, you sat on her face." _

Hotness kept the initiative. Harry could not have it.

Usagi was briefly visible for a few seconds at a time as she zipped back and forth through walls between rooms and down hallways. Getting laid must have done the dead girl a world of good. She couldn't stop moving.

Rei got cleaned up first, then Harry went through the motions thoroughly. She didn't want to smell like Rei any longer than he had to. When he made it to the bottom of the staircase, he noticed that the full Senshi were assembled and giving Rei hell for last night.

"_Really, Rei. While I approve of you bedding a beautiful young woman, most people frown on being intimate with the dead. It can't be healthy." _Haruka drawled.

The older blonde was delighted to find a girl who was clearly freakier than she was. Cuteness and Hotaru were used to hearing this kind of teasing at home but they still blushed at the grown-up subject matter. Cuteness was holding her ears shut due to her mother being the focus of attention. When she saw Harry, she ran over to him and switched her hands with Harry's so she could scratch an itch and do a thorough bogey inspection.

"_Haruka, are you jealous that she got to Usagi first or that she bedded a dead girl first?" _Harry taunted in return.

This ring was brilliant. And it worked for any language. Harry was becoming quite the jewelry collector.

"_And when did you learn how to speak Japanese?" _Makoto felt like she missed out. Ami's date obviously went very well if her distracted happy state this morning was anything to go by.

"_Did I forget to mention that we found out one of his Jusenkyo treasures was a translator ring?" _Ami had been very tight lipped about what had happened on her date. This could only mean one thing to the other girls: the date was a really good one.

"_You forgot to mention quite a bit. But now that Harry is here __**and **__we speak the same language, I figure I'll get it out of him first!" _

Ami paled. Minako and Makoto both caught the tell and turned to Harry.

"_If you promise not to interrogate me about how wonderful Ami is, then you can all have presents." _

Bribes. Simple yet effective. And for extra credit, Ami was blushing madly for all to see.

"_And they are very nice presents. We went into the store and picked them out together." _

She agreed, bribe them. Quickly.

-pop-

Harry chose to apparate upstairs to speed things up a bit. Ami deserved as much.

-pop-

Harry gave each girl a wrapped box. They all smiled and dug into the wrapping. 'Oooooo' 'Ahhhhhh'

"_And don't worry about your hair's current length. These kanzashi sets are new. They are designed to alter your hair length if necessary. It goes back to original length once you pull them out." _

Even Haruka was impressed and she hardly ever put time into her hair. Maybe it's _because_ she never put any time into her hair that she valued them… Every girl in the room save Haruka used them immediately. Setsuna had picked Harry's standard single bun and braid. Harry couldn't tell if it was an accident or an indirect thank you.

Harry pulled out a bigger box. It had three of the four anti muggle repeller bracelets.

"_This box has three bracelets which can help you girls get past muggle repelling magics. Should be useful if the Headmaster decides to visit Tokyo again. Ami will probably want to hold onto them first to do research on the magic involved." _

There may have been a muttered crack or two about Ami and Harry researching each other. Harry pretended not to hear it.

_"Cuteness, you won't need one, of course." _

The little pink haired girl pouted. The bracelets were pretty.

Minako stood up. _"Alright, girls. This is Mister Potter's last day in Tokyo! What are we all going to do together before I steal him away for our Big Date?"_

Several girls said Shinjuku. There were also votes for Ginza. Setsuna spoke up. _"I have heard that Bandai is releasing their new Teen Witch action figures today. Shall we take a trip to Ginza and insist on the standard Senshi contract?" _The girls all grinned.

"_So we just go to their corporate headquarters?" _Harry may not be a lawyer, but he didn't think a group of magical girls would be welcome in an office tower.

Minako spoke up, _"No, silly they usually have cool public ceremonies when they open a line based on real people. This way they can openly give the person a chance to endorse the toys."_

"_You mean I'll get a cut?"_

"_I guess you could. We all donate to a charity for families and businesses hurt by monster attacks. This way they don't look too hard to see if the wall was knocked down by the bad guy or by one of us." _

Makoto looked like she may be feeling a little guilt about a wall or two.

Harry was in.

A big crowd was forming at the front doors of Hakuhinkan Toy Park in Ginza. A lot of people came for the pomp of product unveilings. Many others had to be the first person in line to ensure their collections were complete and up to date. Many more were hoping that Teen Witch would appear personally. It was expected to see local Magical Girls and Devil Hunters show up but Heather Snape was a foreigner and odds were not in favor of her attendance. Still, they were hopeful. Her grand entrance had been in the company of four Senshi after all. The magical girl trackers in the crowd were also hoping to ask why Sailor Moon wasn't at the Budokan attack when her closest allies were.

Harry and Pluto had planned things out while the Senshi window shopped the morning away in Ginza. They had to have a properly showy entrance. Magical Girls didn't just walk up to the stage and ask for contracts. No, this had to be done with style.

The music was loud. The crowds were energetic. The PR crew had made the opening sales pitch. The stage was just big enough to do the job. Go.

A few moments before the crowds would be allowed into the store, a huge shaft of multicolored light struck the stage from On High. The crowd went quiet. This was new. As the Sailor Teleport ended, eight magical girls with hands linked appeared on stage. One witch hovered in the center of the circle with the youngest magical girl sitting right behind her. Sure, it was a trick. The broom riders had snuck in first and acted as a target for the teleport. The crowd went wild just the same.

It was official. Teen Witch had associated herself with the Senshi. All the collectors took note.

There was some official pomp and circumstance. There was a written endorsement. Then, it was speech time. Harry spoke of love and justice like the Senshi before her. She thanked the Senshi for inviting her to Japan. When she got to the part about wishing she didn't have to go back, several reporters asked why she had to leave and to where.

"_Well, I'm still in school. I go to a school for magic back in Europe and I've got years more to go."_

"_Miss Snape! While you've been here, Sailor Moon has not made any public appearances. Can you or the Senshi with you tell us where she is?" _One particularly bold reporter yelled out.

"_Um... well..." _Harry did not expect that question. Sailor Hotness to the rescue.

"_Sailor Moon fell into in a magical pool not too long ago. This pool has forced our dear friend into an enchanted sleep not unlike what is common in Western Fairy tales. Miss Snape was invited here because she is uniquely suited to helping us revive Sailor Moon." _

Good one, Hotness. Bandai would probably start putting that on all of the Teen Witch merchandise. They may even make a special edition Sleeping Beauty Sailor Moon.

"_You... you mean that Miss Snape is going to kiss Sailor Moon?" _

Harry blushed hard. A few of the Senshi began giggling. Sailor Hotness to the rescue again.

"_Miss Snape has fallen into the very same pool in the past. Clearly she is awake now. We are working with Miss Snape to determine how to revive Sailor Moon. And, no, a handsome prince did not have to kiss Miss Snape to revive her." _

Thank Merlin for that. And every word was true after a fashion.

It was time for their dramatic exit. Just as they were about to reverse their entrance, Harry heard someone yell out.

"Hey! Blondie!" Harry looked around causing the Senshi to pause.

"Hey, Red!" Ranma and Shampoo were leaping over the crowd. Both touched down on the edge of the stage. "Venus, mind if I visit with these two for a bit before we meet up?"

"_If you don't show up at my place by five, I'll find some way to punish you." _

Harry was tempted to ask how. Venus' discreet wink in his direction gave Harry a lot of ideas to work with.

Eight Senshi teleported out to the delight of thousands as two broom riders and two martial artists left in a chaotic aerial display of speed and agility.

Bandai's Senshi product lines were going to have a good quarter.

* * *

Half an hour later, Ranma, Shampoo, Harry and Cuteness were having lunch together. This was Harry's first gyudon and he was now determined to find some Japanese cookbooks to take back to England with him. Cuteness had her hair charmed black and was trying a triple braid style thanks to the new kanzashi.

They were getting looks from strangers, true, but these were looks that Harry didn't mind. They weren't directed at him. Today, the looks they were getting from strangers were mostly due to Shampoo and Red being the hottest girls on the block.

_"..so I tell the old man to shove his plans up his ass. There is no cure and, by their own reasoning, the Schools will not be 'joined'. I tell ya', Akane looked more relieved than anything else. Her and her sisters had all moved on. It was just the old men and Mom that couldn't see reason."_ Along with the background noise of a weekend lunchtime crowd, speaking English gave them a bit more privacy.

_"Too too true."_ Shampoo said, allowing a trace of her old accent through.

Ranma snickered. Shampoo's eyes narrowed.

_"Sorry, I'll try not to be such a bimbo from now on." _Shampoo said more clearly yet more cooly.

No bimbo might mean no sex. Ranma went quiet. Shampoo smiled in victory.

_"Anyway, we girls had fun watching Ranma prove that the schools did not need joining. Ranma's style is solid no ma__t__ter what official school name he may chose to use. If the Japanese Masters refuse to reco__g__nize him due to his father's idiocy, my Sisters will, as will many other Ch__i__nese Masters. Ranma's past is well known to them."_

Harry was about to comment when Ranma's eyes narrowed and he looked into the cityscape. When Shampoo tensed up, Harry put his hand on his wand.

_"Get Cuteness out of here, Harry.__" _Ranma muttered,_"__P-chan's come to pay his respects."_

Ranma and Shampoo began moving to the front door of the restaurant while Harry began to pull Cuteness the other way. Ki-based combat was still a weak spot for Harry and he wasn't about to risk his daughter when Ranma told him not to.

_"If you don't make it to Hogwarts by Christmas break on the twentieth, I'll see if I can spend the holidays here in Tokyo!" _

Just out of sight of the patrons, Harry dual apparated Cuteness out with him to the Outer's house as large crashes were heard outside. One explosion caused the restaurant to rock.

-pop-

"But Daaaaaaaddyyyyyyyyy! I wanted to watch Ranma beat P-chan flat!" Cuteness was acting her visible age.

"Maybe you can watch a pensive memory of it one day when your life's not in peril." Daddy Harry was not folding.

"Ooookaaaayyyy."

Cuteness was not really okay. Harry paused after experiencing another parenting first. He was actually annoyed at her tone of voice. Harry had to stop himself before starting a 'when I was your age' speech. Noone needed to know what his life was like when he was nine. Father and daughter cuddled on the couch for a little while to let lunch settle before starting to look for the other girls.

Harry and Cuteness didn't find the other girls before five, but they did spend the time together buying toys and playing games and tickling each other until Cuteness nearly wet herself. They headed back to the Outer's house wearing new Senshi T-shirts and Teen Witch hoodies with three bags of random stuff between them. In consideration of his next date, Harry had taken to wearing a classic Sailor V t-shirt. He had also gotten Minako some Cadbury chocolates. To be fair, Harry and Cuteness got chocolates too but those didn't last long. When Haruka, Michiru, Setsuna and Hotaru stepped into the living room, both Harry and Cuteness were napping together due to sugar induced comas. Pictures were taken.

"Wake up, stud. Your next conquest awaits." Harry opened his eyes to see giggling girls in a ring around the couch he and Cuteness were napping on. It was quarter till five. Harry woke up just in time.

He brushed his teeth, ran his hand through his hair, kissed his still napping daughter on the head and apparated out.

-pop-

Ten seconds later he came back for the forgotten box of chocolates.

-pop-

Giggles.

-pop-

* * *

"Andrews."

"Yes, my Lord."

The Death Eater in question bowed before delivering his report. Voldemort nodded for him to proceed.

"Before Potions Master Snape's last round of punishment, he did mention that Hogwarts book lists were due to be delivered Monday morning. We expect a moderate crowd of mostly purebloods and half-bloods in Diagon Alley during the week and the biggest crowd with many mudbloods on Saturday. With your permission, Bella would like to strike Saturday."

"You and Bella have my permission. I think, though, that I shall send a few allies of ours to the Alley early. See to it that you are there Monday afternoon and evening to observe our friends. You can cast Patronus, can't you?"

The Dark Lord smirked and Andrews. He swallowed and nodded. Andrews had in fact cast the charm twice, but never before the intended target.

Andrews waited for dismissal before leaving. Only fools and corpses moved without permission when in the Dark Lord's presence.

* * *

Harry was right on time. Minako smiled at him and pulled him into a quick hug before dragging him down the street. She did not want to lose precious time to a parental inquisition.

"Love the shirt, Harry. Flattery will get you everywhere!" Harry wasn't sure if Minako had gotten the saying wrong on purpose or not.

"Don't forget chocolates. You can't date the patron Senshi of Valentine's Day without chocolates." Minako's smile could light up a city block.

As they walked hand in hand to the subway station, Minako began a lengthy dissertation on what she saw as the real differences between living in England and Japan. While Harry was able to hold his own in that conversation, he became more of a listener than a participant when she then began comparing those two countries to the others she had visited in her well traveled childhood. Harry did some mental calculations to verify that the remainder of the money Hotness gave him would carry them through tonight. That was probably Setsuna's plan from the beginning. She's psychic like that.

Minako must have had a plan in her head or something. They just 'happened' to pass by the 'best' sukiyaki restaurant in Shinjuku. It was a bit on the pricey side but he still had plenty of yen on hand. Where Ami and Harry were careful to focus on one subject and provide intellectual discourse over their evening together, Minako held the high ground with a verbal stick and move technique which always seemed to keep Harry on his toes for the next subject change.

Minako did have a plan in her head. If this hunk was going to going to be Mister Sailor Moon one day, she wanted to know everything about him. Setsuna may let get the truth from her targets through subtlety but Minako favored the social equivalent of strip mining. Sure Harry would feel mentally sore tomorrow morning, but if her plans reached fruition he'd be physically sore as well! She was a girl on a mission and she could smell victory.

As they left the sukiyaki restaurant, Minako asked Harry if he had brought his broom. Sure he did, but wouldn't -

Cold!

Ten minutes later, Sailor Venus was wiping bits of thug off of her gloves. Teen Witch was busy using reparo to re-assemble a crying local girl's torn skirt. Tonight's damsels in distress had been walking home from dinner when some local yakusa wannabe's had scared them into a dead end alley. How typical. While the thugs didn't look like they were after a 'good time' tonight, they clearly weren't above pushing the girls around before robbing them. The hard slap which sent one girl in pink flying into a brick wall caused Venus and Teen Witch to stop sneaking up on them in favor of a bum rush. Most of the thugs got off light with fractures and sprains. The bastard that slapped the girl in pink got a bone breaking curse to the kneecap.

After calming the girls down for a few minutes, Venus had one of them pull out a cell phone and call for police. It was time for the two heroines to scout around for some more fun.

Nabiki Tendo, Tokyo's newest and most effective local events reporter could not believe what she'd just stumbled onto. She and her technical crew had been staking out this neighborhood for two days recording gang activity and looking for corrupt police to expose when they witnessed the three girls get corralled into the alley opposite Nabiki's hidden position. She was just about to place an anonymous call to the police station to judge response times when Sailor Venus and Tokyo's newest foreign exchange heroine, Teen Witch, appeared and went medieval on the gang members. Venus hadn't even resorted to using any of those fancy monster killing attacks or her chain. These two really didn't like seeing those men hitting girls.

_"Video?"_

_"Recording since the girls entered range."_

_"Audio?"_

_"The same." _

This was going to really open up doors for her. Local corruption was easy for her because she knew how it all worked. After all, she had been the numbers running Ice Queen of her own high school, only a step or to below yakusa herself. She could finally say goodbye to her past with a story on magical girls that had vidoe footage to back it up. With this story, she could be the new face of morning news. She and her team tracked the magical vigilantes as they mounted Teen Witch's broom together and floated over to a nearby rooftop.

One hundred and eighty meters away, floating lazily above a four story mixed-occupancy building Harry spoke up.

"_I have to say, Venus. This is not what I expected to be doing tonight when you told me I was taking you on a date." _

Nabiki's sound technician spit coffee all over his equipment. Thank God it was waterproof.

"_The other Senshi don't go out against normal thugs nearly often enough in my opinion. Really, we Senshi are tailor made to defend Tokyo and the rest of Earth from monsters and aliens and stuff like that. It's what Senshi are good at. Still, back when I did my stint in England as Sailor V, I focused more on the common criminal. You know, guys like the ones we just tore up downstairs. I missed going after the petty criminals once I accepted my place with the Senshi here in Tokyo." _

Honest to God magical girl backstory. Nabiki would be shitting gold soon.

"_I'm beginning to wonder why you weren't picked up by Aurors then." _Teen Witch replied to Sailor Venus.

"_Auror's what are those?" _Venus wondered aloud.

'Yeah, Teen Witch. What are those?' Nabiki and her crew wondered silently.

Teen Witch answered. "_Didn't I... sorry. Guess not. Aurors are the magical equivalent of police detectives. They keep the peace and chase down dark wizards for the British Ministry of Magic's Department of Magical Law Enforcement. I thought I wanted to be one until recently." _

Harry's summer had really opened her eyes to how bad off the Wizarding World was about certain issues. Important issues like corruption.

Venus slowly shook her head and continued. "_I don't know why I didn't run into any. Should I have?"_

"_Well, the International Statutes of Secrecy were enacted to keep the non-magical world ignorant of the existence of the magical world. I'm surprised you didn't get picked up and tossed into Azkaban prison for using magic to fight muggle criminals. Well, maybe they couldn't tell you where there as you don't use a wand."_

"_But if this law is international like you say, why don't we get in more trouble with magical policemen here?"_

"_I don't know really. Maybe Japan didn't sign on or something. I swear, if it weren't for that damn prophecy, I'd never..." _ Teen Witch paused and took a deep cleansing breath. _"well... I have to go back. There's no way around it really." _

Teen Witch's story was deeper? Talk girl, talk!

"_Someone sounds like they need a back rub." _Venus cooed.

"_I thought you liked blokes." _Teen Witch asked in amusement.

'Then why did you go on a date with her?' Nabiki had seen this kind of issue before. 'I wonder..'

"_That's what hot water is for, isn't it?" _Venus prodded.

Jusenkyo! That's right, Ranma actually interrupted the end of Bandai's lunchtime ceremony to talk to Teen Witch! She's a boy! Nabiki held back a laugh as she imagined what this would do to Teen Witch's fan base.

Teen Witch answered Venus' challenge. "_Where are you going to give me this back rub, then? You live with your parents and I'm rooming with four of your own teammates. That may not stop Neptune and Uranus, but do you want to answer questions from a twelve year old and a nine year old?"_

There have always been rumors about the two outer Senshi but this would add a lot of fuel to the fire.

"_I know just where to go. Let's touch down and change." _Jackpot!

Venus and Teen Witch set down between some roof top mechanical units. Damn! They're behind cover! An orange flash of light flared behind the machines.

"_Think hard about where you want to go. Concentrate on the details. I'll pull the memory from your mind to mine." _That was a young man's voice alright. _"What kind of place is that?"_

"_You're about to find out."_

-pop-

'What was that noise?' Nabiki and her team sat in position for ten more minutes waiting for any more noises from the roof. Nothing. They shifted gears and began to follow up on the girls being tended to by police and medical personnel four floors down.

She couldn't break the whole story yet. She had research to do. They'd report the magical rescue for the morning news and hunt down leads for the rest of it later. She might even let slip the audio hinting at rampant lesbianism within the Senshi ranks. For the rest, Nabiki really needed to talk to Ranma. If he could get her Teen Witch's real story, she'd fuck Ranma cross-eyed. A whole magical world hidden from non-magical people? For proof of that, she'd fuck both Ranma and Shampoo on film.

* * *

August 19th, 1996

Harry woke up alone. Well, at least he didn't need a shower. Usagi would be so disappointed. Harry took care of bathing last night at the love hotel. If Harry knew how to whistle, he'd be doing it all morning long. He stepped into the hallway only to find himself face to face with Hotness.

"_No, I did not get her a book. Yes I sat on her face." _Hotness remained silent. _"Get Mina all hot and bothered and the whole 'men only' rule flies out the window."_

Hotness looked over Harry's shoulder. Harry turned around.

"_Good morning, Usagi." _Usagi looked shocked and confused. _"I'm sorry, Usagi. From now on, I promise not look like you while having sex with one of your close friends without asking permission first. Okay?"_

"_Mina a-actually did that with you l-looking like meee?" _Harry and Hotness both nodded. _"I h-had no idea she'd even consider it. You know, Mina and Makoto have had sleepovers together without the rest of us before. I'm beginning to wonder how much of that time really is spent talking about boys." _

Usagi tried to beat her head against the wall but fell through instead.

"_I think it was a 'heat of the moment' kind of thing." _

This translation ring was really going to help his relationship with Usagi advance by leaps and bounds... unless of course it helped him put his foot in his mouth faster. Harry supposed it was a double edged blade.

Hotness decided to push the conversation along. _"You and Mina have a unique idea of foreplay." _

Harry's blank look said everything about comprehension.

_"A video crew actually caught you and Venus roughing up those gang members last night and fixing that girl's dress."_

"_They got that on film?"_

"_Yes." _Bloody hell.

"_More than that?"_

"_Don't let it interfere with the last day you get with your daughter for some time. I've got a doctor's note lined up for her already." _Hotness was not helping manage Harry's stress levels at all.

"_That's not a no."_

"_Go down to breakfast. Today will be a very long day for you. We can conspire to reveal the Wizarding World over Christmas Break." _

On the plus side, she remembered the time difference between Japan and Britain when Minako forgot all about it. On the minus side, _what?_

"_I'm revealing the Wizarding World for Christmas?!"_

"_I said 'conspire to'. Go have breakfast."_

Cuteness, Usagi and Harry saw the others off after breakfast and then headed for the nearest amusement park and then McDonald's. Harry's first McDonald's meal. The food was smaller than he thought it would be. Must be due to Japanese serving sizes. The rather unique family then saw a big screen double feature with My Neighbor Totoro and Kiki's Delivery Service. If Cuteness didn't already have the perfect nickname, Harry would have started calling her Kiki.

Long before any of the three were ready, it was time for Harry to leave. It was mid morning in Diagon Alley and Harry needed to sneak back into England. Cuteness helped her Daddy pack in silence. Usagi promised she would see both Harry and Cuteness every day. Harry promised that he would do anything he could to see his Little

Girl. All too soon, Harry and Sailor Pluto stood in the middle of the living room. Harry was going girl, hair and eyes to match her daughter. British observers may mistake her for Auror Tonks at first. That would work.

Harry had shared hugs and farewell wishes with Haruka, Michiru and Hotaru before looking again to Cuteness. She pulled out one of her last unused Jusenkyo treasures.

"_I figured out how to use this." _Harry said.

It was the jeweled broach Matriarch Cologne had told her could store emotions.

"_This broach stores the emotions you want to feel later. All this past week, I've been filling these jewels with how I feel about you." _

She pinned the broach in place as close to Cuteness's neck as she could get on her T-shirt. When it was in place, the jewels began to emit a soft pink glow. A rain of little tears fell as Cuteness felt exactly how much her Daddy loved her. She slammed into Harry and the two cried together for a few minutes until Pluto gently pulled them apart.

Still shedding tears, Harry looked to Usagi.

_"Ready?" _

Usagi nodded before turning to her daughter.

"_I'll be back in time to read you a bedtime story, Love. I have to go with your Daddy now, okay?" _Cuteness spun around and sprinted back to her room where she would spend most of the evening wearing Harry's broach and crying.

Before she could run up to Cuteness and spend all night crying with her, Harry pulled the hood of her cloak up and placed an hand on Pluto's Garnet Rod. Before any of the other three Senshi could blink, Harry and Pluto blinked out of existence. Usagi bowed to others one last time even if they couldn't see her before disappearing for her own trip to England.

**End Chapter**

Authors Notes:

Miyako and Ehara-sensei are from Homeroom Affairs. They are not original characters. Asside from the getting saved by Teen Witch bit, the first part of that scene comes right from the anime.

It occurs to me that in this chapter, Harry gets lucky twice in three days with girls he has known for only one week. If any of you believe that Ami and/or Minako would not work that quickly on Cuteness's dad, then feel free to rewrite those scenes in your head. Even if there were no 'happy endings', Harry would still become much closer to those two after the dates. I came close to writing the chapter with Harry not getting any, but decided that Harry needed a break and that both girls could use some tender loving. Harry is not the scoundrel that Mamoru could/would be in the same situation. Just in case I don't actually have to further defend myself on this point, I'll leave the 6000 word essay on why Ami needs good lovin' for another day.

And now a short word from our sponsors - Spaceballs 2: The Search For More Money

**Omake – A Tribute to Spaceballs**

The assembled nobles and delegates from Earth and the newly christened Crystal Millenium stood in silence. They had just witnessed what may be recorded in history books as the Moon Queen's worst failure. The silver tressed Queen lay shattered and hopeless at the foot of the alter which was supposed to support the King after his glorious return to life. But the altar supported nothing now save for Serenity's own tears.

Duchess Lovegood and Princess Mercury both went to gently lift their grieving friend and carry her out of public chambers so that she could suffer in private with her closest companions.

As the remaining nobles and delegates excused themselves to prepare condolences for the Queen, Duchess Granger stayed behind to ensure that the Crown Princess would not go without companionship. In Serenity's grief at failing to revive her husband, she had completely forgot about her own daughter. Behind Hermione, two concerned ghosts looked on as Cuteness grabbed the Scepter of Prissiness and began to look over its details, pulling it to within an inch of her face at times to look at the various jeweled facets and crystal curves.

Finally, holding it in one closed fist, she brought the heavy ruby pommel down against the tear stained alter twice before looking intently into it's crystal depths one last time. Floating through the middle of the prismatic crystal shaft, Cuteness clearly saw the words 'Out of Order'.

"Out of Order? Fuck! Even in the future, nothing works!"

**End Omake**

REV 08/2012


	12. The Goddess of Diagon Alley

**Chapter Twelve: The Goddess of Diagon Alley**

August 19th, 1996

Harry tried to get her emotions back under control. It wasn't working. It was really only a few days ago that she found out she had a daughter. Granted, said daughter was visiting from the future and had yet to be conceived but she was still very real and Harry found herself loving the girl more than she had ever loved anything ever. And now there was almost a whole planet between Harry and her adorably cute pink haired daughter. Maybe she had been crying like a girl for the last fifteen minutes but Setsuna and Usagi were both being very kind and had not just left Harry to her own devices.

The two were sharing tea in a small family owned restaurant on Charing Cross Road not two blocks from the Leaky Cauldron. The restaurant itself didn't look to be doing too well, so it fit Harry's mood perfectly. No doubt the new McDonald's next door was hurting business.

"_This is where you tell me to man up and quit crying like a girl." _Harry tried to smile. She failed.

Setsuna put her hand on Harry's as she answered. "_You just showed proof of manhood. All girls know that crying can heal the pain you feel. It makes you stronger. Guys get the same release by hitting things which is not always good if you hit the wrong things." _

For Usagi, watching Harry cry for Cuteness was the most wonderful thing ever. She had been crying her own spectral tears right along with the boy-turned-girl. In the back of her mind, Usagi was closely looking over the transformed wizard. Harry now bore a close resemblance to Black Lady, Cutness's grown-up evil persona from that incident with the Black Moon Clan. Perhaps one day in the future they could use this resemblance to prank the other Senshi and scare the shit out of them.

After ten more minutes of sniffles, Harry cheated and cast a cheering charm on herself. She briefly remembered that English would work just fine here. Except... how many other patrons could listen in if she kept going in Japanese?

"_Setsuna, I was able to get Ami's help on magical detection for you Senshi, but I have another problem that I haven't got a solution to." _

Any day now, Harry was going to find herself face to face with Albus Dumbledore. The Headmaster and his Potions Bitch were both master Legillimencers and Harry was no closer to being an Occlumens now than the last time Snivellus mind raped her. Fine, him at the time.

_"I still have no idea how to keep Dumbledore from reading my mind. I didn't learn to defend my mind over the summer."_

Sutsuna considered Harry for a moment before answering. "_The answer may be easier than you think."_

Setsuna smirked. Harry immediately felt hope.

_"Tell me, Harry, how does his mind reading trick work?"_

Harry hardly had to think about the answer. "_Through the eyes. I could refuse to look him in the eye, but what if he demands I look at him or he catches me off guard? He can't learn about Cuteness." _

Harry was beginning to understand the price she will have to pay for two weeks of happiness away from being the Boy-Who-Suffers.

Setsuna took a moment to survey the crowd. "_You are forgetting your non-magical root's Harry. Tell me what color eyes that girl at the front counter has."_

"_I can't. She's wearing... OH! Sunglasses! Could it really be that easy? Wouldn't I have to always wear them?" _

If only he could get that to work. Occlumency avoided for a hundred pounds or so would be brilliant. She still had that much on her.

"_Before you head on to Diagon Alley, consider the optometrist across the street. You could get prescription sunglasses or you could get contacts and some more stylish lenses. Does anyone in the Wizarding World wear Ray-Ban's?" _

Contacts? Brilliant! Harry could tell most wizards that she'd had her eyes fixed and they wouldn't know the difference. _"_

_You may also find something better on the other side of that magical pub, but you now have what you need for this to work."_

"_That could really work. Maybe if I learn the anti-summoning charm... er, thanks Setsuna."_

Usagi really wanted to see Harry wearing contacts. When she wasn't looking down in those shared morning showers, she was looking into his eyes. They begged to be gazed into. Even better, they were much more prominent now that the icky cut on his head had healed some. The scar was still there, but it has faded into a line that was easy to ignore in the past two weeks.

Harry and Setsuna went their separate ways. Harry quietly talked to Usagi about a few things until her tea went cold. Shortly before noon, Harry walked into the Leaky Cauldron wearing contacts behind a pair of sunglasses that were of the plastic framed sporty variety. Oakleys, the tag said. The frame was actually quite close to killing curse green and sported silver hardware. They were practically Slytherin, but she stuck with them. She would need to be a bit more cunning and ambitiousness if she wanted to win against the opponents lined up against her. She also had a new backup set of glasses in her pocket next to her shrunken trunk.

Harry was quite hungry for some fish and chips right about now but she was determined to get in and out of Diagon as quick as possible today. She quickly stepped up to the brick entry and tapped the right bricks to gain entry. The bricks parted in the same seemingly chaotic pattern as they always had. That little show would never get old.

Harry had a very tense four minute walk down Diagon Alley. There were people but not as many as before. They were also not as happy or open as before. Everyone was either agitated or afraid or both. She walked without looking around much. Harry tried hard to be no one in particular who just happened to have a ghost following them everywhere. 'Mental note: Usagi shouldn't stay quite so close in public anymore. They could see her here. A ghost in muggle clothes was bound to draw attention.

It did draw attention. Luckily, the Auror on duty just looked at the pretty young woman with the muggle-ish looking spectacles and the hidden Death Eater simply noted that a young witch with pink hair was closely followed by a girl ghost. They both noted the girl and ghost entering Gringotts.

The Wizarding Bank seemed to be where the real activity was. There were as many wizards and witches inside Gringotts as there were outside at the moment. They also seemed less tense. Maybe the subtle assurance that violence would not be tolerated by wizarding kind within the Goblin stronghold gave people hope that Death Eaters would not actually enter the bank. Random suffering and terror was not worth a Death Eater's life, unless of course their Lord commanded otherwise.

"Name?" The goblins were as cheerful as ever. With few exceptions, the bank staff always appeared to be ready to begin the next Goblin-Wizard War at a moment's notice. This more than anything else kept most wizards from trying to cheat the bank out of a knut or two.

"I'd rather not say. This is my key," Harry slid her trust vault key over, "and I'd like to visit my vault."

Harry watched as the teller eyed the key and then her sharply. Without knowing how they did it, Harry was sure that the teller must know who the key is supposed to belong to. "If you have a private room, I am willing to prove I am who I claim to be." The goblin appeared to take in her statement for a moment and nodded.

"Follow." As he stepped down from his teller station, he nodded to a companion. Soon, another goblin was handling the teller station and Harry was being escorted to a door adjacent to some cart tracks. Usagi continued to follow Harry to the amusement of anyone paying attention.

Who kept pet ghosts? Honestly.

Clearly, after this bank trip Usagi would have to be much more discrete. As they passed through the door, Harry could feel a heavy blanket of some form of magic buzzing across her skin. Several more armed goblins waited for her inside. This must be some kind of magic hardened security office then. In the middle of that revelation, a steel blade was brought close enough to her neck to shave with.

"State your name witch!" Harry stayed calm and willed herself to look as harmless as she could.

"I am Harry James Potter. I -" Three goblins started arguing in Gobbledygook. As Harry was still wearing the translator ring, she could follow their argument about not being able to lie in this room versus the truth of blood. She switched to their language. _"I apologize for the confusion, honorable goblins. I am cursed to wear the body of another until the proper trigger is used. Have I your permission to draw my wand and undo the magic?"_

It was rare for any human to learn the goblin language. It was unheard of for one her apparent age to do so. The guards began to inspect her possessions for enchantments. Harry divined their concerns.

"_The smaller ring translates languages for me. The jeweled one detects potions and poisons. My wands are in cloak pockets and my other possessions are shrunk into my right pant pocket. The scepter at my waist acts like a wand as well." _

She held her hands out and open, palms up. Harry was beginning to think that there was more to the room's magic than truth spells. She could almost feel the need to tell them all her secrets. All they had to do was ask the right questions. Some charm version of veritaserum that also makes you obedient or submissive? If only Harry could have gotten Malfoy into this room last year before Sirius died.

A second blade crossed the first at her neck. _"Use your magic, human. If you prove your claims, we will apologize. If not, there will be __**two**__ ghosts in this room."_

Harry slowly drew a wand and magically loosened her Sailor Mercury T-shirt and pants a bit. Her shoes still held the stretching charm on them that she had placed back in the valley. She then transfigured a nearby inkwell into a bowl of warm water. She returned her wand to it's resting place and placed her fingers in the bowl.

"_Do my words and blood now agree?" _Harry could tell that the goblins were surprised. They must not know about the cursed pools of Jusenkyo.

"_You have our apologies." _The goblins had pulled their blades from his neck and appeared to return to the attitude of tellers and bank managers that most magicals see. Only one remained in the security room with Harry and Usagi.

"_Your devotion to bank safety is appreciated, Sir."_

"_There is more to it than that, Mister Potter." _The goblin looked to Usagi for a moment. _"Is... she trustworthy?" _

Harry nodded. The goblin switched back to English. "Mister Potter, I am Gobsmack. I hold the position of security manager at this branch of Gringotts and I must inform you that there were unauthorized attempts to access your account in your absence. Also, an attempt to force a Betrothal Contract was made by Albus Dumbledore. We froze all of your assets until you could come in to clear up who may be granted access and who may not."

A tea service appeared on the desk next to Harry's warm water bowl. Harry took a drink, not bothering to check his ring. Even had he seen the jewel change color, he was too worked up to care. Several rolls of parchment appeared on the desk after both Harry and Gobsmack had emptied two cups. Harry's tea _was_ laced with a Calming Draught, but he needed it.

Over the next hour, Gobsmack informed Harry Potter of his status according to the goblins. He was quite well off, but the Potter accounts were not what they should have been. Dumbledore had been siphoning off large quantities of Potter galleons citing his position as Magical Guardian. While there was nothing the goblins could do about the sizable fortune that Dumbledore walked away with, they could begin recalling Potter heirlooms. Dumbledore took many Potter treasures, but was not allowed to claim them as his own. The Sword of Gryffindor was actually a family heirloom! Brilliant!

"Mister Gobsmack. Does this mean I'm the Heir of Gryffindor?"

There was more than a little bit of hope in the boys voice. Gobsmack only laughed. His harsh braying caused Usagi to wake up. As Gobsmack and Harry had not been speaking in Japanese, she was left with little to do other than count ceiling panel cracks. Thirty-one. She had even mentally sorted them by length and shape.

"There are many who claim to be heirs, but the lines died out long ago." Harry would have reacted more if not for the calming draught. As it was, he blinked twice and tried to counter the goblin's statement based on his own experience.

"But Tom Riddle was the Heir of Slytherin. It's how he got into the Chamber of Secrets." Harry thought this was a good argument. Gobsmack merely smirked that big toothy smirk of the goblins.

"If you had made it into the Chamber first, the snake would have followed you. You think a Basilisk won't be loyal to the first speaker to wake it in centuries? You need more instruction in magical creature habits. But that is beside the point. You know how corrupt the Ministry of Magic is, don't you? Wave enough galleons in front of the right face and you can be related to anyone at all. Hand over but a small part of your worth to me right now and the Ministry will be touting you as the official heir of all four Founders tomorrow. No one will believe it as the claim's been made before. Well, this is YOU we are talking about. They may believe it this time. This is why we at Gringotts keep separate records for all of our clients. No Ministry clerk will tell me who gets what upon a client's death."

"So, the sword will come back to me. And 'his' Potter family pensive and half a dozen other things. How hard will it be to get the things back from him?" Harry didn't think the Headmaster was in a mood to play nice.

"Gringotts will submit a claim in writing tomorrow assuming you sign the claim in front of you..." Harry immediately did just that, "but resistance on his part may take up to a month to counter. Protocol must be followed before magic can be called into play. Either way, you will have your possessions by mid-October. Now, on to the Black Will."

Potioned as Harry was, he still flinched on hearing this. Usagi floated down from her games and placed her hand in his. Literally. The cool feeling had become a comfort since their almost date at the top of Tokyo Tower.

"Can you spare me the details, please? What did he leave me, if anything?" Harry once had so much hope for the future with Sirius. That was gone, but now he had more than just hope with Cuteness as living, breathing proof of a happy ending. This summer would be both the worst and best on record at the same time.

"He did try to make you his adopted heir and the new Lord Black, but Family Law prevented that. Instead, he gave you everything he could just short of the title. The full Black family fortune has been moved to a new vault and all properties owned by the Blacks were sold to the Potter Trust for one knut."

Gobsmack pushed a ledger towards Harry and pointed to a number.

"That's in pounds?" That was a very big number. Harry being Harry, he refused to acknowledge or remember the number for fear of becoming more Malfoy-like.

"Don't be silly. Galleons. Our official exchange rate is five to one. Sirius has recouped your Potter losses several times over. You have title to a home in London under the Fidelius charm and two unplottable locations which we are unable to describe to you due to current defensive ward schemes. You will be given parchments on how to claim them. It is also known that the Fidelius was placed by Albus Dumbledore. If you request, Gringotts can assist you in breaking the charm and then recast it under your control." Harry nodded. He did not want Albus just walking into his properties anytime the old man felt like it.

After dealing with the associated parchments and money transfers, Gobsmack placed a new pile of scrolls on the table. "These are Betrothal Contracts."

Harry went white. "Relax, Mister Potter. Have some more tea if you want."

Harry brought his breathing under control, but refused the tea. He wanted to be able to think clearly when leaving the bank.

"Who are they for and how can I get around them?" Harry knew there must be a way around them. Cuteness wouldn't exist if Harry could be forced to take an English wife. Harry didn't even bother thinking about polygamy.

"Only two out of nine have been countersigned by former Lords of the Ancient and Noble House of Potter. One is three centuries old and would join you to a member of the Lovegood family." Wow. "You may pass it on as your ancestors have or present it to Miss Luna Lovegood for fulfillment. It is your choice as she has no say in the matter."

Harry cared for Luna but there would be no wedding bells. Usagi was interested in the conversation now. She truly cursed her limited grasp of English. Harry looked to her panicky face.

"_Usagi, I swear I will not entertain thoughts of fulfilling any of these marriage contracts as long as we are together. Cuteness is pretty good proof of my fidelity, don't you think?" _The ghost did look relieved and she started running her hand up and down through Harry's arm. That tickled.

Gobsmack was intrigued by this display of warmth between wizard and ghost. There would be new betting pools in the bowels of Gringotts tonight. "The second countersigned contract is suspect. We detect a slight trace of imperious or similar magic in the signature of James Potter, your father. The contract is to any female born to the Snape line. The right of enforcement lies with the Snapes in this agreement."

If Harry had been drinking, he would have just spit it all out onto Gobsmack. 'They might try to wed me to Heather!' Harry burst out laughing.

"There was the attempt recently to get you betrothed to Severus Snape, but that was too obvious a forgery for us to even bother with." Harry sobered up right quick with that admission. He didn't want to have to deal with Betrothal Contracts if he could avoid it. He knew who he would marry already. Wait just a minute... He DID know who he was going to marry. That's it!

"_Usagi! I know we're kind of doing things out of order here, but if I have a Betrothal Agreement drawn up, will you sign it?" _Usagi's eyes widened to Luna-esque proportions. Then she began to tear up. Unable to say anything at the moment, she nodded vigorously. Usagi couldn't wait to tell her daughter in the morning.

"Mister Gobsmack, you mentioned that my blood was not recognized as Potter blood when I entered. Would you allow me to return to female form and give my companion time to claim her blood and my future?"

Gobsmack agreed. This was unique in all of his ninety-four years at Gringotts. In short order, Harry and Gobsmack had drafted a new Betrothal Contract. The agreement was keyed to be active upon their First Kiss. The goblin brought out the Seal of Gringotts in preparation.

"Have the two of you considered how to sign?" Confusion was written over the faces of boy and ghost. "While still a minor, Mister Potter, you are the Lord of an Ancient and Noble House. As the saying goes 'The King is dead, long live the King'."

After a moment of thought, Harry's eybrows shot up as high as they could go. He turned to Usagi.

"_Usagi. Why do the other Senshi consider you a Princess? Why are you not a Queen?" _Harry wanted to ask Hotness if she's been holding Usagi back at all. Maybe she couldn't be a Queen if her Kingdom is dead or something?

"_I.. I don't know. In the Silver Millennium, mother was the Queen of the Moon and I was the Princess, her only daughter. I will need to get Cuteness to talk to Pluto. That is if Pluto hasn't gone back into hiding now that we're not in Japan." _Pluto seemed to have a few things on her plate when they left Tokyo.

"_Think about how you want to sign. We don't want a copy of this going to Tokyo with 'Usagi Tsukino' on it." _Not that he ignored the importance of being Lord Potter, but Harry still vastly underestimated the significance of this document and the effect it's official copies would have outside of the walls of Gringotts.

After staring at his father's possibly coerced signature for reference, Harry signed the parchment as Lord Harry James Potter of the Ancient and Noble House of Potter. He then asked for and received permission to cast magic in the room. As soon as he dipped his hand into the cold water bowl, Usagi stepped into her body for the forth time this month. A golden crescent moon appeared on the girl's forehead just as it had every time before. Gobsmack was... well... shocked when he realized that the wizard before him had just agreed to wed a ghost. These two didn't act like it was a prank of some sort either. Mister Potter truly asked that girl to marry him. He could do no less in this heavily enchanted room. Subject to the same truth enchantments, what Usagi wrote was also her true title. First in proper kanji and kana, and then as an English subscript, she signed: Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon.

Gobsmack signed as witness and finalized the agreement with the Seal of Gringotts. Wizards may choose to ignore this seal to their own ends, but if Harry ever figured out how to get a snog out of that girl, they would be as good as married by goblin law.

Gobsmack immediately sent it out for official copies to be registered and stored per protocol. While he did this, Usagi left Harry's body. Finally, Gobsmack handed Harry a sickle charmed to act as a portkey target for goblins. It would bypass Fidelius charms as the portkey did not need to know where it was going, it just linked to the target. Gringotts would have a ward breaking/building and security team on location in ten minutes or less after the target was activated. He and Harry agreed that today's business was concluded, though Harry was welcome to come in for new business any time he or she could make it.

It was mid-afternoon when a pink haired red eyed Harry next set foot in the Gringotts lobby. She and Usagi had been escorted to the Potter trust vault by another goblin, who saw to it that Lord Potter was not disturbed during her trip. Gringotts knew well who among their staff had ties to the light and/or the dark and kept both groups well clear of Harry. It wouldn't do to trouble the most interesting wizard to enter their bank since Benjamin Franklin asked if they wanted to invest in an overseas location. Gringotts upper management still devoted one day a year to beating themselves up over refusing the spectacular offer.

As Harry crossed to the main doors, a family of four quickly burst into the bank. They looked to be purebloods in dress if not in attitude. The parents and both Hogwarts aged girls were shaking and clearly frightened out of their minds. Tears began to fall from the mother's eyes and the father blurted out, "Dementors! Diagon Alley is full of dementors!"

As armed security goblins began to pour into the lobby to close the main doors, Harry ran through the doors and into the cold influence of dark fiends. Harry began to hear the edge of her mother's frantic cries in the back of her head. Next to her, Usagi was vibrating in rage. This was a Senshi nightmare, hundreds of innocent people caught out in the open as a nearly equal number of terror inducing things sought to eat their souls. She scanned what was quickly becoming Hell on Earth. Dementors had flooded this block as well as the next down in either direction. Six to eight patroni were leaping and hopping around the street, but they did little good. There were so many dementors that Harry could not even identify what shape the patroni took beyond the dark mass. Had she been able to identity the twinkling lights, she would have noticed a familiar otter and horse fighting a losing battle fifty meters down the alley. Harry and Usagi had both come to the same mental conclusion at the same time, 'I will not tolerate this!'

As Harry brought the Scepter of Prissiness before her, several cold gliding forms began to advance up the steps of Gringotts to their food. One actually aimed for Usagi, unsure if such a being was food or not. Harry pushed through the pain and misery of dementor auras to find her motivation. Mother, Father, Hedwig, Ginny, Luna, Hermione, Ami, Minako, Usagi, Cuteness. Cuteness crying. Cuteness smiling. Cuteness kissing his face as he pretended to be asleep. Harry focused on all the love she could draw into her heart.

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

Even before the first syllable left Harry's mouth, the Scepter of Prissiness began to glow. Dementors were backing away before the second word was done. Then there was a flash. This was not the flash of a lumos spell or of a muggle camera, this was the kind of flash recorded in nineteen fifties military footage of nuclear test detonations. For a brief moment in time, Diagon Alley was lit up brighter than any living wizard or witch had ever seen or ever would see.

When the flash receded, Harry and Usagi looked down the Alley to see a terrific slaughter. Not unlike at Jusenkyo, a full patronus herd had been summoned into the midst of their natural enemy. Stags and does wasted no time before heading into a violent charge. Harry began to stalk down the Alley towards the nearest soulless human body. She didn't like how small it was. As she and Usagi came closer, they saw that a pair of glowing white stags had pinned a dementor against the nearest wall leaving it unable to escape. Right behind it, three glass windows were full of wizards and witches gaping in awe as a witch and her ghost companion almost effortlessly crushed the infestation of demonic beings.

Harry looks down to witness exactly what she didn't want to see. The witch was little, perhaps a year or two younger than Cuteness. Her soft honey blonde hair spread through the alley cobblestones and was soaking up mud and grime from the street. Her greenish blue eyes were open and empty. Her soul was already taken. Usagi and Harry were both livid.

"_You filth! It should be your own darkness swallowed up and gone from our world! You __**will **__bring this girl back! I have not worked many hard years in my home against __**things **__like you to allow you grazing rights in England! __**GIVE HER BACK NOW**__!"_

The people on the other side of the window didn't understand the ghost girl's words but her emotion was pouring through in no uncertain terms. These two not only beat the dementors, they were screaming threats at the dark beasts. The pink haired witch seemed to ask the ghost a question. This snapped the ghost out of her frenzy enough for the question to be answered with some words and hand movements. Harry wasn't Sailor Moon but she had the right body and she had the right weapon for the job. Harry looked into the eyes of her patroni who seemed able to take orders from their Creator. They dragged the dementor into the center of the street.

There were a few other dementors similarly trapped. They were the ones who had just fed or were about to feed. Bodies lay on the ground without moving. A handful of nearly kissed wizards and witches struggled to reach the nearest shelter. One red headed witch mourned over the body of her Kissed companion. Up and down the length of the alley, the trapped dementors were loosely guided into a straight line by Diagon Alley's new guardian herd.

As dozens of scared magicals watched through glass, and a few watched from hidden rooftop locations, Harry once again held the Scepter of Prissiness aloft. This time she pointed it like a sword towards the ranks of frantic dementors. Harry drew back and then stepped into an exaggerated sword lunge while casting a spell never before uttered on British soil.

"MOON GORGEOUS MEDITATION!" For the second time in as many minutes, a spectacular flash poured through Diagon Alley. This attack manifested itself as if a high yield energy beam weapon had been mated to a kaleidoscope at some black box defense industry weapons lab. Every dementor in line appeared to shatter into glass shards before being removed from this plane of existence.

In a handful of locations down the line, small glowing orbs could be seen floating an inch or two above the alley cobblestones. Souls. Harry began to collect the souls and, upon getting a feel for each one, putting them back. Out of nine souls she could return, Harry and Usagi were both relieved to count the little blonde as survivor number six.

Harry picked up the last soul she could find and allowed it's identity to be felt. Harry's eyes flew open, she jerked her head around to the mourning redhead. It was Ginny. The soul was Hermione's! Harry gently began to close the distance between soul and container for one of the most important people in her life since first boarding the Hogwarts Express. Harry didn't stop gazing into the glowing mists that was Hermione for one moment. It seemed to take forever for her to cover the four or five meters between soul and body before she could kneel down and see open mouth and dull eyes of... 'Focus! Put her back. Do Not Fuck This Up.' Harry slowly moved the glowing sphere that contained such a precious thing over Hermione's mouth. She was close enough. When the glowing sphere was released, it slowly dropped back into her throat. Harry began to silently beg any God or Goddess listening to let the bushy haired witch wake up. Ten seconds later, she did. 'She could fall apart later; get these girls out of danger first.' As Harry and Usagi watched two close friends begin to recover on the ground, someone began to speak behind her.

"Many thanks to you Young Miss. But the Alley is still dangerous and after such a spectacular showing you must be very tired. Perhaps you will consent to traveling with me and my companions to a much safer location?"

Albus Dumbledore had come to a fight, but only after it was over. His much vaunted skills were useless now that the Bad Things just got spanked by a girl. Harry wiped her tears away, put her new Oakleys back on and turned to see who Albus had come with.

McGonagall, Lupin, Tonks and three others. Most likely the best patronus casters who could be collected on short notice. People were beginning to come out of the stores and businesses to openly gape at the Goddess come among mortals. No doubt the Headmaster would ensure that all of England associated him with her success.

The prat, he didn't do shite today.

"_Usagi, dear." _Harry began._ "These two girls are two of my closest friends. They alone managed to send me letters in Japan. I came too close to losing them for my liking. I think we should take them with us to our new home. Please follow me." _

Harry was willing to bet that Dumbledore had never spent time learning Japanese. It was a risk to be sure but she was right this time. She saw him frown as her reply passed right by him. Doubly vexed, he could not see her eyes to establish contact. Damned muggle contraptions, a real witch would have worn a tasteful hat and left her eyes unguarded.

As she turned around to place hands on the two unsteady Gryffindors, the Headmaster decided that being more forceful may be necessary. He nodded to two of the unknown order members who came up to 'assist' their new ally. It was for the Greater Good after all. She didn't understand how dangerous the forces of the dark could be and who best to place trust in.

Though standing, Ginny and Hermione were still in a bit of a daze when the pink haired girl grabbed them both and

-pop-

Usagi turned to the assembled wizards and witches. She had just seen the most wonderful proof that she and Harry were destined to be together. Usagi had so much to tell Cuteness! With a blown raspberry and a pair of two fingered salutes, she blinked out of the alley.

The Order members were shocked beyond words. No one in modern history had ever intentionally ignored Albus Dumbledore. No sentient short of Voldemort had publicly insulted him to his face. While there were too many witnesses to claim that this pink haired witch didn't recover their souls first, Miss Granger and Miss Weasley were clearly taken by the witch for purposes unknown. How unfortunate. Those two witches were far too important to Mister Potter to be outside of the Headmaster's influence. Missing posters and a Prophet article focusing on their abduction rather than their survival must be organized.

Albus was just about to make another connection when Tonks beat him to it. "Her! It was her!"

"What do you mean, Miss Tonks?" McGonagall had not paid enough attention to the strange witch's face after being fascinated by the odd muggle glasses she wore. Really. How did she see through them? There was also that odd glowing tattoo that both witch and ghost had. Why put a crescent moon on her forehead like that? Didn't she want to attract a husband?

"The girl from China who hooked up with Harry! That was Heather Snape!" Tonks was ecstatic. If Heather was in London then...

"Harry's back in London?!" Lupin was able to connect those dots too. He looked away from the group to block anyone from seeing his concerned reaction. If the girls were right, then Harry Potter just saved Magical Britain from disaster AGAIN right under the Headmaster's nose. And he learned Japanese in record time. And he could apparate now. Triple apparate with no warning and little noise. They still didn't know what Harry actually did to save the day a few minutes ago either. Perhaps the headmaster would be too preoccupied with collecting witness accounts to try tracking 'Heather' down. Remus would pay close attention to Albus and his actions until he could prove to himself that Harry was right on all counts.

Albus Dumbledore was very preoccupied. He had good cause to believe the boy was here in London which canceled the oath he had taken. There was also Heather Snape. She was a thorn in his side as far as maintaining the secrecy and safety of the whole of the Wizarding World. She had come within range of his Order of the Phoenix along with Harry. Just as important, Heather Snape had a facial tattoo just like the magical girls he had the misfortune of dueling in Tokyo. The girl had genetic value far beyond being a Snape. Albus had a new Plan B.

If Severus could not win Potter's heart, Dumbledore could enforce the earlier Betrothal Contract with James agreeing to a daughter of Severus. Potter would still die for the Greater Good leaving the newly minted Lady Potter to tie up the loyalty of a traditionally dark family like the Malfoys. Even if Harry managed to get the girl pregnant, the Potter heir could be quietly placed in an orphanage to minimize the risk of a Potter growing up with Draco's own heir. Two magically advanced heirs to Lordships _and _the exotic heritage of a 'mahou shoujo' mother. Wonderful. Albus loved being the Hogwarts Headmaster. Controlling the next generation of Magical Britain was just too much power to throw away for worthless titles like Minister for Magic.

Even so, plan B was still not quite as good a plan as Severus and Harry bonding to defeat Tom. With Plan B, Albus may have to buy enough time for yet another Potter to grow up amidst hardship and pain before learning the meaning of love and sacrifice as only Albus Dumbledore could teach.

Back at the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts, monitors for 12 Grimmauld Place began reacting to new activity. Harry and his two dazed and confused passengers appeared on the front porch of 12 Grimmauld Place with a soft

-pop-

"I.. I've been here before. Owwww... my head..." Neither Ginny nor the still silent Hermione were quite up to snuff yet. Just as well, really.

"Dobby!"

POP

"Yes Harry Pott- Potter Miss?" He was confused, but close enough for government work.

"Yes, Dobby. It's me 'Harry Potter Sir'. Big secret though! Don't go spreading it around!" Harry had a serious face on to try and get the point across. Usagi appeared next to Harry. "How would you like a job with me? Permanent and full-time?"

The house elf nearly wet himself in ecstasy.

"YES! Yes, yes, yes! Harry Potter Sir! Dobby would be loving to be his... her?... house elf!" The headbob would have done any spring loaded toy proud. Harry looked at Usagi who nodded back. They had talked about this a bit at the restaurant after Setsuna left. Harry would need help to use the scepter's healing powers. Help holding an irate house elf down to be exact.

"Dobby?" Nods. "You know of Kreacher, the house elf in this house, right?" More nods. "I believe that he's not just an evil git. I think that I can make him better, but I need your help. Will you hold him still just long enough for me to cast healing magic?"

Dobby looked like he was less sure, but still wanted to be a good elf and most elves knew about how Kreacher helped lead his Master into a fatal trap. Free or not, no sane house elf had ever done such a vile thing before. Dobby would help Harry Potter. He nodded sharply.

With that, Harry once more pulled the Scepter of Prissiness out and placed her hand on the door. The door seemed to not want to open at first until Harry poured her knowledge of ownership and intent to open the door into the dirty silver handles. With a click, the door swung open and the three witches, one elf and one ghost stepped into the Foyer. The room was too dark at first. Dobby snapped his fingers and several wall sconces burst to life. Harry, Usagi and Dobby boldly stepped into the center of the room.

With the Scepter of Prissiness but without incantation, Harry sent a beam of magic right into a curtain covered painting on the wall. Nothing would be heard from the former Lady Black until Harry wished it. Thank. God.

Hermione seemed to notice the base of the staircase and went over to sit on the lowest step. Ginny began to stare at the pink haired girl who had taken off her sunglasses upon crossing the threshold. Ginny felt like she was forgetting something. Honestly, she felt like she was forgetting a lot of things. Weren't she and Hermione going to go shopping today? Who was this girl and why did that ghost look like her. Were they sisters?

"Kreacher!" No answer.

"Kreacher! Your Master calls!" The house was silent.

"Kreacher! The Foyer is befouled with blood traitors, halfbloods and mudbloods! What is your worthless arse going to do about it?!"

A pop and a snarl of rage signaled the arrival of Kreacher. Dobby immediately tackled him and the two began to wrestle around on the Foyer floor like two schoolyard scrappers. Harry pulled out her new wand long enough to hit the both of them with a petrification jinx.

"Thank you Dobby. This will be over shortly." Harry once again brought the scepter forward. Both of the recovering witches noticed the scepter begin to glow prismatically as it was pointed down at the pair of helpless elves.

"Whuh? No!" Hermione didn't know what was going on. She still hadn't figured out where she was, who she was or why she was missing such vital information. She did see someone about to cast magic at house elves. Surely they didn't do anything to deserve such harsh punishment as that!

Ginny tackled Hermione right as the older girl began to get off of the first step. Ginny may not be much better off than Hermione was at this point, but she saw that Dobby was working with the pink haired witch and she remembered that Kreacher was a worthless toerag of the lowest sort. She wanted to see Kreacher get what was coming to him.

Harry had been focusing on the trick she pulled back at Jusenkyo to heal that Amazon warrior. This time, she was looking for mental pain and anguish, hatred and coldness. She found the darkness in what almost looked like a crack in the elf's... soul? core? self?... and sealed it with thoughts of family and friends. She basically used her magic to 'kiss the ouchie' away.

In the back of her mind, she began to reconsider what Dumbledore once claimed was the power Voldemort knew not. Love _was _a formidable power. It was the very power which Harry used to defeat the dementors and return the souls of kissed wizards and witches to their bodies. Could she go three for three with Kreacher, here?

The technicolor light show finally ended. Harry cast finite on the elves and let fate determine her course.

Dobby popped to Harry's side opposite Usagi who was grinning like she had won the lottery. Harry's head was glowing again! She was channeling her Jusenkyo given legacy in rare volume this afternoon. Usagi wondered if Harry couldn't honestly become Sailor Moon before Usagi's grand re-entrance to the mortal plane. If there was ever a doubt in Usagi's mind that she would be brought back and that she and Harry would live Happily Ever After, she would have the clues needed to devise her own Plan B. As it was, she ignored Plan B completely. Plan A all the way!

"Master... Mistress Potter. Kreacher is sorry for what he did to Master Sirius. Is there some way Kreacher can fix the wrong of helping his former Master be killed?"

Harry was focused on the penitent elf before her. Two witches in a pile at the foot of the stairs were looking at the girl that had recently been in their dreams as well as their nightmares but never before was she so frighteningly real.

"We may be getting unwanted guests soon. This is an old pureblood house. Does it have defensive wards?" Kreacher nodded. "Can I control them?"

"Kreacher can work them until Mistress Potter is able." Close enough.

"I want this house available only to the people in this room until I personally say otherwise. Oh! And Luna. Luna Lovegood is permitted entry. No-one else enters or leaves at all. Is that possible?"

"Yes, yes. How hard does Mistress want uninvited guests to be pushed away?" Kreacher was beginning to look less penitent and more eager.

"Don't kill them." Harry didn't want to kill anyone bu accident... but she did want to discourage second attempts... "Make it hurt just enough to give them second thoughts about trying again."

Kreacher smiled before bowing and running off to do whatever it was that affected the wards.

"Harry?" The magical aquatransexual turned to Hermione who seemed to be shaking.

"Ohhh, 'Mione. I'm so sorry I didn't get to you sooner." She walked over to the witches who had just finished getting back off of the floor. Now that she was safe behind wards, Harry couldn't ignore the memory of putting the soul of her closest friend back into her body. Tears began to pour out of three witches. "You can't do that to me again 'Mione, you just _can't_!"

Three girls walked into the Front Parlor together and fell bonelessly to a large couch that Harry saw Sirius drape himself over many times before. She could do important things later. Right now, she needed proof that Hermione and Ginny were alive and in tact with souls and everything. Crying and breathing at the same time worked pretty good for that.

Usagi watched from the door. Harry would get better. They all would. Harry could complain about crying like a little girl later after she's done crying like a little girl.

Behind her, two house elves eagerly discussed how filthy the house was and how much work it would be to set things right again.

* * *

"Andrews"

"Yes, my Lord." Andrews was on his knees before Voldemort. He was brave enough or foolish enough to bring bad news in personally but he still felt the subconscious need to prepare for punishment in some form. "I come with news of Diagon Alley."

"Ahhh, yes. How did our friends fair?" The Dark Lord could already tell something had gone wrong from Adrews' posture.

"The attack went well at first, My Lord. As many as a dozen random shoppers had been Kissed and as many as three score seemed to be going the same way. I saw six to eight patroni used but the casters themselves were overwhelmed. This is where... where our good fortune was reversed, my Lord." Andrews knew it was no fault of his own, but he also knew his chances of leaving this chamber unpunished were about to drop to nile.

"Explain."

"A young witch with pink hair traveling in the presence of a female ghost crushed the dementor attack. I saw her from behind, mostly, and from a distance of sixty meters of so. My Lord, she cast the Patronus charm once and flooded three blocks with enough patroni to run off or de-destroy all of the dementors save a f-few. After allowing her ghost to yell at a dementor in some language I didn't recognize, she then proceeded to cast a second spell. One t-that e-executed the remaining dementors. She... she was somehow able to revive nine of the Kissed victims b-by returning their souls to their bodies after collecting them from the d-dead dementors."

There was more of course, but he had to catch his breath for a moment. The whole time, he wondered why he was not writhing on the ground in pain. The Dark Lord was staring him in the eyes with great focus.

"W-When Dumbledore and his Order showed up, the girl ignored him. The ghost went so far as to insult him. I believe she apparated out with two of the recovered victims before the Headmaster could get her measure." Andrews was beginning to get a headache. In this situation, he would take the headache and worse to avoid the punishment he expected.

"This witch complicates matters, but not for you. Your attack with Bella may even reap greater benefits if these fools feel the hubris of victory as I expect some will. Return to your plans."

"Yes, my Lord." He bowed.

"Oh, and Andrews?"

"Yes, my Lord?" He remained in his low bow, almost afraid of the Dark Lords next command.

"Crucio." Voldemort cut the torture curse short as compared to his usual games. Andrews was a competent follower. Even some of his Inner Circle could not aspire to that claim. Andrews stumbled out of the chamber with as much control as he could muster. Voldemort looked into the shadows of his chamber.

"Narcissa, come forward." After a few moments, a frail and timid Lady Malfoy approached his dais wearing torn and dirty silk robes. It was all she had been allowed to clothe herself with in the past few days as a special guest of the Dark Lord. She got to her knees and bowed at just the right angle. Luckily for her, she had responded well to training.

"I have a new task for you. Your talents and connections outside of these halls will once again be useful to me."

" ...thank you master... " Meek and submissive. Perfect for her previous position, but no longer useful.

"Crucio!" The Dark Lord's voice echoed throughout the chamber.

Narcissa responded as one would expect. Her screams gave Voldemort grim satisfaction for twelve seconds before he released the spell.

"Now, now, Lady Malfoy. You will have to take up your previous position in pureblood society. Where is that Malfoy arrogance? Where is your Black family spirit? I trust you will find them again by the time you are properly dressed and ready to be seen in the proper circles. Your son as well."

Narcissa began to get up, only to slip in a pool of her own urine. She began to get up again.

"You and your son will look into this pink haired witch from Diagon Alley for me. Discover who she is and where her loyalties lie. Discover her strengths and weaknesses. She will join us, she will return to her homeland or she will die. See? I can be quite generous when I want to be. Most of the scum out there only get to die. I think Dumbledore will have more trouble with this girl than I will."

Light or not, this new to the scene young witch showed obvious disdain for the old Headmaster. Voldemort had to admire her for that alone. Her pet ghost was another unique detail he'd never seen before. He would consider putting more time into the Orient after England was under lock and key.

Narcissa nodded and bowed as low as she could in her pain wracked state. When no further commands or curses were forthcoming, she slowly made her way up to the main floors and made for her private bedchambers.

* * *

As Narcissa was trying to remember how to think for herself and Harry Potter was running out of tears, members of the Order of the Phoenix were apparating and flooing into Hogwarts castle. They all converged on a side chamber of the Great Hall. Upon entry, Fleur Delacour recognized the room as the very one she had been in for the rather infamous first meeting of Triwizard Champions.

While it was still not public knowledge that Harry Potter had been absent from England, the French beauty was surprised that it was her closer association with the Weasley family that earned her that information and not her membership in this Order.

Ginny and her close friend Hermione had been quite cold to her but Fleur was used to such reactions in other witches and was able to ignore many slights which would have gotten a rise from anyone with lesser social poise. Fleur had been hoping to see Harry Potter again. That was one boy who would truly understand some of the pressures she endures, both from fame and from jealous redheads. Fleur could not wait to witness Harry's interactions with the girls. She asked her Divine Creator every night before bed to have Harry Potter favor Miss Granger over Miss Weasley. Better match or not, thoughts of such divine retribution made her Veela blood come alive.

Fleur took a seat next to young Auror Tonks. They were not close but Tonks was friendly enough and could be a pleasant distraction when these meetings became truly dry. Today, Tonks was troubled for all to see. Come to think of it, nearly all of the Order members who had arrived before her were showing distress at some parchments which everyone had read or were reading. Many were whispering between each other in their own personal arguments. More parchments were ready to be reviewed at every open seat.

Study material? How odd.

Fleur picked up the parchment and immediately saw that it was a letter from Harry Potter to the two witches she was coming closer to despite their childish jealousies. She read through the entire letter, just as the others had. She read it again. By the end of of her second reading, Fleur's countenance matched theirs quite well.

"'ello, Tonks." Fleur hoped her pink haired companion had some insight she could lend. "Zis letter. You know 'o bring it zis evening?"

"Hmm? Oh. Sorry, Fleur. I saw Remus set out the copies. Asked him about it, too. He says it's real from Harry and everything. The original wasn't parchment. It was on muggle stationery."

The metamorphmagus was slowly shifting to darker pinks and purples in her hair. She'd be goth by the time the meeting was over.

"So, it is real, zen?" Tonks could only nod.

"Is it not enough zat 'arry 'as to look out for ze Dark Lord's men? 'e 'as to protect 'imself from us as well?"

Fleur overheard several Order members arguing that this letter had to either be a prank or a lie from a boy under too much pressure. Remus was defending Harry's track record on honesty by reminding others of his actions during the Triwizard Tournament and his determined insistence that Voldemort was back despite what the Daily Prophet and the Ministry said and did to silence him.

The noise level of the room progressively rose as varying details from the letter were either built up or torn down. How dare Harry claim that Dumbledore would allow him to be abused. Teenagers don't respect their families these days. Who are the Chinese to say that we can't get a man pregnant? Why would a man even want that? How could the Chosen One be forced to marry his worst critic? How could anyone believe that this letter is genuine? Why is Harry Potter looking for girls in Asia when he can have his pick of the best witches England has to offer? How could both Snape and Dumbledore be defeated so quickly by a group of girls Harry's age? Surely there was no fight, or, if there was, it did not end so poorly for Albus Dumbledore.

-Bang!-

Albus Dumbledore passed through the door to the room and lowered his wand. His entry was followed by the uneven thump of Mad-Eye Moody's peg leg as the last member to attend this meeting closed and secured the door.

"Ah, good." Albus began. "Everyone appears to be here save Severus, who is recovering from a rather unpleasant encounter with Tom."

He stepped over to the table and sat in the head's chair. Moody took the chair to Albus's right side after waving his wand over it a few times.

"Let's begin shall we?" Albus looked around the room to see quite a few concerned faces. His Order members clearly had more to talk about than this afternoon's attack in Diagon Alley.

"Albus." Moody called for Dumbledore's attention with a short bark and draws his attention to the parchments before them. "Did anyone tell you Potter had written his friends?"

There were a few quiet minutes as the head of the Order of the Phoenix and his chief lieutenant take in the revelations of Harry's rather scandalous letter.

"As many of you no doubt suspect, I take issue with several of Mister Potter's assertions as listed in this document. When I went to retrieve young Harry from his family's loving care, he was still greatly affected by the loss of his godfather and did not wait for a proper explanation of my plans for the summer."

Albus could simply leave it there. However, this letter could be a useful tool were he to explain things just right.

"There is a Betrothal Contract between the Potters and the Snapes-" More than one person scoffed at that statement. "Quiet down. Yes, the contract exists. I witnessed the document signing myself. Now, earlier this summer, Severus came upon evidence that he had sired a daughter out of wedlock. I am, of course, referring to Heather Snape. Mister Potter was to spend the latter half of the summer getting to know his intended and overcoming his problems with Severus.

"Now, in Harry's sorrow for the loss of Sirius, he failed to understand that the Snape contract was for the witch and not the wizard. He also failed to notice that Heather was contractually required bear an heir, it was not to be his duty." Everyone was quiet. The Headmaster was delivering a lecture and you did not interrupt the Headmaster.

"Harry reacted as one might expect a boy to react after hearing that he was to be the wife rather than the husband and fled with all due haste. Harry was gone before I could get even a word out to correct his errant views.

"Fortunately for us, Harry almost immediately encountered Miss Snape and they quickly made their way to the Orient by magical means I have yet to uncover. The two of them have been more than a little careless in their use of magic in Japan recently, so I am afraid that we will have to detain them soon that they may answer to I.C.W. inquiries."

It was a plausible enough explanation that those who didn't believe him now would not risk the verbal abuse of calling him on it. A few quick legillimency checks confirmed it. A handful of members were doubtful, but not enough to cause Albus Dumbledore problems.

"Now, the reason we are assembled here today is the dementor attack on Diagon Alley earlier today and Heather Snape's roll in it."

Tonks had to say something after that implication. "Surely you don't think she was in on it? All that muggle foreign press shows her to clearly be a light witch."

"I don't know what her involvement was, but I do know that no one witch can wield the amount of power witnesses claimed to see in her without some unnatural assistance. I believe that perhaps it was the scepter she carried which truly won the day and turned the battle from a disaster into a victory. Needless to say we cannot allow the Death Eaters to acquire this scepter. Heather Snape is wielding a power far beyond her ability to control and we must retrieve her, the scepter and her betrothed before Tom's forces find them."

Albus, after scanning the memories of people who had seen Heather wield the scepter, thought that the jeweled crystal shaft would look impressive hanging just under the Sword of Gryffindor on his office wall. Definitely under. As if such an effeminate object could be the equal of the Basilisk slaying blade.

"And what of Miss Granger and Miss Weasley?" McGonagall would be concerned for her Gryffindors, of course.

"Whether Miss Snape knew them to be close friends of Harry or if she merely felt she could help them recover, we must look for the two girls. Poppy needs to ensure that they are indeed on the road to recovery. Contact me as soon as you see any one of the four missing children, for when we find one, the others are likely to be close."

It really paid to be one of the most famous and important wizards in Britain. Even the ones who still didn't believe him like Mr. Lupin and Miss Delacour would not stand against him openly. With Nymphadora and Bill Weasley towing the line, there should be some rather energetic arguments behind closed doors tonight.

**End Chapter**

Author's notes:

My pre-reader declared this to be her favorite chapter so far.

While I am very anti-mpreg and somewhat anti-severitus, I may joke on other genres even though I like them. I've seen plenty of good, fun 'Heir of Gryffindor' stories out there for instance. I'm sure it would be easy to hammer on HP/SM crossovers were I of the mind to.

REV 08/2012


	13. MINE Spells Mine, Bitch!

**Chapter Thirteen: M-I-N-E spells mine, Bitch!**

August 19th, 1996

Harry looked up at the ceiling. She briefly considered considered looking somewhere else, but alas, it was beyond her current abilities. Ginny and Hermione both appeared to be sleeping on her soft, fluffy chest. Harry spared a moment from her day to focus on the fact that girl parts did in fact feel kind of nice from this side too; thanks for the testing Minako dear.

Back to her being unable to look around. Right. Well, to be fair, it was somewhat distracting to have your head pinned into position by the sweet smelling silky hair covered heads of two young witches. Each witch had claimed a side and settled into Harry's neck, her chin propped up by the tops of their heads. It was easily as distracting as the soft, fluffy chest bits of said witches firmly pressed into Harry's abdomen.

Harry wasn't about to move those witches, not for any reason. 'I do not need to pee. I do not need to pee. I _**intend **_for my magic to banish that stuff in my bladder directly onto Severus Snape's head.'

Bugger. It didn't work.

"_I wish I had a camera." _A soft voice cooed from nearby_. "You three are soooooo adorable right now." _

Since the crying stopped, Usagi had spent half of her time talking to Harry and the other half following Dobby and Kreacher as they began to clean more than a decade's worth of dust, dirt and dark creature nests.

"_We've got the pensive, Usagi dear. We can look on this scene and any other any time you want." _

_'_Keep talking, I don't need to go to the loo. I don't.' Yes she did.

"_I want a nickname. 'Usagi dear' sounds a bit old fashioned to me. Please, please, please can I have one?" _Usagi was holding her clasped hands to one cheek and batting her eyelashes something fierce.

"_If you can help me figure out how to get out from under these sleeping beauties, I will gladly grant you the most perfect nickname ever. Already thought up an' everything." _Sod waiting, she needed to go.

"_I'll hold you to that." _Usagi thought for a second before her eyes widened and a wicked little smirk warned Harry that she may be up to no good.

Usagi floated right behind Ginny and then quickly hopped in before Harry could react. Half a second later, Harry flinched as Ginny's warm breath crossed her throat and a soft hand traced a line up the inside of Harry's thigh. Harry involuntarily let out a light hiss.

Ginny Weasley's warm brown eyes gazed at Harry. She was wearing Usagi's wicked little smirk and a softer than usual golden crescent moon symbol was visible on her forehead. Far too slowly, she slid away from her Lady Potter shaped pillow and got into a comfortable position to re-deposit the redhead at one end of the sofa.

"_Do you think that getting some smooches in like this would trigger our Betrothal Contract, Harry?" _Usagi asked this as Ginny's head came down to rest on a pillow.

"_Wouldn't be fair to Ginny. She's wanted to snog me since she was, like, eight or something. And I most certainly __**don't **__want the contract to misfire somehow and stick me with her permanently." _Harry relaxed a little as Ginny's eyes closed and the crescent faded out. Usagi slid out of Ginny and faded directly behind Hermione.

"_I think I'm getting better at this ghost stuff." _Harry shivered at once again feeling hot breath across her throat and a soft hand sliding places it shouldn't go. Hermione wore Usagi's smirk and her crescent moon mark for the short trip to the opposite edge of the sofa. Harry began to get up before Hermione's eyes were closed again. She really, really, had to go.

* * *

Bill Weasley still didn't know why Fleur had brought him here, but whatever the reason, it was bloody brilliant.

The two were set to follow his parents back to the Burrow until Fleur pulled him in another direction right before reaching the floo. A bouncy three floo trip was followed by two dual apparitions with Fleur directing their travel. Mad-Eye may have suspected her at this point, but Bill's cursebreaking experience combined with his Veela shagging experience led him to follow her without question. She eventually led him to one of the Delacour family safe houses. When you have political connections like the head of the Delacour family had, and a hot half-Veela wife and hot quarter-Veela daughters, you defended yourself as best you could.

It was only after an hour or two of spectacular sex, Fleur was incapable of a lesser performance, that he even bothered to ask about the change in plans.

"I don't know what we're going to be arguing about in a few minutes, Angel, but your opening statement was quite solid." Bill grinned like he'd just gotten laid. Quite appropriate actually.

"Ze letter and 'arry. You must 'ave suspected, no?" Fleur wanted to start with her lover as relaxed as he could be. 'Make war with love' was an ancient Veela maxim that their race had used to great effect for millennia.

"We look for the kids. If we find them then we tell Dumbledore. What's to argue over about that. Harry just had a really bad day and now he's getting to relax some. It'll be hard to pay up when he gets back," Bill looked over to the nude young woman brushing her hair, "but I'm sure it'll be worth it in the end. Betrothal Contracts usually have a few charms built in for helping the happy couple along. I didn't see this Miss Snape in person, but she seems to be photogenic like you, Angel."

"Oui, she is very good on film. But, zis is not 'ow I see zings. Remember, my love, I am not English raised and I do not zink Dumbledore is wizout sin." She repositioned herself to get the most visual effect out of her natural body curves while combing her hair for Bill's benefit. Women of Veela blood did not need to comb their hair if it was let down as it naturally fell just right every time. He was silent, just as she planned.

"Mister Lupin brought in that letter. 'e said it was genuine. If 'arry Potter wrote zat, zen I will believe 'im over ze 'eadmaster. I do not trust what 'e says about ze Snape witch. If she was raised in England, why do we not know of 'er? Why run away? Why to China? Dumbledore did not address many issues 'arry brought up. Dumbledore is 'iding somezing."

"I'm not sure I agree, but what if you are right. What does that mean for the war?"

"It means, my love, zat if we find 'arry, we should talk to 'im wizout telling ze 'eadmaster first. Give ze boy a chance, oui?"

"And now you are going to sway my decision, oui?" He was getting hard again. How the hell did she do this to him?

"What I am going to do, William, is to show you what happens when you follow your 'eart instead of an old man." The nude part Veela delicately lowered the comb and stood before her lover. She wore ze grin zis time.

* * *

"_Love." _Harry was pulling things out of his pockets and re-sizing them in the Master Bedroom. While the room was still somewhat dark and gloomy, the elves had beaten them here and gotten the real cleaning out of the way. Now, the room just needed new décor.

"_Love?" _She immediately liked it, but she knew he would still explain.

"_It's perfect for you, Love. What drives your life? In and out of 'uniform'? What do you fight for? What do you fight with? What do you give your friends without limit and what do they return in equal measure? Love." _

Usagi was totally going to fuck him the very first chance she got. No. She was going to make love to him. Amazingly, Harry wasn't done.

"_What have you and Cuteness taught me? What have you shown me, smothered me with? I never got that before I came to Tokyo. Well, almost never. Now that I know what love is supposed to feel like, I can see a bit more of it in the past than I could before. Cuteness is more than I have words for. But I've got your measure, Usagi. It's Love." _

Usagi was looking into his eyes with more love than she had shown just about anyone. Ghostly tears were pouring down her cheeks. She was so going to bear his children. Even if they had to wait a thousand years between each one, she swore on her soul that she'd give him as many sons and daughters as he wanted.

You should be careful what you swear to when Fate and Destiny are listening. They pay attention to those kinds of things.

_~BONG~_

"_What was that?" _Usagi and Harry had both been shaken out of their sugary sweet eye lock with a deep bell-like sound which appeared to come from near the stairwell. Whatever else happened, the girls were sure to have woken from that.

"Kreacher!"

Harry wanted assurances that they weren't about to be assaulted by any number of possible foes. Maybe he should get a big foe glass. A really big one. Harry didn't expect to ever meet anyone with more foes than he had.

"Master calls Kreacher?" The elf appeared and bowed low. Harry's eyebrow rose as if expecting an explanation. He got one.

"Kreacher has sent the first uninvited guest away. Guest was was ex-Auror Moody. Master Moody will not feel well when he be waking up again." Harry and Usagi smiled along with Kreacher.

"Harry?" Harry heard the uncertain voice of Ginny from down the stairs. As it was time for introductions and some explanations, boy and ghost headed down the stairs.

As Harry stepped off of the last tread, he saw two nervous witches staring back at him. "Ginny. Hermione."

Rather than say 'hi', both girls began to move closer. More hugs? Harry could certainly live with that. Hermione seemed to get to him just a half step before Ginny, so he reached out and pulled her into a warm embrace. Only, she changed the plans a little. Rather than closing her eyes while leaning left or right for an innocent hug, Hermione grabbed the hair on the back of his head and pulled him into a deep open mouthed kiss. Harry's mind shorted out for a moment. While too shocked to move his hands at all, he did kiss back on a purely reactive basis. Luckily for him, the magic of the moment was shattered by a redfaced redhead.

"Bloody hell, Hermione! That's my snog! Back off!" Ginny went so far as to grab Hermione's arm and try to pull her off of Harry. Finally, he had the jolt required to get control back. He gently broke off the kiss and pulled her hands into his in between their chests.

"Hermione. That was truly brilliant. But can you please tell me what that was for?" Harry could see the fear in her eyes. He could also see the love that, well it _had _been there before but he didn't know what it was back then now did he? Having practiced dealing with emotional girls in Japan Harry immediately used his warmest confident smile.

Oh, _wow_. Hermione had seen lots of Harry Smiles before. She had even seen that one once or twice. But that had been a long time ago and behind his glasses. Right now Harry wasn't wearing those glasses and his eyes bored into hers with a power that caused her breathing to go shallow. He didn't even need to save her soul from utter destruction, like he just did by the way, to get that reaction.

"Hermione, dear? Are you listening?" Hermione couldn't look away but her voice and courage had both left her. All she could do was nod.

"What are you doing, Hermione? I told you I was going to kiss him when he came down!" Ginny was too mad to even remember that the boy in question was within arms reach and could easily hear her. Ginny was somehow able to ignore that yet still see Harry looking down into Hermione's eyes in a way that could only be seen as terribly romantic.

Usagi had in fact expected something like this to happen. She knew a little bit about Harry and Hermione's tight-yet-not-romantic relationship and more importantly knew from experience that being saved by a handsome prince-like young man will make any girl want to suck his face. There was a twinge of jealousy there. While Harry had signed a Betrothal Contract with Usagi, she did have to be alive before she could properly claim him. And by 'properly claim' she meant bounce up and down on his flesh wand.

"I... I'm sorry Harry. I'm sorry I never kissed you like that before. Here you are, saving my life again and again since you were eleven. And then you go one further... It.. it _**ate **_me. It ate my soul. You have no idea how h-horrible that felt! And t-then! And then you save me _**again**__! _If it weren't for you, Harry, I would not _exist _right now."

She was working up a good lecture. Harry, however, did not want Hermione to start making sexual offers in essay format.

"You've got to remember, Hermione, that you've been vital to my life every year since I was eleven as well. Set aside the whole soul in my hand thing and I figure we're just about even when it comes to life saving. I may do the 'saving people' bit, but you taught me how, didn't you?" Harry saw Ginny was trying to get a word in to derail these logic trains. "Not now, Ginny. You'll get your say in a minute. Please? I really need to set Hermione to rights. Come to think of it. You're still a bit pale yourself."

Harry thought about the Alley encounter and what they've done since then. "Dobby!"

pop

"Master Harry calls Dobby?" The elf was as ready and eager as always.

"We need chocolate. Lots of it. Oh, and big cups of hot chocolate and maybe some strawberries or something."

pop

"If the two of you can manage to not snog me for just a moment, I need to introduce you to Usagi." Harry looked over to where his ghost bride was pretending to be uninterested. _"Usagi, Love. We need to figure out how to introduce you properly."_

"_Stupid foreign lanuages. I only got part of that love fest you just had, Stud." _She stuck out her tongue.

"_I can't say she means nothing to me; she means quite a lot actually. She's rather a lot like Ami really except more headstrong and aggressive. And yes, I do love her, but not in the way I've fallen for you. Still, in a bit I'll use some cold water and you can talk to them yourself. What do you say?" _

Ginny was plain confused. When did Harry learn how to speak that ghost's gibberish? Hermione began to wonder what magical means could teach you a foreign language in two weeks or less.

"_As you English say, brilliant!" _Usagi floated back into the parlor with Harry. Both living witches noticed that Usagi's hand seemed to be inside of Harry's almost like they were holding hands. Ginny cursed her luck that even dead girls got more of her Harry than she did. Things were going to have to change. Soon.

After recovering her mental facilities and unloading her heart into Harry's mouth, Hermione became hypersensitive to emotional states and body language. Ginny's blatant unhappiness was no great mystery. Even Harry must have seen that. And when he looked into her eyes, he was so open and there was love in there. She saw it. _But_. But she saw more than that. She felt him kiss back, but not as hard as she kissed him. And the way he talked to that ghost. He spoke to... Usagi... in the same tone he just he used with herself. And that ghostly holding hands trick. Bother. For him to not even react, she must have done that before.

She briefly set aside her personal hypothetical unrequited feelings for a new theorem. She looked over at the silently fuming Ginny. "Only Harry could do this."

"Only Harry could do what?" Ginny wasn't in the mood for mind games.

"Only Harry could circumnavigate Earth and come back with a dead Japanese girlfriend." Really. Harry's the only person alive that could make that work. Hermione followed her host into the parlor.

"Bloody mental, you are." Ginny dismissed the claim out of hand.

Absolutely mental, that one. After Ginny claimed what was hers, she'd find a nice harmless boy for Hermione. Mum's special recipes would be getting a lot of use this year. She took a deep cleansing breath and followed the others into the parlor.

"Kreacher?" Harry called.

pop

"Master calls?"

"Please get my bookbag from my bed, will you?"

"Of course."

pop

"Harry. Why are you ordering two elves around?" Hermione would at least give one of S.P.E.W.'s founding members a chance to explain before getting behind her pulpit.

"Have you ever interviewed any of the elves, 'Mione. You know, research your position, document your findings?" Harry didn't think she ever had.

"What's there to research about on the morals of slavery, Harry?" Hermione thought it was quite simple really. You were a slave or you were not.

"First, I've hired Dobby full time. Now Kreacher's still loyal to the house and to me without pay. If I thought he wanted wages like Dobby, I'd offer them of course, but Dobby's unique as house elves go and you know that. Now I ask you, Hermione. Have you sat down with Dobby or any other house elf and interviewed them?"

"Well, no." She was beginning to see his point. Her natural desire to research a topic had been short circuited by moral righteousness.

"Please talk to Dobby. Talk to Kreacher. I swear on my magic I'll read your thesis on House Elves as soon as the ink is dry." Why didn't he try this the first time? Oh, right; a year and a half ago, he was hopelessly immature even by his own standards. Is this what happens to a bloke when he becomes a Daddy?

pop

Harry took the bag and thanked Kreacher. As soon as he began pulling out present boxes eyes began to light up. Both girls gaped open mouthed as he pulled the jade pensive out of his bookbag and set it on a low table.

pop

Dobby placed the dementor medicine tray down and quietly left to continue cleaning.

"_Usagi, Love, please forgive me, but I must give these girls presents and chocolate. It will help after the dementor attack." _Usagi nodded her acceptance. Harry served Ginny and Hermione. The two witches kept glancing back and forth between the presents, Harry and his ghost companion.

"Ginny Weasley, I'd like to introduce you to Usagi Tsukino." Ginny nodded a bit. Usagi bowed in proper Japanese form to introduce herself.

"Konbanwa. Watashi wa Tsukino Usagi desu. Yoroshiku onegai shimasu." Usagi pulled out of her bow and looked to Hermione.

"Hermione Granger, I'd like to introduce Usagi Tsukino." Hermione dipped into a small curtsey at Harry's introduction.

"I'm ever so pleased to meet you, Usagi." Hermione said with a smile.

Usagi smiled, she could tell she was going to like this one more. After bowing again, Usagi chose to smile and wave.

"Good evening. My name Usagi Tsukino. So sorry, my English not good." Hermione did smile back. Usagi seemed like a nice girl.

"Lovely. Now, the best way to learn my story is to see it first hand, that's why I had Kreacher bring down my pensive." He began to fill the the pensive.

""Can't we do the presents first, Harry? Pleeeeeeaaase?" Ginny added full eyelash flutter and extra poutiness.

Clearly being in the background was no longer an option for Ginny with Hermione declaring her intentions so openly. Harry did look over to see if Hermione was interested in her present. She chose to look away and blush. He figured she must be curious, at least.

Harry relented and handed each girl an identical elegantly wrapped box. As the paper flew off, Harry pulled out a wand and palmed his own kanzashi.

"Are these chop sticks? I've never eaten with these before. Are you going to show us how?" Ginny thought eating with sticks sounded pretty fun actually.

Harry smiled. "While I'd love to show you ladies how to eat with ohashi, or chopsticks, that's not what you've got there. Those are enchanted kanzashi. Magical Japanese hair pins. I'll demonstrate." As the girls both began to look at their gifts with more appreciation, Harry began his now standard cup-water-cold spell-chain. He almost had it down to wordless casting.

"Harry! More under-aged magic?!" Hermione was ever the watchdog.

"Relax, Hermione. The Ministry can't see into this house. And even if they could, I've got more options for casting now." Ginny looked into Harry's hand.

"Harry, that's Dumbledore's wand. Where did you get it?" Both girls almost forgot the presents in their interest.

"That's in the pensive too. Let's finish with the kanzashi first. Now to show you, I'll have to go girl for a bit."

And with that, Harry dipped his hand in the cold water cup and became Heather Snape. Both girls gasped.

"It's also in the pensive. Now observe."

Harry turned away from them and, with a golden stick in each hand, slid them into position for her patented Heather Snape bun and braid. More oooooooh's and aaaahh's. She quickly showed two or three more styles before the girls each gave it a try. When he turned back around, the two girls were glowing in appreciation.

"Right, now it's time for you ladies to see some of my vacation. I've got my big escape, my girlification, a big magical-martial arts fight, meeting magical girls, fighting Snape and the Headmaster and we'll end the tour with Heather Snape fighting Evil in Japan. Sound like fun?" Both witches nodded. Everyone entered the pensive.

* * *

In the bowels of the Ministry of Magic, one Department was made up almost exclusively of witches. The Department of Magical Records was an office where single pureblood female employee's were frequently shunted as a way to peer pressure them into finding a husband and becoming a traditional married English witch. Sexist, yes, but effective. The only wizards who entered the office were either fishing for a wife, on the janitorial staff or on direct orders to retrieve records for a superior. Even then any wizard of sufficient rank tended to send a witch on staff for the errand.

Due to the rather traditional feminine make up of the department, it was run as a tight and efficient gossip machine. Incoming birth, death and betrothal announcements were automatically broadcast department wide as soon as the messengers dropped the parchments onto the proper clerical desk. The old biddies in charge didn't want to have to set down their tea service to go and read the announcements themselves. They also didn't like to get their information second hand and lacking in accuracy.

A Gringotts owl swooped into the receiving room. This was not unusual, nor was the owl's choice to drop his bundle directly onto the proper desk. Owls were trained for this particular run due to the high frequency of bank to department trips during any given day.

As the fresh-out-of-Hogwarts Ravenclaw witch on duty broke the wax seal and began to stamp the parchment 'Received', the department's magical intercom came to life. The witch took another bite out of her chocolate frog.

SNAP – Hissssssssssss

"Dated August nineteenth, of the year one thousand nine hundred and ninety-six Anno Domini. Betrothal Contract. Written for and signed by Lord Harry James Potter, Ancient and Noble House of Potter. Betrothed to and signed by Crown Princess Usagi Serenity, Royal House of the Moon. Witnessed: Gobsmack of Gringotts."

Hsssssssssss – pop

Half of a saliva covered chocolate frog fell to the desk surface and stained a clean sheet of parchment. The Ravenclaw clerk just stared in open amazement at the gossip gold that had just landed on her desk. A heartbeat later, the office around the clerical desk began to fill with witches wanting to see the agreement for themselves. It wasn't that they didn't see a Betrothal Contract for Harry Potter in their office once every three days, because they did. It was the aura of authenticity this one had. Gringotts delivered. Goblin witnessed. For the first time in almost twenty years, a _legitimate _Potter Betrothal Contract had crossed this desk.

The last hour of the work day was devoted to spreading the news far and wide by owl, floo and frequent breaks to 'freshen up' which lead to trips out of the office. These trips always somehow saw the ladies freshening up at a friend's house over tea and biscuits. And gossip.

No fewer than three different contacts in the office tried to be the first to reach Rita Skeeter.

* * *

Three witches and a ghost hopped out of the pensive.

"I believed it when you wrote it, Harry, but seeing it happen is something else entirely." Hermione never really doubted Harry. Getting proof to use against others was a different issue. Until now.

"Since when has my life not been like that? Really. The characters moved around a bit, but the script is the same: One - Harry Potter is accused of heinous deeds. Almost everyone believes Potter is Evil. Two – Hermione Granger and/or a small group of loyal friends support Potter until Big Bad Guy enacts Fiendish Plan. Three – Harry Potter and supporters achieve narrow victory." Harry looks over at Usagi. "The supporters are a bit different this time and the Big Bad Guy is different too. Otherwise, everything else is the same. I'll be on the front panel of a Magical Wheaties box by next summer, you'll see."

"Magical Wheaties? Are your sure about that?" Hermione was fighting back a smile.

"Well, it could be Heather Snape on the cereal box. Her fan base must be way bigger than the Boy-Who-Lived by now anyway." Harry was being honest.

"You sound like Lockhart with your popularity tracking." Harry choked. How could he possibly escape from a Lockhart reference?

"_Want to trade for a while? I need to hide under a rock." _Harry intoned to Usagi. She nodded and then hopped into Harry, much to the surprise of two witches.

"Good evening again! With Harry's translation ring, this will go much better. I am Usagi Tsukino and we have a lot to gossip about!"

Both witches were as upset that Harry would run away as they were that he was out of reach for the time being. The glowing head tattoo was a neat trick though. But hey, if this girl was going to offer up Harry gossip, then who were they to say no? Ginny and Hermione both nodded.

"First, let me tell you about the Silver Millennium. It all started many thousands of years ago..." And so, the girls got to hear of Sailor Moon's past. Hermione was beginning to see what Harry liked in this Usagi girl. Hell, if Hermione were a carpet muncher, she'd be after Usagi too. But, alas, she was not. Usagi even described most of the Tokyo Tower incident to the girls, which got them thinking as to why he left that one out to begin with. After more storytelling than she had to deal with for her own Senshi, Usagi finally got to the last point that needed to be discussed without Harry listening in.

"And so... Ginny, Hermione. You are both wondering why Harry is not bedding one or both of you right now, yes?"

Hermione nodded immediately. Ginny resisted for a moment before following suit.

"The answer is simple. Harry and I are together now."

Two disbelieving stares greet her statement. As scandalous as that sounded, it was still an understatement. Hopefully, they might have some time to work that 'getting married' thing out one witch at a time rather than both together.

"What? He brings you back from soul destruction and the first thing you do is suck his face, Hermione. I may not have been eaten by a dementor, but that spring in Jusenkyo took my soul just the same. Harry and I have something now and we agreed to be exclusive just earlier today."

Ginny wasn't going to listen to this possessive spirit staking her claim any longer. "You're forgetting something. You. Are. Dead. You are no threat to me and I don't care what Harry says about you! People don't come back to life, so you might as well just go back to China or wherever and save yourself the heartache."

It was bad enough that Phlegm Delacunt was stealing her brother Bill away. At least that part-Veela slag was alive. No foreign Moaning Myrtle was going to take Ginny's future husband away from her.

"Have you not been listening? I've been dead before. Several times. I've also come back to life several times. This time won't even be the longest wait." Usagi almost pitied this girl, losing her Prince Charming to a ghost. But then, Ginny was turning out to be quite a bitch, so nevermind.

Hermione couldn't hold back any longer. "But how do you come back? Wizards and witches can't do that. Voldemort may have been in spirit form for a while, but the Headmaster always claimed that the Dark Lord didn't really die when Harry defeated him the first time. Even with magic, there is no coming back from the dead."

Hermione needed to have a long private talk with Harry. She could get along with Usagi if that's what Harry wanted, but there was also the whole defeating Death component to this story. Hermione wondered if Usagi would be able to put some memories into the pensive so that she could study the girl's claimed powers over Death. Oh! And memories of a long dead Moon Kingdom! Absolutely must get some of those.

"I don't know how my powers as Sailor Moon work, Hermione. One day I was a regular girl with a regular life and then a talking cat tells me that I've been chosen to fight Evil. At first it was really scary and I can't tell you how often my lack of training almost meant the end of me but for the timely aid of allies I didn't even know about. I learned the hard way why Evil must be fought off and I've got the skills to do it now but I still don't know any technical details. There are no books on how celestial bodies stuff young girls full of powerful magic without killing them."

Usagi looked again at the two witches. Hermione looked like she was working things out in her head. At least she wasn't making this difficult. Ginny was sure to be trouble. Usagi's seen that look before on the faces of some very not-nice people. Ginny was going to be a lot of trouble. Maybe Usagi should get out of Harry's body before that redhead did something everyone would regret.

"Look, why don't I give Harry back his body and we can deal with dinner and sleeping arrangements?" Both witches nodded. Usagi's golden crescent faded and Harry was able to take control.

"So. You three are now the best of friends, yeah?" Harry's hopeful look died upon looking at the resigned faces of Usagi and Hermione and the rather Vernon-like visage of Ginny. At least the girls weren't beating him over the head with... whatever it was... quite yet. A awkward and mostly quiet evening was better than the alternative. Ginny and Hermione both accepted his invitation to spend at least one night at Grimmauld place so that a plan could be formed on how to deal with the Headmaster. Harry decided to ask Usagi about the cold war she and Ginny were fighting when she perved on him in the shower tomorrow morning.

As Harry fell asleep, he promised himself to write letters to Luna, Cuteness, Ami and Minako in the morning.

* * *

August 20th, 1996

"_What do ya want, Nabiki?" _Ranma was scarfing down some beef bowl at a local restaurant near the hotel room he and Shampoo had been sharing in Nerima. He planned on getting out of town today or tomorrow and being told to meet old acquaintances was not helping matters.

"_Do I need a reason to catch up with you? You used to be really important to me. You'll never know how much it hurt to see you disappear for years. I was heartbroken." _Her wallet was heartbroken. That naïve jock was a magical money generator for the Ice Queen of Furinkan High. He still could be. To that end, Nabiki was wearing her tightest jeans and a tight shirt that showed more than the usual amount of cleavage. She was observing him over an iced coffee.

"_P-chan caught up with me the other day. I was important to him too. Is it just me or has he gotten slower?" _Ranma was being true to his old ways by completely missing any subtle hints that her outfit may have been providing. What did Nabiki have that Shampoo didn't have more of or better anyway?

"_Really, Ranma honey, is fighting __**still **__all you think about? At least your taste in friends is as exotic as always."_

"_I saw your late night news update. I bet you were even at the Bandai thing yesterday, or saw it second hand." _Ranma set down his chopsticks and looked Nabiki in the eye. _"I will not tell you anything I know about Teen Witch or her new friends. Fuck off, Nabiki."_

"_You have such a dirty mouth, Ranma. I could clean it for you." _Sure Ranma was smarter than he used to be, but he still made mistakes. He as much as admitted that he knew much more than was public. And not just Heather; he knew something about 'her new friends' too.

"_Shampoo's signed on for that job, Nabs. Go find some politician to expose or something."_

"_But you're so much fun. Maybe Shampoo could use some help tonight?" _Loose lips sink ships and all.

"_No deal Nabiki, Shamps and I are leaving town. Nobody gets a forwarding address this time." _Ranma had enough of this shit. He began to get up from a half eaten breakfast just to get away from the bitch.

"_Don't mind me, Ranma. I'll stop asking about Heather. I know you Jusenkyo victims like to protect each other." _He flinched at her words.

'I'm right!' Nabiki knew she wouldn't have the interview she was hoping for, but this little trip was still proving worth while. Ranma didn't say another word as he left the restaurant and disappeared into morning rush hour traffic.

Nabiki got out of her seat and went back to the Ladies Room. She had to check her wire and plan her next move on 'Miss' Snape. Nabiki spent a couple of minutes adjusting the small electronics package hidden under her bra cups and looked up to check her makeup. She was more than a little surprised to see a Senshi standing behind her.

"_If you had seen Ranma's potential on that fateful first night, do you think you would have taken a risk and claimed the boy? The two of you could have been very happy together." _Sailor Pluto liked to play with people like Nabiki. It always freaked out the manipulative ones how easily she could fuck with their lives.

Nabiki studied the magical girl behind her. Green hair, dark red eyes and the ornate staff she carried identified her as Sailor Pluto. While Nabiki found herself unable to keep a mental picture of this Senshi's face in her mind, there was one audible detail she picked up that hadn't been commented on much before.

"_Aren't you a little old to be a magical girl?" _Nabiki gave her rack one final adjustment.

"_Age becomes meaningless in my position, Miss Tendo. You can stop toying with your equipment now. It stopped working as soon as I spoke up." _Pluto spoke in an even tone, no real emotion betrayed her to Nabiki's advantage. Damn, this recorder was brand new.

"_Would you care to comment on the high rate of lesbianism within the Senshi ranks, Sailor Pluto?" _Her memory still worked. At least Nabiki thought it did. Would she know if it didn't? Crap.

"_You shouldn't mistake bisexuality for lesbianism. I tend to blame it on the lack of local males capable of handling a magical girlfriend. Tuxedo Mask is a notable exception, but he's only one man."_

"_What about 'Miss' Snape? Where did Sailor Venus take the young stud anyway?" _Nabiki thought that Pluto would spend more time dodging and less time answering.

"_And here we get to the real issue. You wanted to ask Ranma about Jusenkyo. You think you can ask me the same line of questions." _

Pluto stepped closer into Nabiki's personal space. Without moving into an aggressive stance, Pluto pressed into Nabiki's back so that the magical girls mouth was near the reporter's ear.

_"There will come a time when it's okay for your audience to learn about Jusenkyo. There will come a time when they may learn about hidden magical worlds. That time is not now, Miss Tendo. Run your stories of magical girl-on-girl action. Run your stories of Sailor Venus learning how to fight crime in England. If you even hint at Jusenkyo or a hidden magical world, you will not like the consequences."_

By the time Pluto's breath stopped warming Nabiki's ear, the Senshi had already moved halfway to the restroom door.

"_But how will I know when it's okay to report those stories?" _Nabiki needed to see if a reward would be offered for good behavior. If not…..

"_If you play by the rules, you might have a very Merry Christmas this year. Until then, Miss Tendo."_

Nabiki's green haired visitor walked out of the restroom. She tried to catch any hint of the magical woman outside the restroom, but gave it up for a lost cause. As Nabiki stepped out of the restaurant that she had followed Ranma into half an hour ago, she mentally cataloged every word spoken. The unscheduled interview went pretty well if you ignore the implied threat. Not that those rattled her; she got two or three a day now. Still, this is the first time a magical girl has drawn a line and told Nabiki not to cross it.

"_Saint Nicholas better be generous this year. New BMW's aren't cheap." _Nabiki turned to check on an informant of hers two blocks down.

* * *

"_Mommy's here!" _

Cuteness jumped up from her breakfast and zipped around the table to her mother. Usagi fought back the urge to dodge through the wall behind her and trick Cuteness into eating plaster. As it was, the pink rocket slowed down just fast enough to be half inside of Usagi and half outside of her when all forward momentum was killed.

_"Oh!"_

Cuteness's bottom met wood flooring as she was unable to handle the odd feeling of being partway through someone else.

"_I love you too!" _Usagi began to giggle as Hotaru stared at Cuteness oddly.

"_Usa-chan? What do you mean 'Mommy's here'?" _Hotaru heard her best friend yell out for no reason, run to nowhere and then fall on her ass after hitting nothing.

"_My Mommy! Usagi! She's right here in this room." _As Cuteness turned away from Hotaru, she began to throw questions at her invisible dead mother at an insanely high word-per-minute rate. Hotaru was clearly missing a lot because Cuteness was reacting as if her questions were being responded to at full speed. Hotaru was about to return to breakfast when her friend squealed and shouted loud enough for the others upstairs to hear.

"_OH NO HE DIDN'T! REALLY? REALLY, REALLY? Oh, Momma, that's WONDERFUL!"_

"_Quiet down!" _Haruka stumbled down the staircase while trying to button her shirt up. _"What's with you anyway, shrimp? Seriously, I almost had her over the edge when -"_

"_When nothing!" _Michiru, who had followed Haruka down, was working on correcting the hem of her skirt. It seemed to be a bit twisted. _"Is there some kind of excitement, Chibi-usa? Some news scandal on a morning show?"_

"_No! Momma's back from England and you'll never guess what they did at the bank!" _She stopped, bright red eyes twinkling not unlike a certain headmaster when a plan really comes together.

"_Tell us already!" _Hotaru couldn't wait any longer.

"_They signed a Betrothal Contract! Direct written proof that they're gonna get married! It was __**his **__idea!" _The other girls began to lose jaw control. _"It's so romantic. Harry even wrote into it that the contract is active once they share their First Kiss! How totally Disney is that?!"_

"_Would anyone like to read a copy?" _A new voice had piped in from the entryway.

"_Puu!" "Setsuna-momma!" _The two youngest Senshi once again tackled She-Who-Is-Without-Age. Setsuna was immaculate as always, except today she also held a parchment roll in her hand.

"_Is that it? Is that the contract?" _Michiru had noticed the scroll in Setsuna's hands and put two and two together.

"_A certified copy, yes. Azabu-Juban's district offices are not ready to have a Magical Girl Princess Betrothal Agreement on file. Especially not since it has Usagi's full proper title on it."_

Setsuna was actually impressed. This contract fit in rather nicely with the 'flavor' of the new timeline versus the old one. It would help tremendously. Setsuna moved over to the table and unrolled the contract next to Cuteness's unfinished rice and miso soup.

As the goblin lettering had a distinct Old European feel to it, most of the girls listened to Setsuna translate rather than attempt to read it themselves. Cuteness kept reading and re-reading the document until the oohh's and aaahhhh's from the others died down. There was a stunned silence when they got to Usagi's signature.

"_Her signature is very important here. This document is one of the interesting changes between the Chiba-centric timeline which used to be our future and the Potter-centric timeline we now call home. There is one more great evil that Sailor Moon must do battle against before work on Crystal Tokyo can truly begin. In the old timeline, Usagi's victory automatically caused her to Ascend to the throne with Mamoru. This time, the contract will activate and there will be a slower build up to our Happy Couple's Wedding." _Setsuna took a moment to adjust. Then she looked directly to Cuteness.

"Harry will deal with his Dark Lord problem before out next great enemy approaches. While Mister Potter and our other new allies can do little against Sailor Moon's next great threat, they do make a big difference in the world Crystal Tokyo is built in afterwards. Big enough, in fact, that a new Crystal Millennium comes after the splendor of Crystal Tokyo." Setsuna's focus on Cuteness is unbroken.

"Do not fear the future, my princess. Trust in your mother and father and your future will be far brighter than your past ever was." Cuteness soooo wanted to hug her mother right now. They were both weeping openly, even if most of the rooms occupants only saw one crying Usagi and not the other.

"_It is a little known fact that Queen Serenity the First, your grandmother, always wanted her daughter to Ascend the throne on her Wedding Day. To properly honor Senny's wishes, I will announce Usagi's Royal Ascension upon completion of the ceremony." _

Setsuna must have gotten some sand in her eye. Right. That's why she had to wipe it away. That's also why she referred to the former Queen of the Silver Millennium with a nickname that may not have been spoken aloud in more than ten thousand years. After a few moments of quiet contemplation, Setsuna spoke up once more.

"_I'll be taking this to the Tsukino house tomorrow. They deserve to know that their daughter is coming back." _The others took note of this breach of secrecy.

"_But what happened to keeping everything a secret?" _Michiru and Haruka already had their non-Senshi career paths set and wanted to make the most of them before being 'outed'.

"_The secret will still be safe. This is Usagi's family we're talking about. I'll bet the house we're living in against whatever you have in your pockets that her family already knows. With a talking cat teaching her the basics in her bedroom after dinner every night, there is no way she kept it secret at thirteen." _The idea that Usagi could keep the secret was quite inconceivable. Smiles returned to the table.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore glanced over to the shelves of delicate silver instruments and placed a lemon drop into his mouth. The one tracking Harry's wand fell silent shortly after Dumbledore lost the Elder Wand to the boy. In contrast, a spinning and tweeting monitor three pieces down has been active since Albus came back into his office. That one was the Grimmauld place monitor. Headmaster Dumbledore sent a messenger patronus to Moody alerting him to the activity. With any luck, the retired auror would be able to return to the castle with a teen or two. That was over an hour ago. Albus crunched down and swallowed his lemon drop. As he reached for his ninth lemon drop in two minutes, a castle elf popped in with an official parchment in his hands.

"Headmaster, Sir. A parchment from Gringotts has been delivered for you." The elf levitated his parchment over to the Headmaster's desk and quietly popped away.

The parchment bore a golden wax Gringotts Seal which could not be duplicated by wizarding magic. Albus still scanned his delivery for enchantments and potions just the same. He looked at the Seal for a few moments, lost in memories of a hundred similar parchments from his past, before cracking the enchanted wax seal and reading the contents of this official goblin correspondence.

After reading the parchment twice to ensure he properly understood, Albus opened a drawer under his desktop and retrieved a small cloth sack. This sack contained the 'special' lemon drops that he brewed himself on those rare opportunities when he got to visit the dungeons without students or teachers to deal with. As the muggles were known to say, these lemon drops were really good shit, man.

Albus took two of them together and followed them with a shot of his personal restorative draught. The phoenix tears and scotch mix both enhanced his special candies and prevented his heart from stopping. Did he mention how especially potent these lemon drops were? Was that wall breathing? Oh! The dancing broomsticks were back! Ha-ha! They always put on a good show.

The wacked-out Headmaster began to drool on himself. As castle elves had experience with these episodes, they immediately began to clean and care for the old man while preventing others from reaching him.

Others like an aching ex-Auror with a peg leg. Fucking house wards bounced him like a redheaded step-child. What the hell was Albus doing up there with the no-visitors wards up, interviewing the next Head Girl?

When Albus Dumbledore came back down three hours later, he began to write out his request for an I.C.W. special council meeting tomorrow and a Wizengamot emergency session on Friday. He had some loose cannons to tie down and the Greater Good to ensure. Albus would put Mister Potter in his place and have the boy reverse his Gringotts request. In fact, Harry would escort Albus down to the Potter vaults and Albus would make the boy watch as he picked through the cream of the old pureblood artifact crop. Harry couldn't have any toys. They were Albus's toys now and he didn't like to share.

**End Chapter**

REV 08/2012


	14. Maximum Girliness Achieved

**Chapter Fourteen: Maximum Girlieness Achieved**

August 20th, 1996

GODDESS OF DIAGON ALLEY

By Rita Skeeter

In a shocking display of terror and evil, the dementors of Azkaban revolted against their former masters yesterday and fell upon the helpless wizards and witches of Diagon Alley. This dark army of soul eating beasts could have created the worst disaster to befall the Magical World since the fierce attacks of Grindelwald, but Magical Britain was saved!

Who saved hundreds from being Kissed? No, it was not Harry Potter! A young witch, perhaps even of Hogwarts age, with long pink hair, with bright red eyes and a ghost companion defeated over a hundred dementors by casting only two spells.

Hufflepuff student Hanna Abbot tells the tale. "It was horrid. The street had gone dark, so cold." Miss Abbot was so shaken by reliving the memories for this interview caused her to weep. "They were coming for me! Me! I begged them to turn away! Harry was teaching how to cast the Patronus Charm just last year but faced with so many dementors I couldn't do it! An then _she _appeared."

She who? Some call her a goddess. Some claim she came from Avalon. Others claim the girl was just doing business at Gringotts. All agree on what happened next.

The Goddess of Diagon Alley held aloft a crystal wand and called great light into being. Even as this paper prints, her herd of patronus deer have not yet left Diagon Alley. These patroni routed all but a few of the dementors. The Goddess and her ghost seemed angered when they came across the body of a young pureblood witch, too young for Hogwarts, who had received the Kiss. So angered were they that the few remaining dementors were all destroyed by the witch's second spell. While no witnesses could recall the complete spell, many noted that the incantation began with 'Moon'. In a feat that may have never been achieved before, this righteous girl collected as many as a dozen souls of the Kissed from the defeated dementors and returned them to their original bodies! The Kissed pureblood child, youngest daughter of Lord Greengrass, was among those who were revived. Sadly, as many as six wizards and witches were not revived and remain soulless.

Many witnesses to the excitement claim that her dramatic exit was as shocking as anything she had done so far! How can this be, you ask?

Arwen Wyllit, an assistant at Madam Malkin's, had this to say, "Headmaster Dumbledore appeared just as the girl was returning the last soul collected to it's owner. When he called to her, she ignored him. She took the hand of the last victim she saved and also took the hand of a witch who seemed to know the victim. I never knew you could apparate with two hangers-on... she must have been really powerful. Her pet ghost made some sort of gesture with her hands to Headmaster Dumbledore before leaving. It looked rather rude." A muggleborn wizard who wished to remain nameless commented that the hand gesture was a muggle sign showing great disrespect. I dare not write details lest children hear how crude the muggle world can be.

Why did such a light witch ignore and insult the only wizard He Who Must Not Be Named has ever feared? Why did this supposed Goddess take two witches in need of a healer to places unknown? We may never know but I dare say the truth will out when other evidence is considered. This reporter suggests that the odd abduction will make sense to anyone who reads the following article on the Betrothal of the Boy Who Lived.

POTTER BETROTHED

By Rita Skeeter

Witches of the Magical World, there is shocking news from the Ministry of Magic. Multiple sources revealed that just yesterday a Gringotts certified Betrothal Contract for the Boy Who Lived, the Chosen One, Lord Harry James Potter was filed at Ministry of Magic offices. Is the most eligible bachelor in the whole of the Wizarding World off the market? Has the Chosen One made his own choice? Or was he tricked?

Before the Third Task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament, it was clear to this humble reporter that the Chosen One would follow in his father's footsteps and pursue the heart of a muggleborn witch and Hermione Granger seemed to be just the one. Smart if plain, it is she who unnamed sources inside Hogwarts claim monopolizes most of our Chosen One's time in and out of class. But, dear readers, she is not the betrothed!

Within the pages of this noble news provider, you can read for yourself a copy of the contract. The name of the lucky girl, you ask? Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon! Dear readers, you must be asking if this is a prank. I assure you it is not! Goblins may plot to take your gold, but they can spot a fake better than Merlin and this Potter Betrothal was Gringotts sealed.

The question is, who is this Moon Princess? Sources report that the exotic characters above the girl's name, her true signature, are Japanese. Is she an Asian descendant of the fabled Moon Queen who's story is older than the Tales of Beedle the Bard? Has the Chosen One found an ally who will help him defeat He Who Must Not Be Named, but at a price? Has he been enchanted to love a sorceress who only seeks to use his fame and wealth to her own ends?

This reporter submits to you that is was she who appeared in Diagon Alley earlier yesterday and used unknown magic to save hundreds of British wizards and witches of from the dementor's kiss. She who is known as the Goddess of Diagon Alley used powerful magic and was heard invoking the Moon in her second spell. Her wand was described as being made, not of wood, but of crystal and jewels. What was a foreign magical doing in Diagon Alley? Why flee from Albus Dumbledore with two weak and vulnerable witches?

Sources claim that the two witches she apparated out of the alley with were none other than Hermione Granger and Ginevra Weasley. These witches are tied to the Boy Who Lived more closely than any other in Hogwarts according to current Gryffindor gossip queen, Lavender Brown, "We've got a pool going on who will be the next Mrs. Potter. Hermione and Ginny are the ones to beat, ladies. Harry hardly pays attention to any other witch unless they're part of his study group."

Is this an innocent mistake or something more sinister? Would a Crown Princess stoop so low as to abduct the only competition she may have for the heart of the Chosen One? I pray for Miss Granger and Miss Weasley, dear readers. You should too.

For the Potter Betrothal Contract, see page 5.

For more on the myth of the Moon Queen and it's origins, see page 13.

For more on Potter's romances, see page 14.

The Boy-Who-Lived-to-Become-A-Magical-Alien-Princess-Upon-Contact-With-Cold-Water sat and read the morning paper while a wizarding wireless radio released the sounds of some witch band or other into the background. Harry set the morning edition of the Daily Prophet down and considered what he had just read. Almost without exception, he had wanted to burn any words printed by that toerag Skeeter. This paper was different.

"Dobby?"

pop

"Harry Potter calls for Dobby?" The elf was wearing one of Hermione's caps and a pair of mismatched socks beneath a clean toga made from a black family pillowcase.

"Right... er, first. If you and Kreacher want more official looking uniforms, I'm sure Hermione would love to help put something together. Be sure to tell Kreacher that I'm not giving him clothes, just the chance to properly display his loyalty." Harry didn't know if that would work, but thought it would be worth trying. "Second, once everyone is done reading this paper, I would like for the front page to be placed in a frame and displayed in the Foyer. Can you do that for me?"

"Dobby would be honored to display the paper, Harry Potter Sir." Dobby bowed.

"Thank you, Dobby."

pop

Harry really wanted to sit down for an hour or two and write some letters, but first he had to deal with his own potent aroma. Cloaks were sweaty affairs if you didn't know the right charms to fix them up some and Harry didn't know those charms yet. The last time Harry picked up a household charms book, Ron swatted it out of his hands claiming that such spells were witches' work.

Harry was almost halfway through his shower when the amorous specter of his Intended made her first appearance. His first hint was a cold spot that formed on his chest. Harry opened his eyes.

"_Morning, Love. Where have you been to get you so chipper this morning?" _Harry saw a bright smile on Usagi's face. She wasn't staring at his wedding tackle either.

"_I discovered a new ghost thing I can do!" _She looked like a little girl who brought a new kitten home from the store.

"_Brilliant! But first, can you answer a question for me?" _He continued cleaning himself. Talking to a dead girl in the shower was becoming commonplace for him. She nodded.

"_What happened between you girls when you were in my body yesterday?" _Harry watched Usagi's smile drop and become a little forced.

"_Girl things Harry. I may not be an English witch, but girls are girls no matter where they grow up. I will take care of it. I think you were right about Hermione and Ami. I like Hermione." _'Please, please. Please don't keep asking about Ginny'.

Harry knew that 'girl things' was code to say that he either couldn't understand the problem or shouldn't want to. Fine.

"_I give up. Tell me about your new trick." _Usagi's face lit up again.

The ghost did a little pirouette before picking up one shoe covered foot and holding it rather higher than he thought she'd be capable of. In life this girl must have been really flexible.

Her cute spin caused Harry to look over her appearance which was unchanged since he first saw her. Her outfit was what one would expect from a Japanese schoolgirl. A blouse and a pleated skirt which stopped above the knee covered most of Usagi. There were several inches of see through skin before reaching the tops of her nearly knee high socks and Mary Jane shoes. Simple and cute. Looking Harry in the eye the whole time, she took her index finger and traced a line from the top of her sock to the toe of her captive shoe. Half a second later, the sock and shoe vanished.

"_Wha- what did you do!?" _

Harry was in panic mode. His brain wanted to evade. Another part of his body wanted to declare General Quarters and find some way to retaliate. His indecision gave her time to enact her nefarious plan to marginalize the redhead. A second finger ran from knee to toe on her other leg. More material vanished. Still looking Harry in the eye, she grinned wickedly before touching her index fingers to her neck and dragging them down over her chest to the top of her skirt.

"..."

Usagi finally looked down to see that Harry Junior must like the skirt-only look. Her grin became incandescent.

"_I may be dead, Harry. But I think you are very much alive." _Her giggles echoed through the Master Bathroom as she enacted the final step of her plan, the part Rei and Cuteness had both experienced in different ways.

Usagi stepped up to and then through Harry. There were a lot of sucky things about being dead, but this was by far the best part in Usagi's opinion. As soon as she stopped shuddering, she turned around and stepped through the burning heat that was Harry's embodied spirit a second time. If Usagi had a live body, she would have fallen to the shower floor in post orgasmic bliss after that. Like Harry did. Harry?

"_Harry?" _She looked at his face. Wow, Mamoru's face looked like that a couple of times after he... Usagi looked for evidence in the puddles flowing to the drain. 'Jackpot! I win!' _"Was it as good for you as it was for me, Harry?"_

Yes. Yes it was.

"_L-Love?" _Harry's voice wavered a little.

"_Yes, Harry?" _The topless ghost responded. 'Oh! I forgot to take off my panties! Maybe next time...'

"_Did we just have sex?"_

Usagi briefly contemplated of what she had just done.

_"Noooo... I think it was just kind of sex-like. We'll just have to play around more next time."_ Usagi slid a set of spectral toes between Harry's thighs as he sat on the shower floor. Her eyes lit up as he shuddered one more time._ "I went through Rei before we left Tokyo. It felt, well... I can't what it felt like. But as so many television commercials state 'individual results may vary'."_

Usagi willed her bra and shirt back on before floating down the stairs. She could not wipe the grin off her face no matter how hard she tried. What was it that the Happy Princess would do in those kid's shows she used to watch? The ones Usagi caught Cuteness watching several times a week? Oh, right! It was time to sing!

Lucky Cha Cha Cha chicchakutte  
kawaii yume ga aru kanaetai  
Lucky Cha Cha Cha onna nara  
minna ga motteru  
chicchana yume wo

Bloody hell, no. She's singing now? The wireless was already on! Ginny was quite certain that this morning would hold the Worst Morning Ever title for years to come. Not the morning after the giant snake? No. That was a good morning. The Harry Potter had just saved -cough- Princess -cough- Ginny for the first time. Rather pleasant actually. And waking up after the Department of Mysteries wasn't too bad either. Sure they were injured, but they won again and the fight really got her blood pumping. If Harry's Godfather hadn't bought it near the end, Ginny's plan was to shag the conquering hero after getting out of the hospital wing. So, that night was disappointing but not bad. The morning after the Second Task was quite depressing once Ginny figured out that Harry would 'sorely miss' Ron more than her. That was just plain gross.

Under the moonlight  
Under the moonlight  
mitete yo otsukisan

This dead bitch's singing was only part of it. Though clearly she couldn't carry a tune on top of her other more heinous crimes. That 'Harry and I are together' thing last night was a bigger part but Ginny could have shrugged that off and focused on getting rid of her domestic competition for Harry. No, this was even worse than that.

kare ni furarechatte  
kanashii  
otome no higeki ne

Ginny and Hermione had come into the kitchen after Harry went to get cleaned up. Two witches sat down at the table for eggs and sausage courtesy of Dobby and Kreacher. Ginny got to the Prophet before Hermione did. She almost immediately sprayed a mouthful of pumpkin juice across the table. Hermione put down her juice soaked sausage and looked at the morning's headlines. Both witches read through the two main articles with ever widening eyes.

Lucky Cha Cha Cha dekkakutte  
SUTEKI na yume dakara chikadzukou  
Lucky Cha Cha Cha chotto zutsu  
kasanete yukou  
chicchana yume wo (1)

Usagi finally stopped singing when she got to the kitchen and saw the shocked (Hermione) and enraged (guess who) faces of two living witches.

"Good Morning, Granger-san, Weasley-san." Usagi waved to them with a jazz-hands technique that fit well with her Best Morning Ever vibe.

Ginny really wished the girl were alive so she could hex the shit out of her. She made a mental resolution to research magic capable of affecting ghosts.

* * *

"Ah, Nimbus Two-thousands." Quality Quidditch Supplies seemed to have quite a lot of them today. That gave Harry an idea. "Gin."

"What?" A blonde with pale blue eyes turned to her friend. No, not a redhead. They knew better than to leave Grimmauld Place with recognizable features today. With that Prophet article, half of magical Britain must be looking for young redheaded witches and pink haired goddesses. Harry wondered if this would force Tonks to abandon her favorite color for a few days. Hermione and Usagi stayed behind to do some research or something. They probably just wanted to gossip without Angry Ginny around. Hermione had the translation ring and has having a wonderful time just speaking in Japanese.

"There's twenty-six of us in the D.A., right?" Malfoy and his bunch must have payed attention to who was in his defense group. They could be targets, and Harry knew from experience that having a way out was a really good idea.

"If you still count the sneak, yeah. What of it?" Ginny could see that the wizard hidden in a witches' body, who was paying homage to Sailor Mercury with blue eyes and blue hair today, was thinking up one of his... her... people saving plans.

"I've come in to a fair bit of gold. I think it's time I showed my appreciation to those who supported me last year." So she did. The clerk was more than happy to give a volume discount to the girl wishing to help him sell off the used brooms. A rich league patron had just donated new Firebolts to three of his favorite teams who had then unloaded all of their surplus Nimbus's. While the clerk didn't remember seeing these witches before, they were asking the right questions. Purebloods were sometimes known to do odd things but as long as they were willing to spread the wealth then who was he to complain?

Harry finally agreed to get brooms for every D.A. Member, save the sneak, plus two spares. Harry also got one for herself so she could mount it on the wall. She had fond memories of her first Nimbus. Her final purchase in the store involved discussions over a trainer broom for a pre-hogwarts witch. Nimbus Two-thousands were right out. Cuteness needed a broom that would let her make a few mistakes in the early days. Harry also picked up two different beginner's flying books and an intermediate trick flying book too.

When it came time to pay up, Harry simply called, "Kreacher."

pop

"Ma- Mistress called Kreacher?" Ah, the clerk was right. He knew the wealthier pureblood witches sometimes liked to mix with the common folk but they always went to their house elves when it came time to settle the account.

"We're taking home a lot of brooms today. Please pay this nice man and see about delivering them, will you?"

Asking her elf nicely? This girl was odd even by pureblood standards.

"As you wish it, Mistress."

The elf did at least have the proper humility before his betters.

"Thank you Kreacher." The blue haired witch and her blonde companion left the quidditch shop and continued down the street. As they entered the modest pre-lunch crowd, Harry discretely cast a privacy charm.

"So... you feeling better now? You just helped me spend a small fortune on brooms. One of them will be yours to keep. We'll be getting ice cream. We're going clothes shopping." She looked over to her faux blonde companion. "Are you going to forgive me for signing a Betrothal Contract or do I need to grovel some more? We could spend all our time in Madam Malkin's with me telling you how it's you that makes the robes look good. How 'bout it?"

Ginny carefully weighed her options. In truth, she had already forgiven Harry, but held onto her anger at the insanely happy ghost and her disturbingly bare feet. Ginny wasn't about to ask how or why a ghost managed to pull off her shoes. That's what Hermione was for. If it weren't for Harry being sorted Gryffindor, she may have let the Sorting Hat put her in Slytherin like it wanted. Ginny thought that the hat may have hinted to making a similar offer to her Chosen One. They were simply meant to be, she was sure of it.

"Well..." Ginny teased, "we still don't know how I can go home without the Headmaster learning everything yet, so... a compromise. You worship the ground I walk on while we're out here in public. In exchange, I play nice back at the house as long as I'm a guest. Deal?"

Harry nodded. Ginny just wished she could have struck this deal last summer when Harry could still walk the streets as a boy. The best she could get today is Best Friend treatment unless she wanted people to think she's a witches' witch.

Florean Fortescue's was boarded up. When did that happen? Harry became far more concerned when he noticed that Ollivander's was similarly out of business. Where were the First Years getting their wands? Harry supposed there could be other wand shops but she'd never seen one. Come to think of it, there _was_ a small selection of wands in that shop in Tokyo he went to with Ami. Maybe she could get one for Cuteness? Harry thought back to a few of her, then his, first year classes. Right. No unsupervised wand use.

Harry managed to lift Ginny's spirits in Madam Malkin's. They didn't go crazy but each witch got a few things and Harry was very complimentary of Ginny's choices. They also got Hermione a couple of things to add variety to her magical wardrobe. Before leaving the robe shop, Harry also got Ginny's and the seamstresses help on putting together a few outfits for a nine year old foreign witch that she was 'related to distantly'. It was true if you take physical distance into account. Genetically, they weren't so distant. They lost control in the fun of gift selection and got enough things to last several birthdays and Christmases, all of them set to automatically re-size themselves within reason. To hell with it, all the adorable white, pink and pastel outfits were being shipped Dobby Express tonight. By the time they left Madam Malkin's, both witches were in high spirits. Harry was going to have to put more thought into the whole 'shopping can be fun' thing that girls seem to know about.

"Ginny! I did not zink I would see you today! 'ow are you... and your new friend? Miss Snape, no?"

Oh, bugger. Fleur _and _Bill were there. The girls were loaded down with shopping bags and wouldn't be able to get wands out in time. Don't panic, don't panic, don't panic.

"Er... uh.." Both witches failed in the 'come up with brilliant plan' department. Bill and his Angel both saw the panic begin to show on Ginny and Heather. They must not have considered that they would just bump into someone by accident.

"Please don't run off!" Bill started. "I promise, swear on my magic even, that we won't drag you off to the Headmaster."

Fleur continued the verbal offensive as softly and gently as she could manage.

"We will boz pledge whatever pledge you wish for ze chance to talk and only to talk. Bill and I suspect you 'ave a reason to 'ide, and maybe it is a good one, no?"

Maybe it was the general trust Harry had built up for the Weasley family in general. Surely Bill wouldn't ambush his own sister, right? Maybe it was the rather effective job Fleur was doing of looking innocent and harmless. Harry knew that if she didn't get help soon, she'd never figure out how to get free of the headmaster, never mind extending the same protection to her friends. Perhaps this would be a good time to rope Luna in. She'd ask Ginny and Hermione if they thought Nev and Ron were up for it or not.

'Heather' spoke up, "Okay, we are going to Grimmauld Place. You both know the secret, right?"

Bill yes. Fleur, no. Damn, they hadn't gotten goblin help to fix the wards yet. Hmmmmm.

"Bill." The two older magicals were beginning to wonder why Miss Snape was running the show. Since when did she begin using his first name if they've never met before? "Can one person dual apparate another into a Fidelius charmed location if the one apparating knows where they are going?"

What an unusual question. "The rider will be brought past the protections and will be able to see past the Fidelius from then on."

Fleur wasn't the French Triwizard Champion for nothing. She remembered Harry's letter, almost had it memorized really. It couldn't be, could it?

Now that Harry wasn't panicking quite so bad, she looked around. "Bill, be a dear and through up some privacy wards, yeah?"

Bill did so. This girl was really getting to him, and not in a good way.

"Kreacher."

pop

"Mistress calls for Kreacher?"

"Fleur and Bill need to be keyed into the wards. Can you do that, please?"

"Of course, Kreacher will do as Mistress asks."

pop

Both Bill and Fleur were shocked. Did Miss Snape have control over the Black ancestral home? Fleur went from being unsure of her hypothesis to 'bet the family business' sure. She didn't know much about Sirius Black, but she did know that he would _never _have given control of his childhood home to anyone named Snape. Bill told her more than a few stories about those two men and their feud.

"Everybody hold onto me." 'Heather' commanded. Lacking a reason not to, and having more than a few reasons to obey, they did.

-pop-

* * *

Albus Dumbledore, Supreme Mugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards, was not a happy Chief Warlock. The special council meeting began at noon and continued for two hours. Albus wasn't the only one that thought that the whole time was wasted. No-one on the council could find a legal excuse to punish Heather Snape or Harry Potter. Albus wasn't particularly interested in sticking to the letter of the law but the rest of the council must have all been Boy Scouts or Choir Boys before joining up. Damn them.

Technically, Japan was independent of I.C.W. control. On nine different occasions in the past, the I.C.W. tried to enforce membership through 'aggressive negotiations'. Not once did any of the enforcement wizards or witches make more than one long distance report. In fact, they all vanished mysteriously within hours of making contact with the 'enemy'. Every time.

The only silver lining to this problem was that Albus, as Supreme Mugwump, could require the silence of the council. When reporting back to his English associates, Albus would just lie about the I.C.W. position and no-one would call him on it.

* * *

Fleur, Bill, Harry and Usagi left the pensive together.

Fleur was taking it rather well, all told. She was hugging Harry as if the boy, who was now a boy, was her own distressed orphan. Ownership issues aside, he was a downtrodden orphan boy, er... man, and got several hugs from young witches who could not allow Miss Delacour to win the 'I Hugged Harry Last' game.

That evening, Harry wrote his letters and assembled a gift package for cuteness while a discussion raged around him. How do you defend yourself against the most powerful man in England? Correction, the two most powerful men in England. Luckily, 'Divide and Conquer' was already halfway accomplished.

"Dumbledore is a powerful man, Harry. He's the Head of the Wizengamot and the I.C.W. And Hogwarts, of course. With Voldemort making a personal appearance, he is back to being one of the most popular wizards in the country. Luckily, you are one step above or one step below him in popularity, depending on who you ask." Bill had an idea that could get Harry out of hot water. Maybe. "What you need to do is be public enough that he can't do something without all of England knowing about it. He's claiming now that you and 'Heather' need to be reigned in for the Greater Good. He's told everyone in the Order that you were mistaken when you ran off to China and that it was always about 'Heather' marrying you, not Severus. Get that out in the open, Harry. If we can get him to push the Heather Snape agenda out in the open, then we can follow that with proof that she's not a Snape."

"My curse and Usagi's being dead are things I'd rather not let the Wizarding World know about. I can't... I don't know.. leave and 'go get her' halfway through or something, can I?" Exposing the Headmaster sounded brilliant, but how? "Won't they insist that Heather Snape actually be there next to me if we are both under scrutiny?"

"Could we get another time turner?" Trust Hermione to think of a way to actually get both Harry and Heather at the same table at the same time.

"But you got that one from McGonagall. We destroyed the time turners in the Department of Mysteries, didn't we?" Harry had hope, but they needed more than that to. He put the finishing touches on his letter to Cuteness and pulled out fresh parchment for Ami. Luna's was already complete; mostly just a request for her to meet with them to discuss important matters.

Hermione replied, "There has to be some office in the Ministry that still has one. God forbid the Headmaster has his own spare. He would have already used it to get you by now."

Harry wanted to think that there could still be a way to bend time to get the outcome he desired. Just like Sailor Pluto would. Pluto!

"_Usagi!" _The ghost looked over from the pile of clothes her daughter would be wearing soon. It was so cute! _"How quickly can we get in touch with Pluto?"_

Usagi had lost track of the conversation, but she knew who the older Senshi opperated. _"If your house wards are blocking her now, she'll probably figure it out as soon as you change them and appear exactly when you need her. She's good at that."_

"_When you need her? We need her now. Love, can you find her?" _Usagi faded out of the room. Almost everyone wanted to know what Harry was up to. Hermione was about to start the inquisition when Usagi faded right back in. _"She's waiting on the sidewalk in front of this house! She's here!"_

"Kreacher?"

pop

"Master calls?"

"There is a woman on the walk outside, can you key her into the wards?" Harry didn't want to leave Hotness waiting out there too long.

"Master wishes a muggle be allowed entry?" This slight hesitation must be a remnant from his Black family service.

"She is not a witch, but she has the magical strength of a planet on call." Hermione's eyes lit up. She was going to meet a mahou shoujo! A Senshi!

"It is done, Master."

"Thank you, Kreacher." Harry didn't bother walking out. He would defeat the Fidelius for Hotness the same way Bill beat it for Fleur, with a hand around her waist. Harry must remember not to grope Hotness.

-pop-

"Setsuna!"

She was wearing a striking suit with a skirt cut just short enough to give a man ideas. Not that Harry had ever heard the term 'fuck me pumps' before, but those shoes were brilliant. Hotness looked over to Harry, smiled, and gave him a polite bow.

"Not the best of neighborhoods, is it Harry?"

Harry grinned at her question and bowed back.

"There is one last protection on the house that we have to get by. For that, I'll need to hold your hand." He held his out, palm up.

"Not asking for a tight embrace? Usagi's already trained you well. That was quick." Setsuna knew they had nine and a half seconds before the Order of the Phoenix team showed up. Plenty of time. She placed her hand in his. It had been a really, really, really long time since she had let someone else 'drive' in magical transportation like this.

"I never stood a chance against her." Harry willed them into the house.

-pop-

-pop- -pop- -pop-

"Damn, we missed them." Moody hated this little game of the Headmaster's. He should be out there tracking down real Death Eaters and busting heads. Not sitting in a classroom near Albus's office just waiting for the chance to kidnap a boy and his friends. At least he got to peruse a few of the restricted section's books he didn't get to the last time he was in Hogwarts.

"Let's go back."

-pop-

Remus turned to Tonks. She could see the question in his eyes and rolled hers in response.

"Look, I'm on thin ice as it is. Rufus is Minister now and he's just looking for reasons to weed out anyone who isn't loyal to him. Too bad he's not looking for Death Eaters half as hard. If Dumbledore sees me as disloyal, he can sink my career easy." Remus looked down at the ground, unable to come up with a new response to something they'd argued over already.

"At least get me some proof. I like Harry. He's a nice kid." She couldn't take this arguing much longer. It was tearing her apart to be at odds with Remus over a topic he felt so strongly about.

Remus nodded.

-pop- -pop-

As soon as Harry apparated back into the house, jaws dropped at first sight of his guest. It was a rare day indeed for Fleur Delacour to meet a non-Veela woman with looks to rival her own. Quite the turn on, oui?

"Everyone, I'd like to introduce Miss Setsuna Meioh. She is the Senshi of Pluto and might be the answer to our problems here."

Introductions were made all around. Bill was polite and gentlemanly. Fleur was warm and a bit touchy feely with the continental cheek kisses. It was just her being French. Maybe. Hermione was delighted to meet a mahou shoujo which could speak English and wasn't dead. Ginny's smile and greeting were a bit forced. Once she got a ring on her finger, she wouldn't allow Harry to even look at another woman. Maybe there was a spell for that.

"I believe you are putting something together for Cuteness?" Hotness had noticed the outfits Usagi had been cooing over earlier.

"Oh! Yes. Ginny and I went a bit overboard, but I can't wait to see her zipping around on the new broom I got her!" Harry was glowing like a proud poppa.

"Excuse me, but did you say you bought a new broom for a little girl?" Hermione's middle class upbringing was raising the 'reckless behavior' alarm again. Nevermind that she could ignore it when the situation called for Gryffindor bravery, but this was a broom for, judging by the outfits on display, an eight or nine year old. If Bill and Fleur hadn't come in with Harry, she would have asked about the little mystery girl already.

"I promise, 'Mione. She has her father's permission and it's a trainer, not a racing broom. She won't be falling off of this one. I got her training books to go with it." Harry expected that to sooth his closest friend's conscience and it did.

"I'm sure Cuteness will be ecstatic when she gets this present from you, Harry. She thinks the world of you and always will." Harry blushed and looked down. Ginny realized there was a girl in Harry's heart that she hadn't even met yet. It didn't matter how little she was now, she's only going to get bigger.

"So, Setsuna... we have a problem that I think you might be able to help us with." Harry was trying to figure out how to introduce Hotness to the whole idea of the public appearance.

"Silly Harry, you can stop trying to get your wording right. Have you forgotten so soon?" Her eyes were sparkling something fierce. Harry suddenly felt as assured now as he had before Dumbledore tried to take him at the shrine. "We'll have dinner together after the Wizengamot session Friday. I'll bring the girls over and you and Minako can play tour guide for the others in muggle London up until then."

"Brilliant!" Harry could hardly wait. Surely he'd suffer every tick of the clock until he got to see Cuteness again. "Please have Cuteness wear one of the outfits I got her."

This was a side of Harry that the other English in the room had never seen before. Fleur was pleased to see her fellow Champion in such good spirits but didn't know how out of character it seemed to anyone who knew him during the last school year. Hermione was almost in tears. She'd _never_ seen Harry so happy as when he thought that this girl was going to see him in a few days. Harry deserved this kind of happiness a long time ago.

Harry went over to a closet and pulled out a broom shaped box and some books. He was already completely at ease when he called out the next question.

"What are the odds on our plans for the day being interrupted?" He began to wrap the books. Hotness looked at the outfits they had put together for cuteness and began going over them with a designer's eye for detail.

"I foresee no difficulties in muggle London, not that you should let your guard down of course. You may want to be extra careful getting into the Ministry, but once inside you should be fine. You'll probably meet your Headmaster in the halls, but there will be little he can do in such a public venue if you openly tell everyone that you're there to represent your own interests along with Heather. She will be there. Remember, though. Talk to her, interact a bit, but don't touch her. You will be sitting next to yourself from the future, so lets avoid a paradox if we can." She had sorted through the clothes and pulled a few different pieces together. "There will be an attempt on you as you leave. I'm sure you must have expected that anyway. Surprisingly, it's not the Death Eaters. Some Order of the Phoenix members try to get a portkey onto you and Heather."

"Am I going back to the Wizengamot when I meet you for dinner?" Harry wanted to be able to prepare.

"No. That would be counterproductive. Better that we wait until Christmas break and send you back to Friday then. You'll have forgotten enough that playing clueless will work better than trying to memorize the whole of the session." Hermione was paying attention to the tidbits of knowledge from what must be a chrono mage or something similar.

"She'll have on this cream cloak. The cream dress with pink and red trim will look adorable. I don't doubt that the press will be calling her Kiki once she figures out how to fly." Harry snorted. Everyone else stood in silent witness to this odd tableau. Usagi wanted to know more about what's going on.

"_You're going to tell me what you're talking about later, right? I hate not knowing what's happening." _Usagi had put her shoes and socks back on and somehow figured out how to put a light sweater on over her blouse. She wanted to wear to her Sailor Moon uniform again, but that wasn't working yet.

"_I promise, Love, as soon as our guests are dealt with, you and I will have a long talk." _Pluto really wished this incarnation could see ghosts right about now. Still, from the tone of his response, Usagi had the young man completely whipped already. Pluto began to wonder how she did it.

With both Harry and Setsuna focused on present wrapping, Bill and the girls started to go over smaller details like staying in contact and defending against legilimency. Bill promised to get a good occlumency training manual for Harry and the girls. Fleur knew of a line of jewelry that could defend the mind. She gave a rather poor acting job when she pretended that it would be hard work to go shopping for necklaces.

Hermione was finally able to ask Setsuna a few questions about Senshi magic before the woman finished helping Harry wrap the clothes. The last question focused on how the Senshi lived the lives of muggles when not battling evil. Hermione asked this question just as Setsuna had assembled the stack of presents in front of herself. Pluto smirked and summoned the Garnet Rod into her left hand.

"Miss Granger, I do have access to magic outside of combat. All of the girls do even if some of them don't know how to access it yet. And now I must go."

She tapped the stack of presents with the key like staff and watched everything disappear. Setsuna made her excuses and farewells. After adding a final farewell in Japanese to the Princess that she could not see, she disappeared.

Fleur and Bill left after more promises to do anything they could to help Harry. Their floo was available to him at all hours, day or night. After a very full morning, Harry and his ladyfriends settled in for a late lunch.

After that much excitement in his morning, Harry settled in to write a couple more letters and maybe tackle some summer assignments from school. His eyes lit up when he found a temperature control charm that affected anything with a certain radius from the caster. That could be useful in Hogwarts and out in public. Harry was beginning to suspect, more like hope, that the curse was not hammering him now like it had in China because he spent so much time as a girl doing girly things on purpose. Still, if he could avoid any public accidents until passing through the gates of Hogwarts then that would be brilliant.

* * *

August 21st, 1996

The wizarding wireless set broke out of it's normal music halfway through lunch.

~ "We interrupt this presentation of Boils by Dancing Trolls for an important announcement. Dementors have been sighted in large numbers just east of Hogsmeade and appear to be heading for the town. If you are in Hogsmead today, please warn everyone you can to head indoors and find someone who can cast the Patronus Charm."~

Harry and three girls, one of them dead, looked at each other. Harry then looked right at his favorite specter. _"Usagi, dementors have been spotted again. Let's go clear them out."_

The other girls began to get up when Harry did.

Not this time.

"I'm just going to cast my overpowered patronus and leave. I won't even stick around for any Death Eaters. Let the Aurors do their job for once. You girls are all staying here."

"Oh really, Mister Potter? And how are you going to keep us away?" While Hermione issued her challenge, Harry ran his cup-water-cold spell-chain and turned into Heather Snape.

"Kreacher! Dobby!"

pop pop

"Yes, Master?" "Mister Harry Potter Sir calls Dobby?"

"My guests are under house arrest for one hour!" Harry pulled out the Scepter of Prissiness.

-pop-

"What?!" "Bloody hell, Harry!"

Heather Snape, with pink hair, red eyes, Oakleys on and Scepter of Prissiness in hand, stepped around the corner of the Hogsmead Post Office to find that the streets were deserted. Usagi began to fly a wide arc around the village to search for any of the dark bastards which have yet to make it into town. Thankfully, all of the townspeople seem to be heeding the warning and staying indoors.

"_Duck!" _Usagi screamed, just in time for Heather to dodge a stunner from behind. She rolled out of the way of two follow up stunners from another angle. _"It's an ambush! Cover's on your left!"_

Heather once more thanked God for Usagi as she leapt behind a stack of crates. Usagi was really pulling her weight here. She could direct Harry and was immune to enemy fire at the same time. Pity that the attackers, of which there were at least two, were smart enough to stay cloaked from her sight. Heather cursed herself for not bringing her own invisibility cloak with her. She would next time, if there was a next time. On the plus side, she didn't have to give herself up due to a hostage situation and retreat was a perfectly reasonable option.

Except that her apparition didn't work. Fuck. They've warded her in. Heather was beginning to pull her shrunken Firebolt out of cloak pocket when the Body-Bind Curse hit her from behind. Must have been more than two of them. Cue the evil mastermind…. now.

"You don't look like a Snape to me. And to be so ignorant as to walk into an ambush like that damn Potter brat you've taken up with. Well, I'll be correcting all of your flaws whether I fucked your mother or not!" Severus Snape removed the disillusionment spell on himself while studying the scepter in Heather's right hand and the miniature broom in her left hand.

"Potter won't be happy to hear you've given me his broom. I'm sure it will help keep my hearth warm tonight as I teach the both of you how to show respect to your betters." The greasy haired Potions Professor stepped in close to whisper so that only Heather could hear. "And when I say 'respect your betters', I mean that I will violate and torture the both of you in every conceivable way. The Headmaster trusts me to do what is right... and I'll be doing it right up your tight little arse."

Severus plucked the shrunken Firebolt out of her grasp, but could not remove the Scepter without releasing the binding curse, something he wasn't about to do just yet. Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks walked out of their concealment and up to the two.

Severus was about to pull Heather's sunglasses off when her ghost companion began shouting again. "_You're not sunk yet, Harry! You're in my body! If you can't use wizarding magic, use my power. You've already done it before!" _

Heather wavered for a fraction of a second until Snape turned to Usagi and began to rant.

Heather knew that Snape was a narrow minded git, but she never knew he was that much of a racist. When she heard the venom pouring out of that bastard's mouth, she found she did indeed have the will do the girliest thing Harry Potter would ever do. She embraced her love for Usagi and called upon the power of the Moon. Just like Miss Tsukino before her, she didn't need to be told the words. They just appeared inside of her head.

While the Poitions Master focused on insulting the agitated form of a ghost hovering ten meters away, Remus and Tonks both saw the golden glow appear on Heather's forehead and then continued to watch it grow to an intensity easily rivaling the noonday sun above. They were too blinded to see her move when the Body-Bind Curse was broken. By the time the Potions git had turned around to punish whoever would dare interrupt his dissertation on racial distinctions and behavioral patterns she was already joining the Senshi in the only way one can: a naked whirly light show.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!"

Heather, or Harry, or whoever the Boy-Who-Transmogrified was this time, began to do that silly dancing thing that the Senshi did back in that shrine Hotness took her too. This was without a doubt, much, much girlier than anything Harry had done to date. This wasn't just Heather Snape level girlie either. This was Magical-Alien-Princess-Super-Veela girlie with extra sparkles. A five year old Lavender Brown would have traded you a unicorn for the chance to do this if even if she had just gotten it for her birthday that morning.

"_Forget magic and punch the shit out of him!" _Usagi did not like this man. Not even queen Beryl or Wiseman had pushed her buttons faster. And he did it in English. Imagine how furious she'd be if they spoke the same language.

The newly minted Interim Sailor Moon shrugged off two Stupefy's and a Cutting Curse to drive her gloved hand through the space that Snape's jawbone occupied. Looks like he had about ten or twelve little jawbones now. Damn, that felt good! The cut on her side was worth it. Her follow up plowed through another pair of Stupefy's to introduce the hook-nosed toerag to the joys of kidney failure.

She was smiling through the pain when Remus followed her example by dropping his wand to grapple with her. Remus, while not receiving the power bonus of a full moon, was still gifted with more strength than most men twice his size. It didn't matter. She yanked her arms out of his grip and jumped to pick up the Scepter of Prissiness which she had dropped for the chance to re-arrange Snape's face.

When she aimed the crystal shaft in the vicinity of Tonks and Remus, Tonks made a spur of the moment decision. She dropped her wand and held up her hands. Usagi came up next to Sailor Moon with a satisfied grin on her face.

"Wait! Wait! It wasn't supposed to be like this! We were told to take you back unharmed." Tonks shouted desperately.

She hoped Remus was right. Albus may be the Leader of the Light, but this Snape girl was just trying to get out of a rather Slytherin ambush and she was winning in epic fashion. Tonks didn't want to see what this Moon Princess or whatever could do to a werewolf after thrashing so many dementors in only two spells.

Sailor Moon huffed. "Unharmed? You call that unharmed? Do you even realize what was going to happen to me once that greasy git told you two to go about your business?"

Confused and with a growing feeling of dread, Remus tried to answer. "He was to take you back to the Ministry to file for guardianship."

Remus knew this retrieval mission was a bad idea but he had no way of proving it to Tonks before they came down to Hogsmeade. He still hoped that the Headmaster and Snape would do the right thing by Harry if they got a hold of him. Remus wouldn't say anything in the open like this but he desperately hoped Harry could see how sorry he was.

For the past minute or two the citizens of Hogsmead were opening their doors to watch the strange girl and her ghost fight three grown magicals. She had a pet ghost? Look at her wand! Oh, Merlin! It's the Moon Princess! She's here!

The Boy-Who-Became-Sailor-Moon took a step back and pointed her scepter towards her own neck. "Sonorous."

She pulled the scepter down and began to speak for all of Hogsmeade to hear. After all, if public notice could be Harry Potter's main weapon, it could be hers too.

"Attention people of Hogsmeade. I, a Senshi of the Moon, who has been referred to recently as the Goddess of Diagon Alley do here and now swear upon my life and my magic that the following statements are true. First, that Potions Professor Severus Snape did cast Dark magic at Harry Potter this summer in the presence of Albus Dumbledore and the Headmaster did nothing to stop him. Second, that Severus Snape did just tell me that he intended to torture and forcibly sodomize both myself and Harry Potter as soon as he had us under his control. Third and finally, that I fight for Love and Justice, a maxim Harry Potter fully supports. So mote it be!" Without dropping the Sonorus, she looked directly into Remus's eyes. "I had hoped that the light wizards and witches of England would know when to do what is right instead of what is easy. It seems I may have been mistaken."

Sailor Moon cancelled the Sonorous, Accio'd her broom from Snape's broken form and apparated back to Grimmauld Place.

Two hundred meters away but well within the range of Sailor Moon's Sonorous spell, an old man pondered his schemes and how they could look to others. His Potions Master was apparently less reformed than he claimed to be. His 'cover' of corrupting the minds of Slytherin House and suppressing their school rivals in other Houses also seemed to be much more authentic and successful than it should be. The Headmaster had to suppress rumors of three sexual assaults last year by obliviating both criminal and victim. There were rumors of two others that he could not prove or act upon as the supposed victims had already been obliviated by the aggressor. Were Mister Malfoy not constantly held in check by Mister Potter, the Slytherin boy would have many more questionable notches on his bedpost.

Albus knew his path was a hard one. His chosen few champions sacrificed as much as he did even without knowing it was their lot to so. Still, dark families remained dark no matter how many pure hearted light witches were sold or tricked into bearing the next pureblood generation. Sons and daughters grew as dark as their fathers nearly every time; perhaps his great social experiments were not working as intended? No, the next generation _would _turn out as he intended. He had in Heather Snape the perfect mother for a Malfoy light wizard. Turn the Malfoys and others would soon follow, he was sure of it.

Now, how to counter that rather masterful propaganda? Albus could not possibly obliviate the whole town before news made it out by floo or by owl. No doubt someone was already trying to contact the Prophet. Perhaps he could tell everyone that she had not used her true name, thus invalidating the oath. He just needed to remind people that He was Albus Dumbledore and that Heather was not.

* * *

-pop-

"Hi, Honey! I'm home!" This declaration by a worn out and slightly soiled Sailor Moon was met with two wands pointed in her face.

"Who the bloody hell are you?!" Ginny's wand tip was glowing red. Sailor Harry Moon figured that Hermione would only select her attack once she fully understood situation, thus the lack of a glowing tip on her wand.

"I saved you from Tom and his bloody great snake, so put that thing down before I find some troll bogies to cover it with."

Usagi faded in next to Sailor Moon and told her how to revert back to normal. Well, normal for a Jusenkyo cursed Boy-Who-Lived-To-Be-A-Magical-Alien-Princess-Super-Veela-Chosen-One, anyway.

"H-Harry?" Hermione was caught between the desire to gape like a fish and the desire to demand details.

"We can all go to the pensive in a moment, but before that... Ow! Bloody fucking shite this hurts!"

Not being Sailor Moon anymore meant no magical uniform making all of the pain go away. After pushing Ginny and Hermone far enough away, Harry did what she had gotten really good at in Tibet. She pulled out the Scepter of Prissiness and healed herself. Hermione's desires to gape and to inquire both rose much higher, yet still they stayed in balance and kept her silent.

Harry spell-chained herself some hot water and became a bloke again. As he sat down in the lounge, sandwiches and pumpkin juice appeared on the coffee table. As he tried to continue the lunch that had been sacrificed for the Greater Good, he opened the floor for discussion, "So, I was thinking we could either get Luna to come here tomorrow or go to her place for a while. What do you two think?"

~ "We interrupt this presentation of Fire Heart by The Heliopaths for an important announcement. The dementor alert in Hogsmeade has been lifted. There are no dementors in the area. As a result the earlier alert, the Goddess of Diagon Alley entered Hogsmeade presumably to do battle with the the dark creatures a second time. Witnesses claim that instead of dementors, the young woman was attacked by wizards. One attacker was identified as Hogwarts Potions Professor Severus Snape who was accused of being a Death Eater before the first fall of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Before leaving, the Goddess, who also identified herself as the Senshi of the Moon, made a magically binding vow that all of Hogsmeade was able to hear. She swore against her magic and life that Severus Snape had attacked Harry Potter with dark magic and that Snape admitted his intent to sexually assault and torture both herself and the Boy-Who-Lived. Witnesses claim that she escaped unharmed whereas the Potions Professor was levitated into Hogwarts by Albus Dumbledore himself. And now, we return to Fire Heart by The Heliopaths."~

"What?" Harry challenged the fierce glares being sent his way.

Harry needed a nap. All of this fighting Evil really wore a person out. Unfortunately for him, two witches were each about to give him a piece of their minds. Long, loud, painful pieces of their minds. Twenty minutes into it, Harry began to wonder if letting himself get caught wasn't the less painful option.

**End Chapter**

Author's Notes

(1) This song is the one I envision getting interrupted in the Nippon Budokan scene. It is a Mini Moni song. Mini Moni is a sub-group of Morning Musume. While I don't listen to a lot of J-Pop, I consider this one song addictive.

REV 09/2012


	15. Scrimgeour's Wet Dream

Note: In case you have not noticed that I am a Monty Python fan yet, that fact shall become readily apparent in this chapter.

**Chapter Fifteen: Scrimgeour's Wet Dream**

August 22th, 1996

Harry stepped up to the front door of the Lovegood home as Hermione, Ginny and Usagi all held back a few steps. After spotting the door knocker she reached out to announce herself. Surprisingly, she didn't get the chance as the door opened just as Harry's hand touched the knocker. She started a bit but then quickly calmed down upon seeing a smiling Luna on the other side of the threshold.

"Hullo, Harry."

It was a very surprising greeting as Harry was in her blonde persona this morning and had yet to introduce herself.

"Harry, you already had a Betrothal Contract with a blonde moon girl. Why did you need to get another one? Unless…. Oh! Did you meet cousin Zoot? Dingo said that Zoot's been rather naughty of late."

"No Luna, the Potter-Lovegood contract is going to have to wait some more. What's this about cousins? Does Zoot go to Hogwarts?"

"Oh no. The twins go to a small all-witches' boarding school near Tintagel. Anthrax is known for its magical textiles program." Luna paused for a moment. "I would have gone there if Father had his way, but Hogwarts' library is a much better collection and Mother wanted me to follow in her footsteps."

"May we come inside?" Hermione was genuinely interested to hear about another magical school in England. Apparently English magical schools had a history of disgusting names. Textiles? Must be the magical equivalent of a further education college.

As the group entered Luna's home, Hermione took note of the odd tower that was the Lovegood home. A spiral stair formed the central core to what, if this floor was any indication, was a series of perfectly round rooms stacked one upon another. As the ground floor kitchen was a bit cozy, Hermione assumed that the tower wasn't wide enough for a more complex plan without magically expanding the inside space. As eccentric as Luna was, Hermione would have expected her family to use space expansion charms liberally enough for the inside of her home not to match the outside.

Ginny was reliving a few childhood memories. She didn't remember spending a lot of time here but there were more than a few games of 'Marry Harry Potter' played in the garden. Perhaps they would have stayed better friends if Ginny had let Luna be the bride more often. Okay, okay... perhaps they would have stayed better friends if Ginny had let Luna be the bride at least once rather than demanding the little blonde be the groom-who-lived-to-marry-Ginny every single time.

Harry was still trying to keep her emotions under control. After yesterday's verbal assault, she was a rather sad puppy for the rest of the day. Even giving Hermione an emergency broom usage class in the Grimmauld Place stairwell hadn't helped. At least Hermione could now fly well if she needed to. Luckily, someone saw Harry's depression and decided to save the day. Once everyone finally retired for the evening Usagi decided to help Harry feel better.

Harry thought she had seen just about everything. Magical castles, giant snakes, dragons and ghost witches were par for the course ever since he'd turned eleven. Apparently he was wrong. Usagi was the next level of weirdness given sentient form. Having almost-sex with a topless ghost was new. Then there was more almost-sex followed by Harry becoming Sailor Moon the very next day. That same evening Usagi decided that she would turn Harry's frown upside down with a personal thank you for defending her honor. She asked her hero to sneak the wizarding wireless radio into his room. Usagi had never seen a real stripper routine but she had transformed into Sailor Moon via naked whirly light show more times than she could count. That combined with some of her more elaborate attack moves could make for a rather unique if amateur strip routine when put to music and combined with her clothing removal trick. Harry desperately resisted the urge to get his galleons out and toss them at the bed under her as she appealed to his baser urges. That night, the ghost of his future wife paid attention to the lessons learned in two showers and decided to slow things down. Harry's brain melted quickly. Luckily, he had a spare and it was more than up to the task. She could deny it was sex all she wanted but to Harry that was fucking brilliant! That morning, Usagi talked to him in the shower but did little more than that. Maybe even ghosts can get worn out.

As Harry's brain tried to get back to the here and now, she tried to remember if he'd heard Luna's cousins' names before. Nothing. Well maybe she could start up a conversation on the one thing in the kitchen that really stood out. In the Lovegood house, that was really saying something.

"Say, Luna. What's that on the counter?"

Luna responded promptly to Harry's question. "Oh my, thank you for noticing. Zoot asked that I make a Grail shaped beacon for her to use this coming term. She may have mentioned a rather dismal lack of peril at Anthrax... but you never have that problem, do you Harry?"

Come to think of it, she never did. Hermione and Usagi both flinched at this question. Ginny almost preened. Usagi took one look at the 'Grail' and began to catalog all of the errors. Having used a Grail in her own magical battles back in Japan made her something of an expert in the field.

"No. Honestly, I could do with a bit less peril. I may have fallen into one ancient Chinese curse, but muggles would say that I've been hit by another."

Harry's response intrigued Ginny. "Muggles know of ancient curses?"

Hermione and Luna may have both heard of it before but in this group of friends Ginny was most representative of the typical pureblood English world view. If something wasn't part of the world of witchcraft and wizardry then it was a curio or a hobby at best. She didn't do it on purpose like many others though, it's just how she was raised.

"May you live in interesting times." It wasn't so eerie said by one person, but chorused by three in perfect timing, it was quite foreboding. Ginny parsed the phrase. Processing. Processing. Ding!

"It's perfect for you, Harry. You are the most interesting wizard in all of Europe." Ginny, bless her heart, had yet to see the downside.

* * *

Dark Lord Voldemort released his magical hold on the broken shell of a man before him. The poor fool had the misfortune of witnessing yesterday's Hogsmeade excitement from a good angle and Tom Riddle had need of the knowledge hidden inside this man's brain. Of course, simply asking for it politely wasn't the kind of thing that Dark Lords were known to do... and even a tortured man could withhold information or even get the facts wrong. Voldemort rather liked violating the minds of lesser men anyway so going in there and ripping out the necessary knowledge was really a win-win for him. But every game must come to an end and this one was no different. Two words and a flash of green light ended the captive's suffering for good.

He saw this time what Andrews had failed to witness at Diagon Alley: a golden crescent moon. He rubbed his own forehead as he considered the implications. This pink haired witch must have done some of her powerful light magic on Potter during that fight in China. Some form of spiritual or mental healing spell perhaps.

He remembered the pain he felt that night clearly. She _hurt_ him. How precious few could claim the same? Dumbledore never actually did serious damage in his duels as he was always trying to take the Dark Lord alive. Harry Potter had certainly caused more than his fair share of pain but that one strike by this 'Senshi' had easily eclipsed Harry's attempts by a very wide margin.

He would kill her. Had to really; someone can't harm a Dark Lord and expect to just walk away un-smote.

He would wait first. She was fucking around with Albus Dumbledore and none of his own followers could claim such a hobby. The only follower of his that had any talent in that field died in China.

Voldemort summoned Lady Malfoy. She would attend this Wizengamot meeting tomorrow. The old man was sure to make some sort of move against the girl and Voldemort so liked a good drama.

* * *

"...and so when I get back, Hermione and Ginny let me know just how foolish I'd been for not taking them."

Harry was rather enjoying her time in the Lovegood home. It was a quirky house that seemed to match the owners perfectly. Luna had shown them a few more of the tower-home's rooms, each of them a full floor and each unique in it's own particular way. And while Harry may have expected something unusual in Luna's bedroom, what she found there was quite the surprise. Luna had the beginnings of a new ceiling mural. From the other paintings and artwork that covered nearly every surface of every room in the house, she was sure that it would be a real eye opener when finished. True, it was only just started but when she told them her plans to paint all of her friends, three of them being her guests today, Harry really felt warm inside. Looking up at the unfinished mural, Harry smiled. Getting closer to Lunar was truly a worthy goal.

As Harry told her tale of bad headmasters, angry Chinese warriors and cuddly Japanese magical girls Luna returned to working on her Grail shaped beacon. Usagi's poor translating abilities kept her from commenting much on Harry's story but her experience with Holy Grails once again had her giving her two cents... or yen... or knuts. Whichever.

"_I still say I looks too cup-like. The Holy Grail I use looks more like one of those deco__rative Russian egg thingies." _Usagi murmured.

"_You must remember that it is a beacon designed to lure British men into Castle Anthrax. The cup shape is what locals think the Holy Grail looks like." _Everyone, ghost included, turned to gape at Luna. Since when did she speak Japanese?

Harry had been sharing so much with her that Luna wanted to give something back to prove her friendship. She lowered her eyes to the ground and spoke up again.

"When my Mother died the backlash of her spell upset a nearby potion cauldron. She was brewing a Chinese potion that a friend in San Francisco had given her instructions for. The brew coated me from head to toe for hours before father came home and saw what had happened. The the healers couldn't tell what it was or how it worked, so I was left untreated. It still affects me." Luna looked back up at Harry.

"To this day I can see things no one else can see and do things no one else can do. See nargles and other creatures that most people think I've just imagined. It's how I knew that the girl at my front door was Harry. I can speak languages after hearing a sentence or two. I didn't even realize how strange this made me until being sorted into Ravenclaw."

"Next time I visit Tokyo, you should come with me. That city is full of things that most English wizards would never believe in. You could fill a dozen Quibblers with what you see in a week there." Speaking of the Quibbler, Harry thought the Wizengamot session. "Is your father going to the Wizengamot meeting tomorrow?"

"Father's not allowed in those sessions. Only approved Daily Prophet reporters can watch the proceedings. You can imagine how accurate the reporting is."

They all silently agreed with her. All except Usagi that is, who was ignoring the discussion in favor of checking out Luna's artwork. Most of the creatures were odd looking by any standard but after seeing a couple of paintings that closely resembled youma she had fought before she had to take a closer look. Was that one a Pikachu? Totoro looked freshly painted.

"Would he be interested in seeing tomorrow's session in a pensive memory?" Luna nodded at Harry's suggestion.

Harry decided to use Minako's discussion technique and bounced around a variety of topics that meant little individually but proved that Luna was a warm person with a big heart and a love of animals both real and imagined. Under different circumstances Harry would surely have asked her to accompany him to Hogsmeade on a date. After sharing a lunch that Luna prepared for them without magic, Harry presented their hostess with a gift. Luna, who had only recently had any friends since before her Mother died, smiled through her tears as Harry pulled explained the history of kanzashi and showed Luna how to use her new enchanted hair pins.

As Harry looked over at her new _close _friend, she thought about tomorrow. The Senshi would be getting a guided tour of muggle London. Hermione would help Harry run the tour as she had actually done many of the touristy things long before learning she was a witch. Thanks to the Dursleys, Harry had never done any of that and would have been hard pressed to actually lead the tour. Ginny was going to see how muggles lived and also to protect 'her man' from Asian whores. The only close friends which weren't signed on to go were Ron and Luna. Ron was not yet in on the Senshi secret and Harry didn't want to have to deal with any jealousy issues during his Cuteness Time. Luna on the other hand had just been given a description of Harry's time with the Senshi and Harry could tell that she would fit in well.

"Luna?" The blonde looked up. "Would you like to go with us tomorrow? We'll be heading into London to spend the morning with the Senshi. We'll be seeing the sights and eating together."

Luna stepped close and gave Harry a warm hug. "I'd love to, Harry."

Harry looked past the fact that two pairs of breasts were crushed together and hugged Luna back.

After saying their goodbyes, Harry tried desperately to not obsess over tomorrow. He asked Ginny to run indoor broom races with him. He revised with Hermione. He talked about the stamps that he covered Luna's letter with to a confused Usagi. Sure, Luna could see things no one else could see, but could she see Japanese things no one else could see from way the hell over here? The stamps made much more sense.

* * *

August 23rd, 1996

"Bonjour, 'arry!" A beautiful Triwizard Champion emerged from the Grimmald Place floo. Harry was glad Fleur came; he needed distractions to calm his nerves. Usagi had done a phenomenal job of putting him to bed but he woke up to the fact that today was to be a high energy affair from start to finish.

"Bonjour, Fleur." Harry's greeting earned him a double cheek kiss. Thank god Ginny didn't see that. "Have you had breakfast?"

"Oui." She sat down across from his breakfast setting at the kitchen table. "I 'ave been teaching William 'ow to cook French dishes. 'e 'ad a rough time of it at ze beginning but my rewards for success are turning 'im into a master chef."

There was a sparkle in her eyes that he didn't always see. Harry tried desperately to not imagine how Bill put it there. Damn, too late. Beautiful women would be the death of him, he was sure of it.

"I bring presents today!"

Fleur pulled out three small wrapped packages. Harry had an idea of what they might be, but didn't want to ruin Fleur's fun. He looked at her hopefully.

"Go ahead! Open one!"

Harry did not have to fake his smile when a simple pendant on a thin silver chain was revealed.

"Is this an occlumency shield?" Harry began to look over the silver fleur-de-lys pattern with a tiny sapphire in the middle. Very French. Very Fleur. Surprisingly subtle. It was small and on a long chain. Harry could wear it without anyone taking note.

"Oui." Fleur answered. "One for you, Ginny and 'ermione."

"How much do I owe you?" Harry asked though his eyes were still on the pendant.

Fleur looked scandalized. "'arry, dear. I say I bring presents and I mean it. You pay nozzing."

The other girls were beginning to come down the stairs. Usagi wasn't around. Odd, she's usually next to him in the morning. Maybe she and Cuteness were plotting together back in Japan?

"I really appreciate what you are doing for us Fleur." And he did. He would arrange for her to get some enchanted kanzashi for Christmas. "If I handed you a big pile of gold, could you buy up any jewelry that helps defend the wearer from harm? Could you do that for me?"

Fleur smiled very brightly. "Careful, 'arry. You say such zings again and I may 'ave to take you as my lover!"

Hermione began to giggle at Harry's deer-in-headlights stare. Ginny, on the other hand, was seeing red. Hermione held Ginny's hand and began to assure her friend that it was only a joke. Well. she hoped it was a joke. Hermione knew that if Fleur had been pureblood Veela, the sentence would have been more of a promise and less of a tease.

"Ginny. 'ermione. 'arry 'as opened 'is present. Now you two do ze same." She pointed to the two wrapped boxes.

Harry snapped out of his stupor due to Fleur's prodding. Thank Merlin. He was about to say that Usagi was plenty good enough for him. That would not have gone over well.

Both girls put on their new pendants after the jewelry's purpose was revealed. Harry briefly wondered if his personal jewelry collection was going to make him look like a poof when he returned to Hogwarts. Two rings and a necklace. Oh, and his golden kanzashi. He just requested Merlin knows how much more. These things had better work.

Harry spent the rest of his breakfast asking Fleur how her job was going and how she and Bill were doing. Hermione asked a few questions as well. Hermione was re-evaluating the part-Veela woman now that she has seen how different Fleur is outside of Molly's influence.

"Au revoir, 'arry. We must have breakfast togezer sometime next week. Wiz luck, I shall 'ave more pieces for you by zen." Before Ginny could block her, Fleur gave Harry another double cheek kiss. "Zank you again for introducing me to Dobby. Adieu!"

And with that, she took the floo back to Bill and the Burrow. Harry had summoned Dobby earlier and told him that sometime soon, Fleur would need him to retrieve galleons from one of Harry's accounts.

* * *

Fred Weasley, sometimes known as George, Forge or even Gred, was walking down Charing Cross Road intent on returning to the Leaky Cauldron. He had been out and about looking for pranking supplies that most wizards had never heard of. Muggle things.

The twins had low O.W.L. scores due in part to the time spent researching and acquiring muggle chemicals and materials. They used this secret addition to their potions and charms work to make their pranks far more effective and far harder to detect. Even Headmaster Dumbledore had been caught once or twice since he and the other professors tended to look for magical triggers and traps. Simple mechanical triggers and what the muggles call 'MacGyvering' tripped up the staff every time. At least it did as long as the twins avoided electrical devices. Electronics never worked in Hogwarts or around Diagon Alley. Pity.

Fred briefly stopped his internal review of the properties of potassium nitrate when he spotted four rather pretty birds leaving the Leaky Cauldron together. As he got closer, he began to think that he should know these girls, but from where? Hogwarts? Luckily the four were going to pass right by him as he headed back to the alley.

Suddenly, he figured out two of them. Sure, they'd changed their hair a bit for sneaking around and such but they left their faces untouched. That left numbers three and four. Ah! Number three was a particular Ravenclaw who he remembered from the D.A. Meetings; she went with the first two to the Department of Mysteries. One more to go... could it be the much gossiped about Moon Princess? But where was Harry?

Three out of four girls were pretending not to see Fred as he looked them over. Couldn't have that now, could he?

"Ickle Gin-Gin. Lovely morning, don't you think?" All four girls stopped. Fred turned his bright smile to witch number four. "And who might you be? An angel sent from Heaven above to fight beside Ickle Harrykins against Lord Moldyshorts?"

He gave the new blonde an appreciative once over. She didn't say anything but she was blushing and trying to look anywhere else but at him. Gyffindors go bravely forward, don't they Forge? Yes they do, Gred.

Hermione and Ginny were both horrified at what was about to happen, but they couldn't stop it and they couldn't look away.

Fred stepped into Harry's personal space and looked into the eyes of a girl who appeared to be trying very hard to pretend she wasn't there. That's not how disillusionment spells work, luv.

"Don't be so troubled, Princess. I happen to be an expert at putting smiles on faces. Spend the day with me and I promise to give you a smile even the Dark Lord couldn't take away." Angelina would have said yes to that.

Ginny couldn't take it anymore. A loud snort was followed by the cackling of a madwoman. If Hermione hadn't succumbed to giggling herself, she would have noted how close Ginny's fit sounded to the traditional witches' laughter of muggle fairy tails.

Harry dealt with being hit on by a bloke in the only way she could. With a sports analogy.

"Sorry Forge, but we play for the same team. And while I'm out seeking snitches I bloody well don't want you chasing mine."

Ginny's mad cackles got much worse. Hermione almost pissed herself.

Fred knew he had somehow walked into an epic prank and tried to figure out what it could be. These witches all had Harry in common. Gin-Gin and Hermione obviously thought that it was incredibly funny that he should flirt with the new girl. Luna was smiling and her eyes were sparkling like mad. The new girl was horrifically embarrassed and acted like he should know her. She made a quidditch reference. Same team… She's a seeker. A seeker?

"H-Harry?" Fred choked out the question.

"Let's keep walking. Follow us Fred. You've just been kidnapped by the Moon Princess. Try not to be too excited about it." Harry moved the group along.

As her entourage caught up to the blonde, who was wearing Usagi's signature twin tail style today, Luna spoke to Fred. "Welcome fellow prisoner. I hope to be caught escaping sometime today. I do so love a good spanking."

"If you'll permit it, Princess Harry, I'd love to swear loyalty to your House. You might need help catching and punishing these witches should they make a run for it."

Ginny finally stopped laughing. The idea of being spanked by her brother was not a pleasant one.

Harry got down to business. "Fred, I won't have time to tell you everything just yet as we're almost there."

They were just two storefronts down from the restaurant he had re-entered British soil through, the same restaurant that should currently house a large group of Japanese schoolgirls on a special one day vacation. Cuteness was less than a hundred meters away.

"We're about to meet my friends from Japan. I trust you saw a copy of my letter to the girls?" Fred nodded. "Good. The Senshi, Sailor Mars and her friends, are in that restaurant up ahead. All of them." Fred was about to go on a naked-whirly-light-show fantasy when Harry stopped it. "If you promise not to prank anyone and promise not to go off and tell anyone about what you learn, I'll tell you all the juicy bits. You and Gred."

"As you command, Princess." Fred thought that this was turning into a fine morning.

One storefront down, the group of English magicals saw a spectral head pop through the restaurant's glass front, spot them and excitedly zip back through the glass. Four seconds later, a pink haired red eyed little girl in new robes ran out of the restaurant and sprinted right into her Magical Girl Daddy.

As Harry and Cuteness squeezed the stuffing out of each other. Four witnesses stood in silent wonder as Harry showed the world that this girl owned her soul. Dear Merlin, there was an undeniable resemblance. Save the hair and eyes, they were different aged versions of the same girl. Sisters maybe? Hermione and Ginny were both realizing that there was still much to Harry's story that the boy-turned-girl had yet to reveal.

After some light giggling and a high pitched squeal or three, the smaller witch stepped away from her Daddy and got fussed over for a minute.

"_Thank you for the broach, Daddy. It kept me warm at night."_ In her laser tight focus on Cuteness, Harry had forgotten that Luna would actually understand what Cuteness said.

"Everyone, this is Cuteness. Cuteness, this is Ginny, Hermione, Luna and Fred." Harry pointed to each of her friends in turn. "They are all good friends of mine."

Cuteness received some hello's and how do you do's.

Cuteness actually remembered Setsuna's coaching this time and dipped into a light curtsey, "I am Usagi Cuteness Serenity and I am ever so pleased to meet you!"

Just as planned, the slightly reduced name caused confusion but not the explosion that her true name would have caused.

"Does this mean that you are the Moon Princess? Is Harry going to marry you?" Fred was more than a little confused. He thought that the Moon Princess thing was some kind of prank after meeting Harry naught but one block back.

Harry chuckled as Cuteness made a sour face and said, "Eewwwwwwwwwwwww!"

"Let's go inside and meet the others, shall we?" They shall.

Inside the restaurant, the English entourage watched as a blonde Harry hugged eight more beautiful Japanese girls, getting cheek kisses from most of them. Usagi was jabbering up a storm right behind Harry. As observant as Luna was, she still couldn't get everything the hyperactive specter was saying. She did catch more than one phrase that made Luna blush. She never considered the notion that ghosts and the living could do _those kinds_ of things together. If Myrtle knew, would she spend more time happy? Would the meaning of 'Moaning' Myrtle change?

Luna saw that the little pink haired girl was alternately blushing and flinching at some of what could be overheard, but none of the other Japanese were reacting. Poor little witch was getting a very unusual version of 'the speech' unintentionally. Luna would have to speak to this dead Usagi later.

There was a few minutes of mixed English and Japanese 'I missed you's and such before Harry turned around and introduced the two groups to each other. After the two groups of friends were properly introduced, Setsuna paid the bill and guided Harry and the other twelve Friends of Harry outside to a small charter tour bus. As the only bloke excluding the driver on a bus full of beautiful girls, Fred was in Heaven. He'd have to find a way to get word to George at whatever their first stop was.

As it turned out, Charing Cross Road ended only a short distance from Trafalgar Square. While Fred went in search of a little used loo he could go fetch his brother from, Harry distracted the others by giving a short presentation on what little he remembered from the only history report he was able to finish and get high marks on before Dudley could sabotage it in some way. He spoke of one of his few non-magical heros, Admiral Lord Nelson. Like any proper British boy, he was an eager student of his country's military and Imperial history.

After the twins arrived, Harry found that the much anticipated problem of being interrogated by twin Weasleys never came up. Once the twins believed Harry was in fact who she claimed to be, they didn't waste daylight chatting up the Boy-Who-Could-Bleed-Monthly. Ami and Minako turned out to be much more interesting to Gred and Forge. Harry knew Minako could handle two Weasleys at one time but she was surprised at how quickly Ami got into the action.

Usagi was overjoyed that one of her best closest friends was _finally _showing interest in boys who were showing an equal interest in her. Usagi asked Harry what Ami was talking about so animatedly. The answer? Physics. Charms. Chemicals. Potions. No wonder! This stuff must be like porn for her.

Surprisingly, Luna was able to hold the attention of Rei and Makoto by talking about what it was like to grow up as a pureblood witch in England. The blonde spoke of dishes that cleaned themselves and fireplaces that you went to work through and mirrors that gave out fashion advice. For Luna it was all the simple facts of life but for the two modern Japanese girls it was a fairy tale dream come true.

Haruka and Michiru were occupying each other well enough without needing outside help.

Harry spent most of her time making sure Cuteness was as happy as humanly possible. Usagi, Hotaru and Hotness helped a lot in that department.

They spent time at Buckingham Palace. Every girl just had to get her picture taken with the Palace Guards, Japanese Senshi and English witch alike. Harry agreed to pose for a picture with the Guards, but only after Gred and Forge promised the same.

Of the whole group, only Hotness and Cuteness had spent any time with non-magical armed guards before. The circumstances were completely different of course.

There were also stops at Westminster Abbey and Big Ben before crossing the Thames for lunch at the London Eye. Harry made Cuteness promise not to fall out before she let her get on the one hundred and thirty-five meter high wheel. The local authorities would not be as forgiving of any rescue Harry may mount as those back in Japan were.

As much as Harry hated to leave the group, it was time for her to begin her trek to the Ministry of Magic. She would just have to see the rest of London with Usagi when the Princess was alive. Harry had heard that a lot of couples went to the London Eye just to have sex near the top. That sounded brilliant.

Harry made her apologies and said her farewells for a trip to the Ministry of Magic. She promised to meet them again after the Wizengamot session, hopefully before dinner. As Harry left the group Setsuna pulled her aside.

"Harry. Stay a girl until you are within sight of the Ministry's entrance and then find a place to change. We wouldn't want the Ministry to get you with an Under-aged Magic violation so close to the meeting." Setsuna pulled out a small crystal and held it out to him. "Take this crystal. It will act as a target for my future self to teleport to. Just give it a tap of your wand to activate."

Harry nodded and pulled out her spare wand and the Scepter of Prissiness. "I don't think I should be carrying these into the Ministry with me, especially if another copy of each may already be there."

"Perfect. Your past experience with time travel has driven home a few lessons, hasn't it?"

Having two Harry's there at the same time would be risky enough. There was no need to further complicate matters with duplicate artifacts.

Setsuna wished Harry luck and returned to the tour group. Harry hailed a cab. The entire twenty minute ride through the stop and go traffic of London kept her heart pumping. Soon she would be walking into the Ministry as a male and facing off against Albus Dumbledore. Luckily, friends and allies would be with him. One of the many lessons that the Senshi taught Harry was that while they fight alone when they must, teamwork should be used whenever possible. The odds in any battle got better when your back and flanks were covered.

One block down from the Ministry of Magic's public phone booth entrance, a blonde exited her cab and entered a local store. Five minutes later, Harry Potter stepped out and made his way over to the booth. After dialing the super secret access number 62442, he followed the simple instructions.

"Lord Harry James Potter…. To prevent injustice…." After stating his name and purpose, he hung up the phone and took the provided name tag. As the hidden lift brought him down to the main lobby, he pulled his Holly and Phoenix feather wand into one hand and the small crystal into the other.

When Harry stepped out of the lift, he noted that the lobby did seem quite busy. As many as as fifty or sixty people moved back and forth between floo connections and the guarded entry. Minister of Magic Rufus Scrimgeour (if his photo in the Prophet was anything to go by) was mixing with several older looking Wizengamot members right in front of the security desk. Before anyone could make a spectacle of The Boy-Who-Lived entering the Ministry alone, Harry tapped the crystal with his wand.

For all of two seconds, Harry remained alone. A fraction of a second after Minister Scrimgeour's eyes lit up at spotting Harry, his escort appeared in a tight ring around him. While the teleport made no noise, the spontaneous appearance of Sailor Mercury, Sailor Venus, Sailor Pluto and the Moon Princess was an eye catching event. All they were missing was the red carpet.

Harry nearly shat himself when he saw what he would be wearing to this event the next time. The Moon Princess was wearing a formal dress of pure white with silver accents. She was wearing heals, jewels and a tiara which offset the softly glowing crescent moon on her forehead. The Scepter of Prissiness was being held to her chest as if a symbol of station. Silver hair in an elaborate kanzashi provided braid sat above her Usagi-blue eyes. God but she was beautiful.

Only the knowledge that this girl was him from the future kept Harry from filling his robes with seed in honor of her beauty. When looking in the mirror, Harry never fully appreciated how good looking his Jusenkyo curse was because she was still him. Her. Whatever.

This was different. This wasn't him staring at a mirror. This was some _other_ perfect moon goddess. No way in hell would anyone believe that Severus Snape sired this Super Veela Magical Alien Princess. Perfect.

The Super Veela Magical Alien Princess allowed herself a small smile and nodded her head fractionally to the Boy-Who-Lived. Harry bowed low to himself and led the way over to the security station and Minister Scrimgeour.

"Good afternoon Minister. I apologize for the unscheduled meeting, but I believe introductions should be taken care of before the Wizengamot session today. My Betrothed and I find ourselves being slandered and we intend to address the issues before someone does it for us."

Minister Scrimgeour was doubly happy at Harry's introduction. Not only was Harry Potter being polite and respectful to him in front of a lobby full of witnesses but Harry was about to introduce the Minister to Magical Royalty. Looking at the Princess and her escort, the Minister didn't doubt for a second that she was exactly what Harry claimed her to be.

"A very good afternoon to you, Mister Potter." He vigorously shook Harry's hand. "As you pointed out, I am Rufus Scrimgeour, your humble Minister of Magic. Please call me Rufus."

Harry looked back towards his 'Betrothed' and silently asked for direction as to how formal or vague her title should be. Pluto, who had by now dismissed the Garnet Rod, leaned in and suggested that he use Usagi's full title. He noted that they had attracted quite a large crowd. Was that the Headmaster's hat trying to make it's way closer?

"Minister and members of the Wizengamot, I present to you Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon. I also present to you her Senshi guardians, Sailor Mercury, Sailor Venus and Sailor Pluto." The Princess gave a small nod of her head at her introduction. Each of the Senshi bowed slightly in turn without lowering their guard.

The Minister had also noticed that Dumbledore was trying to make his way to the group. Scrimgeour really didn't want that to happen.

"You honor us with your presence, Princess. Please allow me to show you to some more comfortable accommodations while we wait for the session to start." Scrimgeour pushed through the checkpoint and waved to the nearest auror. He wanted an official escort detail for his honored guests.

As the nearest auror passed him, Scrimgeour ordered the man to block up the security checkpoint any way he could for a few minutes while he got his guests away from crowds and Headmasters alike.

The auror, not having the luck of finding restricted items on the next wizard through decided to make the most of his order. The next witch in line was young and very easy on the eyes. Obviously she must be hiding dark artifacts on her person. A strip search right in the middle of the security station was the only acceptable answer. While many in line complained loudly, many others supported the auror in his work and offered to assist in the search for contraband. Headmaster Dumbledore allowed his eyes to glitter in frustration. Percy cursed his fate as he had been chatting up Miss Clearwater and was unable to follow Minister Scimgeour. Hopefully he would not be reprimanded for this.

Minister Scrimgeour brought Harry, the Princess and their guards to an executive meeting room adjacent to the Wizengamot chambers. While the room may not have that royal feel to it, the wood walls, floors and ceiling were richly stained and the furniture was quite elaborate. Of the eight magical paintings in the room, half appeared to mind their own business and the other half was openly admiring the Senshi and Princess. To be fair, beautiful women rarely enter this room unless it is to 'lobby' a Wizengamot member or two towards her family's side of a vote.

"Your Highness, let me just say again that I am honored that you would grace us with your presence today. On behalf of the Ministry of Magic, I wish to extend you every courtesy available. I would like to offer you an auror guard if you don't mind... you have your own guards of course but a few good wizards can help make things easier for you."

Minister Scrimgeour certainly didn't want such a high profile visitor to be snatched up by Death Eaters during his time in office. That would be a political disaster.

Sailor Hotness spoke, "In the name of the Moon Kingdom and of my Princess, we thank you for your hospitality. As you seem to be in the middle of a rather unpleasant civil war, we will see to our own security needs. Aside from Lord Potter and a select group of individuals, we cannot trust those who have not been screened. I do hope you understand."

The Minister did have similar concerns for just about anyone in the Ministry today, but wasn't going to admit to such a weakness here. He glanced at his watch which read 'almost late'. Under these circumstances, he could deal with arriving a minute or two after what was polite.

"I understand why Mister Potter wishes to defend himself, Your Highness. This charge of Dumbledore's that he left a safe environment and risked not only his life, but the secrecy of the Wizarding World is rather serious. But what of your presence? Are you saying that you do have something to say about Miss Weasley and Miss Granger?"

Scrimgeour really hoped she didn't. Even if she was not as pure as her gown would indicate, she was closely tied to Harry Potter and has gone on record against Albus Dumbledore. This was a political connection Rufus Scrimgeour really wanted to work.

"Let me put your mind at ease on that issue, Minister. Hermione and Ginny are willing guests of myself and Mister Potter and will be until they choose to leave us. I only sought to reunite Harry with two close friends, nothing more I assure you." The Princess took a breath. "The greater offense is that of my supposed misdeeds in our home country of Japan. A country where neither you nor the International Confederation of Wizards has any jurisdiction. I would have ignored this foolishness if I were simply to remain in Japan but when my beloved needs support I will always be there for him."

The Minister was clearly confused. Harry took up the story. It was his story after all.

"What Usagi means is that the local press believe her to be British. Shortly after we met, I allowed her the use of my broom. I don't regret it. I never will regret it. She saved the life of a very wonderful young girl who would have otherwise fallen to her death from the top of Tokyo Tower."

The Minister's eyebrows rose as he began to fully understand the situation. Dumbledore wanted to give custody of this young woman to Severus Snape. Worse, Dumbledore wanted to give custody of both the Boy-Who-Lived AND the Princess to the very man she claimed in a binding magical vow intended to torture and assault them both. This could be the worst fiasco to hit Magical England since the first rise of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Or... or it could be the greatest opportunity Rufus Scrimgeour would ever get to befriend Harry and push Dumbledore out of influence. He turned to his most esteemed guest.

"Thank Merlin you chose to come dressed as you are my dear. Had I seen Harry Potter and Heather Snape enter the Ministry, I may have been less cordial! Dumbledore has a directive from the International Confederation of Wizards to detain Miss Snape and Mister Potter both for violations of the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy."

Sailor Hotness chose that moment to speak up again. "I hope for the sake of both of our people that Mister Dumbledore is merely posturing and does not have official I.C.W. backing. One does not coerce the Crown Princess without consequences." If the Minister or Dumbledore wished to intimidate this crowd, they would have to do much better.

"Of course. Of course," Scrimgeour was beginning to understand that he was not going to have an easy time getting what he wanted from these people. Still, he needed to see what he _could _get. "I trust that you will not be supporting the Snape claim for custody? You do claim to be Heather Snape? Er.. that is to say that you've gone by that name?"

For the first time since entering the room, Scrimgeour saw emotion pass over there Princess's face. She turned to Harry and smirked. "It was not my idea but Harry's. Magical girls may be common sights in Japan but publicly changing into a magical girl is as bad for us there as using magic in front of non-magical people is for you here. I had to act, to use my power to save a young girl. I was not about to let her die, you see, but time and circumstances were against me. With no time to think things over, I chose to hide my personal magic from discovery by pretending to use a different kind of magic. Luckily, I had Harry's broom and I managed to both save the day and trick the public at the same time. Later that evening when my heart stopped racing, I could admit to myself that doing things the wizarding way was kind of fun so I kept it up. You could say it was an accident that grew into something much bigger."

Harry was more than a little confused. Where did this story come from? He thought she would be using vague truths instead of more easily defeated lies. He knew a blood test would show Usagi Tsukino but what about Veritaserum? What would it do to her? What if they asked for a magical vow?

"I see. Well, unless Dumbledore can produce an I.C.W. certified order for your capture, we won't have to find a way to protest it. If he does have a sealed parchment then I will simply move to have it dismissed. You've given me plenty of ideas on how to do that. You can count on me."

If Scrimgeour were alone with Harry right now, he may have gone in for the kill. A promise from the Boy-Who-Lived a.k.a. the Chosen One to support his office would solidify his hold on the ministry for years to come - as long ans the Death Eaters don't get a lucky spell in. He was risking that anyway, so what the hell.

Soon, perhaps after the Wizangamot session, Scrimgeour would tell Harry what his help would cost. Until then, these beautiful Senshi guards reminded him of an important Care of Magical Creatures lesson: The more colorful and attractive a creature was, the more spectacular your death would be were you to poke it with a stick.

Scrimgeour studied his watch. One hand pointed to 'get the lead out'.

"I can see that we are now fashionably late. If you would please follow me, we can join the festivities before they get the idea to start without us."

Minister Scrimgeour wanted to be seen as a gentleman and help the Princess with her chair. He wanted to but he never got the chance. The old man should have expected Harry Potter to help his betrothed. Ah, young love. Scrimgeour was sure that Harry would be showing his 'Usagi' more affection if the situation weren't so tense. Were a bookie nearby, Rufus would even go so far as to put twenty galleons on a public kiss before the end of the session.

As Harry and the Japanese Magical Delegation followed the Minister down a short hall to the Wizengamot chambers, Harry slipped in next to Hotness for a quick and quiet clarification.

"_I thought that I would be avoiding lies when I came back. What happened?" _Hotness smirked like she'd just gotten one over on him.

"_I told you the time line is still in motion, didn't I? Well, our plans changed a little. Think of it as an early Christmas present." _Harry felt a soft hand clasp his. It didn't belong to Hotness.

"_Love?" _Usagi nodded back to him. Before she could take another step, Harry had grabbed her and pulled her into a tight embrace. Burying his head in her neck, he drew in a long, deep breath from between her collarbone and braids. Merlin, she smelled fantastic!

"Lord Potter?" The Minister had a wide grin on his face. If he were Harry, he wouldn't have stopped at just smelling the girl. The three Senshi in the royal escort were going to have a lot of great teasing and gossip material for their trip back to the future.

"Terribly sorry. In case you haven't noticed yet, I'm quite happy to be betrothed to Princess Usagi." Harry's tension slipped away until only his happiness was left. Usagi's smile was brilliant. They reluctantly separated and followed the Minister.

Rufus Scrimgeour opened one last door. Through it, Harry and his Love could hear the loud buzz of a socializing Wizengamot body. There were what seemed to be over one hundred witches and wizards (mostly wizards) in ceremonial robes around the chamber. A handful of Ministry workers attended to the needs of the members and attempted to maintain order. Nearly everyone turned to see the Minister enter with Harry Potter and the much talked about Moon Princess. Those who had not caught a glimpse of their passage through the lobby were either gaping, glaring or leering depending on their political leanings and dirty-old-manishness.

Harry could hear several conversations in which the term 'Chosen One' being bandied about. There were also topics of conversation within his hearing range that were less pleasant. If he ever figured out who just said _that _about his future wife then that bastard was going to get a beater's bat in the wedding tackle repeatedly. Rather than scowling, Harry grinned. He had a pensive back at Grimmauld Place. Now he just needed to practice transfiguring random objects into bats.

Minister Scrimgeour offered Harry, Usagi, Pluto, Mercury and Venus some rather impressive guest seating to his right. While the background noise was still rather loud, Harry decided to address security.

He turned to Usagi. "_Love, should I still be worried about Albus or his loyal foot soldiers getting past you four as he almost did at the shrine?"_

Sailor Mercury leaned over to assure Harry of their safety. _"Thanks to your gifts and a little help from the Weasley twins, we__'re much better protected than we were. It's not perfect yet, but I'm working on new ideas and improvements every day."_

Venus chose that time to put in her two knuts worth. _"All this time without a boyfriend and now she has a matching pair. I tell you, it'__s always the quiet ones."_

Once Ami was off duty, she would blush heavily and tell Minako that nothing has happening between her and the Weasley twins. She hadn't done anything with either Fred or George romantically. Minako would ignore her and continue the Merciless Teasing.

Chief Warlock Albus Dumbledore was not about to let Harry influence his own future in any way. Mister Potter had wondered into Albus's second greatest power base and the boy would not escape destiny this time.

"Aurors! Detain Mister Potter at once! He is to be interrogated in private before this session can continue." Albus intended to get Harry into a holding cell and then charm the shit out of the boy until he meekly played the role assigned him.

Two aurors heard the order and moved to detain the famous teen. Rufus Scrimgeour wasn't about to let that happen.

"Stop! I'm the Minister not Dumbledore!" The aurors saw who barked out that order and stopped immediately. The Chief Warlock held their respect but the Ministry and therefore the Minister paid their salaries.

"I need to question the boy in order to determine the extent of his crimes." Blue eyes sparkled and a long grey beard twitched. "He has a lot to answer for. I must insist he come with me."

Dumbledore began to move towards Harry. He'd grab the boy himself if he had to.

The sigils on three mahou shoujo began to glow brightly. Pluto stepped into the aisle and summoned her Garnet Rod.

"Stop where you are Chief Warlock." Rufus was having fun! He must remember to send the Boy-Who-Lived a nice present this Christmas. "The International Confederation of Wizards may have directed you to retrieve the boy but the statutes state that it is _our _responsibility to punish him... if he indeed needs to be punished. I would think you of all people would take what is written in the pages of the Prophet with a grain of salt."

Scrimgeour had no fear of the Daily Prophet. He had the editor's loyalty so long as certain not-so-minor accusations were left un-investigated.

"Lord Harry James Potter, are you willing to answer to questions about your summer? To settle an old man's conscience?" While Scrimgeour was smiling at Harry, three Senshi and a Princess were glaring at the Chief Warlock.

Ablus was more than a little disappointed to find that he could not enter their minds and read their intent. Occlumency from these children? Enchantments on their jewelry was far more likely.

Harry chose that moment to speak out. "Minister... members of the Wizengamot... Lords and Ladies... not only would I be willing to answer a few questions but I could also swear to the truth of those answers and perhaps hand over a pensive memory or two."

If Harry was going to get some measure of freedom from bum rapings this year, he needed to at the very least show Snivellus for the bastard that he was. Becoming that man's ward would no doubt be distinctly unpleasant even without the whole 'marry Snivellus' angle.

"I protest!" And Albus certainly did protest. The truth was a delicate jewel to be controlled and protected as far as he was concerned. "Mister Potter's memories must be withheld from general knowledge for the Greater Good. He may unwittingly damage the side of the Light by revealing sensitive information which will no doubt make it's way back to Voldemort."

Gasps could be heard throughout the Wizengamot floor. The wily old headmaster spoke Tom's 'title' aloud in order to stir up the crowd. Shock them into action before things like logic and reason could gain a toehold.

Harry replied, "_Lord _Potter's memories will show this august body that you sir are more in violation of the law than than I am."

Minister Scrimgeour was ecstatic. The two most popular wizards in the UK were tearing each other up in public and he would get to choose which horse to back in this race. Albus was the only wizard He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named ever feared, true, but Harry Potter was the Chosen One. Albus ran Hogwarts and the Wizengamot but Scrimgeour really couldn't trust the old man. Harry had shown himself willing to deal with the Minister and was also capable of acquiring allies of Princess Serenity's caliber. It was not Albus Dumbledore who stopped the dementor attack at Diagon Alley after all.

Rufus Scrimgeour felt the winds of change and he rather liked them.

"I move the Wizengamot put it to a vote! But first... the session has not yet officially been opened." Rufus didn't want the old man to ignore today's rulings tomorrow due to some technicality like not officially opening the session. This would also give him time to judge the crowd.

Harry leaned over to Pluto, who had by that time dismissed her staff again and retaken her seat. Mercury and Venus were standing behind and to either side of Usagi's chair. Mercury was behind Harry and Venus behind Pluto.

"Suggestions? Am I going the right way with this?" Harry hoped that he could be truthful and still hide important things like Usagi's whole 'still dead' problem. Could her spirit be banished or something before he figured out how to bring her back to life? He thought it was likely that she could be.

Pluto answered him. "I would suggest showing them the truth about why you went to China."

Harry smiled at the thought of showing that one as the green haired Senshi continued.

"Try to remember if anything the Goblins told you could implicate him without Usagi being exposed. Your battle with Snape would be good. Don't show anything you did as Heather. If you need Heather Snape's memories, ask 'Heather' to provide them."

Before taking this trip, Setsuna had internally debated how much Senshi combat would be acceptable for the English magicals to see. Luckily, none of the girls were one trick ponies. A little bit of 'shock and awe' would show them just what it meant to disturb planetary avatars.

After the opening ceremony, Minister Scrimgeour immediately started a motion to allow Harry to submit his own evidence for the Wizengamot to review. A large number of Dumbledore loyalists voted against it citing issues of security. Fortunately for Harry, many light wizards wanted the chance to hear Harry Potter defend himself. The poor boy didn't get many chances to do that. To a man, all of the dark aligned members voted to hear Potter. Anything that put the headmaster in a bad light was good for their cause.

"The ayes have it. Bring out the solicitor's pensive." As one of the aurors moved to retrieve a Wizengamot solicitor's pensive, the Minister turned to Harry. "Would you be so kind as to descend to the chamber floor and take a magical oath stating that you will answer all questions truthfully?"

"I reserve the right to refuse to answer certain questions. I hope you understand that I will not betray my betrothed."

Rufus nodded solemnly. "That's all perfectly understandable, Harry. As long as the questions you do answer satisfy everyone's curiosity, I don't see that as a problem."

As Harry rose to leave their reserved seating area, Usagi took his hand again. _"Kiss me."_

"_As you wish, Your Worshipfullness."_

Harry bent over his empty seat and placed his lips against hers in full view of the Wizengamot. The kiss wasn't long or deep, but it was tender. With a smile, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Chosen One, He-Who-Has-Sex-With-Ghosts stepped down to the chamber floor and approached a stand which had been conjured for the pensive to rest atop. Harry nodded to the Minister who nodded back in turn.

Harry pulled out his Holly and Phoenix feather wand and began his oath, "I, Lord Harry James Potter, swear on my magic and my life that I will tell the truth to the best of my ability when answering questions and when I explain my actions without prompting for as long as I stand on the floor of the Wizengamot today. So mote it be."

With a soft light, Harry's wand acknowledged his vow before witnesses.

"Mister Potter. You will now list in detail every instance of under aged magic you cast this summer."

Dumbledore was not going to lighten up on him, was he? The Headmaster was about to learn that Harry could screw him over and tell the truth at the same time.

"I'll need a ruling from the DMLE, I think. I received no official owls this summer and I was lead to believe from my own experience that the Ministry was able to track under aged offenses." Harry paused for a moment when the Minister ordered Percy to check their records for owls to Harry this summer. "I may have had an owl sent to me for unlicensed apparition even if the owl never caught up to me. It happened on my birthday and was entirely accidental. If it pleases the Wizengamot, I will present an accurate memory of the event so that they may determine if it was legally excusable or not."

"I protest. Mister Potter is submitting a memory which is sensitive to the war and he knows it. I will charge you with Treason if you enter that memory into evidence, young man." Dumbledore could not allow this to continue.

"Perhaps the Minister could review the memory first to see if this is a case of treason or merely a case of abuse and child prostitution. For the Greater Good of course." Harry loved turning that phrase back on the old man.

There were many reactions to Harry's challenge. Many traditional light wizards were outraged that this boy would deny Dumbledore, much less make even the smallest of claims of wrongdoing against Light's greatest hero. The Minister appeared grave when he stepped up to Harry yet inside Scrimgeour's mind, he danced a Happy Dance the whole way over from his seat.

"Show me the memory, Harry. If you can't trust the Minister of Magic, then who can you trust?"

"Who, indeed?" Harry wasn't about to answer that one directly while under oath. He pulled the memory out of his head and placed it inside the pensive.

Harry backed away and allowed the Minister to bend down and enter the memory. While the Minister tested the evidence, Harry spent his time smiling up at Usagi and winking. Several distinguished members of the Wizengamot took it as an insult that the young pup would carry on so with a girl in public. More than a few were making plans to take the Moon Princess as their own. Her looks, her history, her obvious wealth and power were all desirable traits in a woman by any standard... so long as she learned her place, that is.

Narcissa Malfoy almost forgot her British Pureblooded upbringing when she first saw this 'royal' light witch. Many Ladies in her circle spent decades cultivating the princess persona only to fail but this Crown Princess shamed them all. Where was a poisoned apple when you needed one?

Minister Scrimgeour exited the pensive with an odd look on his face. One would think he were both happy and physically ill at the same time. He looked at Harry.

"You have more like this?" Harry nodded. "I'm sorry Harry, in your position I think I would have done the same thing. What Albus was talking about... Do you really want others to hear it?"

Harry hardened his resolve. "Yes. I ask you how letting Severus Snape have his way with me is the key to victory. Tell me that."

Scrimgeour paused for a moment. With evidence like this, there was no backing both sides to hedge his bets. He tapped the side of the pensive and stepped back as the Wizengamot chamber filled with the vision of a young man being told that he would have to become Mrs. Snape. The thought still gave the Minister goosebumps.

As the rest of the Wizengamot was eerily silent, Albus Dumbledore again addressed the crowd. "I am very disappointed in you, Harry. That memory is important to the war against Voldemort."

It was a sign of the Wizengamot's shocked confusion over what they had all just seen that only a handful of them reacted to the Dark Lord's name at all.

The Headmaster continued. "I have no choice but to press charges of treason against you."

"Treason against England, Headmaster?" Harry challenged. "Or treason against you personally? I put it to the Wizengamot that the truth is somewhat closer to the Chief Warlock committing treason against the Ancient and Noble House of Potter. Observe."

Before anyone could stop the Boy-Who-Was-Feeling-Vengeful, he dropped another memory into the pensive and tapped the stone just as Scrimgeour had done a few minutes before. For the next three minutes, a highlight roll of sorts was played out as the Wizengamot listened to Harry get informed by Gobsmack of Gringotts how Albus Dumbledore had claimed the Potter ancestral fortune as his own.

Even Dumbledore's supporters were worried now. Forget the whole Dark Lord/Boy-Who-Lived issue for a moment. The Headmaster had just been caught using his Magical Guardianship over the last surviving member of an Ancient and Noble House to empty the family vaults. Light and dark aligned wizards alike were scandalized at what this could mean for their own houses.

Augusta Longbottom was white with fear. If she fell to violence now, Neville would be in the same position as Mister Potter. She absolutely had to re-write her will in a manner that no politician could interfere with. Today.

Dumbledore stepped into the center of the chamber floor to address the issues. He chose to stand a short distance away from Potter and Scrimgeour, both of whom hovered near the solicitor's pensive. It looked like a duel for in many respects that's exactly what it was.

"Wizards and witches of the Wizengamot. What you have seen is but a small part of the whole picture taken entirely out of context. My actions and reasoning are innocent and true to those who know the real reasons why I do what I do. Ever since my victory over Grindelwald, the magical citizens of Britain have turned to me more and more over the years to do what must be done. I did not ask for this power, but I have it. I did not ask to be the only wizard Voldemort ever feared, but I am. Now today, you forget that it is my duty as Chief Warlock to ensure the rule of law in Magical Britain. It is my duty as Supreme Mugwump to ensure the rule of law in the world at large. It is my duty as Headmaster of Hogwarts to ensure the future wizards and witches of England are properly instructed so that they may assume their proper roles in our society." Dumbledore paused. The audience does not rule the speaker, the speaker rules the audience.

"Today you accuse me of wrong doings against the House of Potter. You who do not know the sacrifices I have made think that I could do this with greed and malice in my heart. I say that is not so. I do not hoard the gold of my wards. I the funds available to me to fund the light against the corruption and scheming of the dark. Does anyone here believe that former Minister Fudge properly funded the Aurors? No he did not. Does anyone in this chamber believe that former Minister Fudge would have added funds to other defence oriented programs? No. No he would not. For the last ten years I have been bolstering the D.M.L.E. budget and similar interests with private funds. I was legally entitled to access the Potter vault and so I used those funds to support light minded efforts. I would like to tell you how and where the gold went in detail to defend my actions but such things are secret for a reason. If Voldemort learns how I counter his forces then he could tear down all of my hard work."

Harry wanted to interrupt, but the behavioral pattern of years of schooling hampered both him and the Minister at this point.

"You also accuse me of child prostitution. Due to the war, I cannot answer in any detail why this is important, but I assure you that what I do, I do for the Greater Good. Only now Mister Potter has seen fit to ruin years of hard work by revealing this to the public."

"Your plan was doomed to failure before it ever started! I have proof!" Harry couldn't let the Headbastard pull his 'Holier-than-thou' trick to win the day. "While I doubt those of you listening today would trust the word of a Chinese village elder over the Chief Warlock as to the effectiveness of potions designed to get men pregnant, Severus Snape admitted to Usagi what his plans for the both of us were should he get us under his control."

Harry looked towards the Minister.

"I ask that Princess Serenity be allowed to submit her memory of the ambush at Hogsmeade into evidence."

Harry wasn't sure, but he took Hotness's advice to mean that he would give Usagi his memories of being Heather Snape at some point in the future. He had already taken other people's memories into his own mind so reversing the process should be just as simple. Albus looked like he was going to protest, but Scrimgeour wanted this point in their favor.

"Remember Harry, should she submit false testimony then magic itself will punish you. Vouch publicly for the memories of the Crown Princess and she will either be truthful or you will die." He said this as much for the audience as for Harry. They needed to believe her.

Much to Albus's chagrin, he could not deny the young woman who was even now stepping onto the chamber floor. The Headmaster would have to remember to draft legislation establishing Mahou Shoujo as a non-human magical being much like Veela or Vampires. These troublesome bitches would be registered and regulated into subservience. It would then be easy to restrict marriages to the creatures and restrict their breeding only to suitable families.

Usagi had come down with her full escort. Mercury, Venus and Pluto formed a rough triangle around their Princess while standing in the open. Pluto stood directly between Usagi and Dumbledore, staring into the old man's eyes the entire time. While Senshi disguise magic does protect against occlumency, Pluto's mastery of her personal magic allowed her to push one specific memory into the Headmaster's grasp. Of course he took the bait.

The Headmaster saw a massive battlefield. Two armies were clashing yet this was no war any living wizard or muggle would recognize. A vast hoard of what Albus could only describe as demons was sprinting and winging it's way into a horribly outnumbered army of humans who bore standards and wore uniforms that the Headmaster could not place. His view was drawn up to the light of a Full Earth in the sky above him. 'Merlin protect me, this woman fought on the Moon! When did this occur?' Only then did magical attacks begin to draw his eye back to the battle. Senshi. Two of these girls dressed in red and green in turn rained fire and lighting into the ranks of the demons. The inhuman creatures were slaughtered by the score. The tide turned. Before he could follow the rest of what must have been a truly epic confrontation the Headmaster was booted out of Pluto's mind.

Albus only began to collect himself upon hearing Severus Snape's voice whispering into the ear of an immobilized Heather Snape:

_"You don't look like a Snape to me. And to be so ignorant as to walk into an ambush like that damn Potter brat you've taken up with. Well, I'll be correcting all of your fla__ws whether I fucked your mother or not! …. Potter won't be happy to hear you've given me his broom. I'm sure it will help keep my hearth warm t__o__night as I teach the both of you how to show respect to your betters. ... And when I say 'respect your be__t__ters',__ I mean that I will violate and torture the both of you in every conceivable way. The Headmaster trusts me to do what is right... and I'll be doing it right up your tight little arse."_

What could Albus say to that? How could he possibly defend that admission? Harry is still alive, therefore the memory is authentic. While the Headmaster marshaled his thoughts, Harry pressed on. He was given extra support when Usagi took his hand in hers and stood by him rather than return to her chair.

"All for the Greater Good, you say. I would like to know how you define 'Greater Good'. Was it for the Greater Good that a newly orphaned baby wizard be placed with people who would keep him ignorant of his family, his history and his powers? I am the subject of a prophecy… a prophecy about me and a Dark Lord... and I clearly need to prepare for it if I am to live through the conclusion yet for some reason you keep sending me into the arms of people who won't prepare me for for this daunting task. My Aunt denied magic's very existence until the night Hagrid forced her to admit that she knew about it – knew about it and _loathed_ it with every fiber of her being. I myself was magical therefore she despised me utterly from day one and she didn't even have the decency to explain why. You, Headmaster, felt that it was in the Greater Good's best interest for me to grow up ignorant and neglected. Now you want send me into the arms of a man who would do everything in his power to break my spirit and make my life a living hell."

Harry paused for a moment to catch his breath and then he got right back into it.

"You knew the Triwizard was a trap – hell, even I knew it was a trap and I admit that I am not the brightest student at Hogwarts – and yet you sat back and watched as I walked right into one near death experience after another. A Death Eater taught us defense that year. He impersonated a good friend of yours for a whole year and he either fooled you or you knew about it but didn't do anything and of those two options I don't know which is worse. And then there is the Death Eater who teaches potions every year. You know… the one you want to give custody to? The one who has openly admitted to me that he will torture me if he does get me alone? In the muggle world, child abusers are considered the very worst sort of criminal - and yet you Chief Warlock - you pay a Death Eater to teach children and you try to hand over two of them into his full time care knowing full well that he genuinely hates both of them! If this is the kind of thing one must do to support the Greater Good then I'm going to have to figure out what this Greater Good of yours is supposed to be. I'm not so sure I want to support it. Not at the price you seem to think I must pay."

Harry was feeling particularly righteous at the moment. Thank Merlin he got used to speaking in front of crowds in Japan. Before then, he was always defensive and only spoke out when backed into a corner. Today, Harry knew he had to stay ahead of the game and prevent Dumbledore from suppressing the truth. He also had to admit that Minister Scrimgeour could have made things impossible but chose to make things easier instead. Politics. Hopefully it wouldn't cost Harry his soul in the long run.

During this last round of verbal warfare, Percy Weasely returned to the Minister's side with a small scroll in hand. He got a stern glare from Venus, but was otherwise allowed to stay by Scrimgeour's side. Rufus read over the scroll and handed it back to Percy.

"To set the record straight. Harry Potter was cited for accidental magic on the Thirtieth of July of this year. No owls were sent out. The DMLE is not actively pursuing Harry Potter on any counts foreign or domestic." Minister Scrimgeour took a deep breath and went in for the kill. "In light of revelations by Harry and Her Highness, I suggest the Wizengamot deny granting both muggle and magical custody of either one to Severus Snape. I don't believe for a moment that Severus Snape sired Her Highness and he has no right to her if he didn't. I also suggest the DMLE investigate Severus Snape. If he would abuse the Boy-Who-Lived, then no student in Hogwarts is safe."

Albus sought to rally his cause. "There is still the matter of the Secrecy Statute violations. Ministry detection does not reach across the Channel, much less to Asia. There is clear evidence that Heat- Her Highness... did perform magic in clear view of muggles in Japan. I believe that it is no coincidence that Mister Potter was in Japan at the same time as Her Highness was seen riding a Firebolt. She was also seen casting magic from a wand instead of the Scepter she is so proudly displaying today."

Albus needed to regain support. Turning Harry around by force inside of Hogwarts would be noticed by people like Rufus Scrimgeour.

"The International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy would place control and punishment in the hands of the Japanese if they had signed on to the I.C.W. They didn't. Mister Potter could have cast unforgivables into a crowd of muggles over there and we'd still have no right to punish him." That statement by the Minister got several wizards thinking about reviewing the I.C.W. roster and looking for unregulated territories. "And if you have an order signed by I.C.W. wizards other than yourself, then I'd like to see it."

Albus thought better of bringing his order out into the open as the parchment only had one signature on it. His. He resolved to plan out Harry's remedial lessons for the coming term quite thoroughly.

The Chief Warlock mechanically performed his duties and held the vote to dismiss Snape's custody requests. It was a show of Albus's power block that one third of the Wizengamot still voted in favor of his measures. As Albus was getting ready to cut his losses and close this disaster of an afternoon, Wizengamot Member Augusta Longbottom stood up.

"In light of today's revelations, I demand a vote to remove Magical Guardianship of Harry Potter from Albus Dumbledore." Augusta wanted to break any precedents that Albus set. Harry Potter acted every bit the Lord today and young Neville was more confident than ever this summer. She knew that this change in her grandson was due to Harry's influence. The Longbottoms owed young Lord Potter and in this act she could repay him.

Albus almost lost his composure when dozens of wizards, light and dark together, leapt at the chance to second the motion. Without any way to stop the vote, all he could do was his duty. The resolution passed by a slim majority, but it still passed. Almost immediately half of the wizards in the room made motions to adopt or become the guardian of the Chosen One. This would not be settled today.

"In accordance with Ministry regulations, a hearing on Harry Potter's custody shall be held at the next available Wizengamot session. The September session is currently scheduled for Monday the sixteenth. Any wizards or witches who intend to present their case for custody should be in attendance."

Albus took a deep breath.

"If there are no new issues to debate?" There were none. "Then I move to declare this session of the Wizengamot closed. Who shall second?" Dozens replied. "All in favor?" It was nearly unanimous. Plans had to be made and there wasn't a moment to spare. "Then I declare this session closed."

There was a large swell of voices as members moved to talk to each other and to leave the chamber.

Harry was feeling like he'd won the lottery. He wasn't getting bum shagged by a Death Eater tonight! He wasn't going to be forced to return to the Dursleys. Well... not by legal means anyway. He had Usagi next to him smiling at his good fortune. Harry knew there were still more battles to be won, but when wasn't that the case?

Harry gave Usagi his best smile. It was one of those Harry Smiles that Hermione so loved to see. Usagi's breathing went shallow. Harry's eyes began to sparkle when he noticed her eyes dilate. As more than a few Wizengamot members watched, Usagi wrapped her hands around Harry's neck and pulled him down into a deep kiss. Hermione had set the bar and Usagi was determined to remove that snog from his memory. She put her heart into it.

If Harry hadn't already decided to marry Usagi before, that kiss made up his mind for him. Usagi didn't _just _kiss him, she cut their initials into his soul and drew a heart around them.

This was Harry's first kiss from Usagi but it was not her first kiss from him. That would come later for him. Or something.

"_Did you just ask me to marry you? 'First Kiss' was in the contract, you know." _Harry was high. He had to be. Normal people just didn't get this happy.

Usagi answered his question with one of her own. "_Yours with me, mine with you or our first temporally matched kiss, Love? Time travel can be a tricky thing."_

She smiled and remembered being told that Harry was really going to come back himself... or that was the plan anyway. She hoped that the sands of time would just stop shifting on them. It kept throwing her for a loop. Pluto pranked her bad one day by waking Usagi up and asking if she was excited about marrying Ron that afternoon. They still talk about the glass cracking shriek Usagi let out. Crystal Tokyo could go fuck itself if she had to marry Ron Weasely to get there.

"_How long do we have before you have to go back?" _Harry didn't want to let Usagi go.

"_Not nearly long enough. Lucky for me I'm leaving you to go back to you. Yay, me." _Usagi tired to look apologetic but it just didn't work.

Harry tried for the sad puppy look. He failed. Usagi giggled.

"_I suppose I'm also leaving you to go back to you. Are we cheating on each other with us?" _

Usagi giggled a little more.

"_If you remember this, be sure to punish me for it in the future. Luna's right, a good spanking is really fun!" _Harry prayed to anyone listening that he remember this part. Maybe she'll remind him.

In the more relaxed mood of the post session Wizengamot, there were several camera flashes and one cat call in place of earlier murmuring about scandal and indecency.

"Harry. I must say you did an outstanding job on the chamber floor today. Should I be worried about you taking my place?" It was a joke, but Minister Scrimgeour was already considering the value of a mudslinging campaign against fighting the good fight should his opponent be the Chosen One.

"Not at all Minister." Harry was feeling to good to panic at being Scrimgeour's perceived threat.

"Rufus. Please call me Rufus. Shall we get out of here? The room is ripe with jealousy and I fear that some of our older members may be near death if their hearts don't slow down soon." Rufus turned and nodded to some aurors who began to clear a path through the stragglers. "There are things I'd like to discus with you Harry. Perhaps one day this week. Come by my office anytime, my boy. And no need to take Her Highness's time up with such things. It's just a little fence mending and strategy and the like, I assure you." Harry nodded. He was quite willing to enter into a vague relationship with the minister when the alternative was Albus Dumbledore. He knew which man was the greater evil.

If Rufus wanted something big, well then Harry had big plans too. Lowering the age restrictions on magic use during times of war was a good example. Reintroducing magic to the non-magical world was a longer term goal.

As Harry and the Nippon-Lunarian delegation moved into the Main Lobby their progress was tracked by just about everyone. Today, Ministry workers were gawking openly at the Chosen One and his Moon Fiancée. Even the Junior Wizard Reader's Harry Potter series of books in which he defeated a dragon at the age of three never had young Harry meet the Moon Queen, much less her daughter. Speaking of, Harry _still _hasn't asked anyone to explain that for him. One day, he might remember.

Mundungus saw them passing back through the wand security station. It was time to make the grab. Dirty and reeking wasn't a good cover but Dung still had the crowds to mask his presence. He actually had to look at his marks just to appear like everyone else in the lobby. Three meters. Two meters. One.

A sharp jab from the bird with long green hair sent Dung spinning. She hadn't even looked at him when she poked him either. As he tried to correct his squirrelly balance he reached out with both hands to try and find something to steady himself on. He should have remembered that each hand had one of a pair of pressure activated portkeys that would only go off if both were in contact with different people. Snape was supposed to get the matching set of teen troublemakers while Dung rode the portkeys as his escape route. Oops.

Dung looked in shock at the old auror and the blonde reporter he grabbed hold of right before the portkeys activated and the three of them were magicked away to Severus Snape's custom Anti-Potter Torture Lounge. While the auror had actually seen such places before and pulled his wand the Rita Skeeter panicked and began shrieking as though a hell hound were trying to hump her leg. Seeing Severus walk into the room and curse the auror only made things worse. Poor Rita.

Completely oblivious to the great peril Rita Skeeter faced, Harry Potter said his farewells to the Senshi quartet with three hugs and a rather heated kiss. Each hug and the kiss was lovingly documented by the Wizarding World's reporters with photographs and running commentary dubiously transcribed via enchanted quills. Harry hopped into a floo connection to Grimmauld Place moments before the Senshi went back to the future.

Harry paused in the kitchen a moment before he was going to head back into muggle London. As long as the tour group stuck to Hermione's schedule they should be walking by the HMS Belfast or on the Tower Bridge right about now.

Harry didn't feel like immediately running off to meet the group though. He was still rather... tense from being close to a living breathing Usagi for almost two hours striaght. Those kisses - he could still taste her. Harry could still feel how her hands fit in his. Her scent still filled the air around him.

He was terribly randy.

Before meeting up with everyone, Harry needed to retire to his bedroom for a short time to.. er.. relieve the tension. Maybe twice. Surely they could wait to see him until they got to the Tower of London, yeah?

"_Harry?" _Harry snapped around to see a ghost Usagi looking at him expectantly. _"Setsuna said you might be back, but you needed help with something before you rejoined the group. Did you.. ah.. need something?"_

"_You'd like to help me, Love?" _Harry really had to get Hotness something good for Christmas.

"_Yes!" _She was smiling now. He _did _need her!

Harry slowly looked up and down the ghost in front of him. He briefly glanced up the staircase before discarding that idea. He pinned Usagi's eyes with his. _"Take off your clothes, Love."_

**End Chapter**

REV 09/2012


	16. Sailor Moon Nukes London

**Chapter Sixteen: Sailor Moon Nukes London**

August 23rd, 1996

"I take it things went well then?" Hermione spotted an unusually smug Harry Potter leaning against the wall at the main tourist entry of the Tower of London.

"It was brilliant!"

Others in the Friends of Harry group started to gather round. As Harry had come back a bloke, those who knew about his trial took it as a good sign. When he broke into a shit-eating-grin, that pretty much sealed the deal. He was so happy that he grabbed Hermione and crushed her in a hug that pulled her off of the ground. As soon as he set the flustered Gryffindor girl down he was tackled by his daughter and Hotaru. If he was giving out free hugs then they wanted theirs before a line could form up.

As soon as Harry's hands found just the right places, he began to tickle the two girls relentlessly. Thank Merlin they were still outdoors or the shrieking laughter may have prompted the Tower Guards to eject them. Gred and Forge were sorely tempted to hit Harry with a tickling hex but both knew this was not a good neighborhood for drawing wands.

Hermione was thankful for the distraction. It allowed her get control of her face back even if her cheeks were flushed and her blood was running hot. 'Damn you Harry. When this day is over and I'm alone in bed, we're doing the Restricted Section fantasy again. And then the Head Girl fantasy... yes, spankings followed by oral sex it is.'

Hotness allowed things to go on as they were for a few minutes before mentioning dinner plans and reservations. Getting the hint, Harry allowed Setsuna and Deputy Tour Guide Granger to lead his merry band through the tower's grounds and into the exhibits. Everyone save Hermione and Hotness had been quite surprised to come upon the display for the English Crown Jewels. It was the first time that day that every single girl was silent at the same time.

Ohhhhhh. Shiny!

"_Oh! I remember that one!" _

Wait, what? Harry turned to Cuteness and Hotaru who were beginning to build up steam talking about a set of delicate tiaras. He was about to walk over to Ami and Rei when his daughter really surprised him.

_"I was playing with that one the day before I jumped through time to get here." _Cuteness told her best friend._ "And that green and silver one... that one's on Momma's bedside table. She likes to wear emeralds when she thinks of Daddy. I had no idea the thing was this old. I thought Daddy had it made for her."_

Bloody hell. He knew the whole 'rule the future' thing they were heading towards, but when did Harry get to pass out crown jewels as if he found them at the market or something. Okay. So now Harry needed to ask about the Moon Queen of magical fables _and _the Moon Queen of his own personal future. Hotness probably wouldn't say much, but surely his daughter may let slip a secret or three.

"That explains a few things."

Harry froze. Luna was right behind him and Cuteness had let slip plenty. "She has an odd feel to her like she was real but didn't belong here. Both at the same time. Her being from the future makes it all fit together like when you get the runic crossword done just right. Can I have a Scooby Snack now, please?"

"Let's talk about this over by Makoto and Hotaru. They don't know enough English to follow along."

Harry began to look at the scepters by Hotaru as not to seem suspicious.

"Where did you hear about Scooby Snacks anyway?" Harry asked the airy Ravenclaw. "They're a muggle thing."

The look of mild panic and nervous pacing wasn't suspicious at all. Not. Thank Merlin for a room full of priceless jewelry or he'd surrounded by curious girls.

"I'll have you know that Scooby Snacks are a vital food source for growing witches. You need something to go with hot pumpkin juice after smoking a big bowl."

"A _what_?" Harry had heard that term in muggle school. It never occurred to him that he'd hear it discussed by magicals.

"Big. Bowl."

"Sorry, a big bowl of what?" Luna is a Nice Girl. Nice Girls say 'no' to drugs, right?

"Cannabis sativa, of course. I think it makes for a rather pretty flower. Muggles should stop calling it a weed."

"You smoke weed?"

Come to think of it, potions class was rather like advanced chemistry but without all of the legal and moral penalties that muggles had. Harry's been shocked at what they were supposed to make in class and test on each other on more than one occasion. The Wizarding World lacked several important things that the muggle world had... things like research and development phases and safety procedures and health and safety standards. These ideas were completely alien in Hogwarts and the wizarding community at large.

"At school of course. With those Ravenclaw bints giving me a hard time day in and day out, smoking gives them the 'Loony' they come to expect and I get so happy that they don't upset me no matter how hard they try." Luna looked both ways before leaning in closer. "If you and your future bride would like, I can ask Neville to get you some for your own private fun. It's supposed to make sex better. Just look at the Weasleys and how many there are of them."

"Neville?" Harry was surprised. The Longbottom name was one he associated with light sided law abide-iness.

"Well, I suppose you could go to the apothecary but the Longbottom greenhouse has plenty of sativa. Lady Longbottom uses it to treat her aches and pains. Old age is catching up to the poor dear."

"And what of Dumbledore? He's quite a bit older, right?"

Harry began to wonder just how the Headmaster decided what was part of the Greater Good and what wasn't. Maybe there's a connection?

"He would use something stronger, I imagine." Luna opined.

Harry suddenly felt the urge to hold his hand to his forehead. "Suddenly the Wizarding World makes sense to me. All of the lawmakers are high."

"High? What does that have to do with anything? You muggleborn and muggle-raised types say the strangest things." Luna had a point, but only if you were a pureblood English magical.

"About all that strangeness... we need to talk about my future family." They had important things to discuss and Harry didn't want to spend too much of his time debating muggle morals and laws versus magical customs and traditions.

"Yes, I was a bit surprised at first when your daughter tackled you outside of the restaurant. You're not old enough to to have a girl her age. The ghost is her mother, right?" Harry frowned, but nodded just the same. "Don't be a grumpy lump about it, Harry. I could sing the truth about your daughter in the Great Hall at the Welcoming Feast thusly ensuring that no one believes a word of it no matter what kind of proof is put forward. Grumpilump. Hmmmm. 'Loony' can use that one."

"But there are two legilimens on staff. Dumbledore and Snape." Harry wanted to make sure the secret stayed secret.

"Five. There are five legilimens on staff." Harry's eyes bugged out. "Every Head of House is required to learn that skill to better control their students, not that they all use it. I may have been saved from persecution if Professor Flitwick had bothered to use the skill on some of the girls under his care. I think he believes it to be a breach of privacy to go snooping around in someone else's brain."

"Pity Dumbledore and Snape don't share his views." Harry had a solution to the possible security breach around his neck. He could get more necklaces from Fleur if he had to. "Due you happen to know occlumency?"

"Sorry, Harry. Occlumency is not taught openly to just anyone. Many families pass the skill down from father to son, mother to daughter. Secrets are kept better that way."

"I've got a mind shielding necklace on. I could give it to you and get myself another one. Please?" Harry turned on his puppy dog eyes. Luna eep'd and nodded. She wasn't going to say no anyway, but the poor girl's never gotten puppy dog eyes from a boy before.

Harry grinned as he pulled a thin silver chain up from where it was hidden under his collar. As he unclasped the chain, Harry caught the attention of several girls. You can't stay hidden in a room full of shiny things if you pull out a shiny thing and wave it around. As if sensing a disturbance in the Force, Minako, Ami, Hermione and Ginny all collected nearby. This in turn got the attention of nearly everyone else. Harry really hadn't noticed the attention until after he had finished clasping the chain around Luna's neck. Helping Luna straighten out her long blonde tresses afterwards didn't help matters at all.

"No fair Harry, I took you to a love hotel and I still don't have a necklace!" Minako saw a shiny thing. She wanted her own shiny thing.

"It's enchanted. She needs the protection it can offer." Harry didn't deny Minako's claim. He also forgot to deny the implication that he had bedded Luna.

"Well Ami has that four hundred year old book to remember you by. A girl likes to feel special, you know." Minako was pouting and Ami was blushing madly. Hermione wanted a four hundred year old book and wanted to earn it the same way Ami got hers. Ginny was going full-Vernon again.

"Fine. As it happens I'll be getting a good assortment of enchanted jewelry pieces soon. I'll set a good one aside and have Dobby present it to you all special like, yeah?" She smiled and nodded.

Luna looked down at her new necklace and smiled. She knew Harry wasn't claiming her, but a girl could dream. A girl could prank too. "Did you read the last paragraph of the Potter-Lovegood Betrothal Contract, Harry?"

That got everyone's attention. "No. Should I have?"

"It states that you have legal right to 'examine the goods' as it were. You can even deny the contract _after_. Care to try out the goods, Harry?" She finished with an exaggerated wink. Was that steam coming from Ginny's ears?

Harry was suddenly aware of the perfect storm brewing around him. He was surrounded by a tight ring of five living girls and one dead one who had either had sex with him, wanted to have sex with him or could be forced into having sex with him. As girls sized each other up, Ranma's 'when I was your age' stories came to mind. They all ended really, really badly.

Harry saw his way out and went for it. "_Hey, Haruka! I'll pay you ten thousand yen in cash or gold if you come over here and knock me unconscious in a single hit again." _

Cuteness immediately jumped in front of her Daddy and begged him not to do it. Luna began cackling like mad.

* * *

August 24th, 1996

THE PRINCESS AND THE POTTER

By Constance Brown

Sweet Merlin she was pretty! Who? Oh, right. Yes Sir. I'll be more careful with the Dicto-Quill from now on, Sir. Anyway, like, even on Diagon Alley I never have seen silver hair before. Her eyes were beautiful, of course, but what did you expect with the Crown Princess of Magical Japan getting the attention of the Boy-Who-Can-Shag-Me-Anytime-He-Wants. That's Lord Potter to you lot. With to die for green eyes like his, no plain bird could handle him, yeah?

Ignoring for a moment how flawlessly shaped and poised Princess Serenity was, she wore the most gorgeous gown that I have ever laid eyes on. It's sure to influence next year's robe fashions both here and on the Continent. Pure white silks and satins layered atop each other with a high waist line and a low neckline had Princess Serenity displaying her creamy perfect skin in Imperial style. Tres belle! Madam Malkin, sign me up for one this Samhain. And the diamonds. It's like she fell into a Family Vault!

Yes sir? Oh! The trial! Well, when Albus Dumbledore eats fiber, I think he fills the bedpan full of Greater Good. What part of 'Severus Snape get's to bugger the Chosen One' does he think the Death Eaters are going to be afraid of? What am I going on about, you ask? Let me tell you. Lord Potter and his Crown Princess entered the Wizengamot chambers under guard by three Naughty Ninja Witches and then Minister Scrimgeour had to block the Headmaster-Chief Warlock from sicking aurors on His Lordship. Not that the aurors would have gotten far; those guard girls may have been dressed like Arabian Night strumpets but they were dead scary when their head tattoos started glowing. I don't want to know where the green haired one kept hiding her staff. So, when everybody finally sits down or whatever and they get into this thing about how Harry and the Princess have been all naughty and rule-breaky halfway round the Earth and the muggles are going to find out or something and Lord Green Eyes goes and proves that Dumbledore is bat-shit crazy with this plan to make Harry join the pudding club and Potions Professor Snape gets to be the daddy. I almost threw up, let me tell you. So then we learn that old Albus had been taking all of the Potter Stuff from Harry's vaults all these years. Says he had a right to it, he did. I'm re-hiding my flying piggybank tonight. Sure Fudgie's been a right prat about letting the darkies get all powerful and stuff, but that's no reason to beat on a rich, sweet and yummy orphan boy.

The end already?! Bloody... and so the Headmaster goes home empty handed and the Perfect Couple go home happy. Oh, and a stinky old man tries to perv on the green haired one and she banishes him to Hell with that slag Skeeter and a crusty auror who might have been perving too.

For pictures of the Perfect Couple see pages 4 and 5.

For pictures of the Ninja Strumpets see pages 8 through 10.

For a rewarding career in Journalism see page 13.

"Kreacher?" Harry was smiling again this morning. Half of the front page was a picture of him and Crown Princess Sexy snogging after the Wizengamot session. He never wanted to forget that kiss.

pop

"Master calls?" Kreacher was bowing again but not quite as low as before.

"This is another good article. When everyone's done with the paper, I'd like you to frame the front page... and maybe the pictorials that it references back to."

"It shall be done, Master Potter."

pop

* * *

"...and then they exited the chambers. I remained to confer with my fellow Ladies in the Wizengamot lounges to ensure that I had not missed anything. The few conversations Potter and the girl did have were not silenced, but were in another language, Japanese I suppose. None that I know of in the Wizengamot speak that language, My Lord."

Voldemort stared into the eyes of Narcissa Malfoy and compared her explanation to her memories of the event. Luckily for her, she chose complete honesty. Better yet, she brought him good news. Dumbledore had lost badly against the dual threat of Potter and Scrimgeour. Had the Headmaster forgotten to separate his foes or had he failed in that attempt as well?

Voldemort was pleased to hear a bit more of the prophecy confirmed but knew that Harry hadn't let on enough to be helpful. Snape had given him a thorough explanation of the male impregnation scheme including the reasoning behind it the very night Dumbledore cooked it up. As Potter himself proclaimed, Dumbledore _was _more of a traitor to the Light than Potter.

To the Dark Lord, this new rift in the forces arrayed against him would be far more useful than a phrase taken out of context. Potter, his Moon Princess and the Minister of Magic formed a power block in open opposition with Dumbledore and the Order of the Phoenix. It should be allowed to continue. If anything, the gap should be made wider. In stark contrast to the number of wands that _could _be raised against him, the number of wands that _were _raised against Voldemort were remarkably few in number. Doubly so if they were pointed at each other. How delightfully pathetic.

How should he repay Narcissa's loyal service this time?

"Return to your home and continue collecting what gossip and information you can. Do not disappoint me." He waived his left hand and the door behind Lady Malfoy opened. She was beyond thankful that she would not be retained as a 'special guest' again.

As Lady Malfoy left the room, the Dark Lord noticed members of a planned assault group walking past the ornate double doors heading in the general direction of an assembly room. From an earlier briefing, Voldemort knew that the men... and woman... would arrive early enough to go get in the proper mood by toying with a group of captive mudbloods and muggles. Just as his throne room doors were closing, he could hear Bellatrix scream out the Cruciatus Curse and reap the expected scream in response.

* * *

The sky in front of her was clear for the first time in ten minutes. Maybe she had finally learned how to get the best speed out of this broom. Hermione summoned her courage and fought the cutting wind long enough to look over her shoulder for treetop pursuers.

It was bad enough that Harry had convinced her to run an 'evasion drill' between Luna's home and the Burrow. She now saw the practice for what it really was: a game. Hermione was fleeing insanely happy 'Death Eaters' on broomsticks. Harry would zoom past on his Firebolt forcing Hermione to dodge one way or another. By luck or design, these course corrections were all that kept the bushy haired teen from being tagged by Ginny or Luna several times.

Facing forward again, she spied why the 'Death Eaters' had stopped their pursuit. She had just crossed into fields behind the Burrow, buzzing Ron and Charlie as she blew by the edge of the back pond.

"GWAUGH!" Not the best greeting that Ron's ever meted out but not his worst either.

-SPLASH-

Maybe this whole broom riding thing wasn't so bad.

By the time that Harry, Usagi, Ginny and Luna made their entrances, Hermione had stepped off her broom and held Ron steady as Charlie cast drying charms on his younger brother.

"Bloody hell, 'Mione! When did you learn to ride a broom?" Ron was understandably upset. Why, she could have been on the team the whole time if she'd just worked on her quaffle passing skills.

"I learned how to ride a broom to escape Death Eaters! Or, at least that's what I thought I was learning to do. I'm beginning to think Harry's got what it takes to be a Slytherin after he tricked me onto this Nimbus."

Hermione tapped her broom with her wand and watched it shrink to pocket size. Ron watched with no small amount of desire as the broom found it's way inside of Hermione's robes. There were several things Ron desired in those robes and he reckoned that this could be His Year.

Harry took that cue to shrink his own Firebolt and pull out the Nimbus set aside for Ron.

"I know you got a broom when you made prefect, but this one is more of an emergency measure. It shrinks and expands with just a tap. Keep it in your pocket until the Death Eaters attack and all that." Harry held it out to Ron. He hoped his first friend wouldn't have a crisis of some sort because of these new brooms. Luckily, Ron barely reacted.

"These are for the DA then, yeah?" Ron wasn't completely ignorant. He noticed that everyone except Harry was riding the same model of broom. He took the broom and slipped it into a back pocket.

"Right in one. When we get back to Hogwarts, I'm going to set up a D.A. meeting so I can give out the rest of them." Harry had a light bulb blink on in his head. Ron must have had a mental Lumos at the same time.

"We're keeping the club then. Brilliant! I don't know who the DADA teacher's going to be this year but it's a safe bet that we won't like whoever it is." Good call there, Ron.

Charlie grabbed his little sister and made a Mollyesque fuss over her appearance. For the record, Gin-Gin's teeth were clean and there was no sign of dirt behind either ear.

"Should I expect a howler from your mum about airing Dumbledore's dirty laundry in the Prophet?" Harry was asking Ron, but Charlie was the one to answer first.

"Be thankful you didn't come any earlier! Mum had a right fit when she read that article by Miss Brown. Mum's a true believer in the Greater Good, you know. Oh! Make that two howlers." Harry went white. Sensing the reason, Ginny's face began to match her hair. "Her next rant was about foreign tarts getting their filthy hands on Gin-Gin's man!"

Harry's color quickly switched when he heard the word 'tart'.

"Usagi is not a filthy tart and if I do get a howler along those lines then your mum will be getting a howler of her own!" Usagi caught just enough of that to know Harry was defending her honor again. With a blush, she began to brainstorm new ways to kink up their private time.

Harry noticed that Charlie hadn't made any aggressive moves yet and wanted to get things out in the open. "Aren't you going to try and stun me and take me back to Dumbledore or something?"

"If Mum were still here, you may have had some trouble. Me? I've had a nice chat or two with Bill and Fleur. They both think the world of you. I hear that Gabrielle is beside herself with grief that she couldn't grow up fast enough to get you before this Princess Usagi bird showed up and branded you."

Charlie was relaxed and wandless through his explanation. Harry would be wary of portkeys anyway. Constant Vigilance and all that. Gabrielle, huh? Maybe he could get her and Cuteness to play together one day. They were about the same age.

Harry's daddy-thoughts were interrupted by Charlie's continued response, "I'll be patrolling Diagon on the next shift. Bill and Fleur are there now. An Order meeting's been called that I'll be heading to shortly. I'd put a galleon on everyone yelling at each other about the Wizengamot session and that Prophet issue." Charlie looked around for a second. "How close to the truth was that story anyway?"

"Miss Brown was much closer than Skeeter would have been, thank Merlin. She was off a bit, but got most of it right from what I remember. I didn't see what Pluto did to the perv, though. I also wouldn't put it past her to know how to banish people to Hell. She's scary like that." Sailor Pluto actually could banish souls to Hell if the circumstances were right.

"We should be going. I still need to see Fred and George's new store." Harry looked over to his best mate of several years. "Coming with us, Ron?"

"Merlin, yes!" Ron had been waiting for something interesting to happen all summer. "This house is a bloody prison when no one else is around."

* * *

Nymphadora Tonks needed a drink. She looked through dark violet locks at the man who had been close to buckling under her romantic pressure. Close until that damn ambush anyway. Remus wanted to support Harry. He wanted Tonks to do the same, of course. Maybe if her job as an auror weren't quite so politically vulnerable. Maybe if she had better proof. Maybe then she wouldn't have woken up alone this morning or the two mornings previous.

Tonks looked down at the newspaper that she had brought in to hide behind until the meeting truly started. Her eyes kept going over the pictures of Harry and 'Heather' as her mind tried to make sense of Harry's love life and her own at the same time. Pity that she was failing on both counts.

Several conversations and arguments which had been providing a background buzz stopped. Tonks heard the door close and looked up to see who could get that kind of reaction. Oh, right. The Headmaster. He-Who-Ruined-Her-Love-Life. The man walked in as if half of the room were not angry at him for lying to them. A few Order members who had attended the Wizengamot session had been defending the Daily Prophet article against those who supported the Headmaster no matter what.

Albus Dumbledore sat down at the head of the table and judged the mood of the order. Under his calm facade, he counted those who could be swayed with a good speech and those who couldn't. There was an unacceptable number of the latter. How unfortunate. He was sure to have more trouble recruiting now as well. Perhaps if he hammered down the biggest nail first, the others would be easier to handle. Albus turned to Remus Lupin.

"I suspect, Remus that you have a question or comment that you would like to start today's meeting with?"

Remus looked up from the table for the first time in fifteen minutes. His face was sickly pale and his eyes bloodshot. While the full moon was only a few days away, there was more to his suffering than a medical affliction. Remus looked into Tonks's eyes for the first time in days and watched fresh tears begin to fall. Without even looking at the Headmaster he rose from his chair and began to walk towards the door.

"This is an unsound decision, Remus. You would abandon the Light when so few stand against Voldmort? Against Greyback?"

Albus needed to get him into an argument. Smart as the werewolf was, he wouldn't win a debate with the Headmaster. Remus kept walking. Tonks jumped out of her chair and ran to the door just as Remus's hand met the latch. Albus smiled to himself. Hufflepuff loyalty was on display.

"I'm going through this door, Dora." Remus showed no emotion save sorrow when their gazes met.

She brushed a few tears off of her face with the back of her hand. "So am I."

Oh, dear. This was not the display of loyalty Albus wanted. Unfortunately Remus had opened the door before he could throw a locking charm onto it. As two Order members left their last meeting chaos erupted behind them.

* * *

"What do you mean 'I saw the naked-whirly-light-show-girls and you didn't?" Oops. Gred and Forge were giving everyone a tour of the shop when they went in for a little bit of brotherly teasing. "Harry, why didn't you introduce me to the Chinese magical girls?" Bugger.

~_We're Japanese, you prick.~ _Bugger again. Harry had almost forgotten where Usagi was hiding this time. She had meant to just hide in his nose the way Moaning Myrtle occupies a U-bend in the girls' loo, but found herself a better option. Somehow she got into his mind and was now going along for the ride in her new Harry Suit.

"_Japanese _magical girls. It was supposed to be more of a secret than that. We only got caught by your brothers in passing on the muggle side of the Leaky Cauldron." Please, please, please don't get jealous. "If Dumbledore had caught wind of my plan for the day, he would have tried to kidnap the lot of them. These are the same girls who fought him off with me in Japan."

"I still want to see a pensive memory of that." Watching sexy girls humiliate the Head of Slytherin and then the Headmaster sounded beyond brilliant.

"And you'll get that. I'll have Kreacher key you into the wards and we can go over some things. I still have to keep some stuff hush-hush unless you learn occlumency or start wearing a mind shield charm." He pointed to Luna who pulled hers out and showed it to Ron. He made a sour face at the thought of wearing a necklace. That stuff's for witches and vampires and poofters.

One row away, Fred was showing a potential customer a product or two when a small fire erupted near the Wildfire Whiz-Bang display. Concerned for the store and the lives of everyone inside, Fred hosed the flaming shelf down with a silent aguamenti.

Harry Potter's Jusenkyo grace period had just expired in front of Ron.

After a moment of thought, Ron came up with his best guess. "If they only met her yesterday, how did Fred and George figure out how to transfigure random blokes into a magical girl Princess?" Harry was shocked. Why didn't Ron react more than that? Harry then remembered what building they were standing in. Right. Overhearing the question, Fred had himself a wonderful idea. He and George had work to do. A lot of work if they were going to finish in time for the Hogwarts Welcoming Feast but what a prank it would be!

Harry was just about to start recounting the tragic tale of the Spring of Drowned Magical-Alien-Princess-Super-Veela when he got a rather unpleasant reprieve.

-FWOOMP- _CRACK!_

Out on the Alley, crazy dark fuckers in black cloaks and white masks were beginning to incite terror. Shopping crowds who had braved the undeclared war to walk amongst permanent patroni were caught in that narrow channel between buildings and either had to hide in a store or suffer. Some doors were shut and locked long before anyone could take shelter behind them. Selfish bastards.

"Boys! Turn around!" Usagi was pretty much screaming in Harry's head to transform and beat the Death Eaters down. Harry was conflicted. She didn't have a Senshi escort today and didn't know if the others were willing to risk Under-aged Magic Use charges to fight Death Eaters. Silly, girl. They were more than up to it if the looks in their eyes were anything to go by.

"Why?" Ron didn't see what help that could possibly be here. Fred and George had just stepped around the aisle corner after telling the register girl, Verity, and their two other customers to hide in the stock room.

Usagi jumped straight out of Harry's head in front of the boy and yelled. "TURN AROUND!" Shocked by the very idea that Harry had an identical twin ghost hiding in her brain, Ron obeyed.

Harry pulled her invisibility cloak out and handed it to Hermione. "Hold this, will you?" She nodded.

With her new wand in one hand and the Scepter of Prissiness in the other, Harry's masculinity was sacrificed for power a second time.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!" Ordered to look away or not, the shout and following prismatic light show held the attention of the girls and all three Weasley boys.

By the time Harry's transformation was complete, two galleons and five sickles had been thrown to the floor at her feet. "Not a stripper!"

"If this whole 'saving people' thing doesn't work out, Harry, you should keep your options open." Thank you, Luna. The English moon girl was responsible for three of those five sickles. Harry the Magical Girl reclaimed her invisibility cloak and stalked over to the front door.

"Mind the Hook-nosed Ipecacs! They are quite intolerable this time of year."

"The hook-nosed what?" Hermione had softened on Luna but the things she comes up with. They're almost some kind of code or cipher. Hermione would decode Luna just as soon as her House Elf Thesis was published.

"_Usagi, get up to the roofs and tell me what's going on!" _Usagi flew straight up through ceiling. Looking through the front glass display the local-made Senshi spied a pair of Death Eaters putting a couple of shuddering witches under pain curses. Usagi reappeared after a moment to report.

"_There's two in front of us, three at the end of the block and six or eight in front of the bank. That's all I could see outside." _

Harry considered her options. After dealing with the two outside, going after either remaining group would leave their backs exposed and they'd still be outnumbered. There's the whole 'kids versus adults' thing too. Hopefully having a Senshi would even things out until real aurors or Order members could try their hand at Harry's hobby.

"Everybody grab some pranks. I'm going to rush the two outside. We take them down and then head for a group of three or so down the Alley opposite Gringotts. Boys guard our backs and look for anyone sneaking up on us. Girls, I'll trip the bastards up until they're easy targets. What did we learn at the Department of Mysteries, 'Mione?" Whether she be a Japanese Crown Princess or an English Boy-Who-Lived, when Sailor Moon told you to do something, you did it.

"Stupefy was a bad idea. They just brought each other back out of it!" Hermione saw where this was going.

"Bone-Breakers and Reductors would be much more useful. Both require the attention of a healer." Luna saw it too.

"Don't sheild if you can dodge or get behind a heavy wall." "Unforgivables go right through Protego." Five points to each twin.

"Right! I'm going out!" The invisible Senshi opened the door and immediately jumped out of the way as Ron and Hermione tossed packets of Instant Darkness Powder between the two nearby Death Eaters and the larger group a block further down.

One of the two dark wizards noticed the change in lighting to his side and stopped his Crucio. The second curse was cut off when both wizards were banished into a brick wall. Dazed and unable to defend themselves, they had their wands accio'd by an invisible foe.

~snap~ ~snap~

The wand can't choose the wizard if it's broken, now can it?

Four redheads entered the vision of the two thugs and ensured that said thugs would not be picking up different wands anytime soon.

"Down!" Luna had yelled out the warning for the Weasleys as they hadn't noticed the three... no, four Death Eaters turn to face actual fighters rather than cowering shoppers. Two angry red spells and two sickly green ones passed the Weasley's well wide of their chosen targets. Before the Death Eaters could get another round of spells off, fireworks began to fill their end of the block with great pops and large gouts of fire to draw the eye and ear away from what was important. Luna and Hermione started casting curses into the fiery mass hoping to get one or two of them while they were distracted.

Thirty seconds later Harry found herself sitting under her invisibility cloak on a rooftop overlooking Death Eaters. Usagi's rooftop search for hidden targets was ongoing but hadn't turned up anything.

Harry knew that any second now the fireworks were going to fizzle out. What could she do that wasn't just raining more Reductos down on the Death Eaters? What could she do that 'he' would have been unable to match? Something big. Usagi's suggestion about throwing her tiara was discarded... and then a memory came to her from her time in China.

"Reparo." The spell hit a scrap of wood on a porch step. Instant tree. One masked killer was pushed head first through a brick wall when he got caught up in the rapidly expanding branches. "Reparo, Reparo, Reparo." Wow, that oak was huge! Harry would have to apologize to the property owners later.

"_Usagi!" _It was time to change their approach.

"_Yes?"_

"_Tell the girls the word _'brooms' _for me." _Usagi immediately faded out of Harry's sight and flew over to her allies.

Harry's first sign that casting four spells and not moving away was a bad idea was when she caught an explosion hex on the side. She found herself airborne without a broom and hit the ground arse first. Usagi flinched. She had come down off of a roof butt first more times than she'd care to remember. If the loud noise and displaced dirt hadn't betrayed Harry's landing spot, having the invisibility cloak half open certainly did.

Had Harry been an experienced Senshi, she would have known how to roll with that drop and jump out of harm's way. No such luck, Harry. Before she could get back to her feet, she caught twin Crucio's and a cutting hex of some sort from her new tree house friends. Their makeshift forest now worked against Harry by providing cover for a little torture party.

Usagi couldn't wait for Harry's friends to come here and save her Senshi stand-in! She had to do something herself if her Love were going to avoid a long hospital stay. Deciding on a course of action, the specter threw herself into one of the dark wizards cursing Harry.

Like the Imperius Curse, ghost possession was largely a contest of wills. While the wizard Usagi had chosen to invade was no spineless coward, he didn't have the raw willpower to match Usagi and lost their private battle.

As the Senshi of Love and Gender Issues shuddered on the ground, one possessed Death Eater stopped his curse and leapt bodily at the other man casting Crucio. As Harry's brain returned to normal function, the third healthy Death Eater in this group turned and cursed his ghost-controlled ally. Usagi flew out the man's other side screaming in pain.

"You're not what I came here for, girl, but our Lord has extended to you an invitation for dinner as soon as we could arrange it." With this statement, the last cloaked dark wizard reached into his robes and pulled out a rope. Bugger. Harry fought through the haze of her injuries for a way out before that portkey could touch her. Where was Fawkes when you needed him?

BOOM!

The portkey and the hand attached to it disappeared in a spray of tissue and blood. Were those little Cardinals circling her head? No, they were Weasleys on brooms. Harry rolled, grabbed her wand and Scepter before anyone could accio them away. With a careful leap, she reached the edge of New Diagon Forest.

On the plus side, all of her friends were up and about. Looked like the fighting was over. Yay.

On the minus side, Albus Dumbledore and about ten Order of the Phoenix members were standing a short ways off. I'll show you where you can twinkle those eyes, old man.

Fuck, the boys didn't have shield pendants to block their minds. With no small amount of relief she saw that the Weasley brothers were avoiding the Headmaster's gaze. Thank you girls, whichever one of you clued them in.

"I do believe, young lady, that I have a rather strong case for Under-aged Magic Use. You'll be coming with me this time." Albus took a step forward. Usagi jumped back inside of Harry's head and began whispering her support.

"You are not an auror, sir. In fact, I don't see any of those around. Does Rufus know that you're threatening a Foreign Royal Diplomat?" Albus took another step.

"He is too busy running the Ministry to lead this war." Another step. Harry matched his step with one of her own bringing her even with Hermione and Ginny. The lack of aurors was fairly disturbing. Rufus would have to have a good explanation for that one if he wanted Harry's support.

_~Harry, these are the people that taught you, right? You're not going to try winning with what you learned in their school, right?~ _When Usagi put it that way, it did sound kind of foolish.

_~I could use some inspiration, Love. This is kind of your thing I'm doing here.~ _The Sword of Griffindor was in Albus's office right now. Fawkes was on the other team, as it were. She already had a disembodied voice in her head and didn't think she could handle the Sorting Hat today anyway.

"And Mister 'I-Have-Three-Jobs' Dumbledore has time for a fourth?" He was within two meters of her. Was that a flinch?

"Protego!" Casting with her wand now left the Scepter free to do far stronger magics.

Dumbledore stared at the wand being held by the Moon Princess. For a brief moment, he lost his smile. When did she get that off of Potter?

_~My strongest magic always came from the heart, Harry. In my heart, I willed the corrupted citizens of Tokyo to be purified and they were. When you used my powers on Kreacher, your desire to heal his mind came from your heart.~_

_~What about apparating clear across Earth to pull you out of an enchanted spring? Does that count?~ _Accidental magic of any sort didn't come from the mind, did it? Instincts? Could all accidental magic come 'from the heart'?

_~Perhaps your heart felt that it was endangered by the Professor and reacted by taking you to the one person that could fill you with love forever?~ _If disembodied voices could blush, Usagi would be doing that right now. _~How about your Headmaster, what does your heart want to do about him?~_

Albus re-applied his smile. "Is this how you greet your Betrothed's school Headmaster? I do believe that we will have to work on your trust issues."

_~My heart wants him to be the light wizard he claims to be. I want to trust the old man but I just can't.~ _Harry didn't want to fight with Albus; not here and not in the castle on the First.

_~My heart belongs to you now, Harry. I want what you want. Make your stand, Love, and I will stand with you. Not that we would be standing alone either. Look around you.~ _Harry did. Hermione. Ron. Ginny. Luna. Fred. George. Bill. Fleur. They were all here for Harry. They stood for what he stood for too.

While the Weasley boys would be in need of tuxedos and top hats for their supporting roles, the girls would look oh-my-god hot in sailor fukus like what the Senshi wore. Harry set that image aside for further study and got back into the proper mood.

With the unusual confrontation playing out, only six people were ready to cast NOW: Harry, Albus, Snape, Moody, Bill and Fleur. Moody was uncomfortably aware that two of their own were positioned to cast at him and Snape, not at the girl. Most of the Order members present as well as all of the other teens were frozen between raising their own wands and wondering out loud why such a fight was necessary. We're all light wizards and witches here, right?

"I believe, Headmaster, that you need to work on your chemical dependencies. It just so happens I'm quite good at healing and purification magic. You could call it a family specialty." Harry winked at the Headmaster and held her Scepter high in the air.

She didn't call out any phrase. As Sailor Moon, Harry didn't need to. Sailor Moon opened her heart and in doing so avoided the light/dark potential of her magical core. The English Senshi instead released the pure white magic of her and Usagi's hearts into the Scepter of Prissiness. The Scepter channeled and focused their will in the form of cast magic.

If you were to ask a muggleborn like Miss Granger or a Halfblood like Miss Tonks what happened in that little section of Diagon Alley that Saturday shortly before lunch, they might tell you that Sailor Moon dropped a white magic nuke on Dumbledore without trying to get out of the way first. She did it without letting anyone get out of the way.

As it was pure white magic, the wall of power washing over everyone present barely tickled some of the happier and healthier witnesses. Grievous injuries were healed for both those who stood out in the open and for the frightened citizens huddled in cupboards. It didn't matter if you were behind brick or glass, hiding under bed or bleeding on the cobblestone alleyway. The white magic wave swept down Diagon Alley going as far as the battlefield near Gringotts. Magic finally crested and broke over Goblin made doors. Fourteen aurors and thirty-two random victims who had been seriously wounded by Death Eater attack were healed instantly.

Albus Dumbledore held his head in his hands as if suffering a migraine headache. Severus Snape was on his back on the ground shaking as if he'd just been electrocuted. The Death Eater who had been about to portkey Harry out earlier was staring into space and reaching for an invisible _something _with his brand new right hand.

Remus Lupin shakily got to his feet outside of Weasley Wizarding Wheezes. Dora gave what support she could while still being unsure of what they had just encountered. The couple was late to the party, true, but they had to stop by her place to get a quick make-up shag out of the way before going back out to beg for Harry's forgiveness.

"'Mione?" The bushy-haired girl turned to see a very tired looking Sailor Moon, half invisible and with a magical focus tightly gripped in each hand, sitting on her ass and swaying in an invisible breeze.

"Yes, H- Princess?" She could always claim that she was about to say 'Heather'.

"I'm tired. Can we go home now?" The Senshi looked like she could be defeated by a five year old at the moment. Grimmauld Place and a secure bed for Harry seemed like a really good idea. They could come back to Diagon Alley another day.

_~You did great, Harry. I'm so very proud of you.~ _Usagi felt Harry touch his heart to hers at that precise moment when power was called for. Accepting the twin links of blood and spirit released Harry's full potential. Freed of any restrictions, Harry delivered a block swallowing wall of power instead of the Coot-Smasher she had been looking for.

_~I think I overshot the mark a bit, Love. We're sure to hear about this in the Prophet tomorrow. And all of my friends will be called up on Under-aged magic use. Bugger.~_

"Come on, Princess. Let's take the floo at Fred and George's place. I'll help you through." Hermione and Ginny both took a magical girl arm in hand and lead Harry to safety. The other teens formed a protective circle around Harry, Hermione and Ginny while Bill and Fleur followed them as a rear guard.

Luckily, the last half-block was uneventful. Uneventful if you didn't count the random witch or wizard coming out of hiding to survey the damage, that is. One look at the odd group entering the magical pranking store was enough get people excited. As the tired Senshi passed by, locals began running to turn on their wizarding wireless sets or to floo call friends or the Daily Prophet's office. Whatever just happened, it was _big_.

As everyone filed in to the back of the prank shop, Luna picked up two galleons and five sickles that had been laying on the floor. Harry earned that and she should get to keep it.

* * *

Little Usagi, Cuteness to her friends and family, was starting to get annoyed.

For the third time in a row, she picked a lovely spot in the park for her lunch only to be bothered by strangers. Without Hotaru or Setsuna to keep her company today, she was a bit more careful about who she got too close to.

"_Excuse me, Miss!" _Stupid past. Nobody interrupted Usagi during lunch in her time. True, she usually ate in a palace surrounded by attendants and guards but they were all super polite.

"_Go away! I'm not allowed to talk to strangers." _She really wanted to finish her turkey sandwich before moving again.

"_Well, my name is Nabiki. Tell me your name and we won't be strangers anymore." _A young woman with close cropped black hair and brown eyes knelt down in front of her. She was holding a phone or something. Well, it fit in her hand, so what else could it have been?

"_I don't know…" _Maybe she could just ignore this one until she finished her lunch. Usagi was supposed to be wary of strange men and this lady didn't look scary in her clean skirt and jacket. You could never tell, though.

"_I just want to ask you about that adorable outfit you're wearing, honey. You looked like you stepped out of a picture book." _Well… Usagi _was _proud of her new witch robes, otherwise she wouldn't have worn them out to the park today.

"_Daddy just sent me some new outfits. He picked really good too. I think he had help from a girl though. It all matches and you know what boys are like." _Of course she would. She's a grown-up girl.

Nabiki smiled and adjusted her skirt on the edge of Usagi's blanket_. "I sure do know what boys are like." _She looked around for a moment before leaning in as if she had a secret to tell. _"I knew this boy in school. I thought he was really cute, but he always wore Chinese tops and loose pants. I almost never saw him wear a t-shirt or anything dressy." _Usagi giggled. That sounded like someone she knew.

"_I have a niece, not as old as you, but she would look so pretty wearing a dress like yours. Can you tell me where your Daddy got it?"_

"_Diagon Al- err… England. He got this in a little shop in London." _Oops. Puu wouldn't be happy if she knew Usagi was saying things to random people in the park. She looked at Nabiki who's smile was all flowers and sunshine. Maybe she didn't catch it?

"_London, huh? I wish your Daddy would take me shopping some time. I bet you miss him, don't you?" _

Usagi immediately nodded. At least he was alive. She lost her smile.

"_I'm sorry, Sweetie. I didn't mean to make you sad."_

"_Stupid Dark Lords. Why do they always come after __**my **__Daddy? They should try to kill someone else for a change." _Usagi didn't mean to be heard but there was something in her eye and it was very distracting.

Nabiki handed her a handkerchief.

_"I haven't talked to my Daddy or given him a good hug in a long time. I think today I will." _The lady's eyes were sparkling just a bit now as she stood back up. _"I tend to come by this park a lot, Sweetie. If you want someone to talk to, just come up to me and say hi."_

"_Okay. Oh, I'm sorry about being grumpy at first. Boys wouldn't leave me alone earlier."_

"_Think nothing of it, Miss." _Nabiki saw that Usagi was cleaning up and helped her fold the blanket.

_"Call me Cuteness. That's the name Daddy picked for me - my middle name." _Usagi Cuteness smiled as she tucked the blanket into a cloth shoulder bag that Daddy had sent with the robes. Space expansion charms were so cool! It took a bit of time, but she managed to put a soup bowl, the rest of the peach cobbler and her blanket back inside. Maybe she should have offered Nabiki a slice? Next time she would.

Miss Tendo waved to the little witch in her Victorian baby blue robes. Cuteness waved back once, jumped on her broom and took off into the sky. For the next nine minutes, Nabiki listened to the police scanner radio she had with her until the little witch was lost between two city blocks around the Azabu-Juban subway station. Her cameraman stepped out of the bushes.

"When's Kiki starting her delivery service, Miss Tendo?" He set his gear down and waited with her for the van to pull around.

"_We'll give the office some flying shots and a picture or two without me. Don't leak any of the interview yet. I want to see if she'll come back." _Nabiki saw pain in the little witch's face when she mentioned 'Dark Lords'. On the minus side, Nabiki would be in hot water with that green haired Senshi if she published everything the little witch told her. On the plus side, this girl might just narrate the story that makes Nabiki world famous.

**End Chapter**

REV 09/2012


	17. Once More Into the Breach

**Chapter Seventeen: Once More Into the Breach**

August 25rd, 1996

White. Everything was white.

"Albus? Albus, can you hear me?" That was Poppy. What was she doing at Diagon Alley?

"...hmmmmmnn..."

It would appear that there was something wrong with his face. Or was that his brain? Albus just realized that he hadn't tried to say anything in particular. Perhaps he should.

"Poppy, dear. What are you doing in Diagon Alley? There are dangerous people about who wouldn't hesitate to strike at such a well known healer."

"He thinks we're still there. Sweet Morgana, what did that girl do to him?" That was Minerva. Did she really go with him? Why couldn't he remember? It seems like such a simple thing to know...

"It's too early to say until I ask Albus a few questions, but physically he's fine." Then why did he feel so odd? "Better than fine, really. The Headmaster hasn't been this healthy since the first physical I ever gave him, and he may have done better this time than on that one."

"Perhaps, dear Poppy, if you could just tell me what has happened since Miss Serenity's last spell, then we could learn how that came to be." The Headmaster opened his eyes. He really should have known that Poppy wouldn't have gone to the alley, but how did he get back to Hogwarts? "I remember the Senshi... yes, that's the proper term... the Senshi casting something without incantation. Then, everything was white. How curious. I don't even remember how long it took for the white to go away."

Albus looked over to the Deputy Headmistress. "Did you go with us? I don't remember taking you to the Alley with me."

"I most certainly did go. You must be experiencing memory loss to some degree." Minerva turned to the school Healer. "Perhaps you should examine everyone who was there, Poppy. I must admit to feeling much better now than yesterday morning. Whatever spell the girl did use, I'm sure it affected just about everyone."

"Are either of you feeling any pain? Soreness? Anything at all?" Both answered in the negative.

"Well, the memory loss is still bothersome." Poppy tutted. "I'm afraid I can't let you go just yet. No more chasing after teenage girls for at least a day or two, Albus."

Minerva _almost_ giggled. Albus got his twinkle back.

"Poppy my dear. I stopped chasing young girls before muggles learned how to fly." Minerva let out a snort. Did she like the joke or did she not understand that muggles knew how to fly? "It was only after my desire to chase grown women left me altogether did the young witches of England begin flocking to my banner."

As odd as he felt, he wasn't out of it enough to mention any attraction to the male of the species. Poppy could handle the information but Minerva may fall dead on the spot were that to ever come to light.

Albus looked past the healer and Deputy Headmistress to see Severus Snape two beds down.

"And what of Severus's condition?"

"He appears to be resting peacefully. I haven't a clue as to when he'll come around. There were also several Death Eaters taken captive who all went to Ministry holding cells. They appeared to be healed just like you and everyone else." The Poppy allowed a little bit of gossip out hoping to rope the Headmaster into talking about this Moon Princess girl's abilities. "That awful mark on his arm is gone."

Albus raised his eyebrows at that.

"The others, how many people did that spell affect?" Minerva set a copy of this morning's Daily Prophet into the Headmaster's lap.

"The articles seem to exaggerate the totals a bit but I believe about forty badly injured or dying individuals were healed completely. Everyone who went to Saint Mungo's has been released already."

Albus contemplated her report as he skimmed the front cover of the paper.

"I do believe that the Crown Princess was understating her abilities when she told me that healing and purification magic were family specialties. I did back her into something of a corner, didn't I?"

Albus read a line or two of text which pointed out that the Death Eaters had already cast the Dark Mark above the alley and portkeyed out in high spirits before the wall of healing magic swept through and reversed much of the damage done. There were still deaths, but not nearly as many as there could have been.

"Well played, young lady. I daresay that whenever I feel under the weather, I shall endeavor to be 'attacked' by her again."

Albus spent the rest of the morning reading the Prophet and getting reports from Order members. Dozens of witnesses saw the Princess enter Fred and George's shop after the injured were made whole again. Several who were witnesses to both Diagon events noticed the recurrence of overpowering white light and credited her for saving Diagon Alley a second time. Luckily, the confrontation between Headmaster and Senshi Princess went unreported.

As lunchtime rolled around, Albus almost left the infirmary to retrieve some of his ever-present lemon drops, except... he didn't feel the need like he usually would have. Perhaps he could do without them today. When did he start tweaking the recipe again? It was about the time he first became Headmaster if he remembered correctly. Taking medication for his aches and pains in candy form just seemed like such a good idea at the time. Was it really so long ago? Albus made a note to re-analyze his lemon drops to see what they'd do to him now that his health has been improved.

* * *

Andrews gained consciousness for what he now hoped to be the very last time. His Lord had not been pleased upon hearing the news following the 'successful' assault on Diagon Alley.

'Useless', the Dark Lord called him. Andrews thought back to the action. They had done well up to the portkey out, he was sure of it. He and Bellatrix had both come back blood soaked and flush with victory. They delivered the after action report together and then went their separate ways to celebrate.

All too soon he was requested in the throne room. He thought this summons was for reassignment or perhaps even for a reward of some sort. He was being reassigned as it happens, just not where and how he expected. After fresh news came in from Diagon Alley, news Andrews hadn't even heard yet, he had been reassigned as the new target. Bellatrix too.

Seeing that Andrews was awake once more, a random Death Eater handed him a vial. In it was a potion he didn't recognize right off. Well, it's not like they'd give him a choice about it.

Swallowing the potion as quickly as he could, Andrews was surprised that the taste was a bit bitter but otherwise quite good. Then he saw his hand change shape. What the hell just happened?

"Take the new Lady Malfoy to Cell Three. There are a few blokes waiting who'd like to get to know her better." That came from the other side of an open door.

Oh. Oh hell. Her skin lost all color and she began to shake. The guard who was in charge of Andrews was none to gentle as he needed to get 'her' there quickly. Polyjuice had a time limit if you only used one dose after all.

* * *

Dear Minako,

Well, you asked for something to remember me by, and I've got just the thing. When I asked my French associate to purchase magical jewelry, I really had no idea how inventive some of these things would be.

I'm guessing that you have already opened the box by now, so I'll just explain it then. You're now the proud owner of a charm bracelet for the Callipygian Venus. That translates to Venus of the Beautiful Buttocks. See? I was thinking of you when I picked it out.

Yes, it is enchanted. If you put it on, anyone who focuses on you and sees it will be struck dumb with the need to stare at your arse. I suppose that it's meant to work on the 'make love not war' principle.

Be careful, the description I got never said if it also works on girls or just us blokes.

XOXO

Harry

A spell cast at the parchment caused the ink to dry immediately. Two quick folds later and Harry's finished with his letter. A red wax seal and Minako's name in his best calligraphy were the finishing touches.

"Dobby?"

pop

"Yes Mister Lord Harry Potter Sir?" Will wonders never cease? Dobby was wearing a clean uniform this time. Was that a crest on his jacket pocket?

"Do you know Minako Aino? One of the girls who visited from Japan?" Harry didn't think Dobby had met the girls but then Dobby had found Harry without really knowing where to look for him that summer before Second Year.

"Was she one of the girls who felt like stars, Mister Lord Harry Potter Sir?" Well, it was an odd way of putting it, but...

"Yes. As a matter of fact, she was. Minako would feel like Venus."

"Oh! I can find a girl in Japan that feels like Venus, Harry Potter Sir! I can!" Brilliant.

"Make sure to ask if she's Minako before dropping this off, not that there should be two girls that feel like the planet Venus- oh, and wait for her to be alone too!"

Harry handed over his letter and a small box wrapped in red paper on which two gold dragons kept chasing each other around the corners.

"Yes, Sir! Mister Harry Potter Sir!"

pop

Just as Dobby left the room, a pendant was dangled in front of Harry's face.

"She brought more of the mind shield necklaces." Hermione must have snuck up behind him as he was finishing his letter. "There's loads of interesting charms and whatnot in those boxes. Really, Fleur did an outstanding job for you. Not that shopping is very demanding... and it wasn't her money she was spending... did she say how many galleons she spent anyway? A lot of these are set in gold. More than one have rare jewels set in them."

"Don't know, don't care." Harry reached out and grabbed Hermione's hand within his own. "If these things save lives in the coming days and years, then they'll be worth every knut I payed for them. However much that happened to be."

"Which... which one did you send _her_?" Hermione had remembered then. Was that jealousy? Harry should have known that Ron didn't have a monopoly on the stuff.

"Callipygian Venus charm bracelet. She's Sailor Venus after all." Hermione went red when she remembered the explanation for that one. She also remembered setting one of those aside for herself as soon as she heard what they did.

After yesterday's adventure, none of the teens really felt like leaving Grimmauld Place today. Instead, the three living teens played magical tag using the various enchanted jewelry pieces in turn as a test to see how they worked. It wasn't all work, hexing a friend in the back could be remarkably therapeutic at times. Both Ginny and Hermione loved using Callipygian Venus bracelets on Harry because it was so fun to watch him stare at their bums in a daze as they cast prank after prank on him.

Usagi would get them back. Nobody screwed with her man like that and got away with it.

* * *

August 26th, 1996

Harry stared at the banquet on display for this morning's breakfast. Dobby and Kreacher had really outdone themselves this time.

Hermione and Ginny were cuddling up to each other on the kitchen table. To be fair, it was a bit chilly in the kitchen and the girls needed all of the body heat they could get. When they both woke up, they'd realize they were starkers.

"_I made breakfast today, Harry. What do you think?" _Usagi was hovering by his side admiring her Nefarious Plans™ as they reached fruition.

"_You really know how to present __m__akizushi don't you. And the ingredients are quite fresh. Is this for a special occasion?"_

He hadn't missed her birthday or anything, had he? Noooo... Usagi's birthday is June 30th. Cuteness made absolutely sure Harry would remember that.

_"They weren't too apologetic for your treatment in the games last night. Those Pretty-Butt charms really got you good."_ Usagi didn't mind Harry checking out other girls. She just didn't like seeing Harry get taken advantage of.

_"I'm still a bit surprised at that, though I suppose I shouldn't be. I have a resistance to mind magics like Imperio and the Veela Thrall, but this 'Pretty-Butt' charm is a diffe__r__ent kind of magic."_

Harry and Usagi continued their discussion on behavioral magics as Harry sat down in front of a plate of sausage and eggs. Both boy and ghost admired their view until the living banquet began to stir.

"Ginny. What are you doing in my bed?" Hermione hadn't opened her eyes yet.

"Your bed? What are we both doing on the kitchen table?" Ginny must have wondered at the hardness of their shared 'bed' first.

"Girls? Is one you having fresh milk for Harry breakfast? Harry very much like milk."

A panicked struggle to get up began. Hermione and Ginny both un-knowingly sacrificed decency for speed in their haste to get off of the table and retreat upstairs.

Wow, Harry had never seen blushes develop so completely. Not that there was any doubt but when Ginny threw her legs over the side of the table one at a time she proved herself a natural redhead. Seems Hermione favored the clean shaven look, herself.

As Hermione moved to escape the kitchen, Harry called out, "Tell me when you and Ginny are done getting cleaned up this morning, please. I think it's time to bring the Goblins in for some warding work on the house."

Hermione grunted as she scampered off.

"Thank you, 'Mione." As Hermione fled after Ginny, Harry made his way to the front door.

One hour later, Harry and Kreacher met Goblin representatives in the Front Foyer. The warding went off without incident, thank Merlin. As the new Fidelius was cast that afternoon, Harry was named the new secret keeper:

'Harry Potter saw two naked witches on the kitchen table at 12 Grimmauld Place, London'

The girls were less than happy to learn that they featured prominently in the new secret. Harry on the other hand was quite happy that the secret no longer mentioned the Order of the Phoenix nor did it claim to be his own home's location. Who's to say that it would always be his home, anyway? After the boils went away and the bat bogeys stopped swarming him, he'd start letters to Bill and Fleur pointing out that the secret changed. They'll have to get together again to re-learn it.

Perhaps the girls would feel better after some exploring. There were still two Black... that is to say Potter family properties that he hasn't seen yet.

* * *

August 27th, 1996

Harry stumbled through a massive stone fireplace. Maybe one day, he'd ask someone the right way to do it. As he gained his bearings, the fire faded out and the room once again went dark.

"Lumos."

Light burst forth from the tip of Harry's newer wand. He held the Scepter in his left hand just in case... well... just in case.

"_Where's the light switch?" _The room brightened up a little with Usagi's arrival.

"_Magical homes don't have light switches, Love. We have lamps and torches and windows. Mag__i__cal ones of course."_ Harry looked around a room that seemed about as dirty as Grimmauld Place was the first time he'd visited there.

"Dobby?"

pop

"Lord Harry Potter calls for Dobby?" The elf was wearing a uniform just like last time. This time, he had a kilt on instead of pants. Was Dobby developing a fashion sense?

"Light up the place will you?"

"Yes Sir, Mister Lord Potter Sir." With a snap, eight oil lamps appeared to light at the same time on wall sconces around the dusty entry hall.

"Could you go around opening windows and lighting lights for us? We're going to want to have a look around." The stylish elf nodded and set off to work.

"Usagi?" Harry looked over to the ghost as he walked further into the hall. "I'll need to get the girls one at a time as soon as I find the visitor portkeys."

As Harry brought out the parchment describing this particular manor house, curtains were drawn on a long series of windows which appeared to frame an overgrown garden, complete with a dry three tiered fountain. Once upon a time, this manor must have really been a nice place for parties. With a little bit of- okay, with a great deal of hard work, it could be a good home in the future. Harry canceled his lumos when the clerestory windows above opened enough to allow direct morning sunlight to enter the room and reveal its dusty extents.

"Ahhh..." Now that Harry was inside the home, several protections on the parchment released and a few new paragraphs appeared.

"_Usagi, I'm going to open a drawer in this desk over here. If something odd happens, can you get Do__b__by?"_

The ghost of Sailor Moon looked at the teenaged wizard father of her daughter who was visiting from the future.

"_Define odd."_

Harry almost said something snarky but thought better of it and moved on to defining odd.

"_If I begin screaming o__r__ acting funny... or if something jumps out and attacks."_

"_I'll get help if you're in trouble, but I still don't see how that would be odd." _Usagi giggled as she floats a little further away.

Ten seconds later, Dobby zipped past them followed closely by a swarm of angry pixies. Harry and Usagi both stared at where the little elf was for a moment before a loud crash filled the shadowy halls.

"_Right, I better do this before I have to clarify your instructions yet again."_

Harry reached out to the third drawer down on the right side of a rather large desk. With the Scepter of Prissiness stuck through his belt and his new wand pointing at the drawer, he opened it.

No monsters, no ghosts (well, no more than there were already) and no curses. Idiot! Maybe he should have looked for those first? Harry cursed his stupidity and cast detection charms on the items sitting at the bottom of the drawer. Good, they all glowed the right color.

* * *

"But look at what she did to the Headmaster!" Molly was going to show that saucy little tart a thing or two if ever the two should meet.

"She's as pure light as they come, Mum. Dumbledore was in the wrong!" Bill had had just about enough of this shite. If it wasn't some little cut about the French or some little thing about how nice and pretty Tonks was then it was some big thing about Asian whores and their dark revolutionary ways.

"I'll not have you disrespect Albus Dumbledore in my home! He is the leader of the light! He will bring down He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named AND he will reign in this younger generation's rebellious ways!"

Molly's face was a close match to her daughter's back in the Tower of London. And when Usagi told Gin that she and Harry were exclusive... and when Harry was being all friendly with that green haired Jap whore... and when Harry got a kiss from Phlegm Delacunt and well you get the picture.

Mollywobbles wasn't about to let her little babies out into the world where they may find the least little bit of peril. No. Harry 'the seventh Weasely boy' Potter was going to stay home with his Mum and he'd marry the most perfect little princess in the Magical World. That would be her daughter, Ginevra in case anyone was wondering. Now her little Harry's been showing a bit of sass of late and it's time his Mum put a stop to it.

"Albus Dumbledore can no longer claim zat title! Did you even listen to what 'e and 'is potions master were going to do to ze poor boy?" Fleur couldn't take any more of this. She only enjoyed being silent for her man when a gag was in her mouth, and even then she preferred to moan around it.

"Lies! And I think I've had enough of your corruptive influence in my house. Miss Delacour? Leave. Now."

"Very well. There is a wedding to plan and things will be so much easier at the Delacour estate than they would be in your back yard. Apolline will be inviting wizards and witches from Caen to Toulon when she hears the news."

Molly sensed several things wrong with that sentence. First, there was no horrid French accent. Second, the speaker still assumed that her sweet wonderful son would defy her and marry the French slut after she was cast out of the Burrow. Third, the speaker had her son William's voice. And his face. And his body.

"My back yard? But it's your back yard too, William." She was about to get rid of the filth at wandpoint when her son put his hand on her arm.

"Was. Was my back yard years ago Mother." He turned to his fiancée. "Allons-y."

Molly was struck dumb by the very idea that her William would go so far as to speak French in his own home.

As the Weasley Matriarch watched her firstborn son turn his back on her, she felt a comforting hand begin to rub circles into her back.

"What did I do wrong?"

Molly didn't understand. Where was her happy ending? She _had_ to have one this time. She couldn't live through another Death Eater war if her own sons fought and died as their uncles had before them.

"You forgot that children don't stay children forever, Molly. I was behind you all the way when our house was full of little terrors each breaking the rules and just waiting to have a wand of their very own. I was behind you when the twins turned out to have inherited that need for chaos your brothers had. I was also behind you when a sad little boy with green eyes looked at us like a beacon in the darkness."

She turned around at his subtle nudge and he pulled his beloved wife in close as she began to weep.

"We may have a couple who aren't of age yet, but they're all grown up. Even Ginevra is more than just that little pixie who hid in the cupboard whenever Harry walked by."

Arthur couldn't tell if her snort was from laughter or from crying.

"Face it love, we've become your parents. Ginny's already fought Death Eaters for Merlin's sake. That's something neither of us can claim to have attempted until after N.E.W.T.'s at the very least. She's made it through. So did Ron and Harry and Hermione too."

Arthur took his wife to bed and gave her a dreamless sleep potion before heading back to the Ministry and the chaos of a war torn society.

* * *

This summer just kept getting better and better.

Harry Potter was staring down from the highest window of his new- er old manor house near Brunton, Northumberland in open lust for what the Royal Air Force had built there in 1942. The Black family had already consolidated in London long before and so didn't put up much of a fight when muggles swarmed the property with wartime urgency.

Harry had his very own World War II era airbase.(1) God be praised. Whether the R.A.F. had found it unnecessary after V-E Day or the muggle repelling charms were somehow renewed in 1945, the field was mostly abandoned.

Ginny and Hermione had to pull him back out of the window frame before he could make a jump with his Firebolt and take off for the old runways. The puppy dog eyes he hit them with at that point were the most powerful he had ever generated. It was only by shear will and a subtle prodding from Usagi that they were able to refuse his adorableness. There was plenty of manor house to explore yet _and_ there was a second location to go explore in the afternoon. Alas, if he had just offered the British witches sex instead, they may have relented.

…

"Usagi? How did Cuteness get here?" Harry didn't notice that Usagi hadn't heard him. The girls were all two rooms away searching through the old Black family records trying to determine how Steep Holm, an island in the Bristol Channel, came to be a part of the old Black family legacy.

Not that Harry cared. No. Cuteness was glaring at him with hate in her eyes. He couldn't take that look from his Princess.

"You really believe you're good enough to be my father? You think you can show me real love? Don't make me laugh."

Cuteness looked older than Tonks, but it was still her standing before him. It _was_ her, but different. Cuteness's hair was still pink and her eyes were still red but her crescent moon sigil was down-turned and black.

"I don't know what you're on about Cuteness but you can stop it right now." Harry had to make her see that he loved her. She had to know.

"You don't love me. You'll never know what it means to have a loving family. I'll never know love – not after you abandon mother and she kills herself in shame."

Her cruel smirk was crushing his spirit faster than any dementor or torture curse ever could. Harry was already so far gone that he didn't even hear the footsteps coming up from behind. Cuteness raised her wrists into view to show two fresh cuts bleeding freely.

"This is what it means to be born a Potter!" The dark Future Cuteness spat.

"You're wrong! I love your mother so much it hurts. I love you more than life itself. I'm going to bring her back to life and we're going to be your parents and you're going to be the happiest time traveling little girl on this planet or any other! I swear it!" Harry was on his knees crying before the dark angel, almost praying for death, when help finally came.

"Riddikulus!"

Suddenly, the evil Cuteness was wearing the kind of fluffy girl's dress that you would normally see on a three-year-old's doll. Ginny and Hermione quickly corralled the bogart into a closet and locked the door.

For the next five minutes, the two witches looked on as Usagi slowly coaxed Harry back to the land of the living with soft whispers and coos. Merlin, it all made sense in a fucked up sort of way.

Hermione had been happy to see Harry play with Cuteness when she visited London. He was so happy that Hermione could forget her own hormones and just watch the two of them play and laugh and cuddle. It was after the girl left that Hermione began losing sleep to the puzzle of little Princess Cuteness.

This changed everything. Oh, maybe someone else might cry foul at the time travel reference. Not Hermione and certainly not after Third Year. And his worst fear? Knowing what Hermione knew about Harry's past, she could easily see how this would beat out a dementor. For Harry Potter, Crucio would seem a warm kiss compared to that special kind of hell where his own daughter grows up unloved and suicidal.

Hermione thought of just how much Cuteness looked like her mother. Sod it all. She's got no chance then unless it's as a mistress. Hermione didn't want to go that route and she knew Harry was too noble to cheat on a girl. The prat.

Ginny was absolutely gobsmacked. So... not only did he kill a giant snake when he was twelve, but he got a nine year old Asian girl preggers when he was eight? Wait, there was something about time travel in there somewhere. What the bloody hell was going on?

Finally, Harry stood up and looked through a window in the old manor they had come to explore. Before either witch could ask him to answer a question or two, he spoke up.

"'Mione, Gin. I need to go check something. Please stay here for a minute."

With a quick wordless spell-chain, Harry went girl for the first time that day. Then she concentrated. If it was about three in the afternoon where she was… better aim for the hallway.

"But where are you go-"

CRACK

Hermione didn't get to finish her sentence before Harry's apparition crack tore through the old home. A moment later, Usagi followed him out.

* * *

CRACK

Harry braced herself against the soft painted walls of the Outer Senshi's upper hallway. After standing in darkness for a moment, light escaped the bottom of a door a little down the hall.

Shortly after that, two young women in silk teddies poked their heads out of to see what the noise was. Michiru and Haruka were both a little surprised to see their Princess leaning back against a wall and rubbing tears out of her eyes. What they couldn't see was the silent specter floating next to her.

"_Usagi?"_

"_No, Harry."_ She looked up. _"I'm sorry I woke you up, but I just had to see her."_

"_You didn't wake- what I mean to say is, are you alright?"_ The two lovers could set their libidos aside long enough to provide comfort if needed.

_"I'll be fine in a minute. I just… need to see her. Sorry."_

Harry stepped up to Cutenesses bedroom door and slowly twisted the knob. The door squeaked once before turning freely on its hinges. She took two steps into the dark room and waited for her eyes to adjust. Having a ghost nearby sped things up a little.

First, Harry spotted a foot. Then a little hand hung over the side of the bed. Cuteness's window didn't let much light into her room at this time of night but there was enough to see her spread out over her bed with the covers kicked off.

She looked so perfect sleeping there, all innocent and short and stuff. Not like that _other_ Cuteness. _That_ one would be haunting Harry's nightmares for weeks to come.

Harry took a moment to kiss her snoring daughter before heading downstairs to apparate back.

* * *

August 28th, 1996

"Harry, my boy! I was beginning to think you'd forgotten me!" The Minister of Magic, Rufus Scrimgeour, got out of his seat and shook Harry's hand.

"I'm sorry sir, but my life has been a bit hectic these past few days and I've only now gotten 'round to dealing with that Wizengamot meeting. As you may have seen in the Prophet, my Intended and our friends have been having a rough time of it in public even without me around to liven things up." Harry took a seat in front of the Minister's desk.

"Think nothing of it, lad. You saved me from a rather dull meeting with some positively ancient accountants." Rufus shuddered a bit. He pretended to look for eavesdroppers and said the next line a little quieter. "This is one of those things that I've come to accept that the muggles are much better at. Those calculators and computers and the like, they beat quill and abacus every time."

"Finally, a wizard who actually admits that the muggles can do something right! If only you'd say that in print, Sir."

Harry was truly surprised. He didn't think he'd ever find a pureblood who could say computer much less know what one does.

"Oh, I can't do that, Harry. And I'd rather you keep this conversation to yourself, every last word, eh?" Harry nodded. "Good. Good. Well, you must know that dark wizardry aside, the pureblood elites are very entrenched in the Ministry. Name one half-blood or muggleborn Department Head... you can't!"

Rufus took a moment to pour cups of tea for himself and his guest before sitting down.

"I'm not saying this is the way things should be, mind you. It's just the way things are. The Old Families have most of the gold and the businesses... and you mustn't forget the power of tradition."

"It's the same in the muggle world, really." Harry had heard this in one form or another in his history classes and just watching what bits of the BBC he could manage in between chores. "The golden rule: He who has the gold makes the rules."

"Good, Harry. Very good." And Rufus was impressed. As light a wizard as Mister Potter was, he still clearly knew something about how the world worked. "You're not likely to find many of those rich purebloods with anything good to say about muggles, even the light ones."

Harry snorted. The minister smelled a story.

"Got an example you'd like to share, Harry?" Harry set his tea down. Still a little hot, but it did pass the ring test so Harry put a check mark on his mental tally for the minister.

"Well... as much as I love the Weasely's, every time I think of the collection of plugs in Arthur's shed I want to laugh. I don't think he knows what they're really for." Harry couldn't hide his grin.

"Quite. If that bitch Rita Skeeter really wanted to do me in, she wouldn't look for mistresses or fraud. No, she'd be following me to my choice of bookstores. The ones on the other side of the Rusty Cauldron, I mean."

The Minister finished took a sip and relaxed for a moment before continuing.

"But I degress. You see Harry, I'm trying to tell you what I'm up against in this war with the Dark Lord and his Death Eaters."

Harry perked up some.

"He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is no fool. I could see this clear enough the first time around as an Auror. He didn't recruit just anyone you know. Malfoy... McNair... Knott... some may be thugs but they all come from influential and rich families. Not just anyone can kill off a whole neighborhood and bribe their way out of prison like Lucius did."

"Don't like the Malfoys then, Minister?" Harry had once thought of starting an anti-Malfoy club in third year, but got distracted by the whole 'time-traveling battle with dementors' thing.

"Wouldn't mind a bit of wand polishing with Narcissa but things would be so much easier on our side if Lucius and his little clone would find some other Ministry to terrorize."

While fighting down his blush, Harry had to admit to himself that he'd had the same thought about Draco's mother more than once. Damned teenaged hormones.

"One down, one to go." Oops. Harry hadn't meant to say that out loud.

"Care to elaborate on that one Harry? I'll swear not to prosecute if you can tell me that an arrogant killer and rapist is out of my hair for good." Saying he'll swear to it and swearing to it is two different things of course. It never hurt to have options.

Harry mentally cursed his stumble but knew he wasn't in any real danger after the Minister's stance in the Wizengamot floor. "Malfoy Senior and a few of his masked friends followed me to China. I hope one day to see the look on Draco's face when he learns that a tribe of muggle warriors who still follow the old ways killed his father and the others without losing even one of their own."

"You saw this?"

"I wasn't around for the end, but Elder Cologne now has three pretty white masks and a silver one to mount over her fireplace."

"Good to know. Just the same, I won't be trying to console that widow anytime soon, much as I'd like to. Back to today's lesson. Even without Lucius, the other side is like a powerful and exclusive club. If they'd only stop killing people the political clout and money would be enough to control the whole Ministry. They have entirely too much control as it is. It's gotten so that I can't do much of anything on my own, Harry. I need help." Rufus poured himself a second cup as Harry finally got a sip out of his first.

"Is that why I'm here then? You'd like some 'help'?" Now they were really getting somewhere.

"We can help each other, Harry. The Dark Lord wants both of us dead. He wants a puppet Ministry that will let him and his servants to rule over all of humanity. Unfortunately, he's got the support of several pureblood lines because of old blood prejudices. And the worst part: Dumbledore's no help to either of us. We need to stick together, Harry."

"I can see your point well enough. Strength in numbers and all that. What is it you want from me?" Harry looked over the minister's shoulder at a portrait of two wizards dueling. Hopefully if the Minister reached too far he wouldn't flinch visibly.

"Not much to begin with. An interview in the Prophet with a reporter I approve of. Maybe an interview or speech on the Wizarding Wireless Network. I need to drum up support for our side. To be honest, you're Princess has been doing a remarkable job of that unasked for but we can't have the public thinking that she is going to do all the hard work for us. I don't know what her plans are when you head back to school but I'm sure they don't involve saving the world."

As a matter of fact...

"Yes, her luck with public ambush has really put a crimp in our day to day goings on as you can imagine. As much as she hates to see dark forces moving freely about like this, it's not her war. It's ours."

So the boy claims some responsibility there. Good. "The much vaunted prophecy, I assume?"

"I'm not about to repeat the whole thing, vague as it is. But, yeah. The short answer is that this whole 'Chosen One' thing's not so far off the mark. And here I am, just having finished my O.W.L.'s." Harry and Rufus pondered the absurdity of the situation as they each took a sip.

"This 'power he knows not'. Figured it out yet? The public knows about that part too." Harry knew better than to speak openly on this subject.

"That's the problem with prophecies, they're so vague. It could be that one day Voldemort is going finally get back inside Hogwarts and make a scene during breakfast. I bet ol' Moldishorts has no idea how foul Ron's farts can be. I can see it now: Ron cries out when Voldemort yells 'BOO!' behind him and blasts out a cloud so foul that Voldie keels over and dies on the spot. I've wanted to die once or twice, let me tell you." You've gotta love dark humor and it got Rufus to smile.

"Fair enough Harry. I can wait for your victory speech to hear the details, provided I'm still around to hear it." He set his tea cup down and looked closely at Harry. In any other situation, Rufus would have just sent the boy home. He was too young for this; the line between childhood and adulthood was set where it was for good reason.

"So, can I count on you?"

"I won't just say just anything you put in front of me. I've got my ideas on what the public needs to hear as well." It was time to see how hard the Minister of Magic was going to push.

"We need to be on the same page, my boy. Now, you did do pretty well in the Wizengamot so I'll give you a chance. We'll agree on articles and interviews ahead of time. I'll get you a copy of what I'd like you to say and give you the chance to send me your ideas back. That's got to happen before the interviews, of course." Rufus shifted a little in his seat. "Anything that can hurt the Dark Lord's image will be like gold in our coffers."

"What if we use his real name?" Why didn't anyone call him Riddle anyway? Harry's known that since he was twelve. "The muggles chase down terrorists by making them sound like ordinary people. Flawed. Sure, they'll give the guy a title, but the world learns how often he used to wet the bed a day later.

"You know his real name?" Rufus had never heard anyone mention the Voldemort's real name back in the first war.

"Tom Marvolo Riddle. I learned that in during the Chamber of Secrets thing in Second Year. Speaking of, I wonder if that bloody great snake is still down there." Rufus stared at the boy as he went off on a tangent. "Say, Minister. Why can't you just check people for the Dark Mark on their arms anyway?"

Where the hell did that come from?

"We're back to the elite club and the Golden Rule again Harry. It's illegal to check for the Dark Mark. Those that are caught in the middle of a crime bearing the mark can still bribe their way out or have their friends get them out anyway." Rufus was just about done. He'd gotten the boy to agree to Prophet articles and Wireless interviews. Now he needed Harry to commit to a public meeting or two.

"Speaking of being caught in the middle, several of my friends were at Diagon Alley with Usagi when the Death Eaters popped in. Trapped as they were, they had to defend themselves. Are they going to have to stand before the Wizengamot like I did after Fourth Year? I remember Fudge changing the meeting details on me at the last minute."

Harry was beginning to check the clock at the edge of his vision. He was a bit peckish. Esurient. Perhaps he could get a hold of some Tilsit or Norweigan Jarlsberger at the Nation Cheese Emporium just down the way.

"Well, Harry. I don't know the details, but I'm sure I can take care of that for you. You can't blame a kid for defending himself. Perhaps you can do something for me in exchange?"

"What did you have in mind?" Harry braced for the worst.

"War or not, I intend to have the Ministry Yule Ball this year. I'd like to be able to tell people you're going. Can I count on you to be at the ball, Harry?"

He should have expected this. On the minus side, it would practically guarantee that Death Eaters crash the party. On the plus side, it would practically guarantee that Death Eaters crash the party.

"Is this a public relations thing or baiting a trap? I would think that if the Death Eaters know I'm going ahead of time, they may plan to show up wands out and hexes flying."

Harry put down his teacup. Any more and he'd have to go to the loo.

"I plan on tightening security as much as I can. Still, let's plan for the worst and hope for the best, eh?"

Harry wondered how much time he'd be spending in England during the upcoming Yule break. Japan and England were not a simple apparition away from each other. Except… maybe they were? Harry would have to see just how far he could go without a massive emotional charge one of these days.

* * *

August 29th, 1996

Albus gazed out the window of his office, high above the battlements of Hogwarts Castle.

The view looked different now than it had in decades past but as to exactly how he couldn't tell you. He thought what he had seen was normal and natural but clearly that was not the case. Perhaps lemon drops should carry health advisories?

At least, his lemon drops should. When Albus showed Madam Pomfrey the potion cocktail he'd 'discovered in a previous Headmaster's journal', she asked how long it took the other Headmaster to die after the entry. She didn't believe him when he said it took more than fifty years. There was, by her estimation, enough hemlock to bring Hagrid down inside of a week.

Perhaps he shouldn't say anything about the phoenix tear cocktails or the really powerful lemon drops hidden in his desk. He may want to dispose of the recipes as well.

* * *

"You'd best wake up soon. Hogwarts opens in a couple of days, you know." She said.

He knew. "Perhaps it would be best were I never to wake again. Your son wouldn't complain."

Severus began pushing the swing again. Here, in Severus Snape's mind, he could be a ten year old boy pushing a ten year old Lily Evans on a park swing for as long as he wanted. Why hadn't he ever figured this bit out before? He had the occlumency skills for it... maybe being a rotten bastard had more of a negative impact on his life than he thought it did.

Maybe it was the guilt. He'd always hated Harry for his messy Potter hair and his distinct Potter face. All those years of taunts never hurt James, did they? James wasn't there. Snape also saw the green eyes. Somehow, it felt like every taunt and jab at James by way of Harry missed its target. Instead, Severus felt like he had been hurting Lily. The Potions Master took over two hundred points from the boy for the sin of breathing in five years. Three detentions as well. He had thirteen different point reductions that he would use at least once a month on 'the brat'.

Severus didn't want to pass on if it meant explaining himself to Lily when he reached the other side. Assuming he even went wherever she ended up. Hell would be the easier path.

What could he do if he woke up now? How could he face the students of Hogwarts? What would he tell Albus? How could he possibly continue spying?

Things would have to change.

Severus stopped the swing long enough to give Lily a quick peck on the cheek goodbye before opening his eyes.

* * *

September 1st, 1996

"Ready girls?" Harry got three nods in response. It was time to pass through the barrier.

Ginny and Hermione were both wearing flattering robes which hailed from the Ginny-Heather shopping extravaganza. Harry had on his Sailor Mercury T-shirt, a Teen Witch jacket and had a good mix of discrete defensive jewelry. Usagi was wearing a close copy of the Hogwarts uniform without a cloak. Her ghostly wardrobe changes were getting a lot more complicated recently.

Bedroom fun had a lot to do with that.

Harry had finally called Hedwig back and, after some vicious pecks on the skull had been forgiven for staying away from her for so long. For this leg of the journey Harry's snowy white friend had a firm grip on his shoulder.

"Trunks?" Hermione called out for a last minute check. All three checked their pockets. To hell with dragging the bulky things onto the Hogwarts Express.

With nothing holding them back any longer, they passed through in the agreed upon order: Harry with Usagi, Ginny and then Hermione.

Harry passed through and was met with a wall of redheads and Order of the Phoenix hangers on. That's about what he expected, really.

"Harry!" Molly Weasley had him in the Mollywobble Death Grip half a second before Ginny could pull him out of the way.

"Where have you been!?" She pulled back just enough to check his overall health before diving in for a second M.D.G. attack.

"_We've_ been busy, Mum. Loads to do and see when you bum a room off this bloke."

Ginny was being selfless and selfish at the same time. Selfless as a sacrificial lamb to get Harry free to move about. Selfish because she was Mummy's Princess and she deserved to get more attention from Mummy than anyone else.

She still had it. Half a second later, Molly was crushing her little baby and Harry could suddenly breathe again.

"Yes, you don't do things in half measures, do you Harry?" Hermione came up from behind and picked some Burrow lint off of Harry's jacket.

"Your Worshipfulness!" Fred and George were waiting for Harry with package in hand.

"Thanks to your visit last Saturday"

"we had an idea to top all the other"

"pranks we've ever done before!"

"It's almost enough to make"

"us want to go back to school just to see it play out."

"And all you have to do is follow instructions on the train, partner."

"Nudge, nudge,"

"Wink, Wink,"

"Say no more, say no more!"

"Boys! I'll not have any nonsense going on here." Molly was about to Accio the box when Harry snatched it first.

"I'm sorry, Molly, but the twins are counting on me. I can't let fellow Gryffindors down, now can I?" He took the box and re-sized it right there on the platform.

"Harry! What about the Ministry? You'll get an owl for that." Poor Molly, what was with kids these days?

"Relax, I don't believe I'll be getting any such notice." It was a lot harder to catch Harry being naughty these days. She didn't seem to notice that the wand he cast with (gasp) wasn't an Ollivander creation.

Harry's Weasely family reunion was interrupted by an oddly excited werewolf and his metamorphmagus girlfriend.

"Harry. I know she may not want to talk to us right now but I'd really like to apologize to Princess Serenity if she'll let me." What's up with Remus? He looks like he's on a sugar high.

"Remus left the Order, Harry. We both did." Tonks was a little more subdued, but not by much. "That thing with Snape in Hogsmeade, well, we was following orders but that was total shite an' we left."

"You want to apologize to the girl you attacked then?" Harry and Usagi looked at each other.

"Bloody hell, yes!" Harry felt there was more to it than Tonks let on but Usagi nodded her acceptance after a quick back and forth in Japanese.

"'Mione. Cold water, if you please." Harry was through hiding his curse. Not that he expected to keep it quiet much longer even if he tried to.

"Are you sure?" Harry nodded and held out his hand. Encouraged by Harry's wordless spell-chains, Hermione had taken to practicing a few charms wordlessly herself in the past week. Aguamenti was one of them.

When Harry went Heather, the gasp that resulted was rather louder than he had expected at first. A few score random passersby were watching The Harry Potter enter Platform 9 3/4. She sighed. It was like she had cast an area affect Body-Bind curse or something.

She moved a delicate hand into her jacket and pulled out her pair of golden kanzashi. A quick and well practiced move later and her crowd was shocked to see her hair pull itself into a bun and braid combination that everyone had seen on the cover of the Prophet more than once. Two more wand waves and Heather had red eyes and pink hair. With a few final adjustments, Heather Snape was Oakley clad and poking Remus's forehead with the Scepter of Prissiness.

"You had something to say to me, Moony?" He did a minute ago. That was before the Son of Prongs enacted step Forty-seven Q in the 'Mind Fuck Magical England' prank. Tonks recovered first.

"He's trying to both beg forgiveness and thank you for curing his lycanthropy." Wait, what?

"Curing his what?" Harry, along with all of Magical Everything, was quite certain that lycanthropy was supposed to be incurable.

Remus shook himself out of his stupor and hugged the Prongsletess.

"Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you." Remus tried and failed to keep the tears away. "Next time, I swear I'll hold the greasy bastard down for you if you want."

Behind them, the Express whistle went off as a five minute warning.

"Bloody hell. Remus, if you don't stop crying on me then I'll start crying too and what's that going to do to my Bad Girl look if I'm all sniffly." Behind the sunglasses, Harry's eyes were misting up a bit.

Tonks took pity on the Jusenkyo Cursed Magical Girl Wizard by providing Remus with a substitute snuggle-bunny. As Harry began to move once more towards the passenger cars, Tonks made the universal hand signal for 'call me'. Not that there were phones in Hoggy Warty Hogwarts, but there was Owl Post. Seems like the Wizarding World didn't have an equivalent hand signal, no air quilling 'write me' or anything.

"Ron! Girls! Let's do this." Surprisingly, that worked.

As more and more students and parents stared on in shock and confusion, the Moon Princess and her pet ghost boarded the Hogwarts Express. By the time she and her fellow Gryffindors had made it into the nearest car, four different versions of Heather Snape's arrival were filtering about the crowd. Three more rumors involved the Moon Princess without mention of Heather Snape or Harry Potter. All seven were horribly off the mark.

"My but you are a sexy thing aren't you?" Oh, dear God, no. "And I see that worthless sod Potter has left you all alone. Probably off trying to chat up another mudblood or that freak Lovegood."

Draco Malfoy was flirting heavily with Harry. Please Merlin, stop the pain.

"Why don't you ditch those worthless losers behind you and follow me to a private cabin, just the two of us? I promise you a trip to Hogwarts you won't soon forget." Did he really think any of that would work on anyone? How does Pansy shovel her way through this shite every day? Really there was only one thing Harry could do in the face of such a dastardly attempt to steal her energy.

It was silly empowering speech time.

"The Hogwarts Express is a place for children to come and dream of a brighter future. There is no room for your corrupted spirit and your message of darkness and hate. You have insulted me. You have insulted my friends. You are a threat to the future of those I love. In the name of Love and Justice, I will punish you!"

Maybe Harry learned a little too much from Usagi's 'How to be Sailor Moon' lessons. Really.

**Chapter End**

Author's Note:

1. This airbase is real. Check it out on Google Earth. You will see a stand of trees right on the north edge of the field. My explanation is that the muggles couldn't cut those trees down because they were in the muggle repelling ward zone.

**Dirty Omake – The Two Bodied Three-Way**

"Usagi told me you wanted something, Hermione?" After a short search, he found the girl in question pacing back and forth through the (formerly) Black Family Library. She jumped a little at his voice, but seemed to calm down quickly.

"I do at that." She looked over to the double doors behind Harry. Harry wondered why; they both heard Ginny retire for the evening earlier.

"I have something of a proposal for you and Usagi. Um… would you mind shutting the doors? This isn't something I want Ginny getting wind of."

Okay, Harry was officially concerned, but if he couldn't trust Hermione than he couldn't trust anyone.

Harry closed, locked and silenced the doors. He was suddenly nervous being in the same locked room as 'Mione without Usagi floating about. Harry figured that his spectral girlfriend must still be around somewhere as Hermione was still wearing the translation ring and she's always quite prompt in returning it.

"Thanks, Harry." Hermione forced herself to stop pacing by sitting in one of the plushier chairs arranged about the central fireplace. "As you know, Usagi and I have talked about a lot of things. She's really a sweet girl and really fun to be around. Not that she needs my approval to be your girlfriend but I do approve of her one hundred percent."

Harry had to smile at that. It's true that he would have continued with Usagi even if Hermione had put up a fuss, but it would have hurt terribly to do so.

"In these girl to girl chats, the two of us have found a problem or two that we can fix and be done with if you agree to help us out."

"I'd love to help! You are my two favorite girls… that are not my daughter… in the whole world. You must know that I'd do anything the two of you wanted."

Harry watched as Hermione seemed to get both more confident and more nervous at the same time. Funny, he couldn't think of a reason she'd have that reaction.

"I should tell you the problems so that the solution makes more sense to you just the same. First, Usagi learned how long you and I have been hiding our true feelings for each other. She's sure that if it weren't for Ron, the two of us would have been a steady couple long ago and she'd probably still be at the bottom of a spring waiting for some charming prince to come along and fall in."

Oh, dear. Harry knew what this was, now. The last time he saw a proposition essay coming he'd cut if off quickly. Tonight, Harry had already missed his chance for an early escape. All Harry could do now was wait and see how many pluses her 'O' would garner.

"The second problem is that both you and your girlfriend despite finding several creative ways to relieve your sexual tension still haven't been able to have a proper shag. You're not a virgin and neither is she, so Usagi finds it beyond irritating that the two of you have been unable to touch each other properly at least once.

"The third problem is that by demurely stepping aside for his future wife, I end up missing the chance to give myself to the first boy I ever loved. For a girl that puts as much stock in love as Usagi does, this is really tearing at her. Here she is, sharing you with her friends but denying the first girl to love Harry and not the Boy-Who-Lived."

"Let's not forget that you are the first girl that I loved even if I gave you up as Ron's when he claimed you first. I know he didn't treat you the way he should have but I was willing to keep things on a brother-sister level as long as my best mate considered you to be his girl." Harry wanted to get it all out in the open if she was doing the same.

"His girl? I was- never mind that." Hermione couldn't allow anything else to get in the way if she was going to go through with this.

"I'm going to assume that you can back every argument up with three feet of parchment if asked. So I won't bother asking. What you haven't shown me yet is how sleeping with you helps me and Usagi. I also haven't heard her have her say yet. Where is she, anyway?" Hermione smiled. It was time for the 'demonstration'.

Hermione stood up and approached Harry. She seemed to nod once to herself and closed her eyes. Not half a second later, Usagi's golden crescent moon bloomed in the center of Hermione's forehead.

"Hello, Love. I've been hiding here the whole time. Hermione was pretty sure it would work once she heard where I was hanging out Saturday morning." Usagi, wearing Hermione's body, picked up Harry's hand and placed it over 'her' heart.

"Look! I've got a heartbeat." After a few seconds of getting used to being in control, Usagi dropped Harry's hand and put her hands on his shoulders. "It's just like what we did, Harry. Hermione's riding in here with me. I, Usagi, am in control but she gets to hear and see and feel and taste and... well... there was one argument for doing things this way that she wanted me to tell you because she just couldn't."

'Hermione' sat in Harry's lap. Her eyebrows rose upon finding that Harry was definitely affected by tonight's choice of subject matter. She brought her lips down to lightly brush his earlobe, getting a little jump out of both Big Harry and Not So Little Harry. She wiggled her hips a little in appreciation, of course getting another jump from her Chosen One.

"Well, Mister Potter... it seems that Miss Granger is less experienced in the art of lovemaking than we are, not that I claim to be an expert!" Usagi let a very un-Hermione like giggle pass through her lips. "Our very dearest friend Hermione is terribly frightened that she won't score well on her first test... I seem to hear you saying she was like that."

"Quite. Hermione's always the first one to cry over grades despite the fact that she always does so much better than us." Harry was trying very hard to ignore the soft warm body sliding across his lap.

Just give up, boy. Your hormones, heart and mind were all in agreement. The two girls you want most were sharing the exact same space grinding on your hard wand.

"Being the genius that Hermione is, well, she came up with this. We are about to give her the best lesson in making love that she can receive! It'll be like she's doing it but she doesn't have to worry about what happens next and how to and where."

Usagi closed the distance to Harry's ear one more time and whispered, "That's our job."

Before Harry could even register the move, Usagi switched from sitting in his lap to straddling it.

His mind snaped back in focus when a hand grabbed the back of his head and an eager tongue found its way into his mouth.

An hour later, Harry didn't notice the moon sigil flicker and fade on the girl bouncing in his lap.

Hermione's had all of the instruction she needs. It's time she took the exam.

**End Dirty Omake**

REV 09/2012


	18. Epilogue: End of a Dry Spell

**Epilogue: End of a Dry Spell**

Late 30th Century A.D., Mare Serenitatis

...slightly later than last time...

Crown Princess Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter came home, not that she really wanted to.

Cuteness had returned from the past knowing full well that this was the last trip she was going to take to pre-Crystal Tokyo Time. If Pluto had her way, Cuteness would never travel in time again. Stupid paradoxes.

She tried not to cry. Really she did, but her Daddy was alive and waving to her and hugging her and everything just a minute ago. He'll be here too, but alive-Daddy's hugs beat dead-Daddy's hugs every time. Cuteness fell to her knees and began to shake with silent tears.

"_Your back! Oh! We have to tell the Queen!" _Cuteness almost didn't register Duchess Granger's flawless Lunarian speech. Why didn't the Pluto of the Twentieth Century ever talk to her in Lunarian? She supposedly taught it to everyone else not long after Cuteness left. _"Guards channel one. Alert the Queen that her daughter has returned. Immediately!"_

As Cuteness began to lift her head, she felt a pair of soft arms wrap around her from behind.

"_You miss him already, I know. But... I've got a surprise for you my Princess. I suppose I should say your mother has a surprise for you, but I promise it will make you ever so happy. I know it will!" _

With care and grace born of picking up the same crying girl countless times over too many years, the Royal Emissary to the Magical Nations of Earth collected the nine year old immortal Crown Princess and carried her out of the Royal Family Suite's private entry foyer.

…

Queen Serenity the Second was a nervous wreck. Queen Pluto had been hinting at her daughter's imminent arrival for almost two hours now. Tea and small talk was all well and good, but if she picked up and inspected the new scepter just one more time it would start to show wear marks from constant handling. If a pink haired Princess didn't show up sometime in the next five minutes, Usagi was going to rip that goddamn cup out of Setsuna's hands and ram it up her-

"_Your Highness! News from Duchess Granger! Your daughter has returned!" _Usagi didn't remember just who that guard was but he was going to get a bonus.

Despite the joyful news Her Highness's nerves only multiplied. Her stomach was doing cartwheels and what little tea had made it down her throat was threatening to come back up.

For a millennium, Queen Serenity the Second has been the anchor, heart and soul of the human race as they rose up from the Earth's surface to rebuild an interplanetary utopia and reclaim lost realms. For centuries Usagi calmly fought through the fits and trials of being the only parent of an immortal child on top of her day job of Running Everything. Ever since her husband died, Usagi's absolute control was all that anyone who met Queen Serenity the Second ever saw outside of her personal bed chambers. The few who did visit Her Highness inside of her bed chambers and who did see her emotionally collapse could all be counted on two hands. Two of them were Lunar cats. Two others were ghosts.

All of this legendary control was going to shit in epic fashion and the Queen of Earth was loving every minute of it. Setsuna knew why this was happening, of course, and she couldn't be happier. She didn't even need to check the Gates to ensure that she had claimed the best time in the pool.

What pool, you ask? The 'How quickly after resurrection do Harry and Usagi fuck?' pool, of course.

Setsuna picked the first available time block, the one covering from the resurrection itself to the one hour mark. Duchess Lovegood wanted to go double or nothing with Pluto that Harry would get Usagi out of her nickers in fifteen minutes or less but Pluto refused.

By the time Duchess Granger finally stepped into their room, the Moon Queen was vibrating with nervous energy. Where was a youma when you needed one?

There they were!

"_Oh, thank God!" _Usagi leapt at the women and pulled her daughter close. _"Cuteness! Oh, sweetheart, wipe those tears away. While you've been away, I finished a very important task."_

Usagi held her daughter at arm's length for a moment. The girl was beginning to show signs of confusion mixed in with her sadness. Usagi had firmly pushed any need to have a mother-daughter reunion back into a deep corner of her mind in favor of much more important things. In her defense, Cuteness only left for the past three weeks ago- and for immortals that was more like the blink of an eye to anyone else. They could have even planned it closer than that but Cuteness may have figured out her homecoming surprise before leaving and that would have impacted the time-line downstream too much.

"_I made something for you, Cuteness." _It always got the girl's attention when someone used the name Daddy gave her. So few people ever did these days. Usagi let go of her daughter long enough to retrieve the new Scepter of Prissiness and bring it back.

"_Do you see the top of this Scepter?"_

The Princess paused for a moment and then nodded.

"_This crystal moon used to belong to your Grand Aunt Tranquility before Har- your father got it. Do you know what he used it for?"_

Pink streamers shook back and forth. No.

"_He used it to bring me back to life." _Usagi watched her daughter's red eyes jump up and lock with her blue ones before staring hard at the scepter. Usagi gently held it out to her girl.

"_Daughter. I present to you the Scepter of Prissiness. I made it for you. With it, you will help me bring your father back to us." _Usagi placed a quick peck on Cuteness's forehead before moving behind the girl. Seconds later, mother and daughter had all four hands on the prismatic crystal shaft. _"I've gone far too __long without my husband and you've gone far too long without your father. Help me. Help me call him back. Please."_

As a desperate woman coaxed her daughter into the right frame of mind to use the white magic focus, a select group of people began collect in support of Usagi. Only those who were close enough to be considered close friends and loved ones even knew what Usagi had planned.

"Ready to come back?" Hermione was standing next to the ghost of the hour. "I hope you don't expect to get much rest in the first decade or two."

The English that Harry and Hermione spoke to each other in may be considered a dead language on the planet they were born on but speaking it was a good way to stay connected with their past.

"Errr... maybe I could just become an emissary to the Underworld or something. To be honest, being dead teaches you how utterly stupid most living people are. I'm not sure I want to get back to ruling the Empire with a fair-yet-firm hand like I used to. It's a lot of work and look what I got for it. Some watery tart threw a sword at me! That _hurt_."

A water elemental had impaled him with a blade soaked in demon's blood. After the moistened bint bought it, they learned that she had attempted to destroy the Immortal King's soul with her attack. She failed of course but her attack did block the Moon Queen's attempts to bring the king back to life.

Harry got used to being dead early on. After all, the vast majority of his close friends and family could still see and speak to him. Even his daughter could though sadly no such luck with Usagi. Harry ended up spending much of his time devoted to his daughter giving her as much love as a ghost could give. It also led to a wonderful friendship with Queen Serenity the First. She helped Harry get over the shock of first learning that he was, in fact, dead.

"I don't mean running the Empire, Harry. That sexy hot wife of yours is about to break a three hundred year long dry spell." They both looked at the woman who was curled around her daughter, whispering instructions and encouragement into the little Princess's ear.

"Oh. Oh bloody hell, what am I going to do?" Harry thanked God that ghosts don't get nervous tummies.

"Language! And I remember quite well that you know exactly what to do." Hermione blushed. That was a very, very, very long time ago. Although... maybe it was about time to make another offer like that one again? After the happy couple had enough time to properly settle down some, of course.

"_Pity I won't be around long enough to see the second and third rounds." _Queen Serenity the First spoke up. Late Twentieth Century Japanese: Another dead language that only a few immortals would be able to understand without magical or technological translators doing the work.

"_Do you really have to leave? I got used to having a Ghost-in-Law... and Silly Story Time with Cuteness just won't be the same without you." _Harry began to feel a pull. The novelty of feeling anything at all almost made him forget what this feeling meant.

"_Sod it all. Well, I guess this is goodbye then, Senny. _'Mione, I'll get back with you after Usagi has her evil way with me or whatever." Harry reached over to the ghost queen and passed through her in a ghostly hug. Seconds later, he was no longer in charge of his own movements.

Around the two female Lunar Royals, the crowd of friends, avatars and mahou shoujo which were allowed to see this resurrection were, to a (wo)man, pulling out sunglasses. Anyone who witnessed the Moon Queen cast magic on a regular basis learned to be prepared for her signature white flash.

Within a growing nexus of pure white energy, the Moon Queen and Moon Princess held tightly onto the Scepter of Prissiness as it's crystal shaft and headpiece absorbed raw Lunar White Magic and stored it until the scepter's entire length was glowing like a miniature solar flare. When the absolute maximum amount of power was achieved an oddly musical whistle began to fill the air. It was time.

"_Harry James Potter-"_

"_DADDY!"_

"_You come here RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"_

So he did.

-CRACK-

"Bloody hell, woman! Couldn't you have magicked me up some clothes to go with the body?!" He was starkers, not that mother and daughter cared. The two females had practically teleported to his side and were now squeezing the most important man in their lives hard enough to rival the dreaded Mollywobble Death Grip.

"Well at least I brought you back naked in a room full of people you know and love! YOU, on the other hand, brought ME back naked in a room full of complete strangers!" Usagi pulled her face off of Harry's chest and pinned her husband's green eyes with her blue.

"_If I may have everyone's attention! You truly don't know how much it means to me to have those I love here to see our family once more become whole. Thank you all so much. But... but now, I have some vitally important things to discuss in private with Mister Potter and it absolutely cannot wait one second longer. Ami? 'Mione? Please see everyone out." _Not once did she look away from Harry.

As two of Usagi's very closest friends saw her guests out, money started changing hands.

"_...well it has been a while..."_

"_...but surely they could have waited a little bit longer..."_

"_...you mussn't cry over spilt molasses."_

"_Venus, that's not how it goes!"_

"_Whatever, Mars."_

"_You're just pissed you lost the pool."_

"_Shut up, Mercury."_

A minute later, only three remained. Three? Oh- yeah... right.

"_Cuteness, dear?"_

"_Yes, Momma?" _The pink haired girl's face was still buried in her father's side.

"_You were with your Daddy earlier today, weren't you?"_

"_Yes, Momma."_

"_You know I haven't seen him for three hundred years, Princess. And... and during that time you did get to see him and talk to him even..." _Usagi finally broke eye contact with her husband so that she could better deal with her pink haired clone.

"_I want a baby unicorn." _Still buried in her father's side.

"_I beg your pardon?" _Usagi didn't quite get that.

"_You want Daddy all to yourself for grown-up stuff." _She looked up at her mother with an innocent face to better hide that bit of Slytherin she got from Daddy. _"You need me to leave for that and I want a baby unicorn."_

"_Deal, Cuteness. I swear we'll meet up for dinner. I'll also set aside more time for you just as soon as I've seen to your mother's nargle infestation." _Harry was holding Usagi tight now, he didn't want her to spoil the deal.

"_Not nargles, Daddy. Cooties." _She finally detached from his side and skipped back a few steps. _"See you at dinner! I'll be down in the stables cleaning out a stall!"_

Cuteness stuck a hand in her bag and pulled out her training broom. Before the surprised queen could order her daughter to cease and desist, Cuteness hopped on and zipped away through a side entrance. Seconds later, startled cries were heard from Mercury and Venus as the girl buzzed them on the way to the Royal Stables.

"_I'll get her for this!" _Usagi still hadn't gotten over the idea of being blackmailed by her own daughter.

"_No you won't, Love. In five minutes you won't even care." _Harry smirked and regained his wife's attention.

"_I won't? Are you so sure?" _Suddenly, she seemed to remember the reason she politely told everyone to sod off just a minute ago. Nervous excitement flooded her and she blushed like a schoolgirl. _"Five minutes?"_

"_You won't... and it's less than five minutes now." _Harry pulled her a little closer, just enough to remind her that he's still starkers without breaking eye contact. _"Someone is overdressed for the occasion, Love. Let's take care of that shall we?"_

"_As you wish, Husband dear." _With a hungry leer, Usagi grabbed her man by a conveniently placed handle and dragged him back to her- no, their- bed chambers.

Almost nine months later to the day, the next earthly... er, moonly... incarnation of the spirit who was Queen Serenity the First was born. More than eleven thousand years was a long time to wait to be reborn but she finally got to be with those she loved again.

It was worth it.

**End of Story – The Girl Who Loved**

**Read Part Two: Violence Inherent in the System!**

REV 09/2012


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